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Homophobia totally the fault of straight women, according to Men’s Rights Redditors

Men forced into macho straightjacked by straight women's expectations, out cruising for chicks.
Men forced into hypermasculine role by straight women, out cruising for chicks.

So we learned the other day from that Man Going His Own Way that male violence was, like, totally the fault of evil sexy ladies. Now, from this Men’s Rights Redditor, we learn that homophobia — or at least homophobia directed at gay men — is all the fault of straight women and their desire for macho dudes. Because straight men don’t ever express any sort of hostility towards gay or effeminate men — it’s just those darn ladies!

I've said this many times in different circumstances, but I fully believe the push for hyper-masculinity is not caused by a desire to prove masculinity to ones peers or caused by some latent homophobia. The cause of hyper-masculinity and its associated homophobic undertones is caused by straight women and what they as a group have deemed "totally unacceptable" in a mate.  Appearing gay (I'm gay) has never really caused me any heartache within a group of men. Even if those men don't know I'm gay and just think I'm an effeminate weirdo. In mixed groups of men and women, it has. I think it stems from female judgement of men who aren't "masculine enough" to be inferior for relationships, men pick up on it and boost up the masculinity and inter-male aggression/intolerance of behaviors not considered normal.  It also comes from widespread female intolerance of any sort of homosexual or "appearing homosexual" behavior in potential mates, an intolerance which isn't found among men. Ask any straight man you know if he would dump his girlfriend/wife if he found out she had lesbian sex before they were dating. Now ask any straight woman you know if she would dump her boyfriend/husband if she found out he had gay sex before they were dating. I have asked these questions to many people. The answers have always backed up my position. I actually had a couple women tell me that they would leave their husbands if they found out that he had fooled around with a guy as young as highschool.
But, huh, what about all those straight dudes who are always calling other dudes “gay” and, you know, that other word that starts with an “f?”

Well, apparently that’s just playful joshing. No harm, no foul! If anything, it shows how wonderfully tolerant of gayness these guys are. I mean, come on, if you can’t see this, you must be stupid, or something. Or so says this other Men’s Rights Redditor:

It takes some advanced cognitive ability to comprehend why most men tease one another for being gay. It has little to do with homosexuality, real or perceived. It is about acceptance. It is also about challenging perception. When one man calls his friend "gay", he is playfully asserting his own dominance over his friend. He is also insinuating not only that he would still accept and love his friend, but also that he recognizes that everyone's at least a little gay, and that they have both grown out of any childish notions of homosexuality being bad and thereby being hurt by being called "gay". They are sharing a bonding experience of mutual acceptance, playfulness, and even affection through this social ritual. One could even suggest that faux male gay shaming is a method of expressing homosexuality in a manner that rates low enough on the kinsey scale to suit their comfort.  Or we could just take it at face value and refuse to explore the psychodynamic behind the process. It seems more convenient when obtuseness is a preferred weapon.

They’re just having a little fun. You’re not against fun, are you?

Thanks to the AgainstMen’sRights subreddit for pointing me to these quotes.

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pecunium
8 years ago

Argenti: Oh so that’s why you wear a skirt! (Note to the rest of you, for the purpose of this post kilt = skirt)

A kilt is a skirt. It’s a type, as is a broomstick, or a panel, or a wraparound, or a mini, etc.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I live in a fairly small city and still see homeless women all over the place. In London you can’t walk more than a few blocks in the West End without seeing homeless teenagers of both sexes camping out.

Nepenthe
Nepenthe
8 years ago

Ever seen a homeless woman? Me neither.

Go fuck yourself. I have. The person I love more

pecunium
8 years ago

At some point you decided that men ware the enemy and all chance of making the world better was lost

She did? How do you know this?

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Are you watching Buffy from the start, cloudiah? I’ve never seen it. But then I only ever watched one ep of The X Files, too …

Speaking of which, I hear Matt Smith is leaving Dr Who. Anyone got a wish list for the next Doctor?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Is it weird that I’ve never owned a proper kilt as an adult? I had one as a child, and I have a mini kilt that I bought in my teens, but no proper kilts. My father must be so ashamed.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Re Buffy, you guys know that Jenny Trout (she of the awesome 50 Shades mockery posts) is also doing Bufft recaps?

Nepenthe
Nepenthe
8 years ago

Sorry, cat posted.

Anyway, the woman I love more than anyone else in the world was homeless for years. Probably because the patriarchy loves women.

You’re not funny anymore Sparky. Now you’re just reminding me of the assholes who are shitty to her.

*spits in your general direction*

pecunium
8 years ago

I just ordered a new one (modern). I have three plaids, and one solid trad (black watch, US Army, and Calif). I have a two moderns, but neither is quite right in the waist, one of of them is going back for adjustment this week. The other I need to repair (i.e. make smaller).

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Cassandra – does this mean you’re No True Scotswoman? :O

Shiraz
Shiraz
8 years ago

Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the X-Files are some of the best things ever.

Troll can still go fuck himself.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I also hate whisky and barely tolerate haggis. I am a Bad Scot. Um, I like all of the sweets, including whisky flavored things?

katz
8 years ago

Has anyone else seen a homeless woman?

Not just seen, but enumerated. Census job.

(Yes, I was taking advantage of the government’s chivalrous quotas to get three whole days of work.)

Kittehserf
8 years ago

I hope kilts are cheaper in the US than they are here, pecunium!

cloudiah
8 years ago

Nepenthe, my cat actually made an Outlook Calendar appointment for me, that came up today. It just said “h hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhuuuiuiuuuu’

I tried to attend that meeting, but it didn’t have a location. Buster is just not a very good personal assistant.

pecunium, thanks for the spoons explanation.

And kittehs, yes, I have been watching from the beginning. That and The Wire. And assorted Criterion films. I got a Roku and have temporarily subscribed to EVERYTHING so I am trying to watch EVERYTHING until I cancel most of it.

cloudiah
8 years ago

@katz, Census work is hard. Thank you for doing it. I just found my grandfather in the 1920s census, so I’m feeling very favorably disposed towards census workers.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

I Am a Bad Scot, another band name!

The one time I tried haggis was soooo disappointing. Serves me right for eating it in a pub, I guess. Tasted like ordinary mincemeat that had been soaked in natron pepper for forty days.

At least the neeps and tatties were good.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Tsk, tsk, cloudiah – of course Buster is a very good PA, it’s not her fault you can’t read Cat. You should be grateful when one of the furry overlords does things for you, you, you human.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Haggis is kind of a specialized thing, I wouldn’t recommend eating it in any place that doesn’t focus on it. It also requires a certain ability to not think about how it’s made, at least for me.

Hmm, I wonder if my cousin who lives in Australia could be recruited into this hypothetical band…not only does she love U2 far more than Simple Minds, she married an Englishman.

pecunium
8 years ago

Kittehs: I hope kilts are cheaper in the US than they are here, pecunium!

They vary. 75-200 is the going price for non-wool (very good fake wool, or non-wool-like materials). For wool (light, 6-8 oz, 4-6 yards) the prices run from 150-300.

There is a woman in Ariz. who went to Scotland and learned how to weave plaids for kilts. She starts at about 800USD for a 6-8 yard, in a 6-8 oz weight. I’d like to get a couple from her US Army, pleated to stripe, and a Calif. pleated to sett).

katz
8 years ago

At least the neeps and tatties were good.

I love British things that sound like you’re speaking a made-up language.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Bubble and squeak is my favorite (the sound of it, not the taste). Also toad in the hole.

melody
8 years ago

I have horrid luck. My bed frame broke today. Boo.

And as far as homeless individuals I met several youth who had been homeless for several years. Boys and girls.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Don’t forget Spotted Dick!

(This is turning into that conversation Nanny and Granny had about food names in Foreign all being rude.)

Pecunium – yup, that’s cheaper than here. A standard 8 yard kilt is about $550.

pecunium
8 years ago

Kittehs, for a wool kilt, the going price for an 8 yard, in 8 oz is about 750USD.

pecunium
8 years ago
CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

To be fair odd names for food are common all over the world. What about imam bayildi (literally “the imam fainted”)?

Kittehserf
8 years ago

melody, that’s a pain! I hope you weren’t in the bed when it happened. Is it a wood frame?

I see one homeless woman most mornings – not to talk to, since she spends most of her time screaming abuse at passsers-by. There are far too many homeless people in Melbourne; not surprising given our totally disgusting housing situation (in a word: unaffordable). Hell, just ask any Big Issue vendor – funny how lying trollboy has managed never to see any of them in London.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I get the grass one, but I have to question the wisdom of a bacon scented candle.

pecunium
8 years ago

And, for them as was asking:

Yarn

And a close up.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Oh, maybe our prices are better! Is heavier more expensive? The ones I’m looking at are 13 oz.

LOL those candles! Perfect!

But aren’t they mangina candles anyway? Because, you know, candles.

pecunium
8 years ago

It says, “riding mower”… So I think engine smell, and rubber tires and gasoline and grass.

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
8 years ago

@ casandra

I knew an Asian guy once who applied to join the police. He asked that his test be marked using the same criteria as if he were white. He wanted to look his fellow officers in the eye.

I am sure women could do the same.

pecunium
8 years ago

The weight is how much one yard of wool weighs.

pecunium
8 years ago

I am sure women could do the same.

They do.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I propose that we all continue to ignore hat dude’s nattering about his imaginary friends.

The problem with the idea of mangina candles (well, one of the problems) is that I expect them to smell like…well…

Which would be a lot more appropriate for the bedroom than bacon. I think the bacon candle would make me wake up in the middle of the night dying for a sandwich.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Engine and rubber? Eww!

Bacon … yeah, I like the smell of it when it’s cooking and I’m about to eat it (very rarely here, most mornings over There). But otherwise? Nope. Not keen on food smells being around generally, except fruit.

Every time I think of ride-on mowers I think of my BiL going A over T off the back of his when he hit accelerate and wiped himself off on a branch. He wasn’t hurt, I hasten to add. My sister’s reaction: “Why do you always do these things when I’m not there with a camera? We could make a fortune on Australia’s Funniest Home Videos!”

😀

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Speaking of SCENTED FUCKING CANDLES!!

I made a note in the grocery store to ask if religious candles or citronella candles are misandry? (Also, do the later work? I am totally a mosquito buffet)

pecunium
8 years ago

Feddy: Ever spent time with the British Army? I have (I was chosen to do an exchange). In case you weren’t aware, the Army has women in it.

They do the same drills, as the men. They hump the same loads in their bergens. They wear the same helmets, shoot the same rifles, walk the same distances.

They don’t ask for special treatment. And they do it just as well as the men.

You could learn something from them; stop whinging, and ruck up.

melody
8 years ago

Nope. I tossed my bag on it and down it went. It is a metal frame. Now my box frame and mattress are on the floor. *sighs*

Have you seen the scented candles with rings in them:
http://www.diamondcandles.com/products/cuddle

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Heheh mangina candles in the bedroom have got my mind all pleasantly tangenty …

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Also!

Pecunium — man enough to unabashedly say he wears a skirt. Which is, of course, good sir, why you were knighted! XD

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
8 years ago

@ melody

Simply screaming at people does not mean you are homeless. If she was clean and well dressed she was living somewhere.

Or maybe she was a feminist. Most of them have HUGE houses.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Citronella candles of the giant stick them in the ground in the yard variety have worked for me, and my skin is apparently catnip for mosquitos.

Nova
Nova
8 years ago

First and foremost, congrats LBT!

I must be a really crappy MRA delusion feminist.

When I got divorced, I didn’t get a penny. In fact, my ex drained $15K out of the business bank account, leaving it overdrawn. Three weeks after I was diagnosed with cancer and had just started chemotherapy. All because he was afraid that I would be too sick to work and… no way was he EVER going to go to work instead.

My SO didn’t pay for a single date for the three weeks between meeting eachother and moving in together, because reasons that are nobody’s business. Didn’t really matter to me.

I don’t take advantage of female quotas for hiring as… well, I made my own job. Chivalry? Is that like holding the door for people. As a rule, I hold the door open for anyone, regardless of age, gender, etc because manners. Yes, even men. I really suck at this.

I do see myself getting married again, because… who knows, the feminist hivemind spermjacking man kicking indoctrination may actually work this time and I’ll really be able to pull off the traditional “woman steals man’s sperm, cuckholds him, cleans him out in a divorce and soaks him for child support” American marriage. No, actually, it’s because I love my SO. I want to see him when I look at my children. I want to sit on the porch with him, eat sunflower seeds and tell the neighborhood kids to pull their damn pants up. I want him to be the one that farts in bed next to me for the next 50+ years. I could care less about the legal contract, as long as he’s the one pretending that my boobies are radio tuners and he’s trying to find the Russian TV channel until the day I die.

My parents are already dead.

I saw a homeless woman yesterday in the check cashing store. I know, I should have taken pix and videos, because this is like coming across a unicorn, but… alas, I was too busy helping her fill out some forms and slipping some money into her hand before I left. I know, I really should have just stood and gawked. Someday I’ll learn.

/sarcasm

pecunium
8 years ago

Kittehs It’s still cheaper than Scotland, where a 10 oz eight yard was running about £600.

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

*hands the Fedora a rucksack* granted, it’s technically a woman’s bag, because the men’s just didn’t fit (too short and thin, pecunium do men’s bags sit weird on you too?)

You can put your hat, um…well…I guess it’d fit between the expanding front (back) panel and the bag proper. Just don’t lean on anything or you’ll crush it!

Kittehserf
8 years ago

A metal frame collapsing! Bummer.

How about a candle that smells like cat fur?

I never can figure out how cats get their fur smelling so good when their spit smells, well, gakk
Cat alchemy, I expect.

Kittehserf
8 years ago

Six hundred pounds! Ouch!

Hey all, we’re trying to ignore the troll, he’s just here for the lulz and isn’t worth answering.

cloudiah
8 years ago

So, I’m just sitting here in my HUGE house, eating bon bons, shopping for useless crap online, and cleaning and dressing screaming women so that I can send them back out on the street to impersonate homeless people.

What about you guys? Doing anything interesting?