In a post ostensibly about the imminent arrival of female Viagra, our dear friend JudgyBitch weighs in on yet another subject about which she knows shit: the reasons that women who are not her might not want to have sex with their husbands:
Loss of libido in women, excepting rare medical conditions, in my opinion, is a direct result of not seeing men as emotionally complex beings. If you’re married, at some point, your husband probably stood in front of you and promised to love you forever. Rejecting him physically is a very wounding thing to do. It hurts. Sex is one of the most important, intimate ways married couples show that they love one another. Refusing to have sex with your husband is telling him, in a very painful way, that you don’t love him. That you don’t care for him or about him.
Huh. If I hadn’t seen her on video, thus confirming her status as an adult human female, I would have a hard time believing that it was an actual woman saying this and not some horny, creepy teenage boy in the process of trying to manipulate his girlfriend into “going all the way.”
Oh, but she’s got more:
I guess the only way to justify that is to think of men as emotionless. It doesn’t hurt men to be rejected because they don’t feel anything to begin with.
Really? The only way to justify saying “no” to your husband when you don’t want to have sex with him is if you convince yourself he’s emotionless? But women should just force themselves to say “yes” to sex when they don’t want to and simply endure what follows?
That’s the ugly little reality behind female viagara. Will it actually boost women’s libido? Who knows. What difference will it make, though, if women are going to continue to see men as less than completely human? That’s the real problem.
Does anyone know where to get irony meters at a reasonable price? Mine just leapt off the table, ran around the room screaming, and exploded.
I was thinking about that too! You have expressed it better than my mental process.
Damn, I keep conflating JudgyBitch with Judge Judy. Pardon the typo in my comment above.
The sex=love argument. I have heard it far too many times.
I meant the couples with problems I knew about, I also believe it’s far more complicated than that.
There are bound to be some women who are being sexually abused in relationships with men who come across this article and take it to heart, thereby maintaining narratives that manipulate them into “accepting” their abuse. And then if those relationships have children they may be exposed to such narratives as they watch the interactions between their mothers and fathers. And then they’ll most likely internalize all of those narratives as they grow up. I know that some people might see that as a slippery slope, but I think things like that happen very often.
The very thought makes me feel sick. Just because she’s on the internet doesn’t mean that she can’t cause real damage. In fact, she probably already has – with her words alone.
Fuck you JB. You are beyond despicable.
I’m not sure why, but JudgyBitch (aka Janet Bloomfield) is The Worst of the Worst. She just terrifies me. I’ve called her “Courtney Love of the Internet,” but in fact that’s an insult to Love, who at least has written some great song lyrics.
I mean “the Courtney Love of the Manosphere,” Ugh, I’m having trouble today, better quit posting.
who is the worst in your opinion? JudgyBitch or TyphonBlue?
She’s not even subtle with this shit. Why can’t a man sacrifice his boner so his wife doesn’t have to have sex when she’s too tired? Why is it always the woman who has to suck it up and please her man?
I kind of want to watch those youtube videos but I am also scared. I was just going to mute the video and troll in the comments. But I’m afraid of seeing nasty shit in the comments, with like 30+ votes or something.
yep… same here.
Also, by her “logic”, when a man doesn’t want to have sex with his wife, is he a complete misogynist then?
I know I’m preaching to the choir here, but her entire premise is… off.
So she’s saying that the real reason some women have low libidos is because they don’t see their husbands as full human beings deserving of sex. If that’s the case, why would this hypothetical woman be taking female Viagra?
Via her argument, the giving of sex to a husband is proof that the wife views the husband as human, but if the wife views the husband as human she would never have lost her libido in the first place.
I’m trying to think through a migraine, so maybe I’m missing something here, but I’m having trouble identifying exactly what she’s complaining about.
Sorry for so many posts, and off topic, but racist asshats are flipping their shit over the new cheerios ad. The ad has a family with a white mom, black dad, and their daughter. Apparently that’s uber-offensive to some.
@augochlorella, I noticed the same thing at first, but then the rest of the “logic” threw me off.
How do people get this bad at arguing? I get how sometimes people can hold racist or sexist views, since they were raised that way and never saw it on paper, but she sees her own stuff like daily, and many criticisms of her stuff too… How do these things not cross her mind?
Wow. I am almost embarrassed for JB at her display of logic. You know, I don’t pretend to know JB or know anything about her life, but here she is completely acting as if she knows every woman on the planet. I will give her credit for at least saying, “in my opinion” but then she counteracts that by taking her own opinion so seriously and acting as if it’s fact. Needless to say, she has no idea what she’s talking about in this whole process. I feel the need to start throwing books at her. Hopefully she’ll either start writing less and reading more or one of them will hit her and knock some sense into her delusional head.
The kind of man who would see his partner’s lack of libido as an emotionally core-wounding blow is probably very emotionally complicated, but not very emotionally mature.
“Also, by her “logic”, when a man doesn’t want to have sex with his wife, is he a complete misogynist then?”
Here’s a discussion you’ll never see be touched around the manosphere. If it is, a million dollars says that they’d say, “If a man rejects a woman for sex, chances are she was being a selfish bitch and deserves no reward for her misbehavior.”
I had a bf who pretty much loss interest in being sexual with me entirely several months into our relationship. Was it a difficult for me to deal with that? Yes. Did I think he meant he did not see me as a human being? Not for a second. My libido-less bf still had far more respect for me as a woman then JB here. She can go to hell. I will never understand why some people have to be so willfully vile. All I can figure out to do about it right now is go buy some Cheerios.
then s/b than. Sorry, I can’t let that one go uncorrected.
@ grumpycatisagirl
Cheerios sound pretty good to me right now too.
Honey nut Cheerios are fabulous. Especially with extra honey.
@Cloudiah
Ha! I missed the ‘standard vagina access’ discussion. A clear example of how ingrained the equation “sex=treating your partner like an emotionally complex human being=love” is to MRAs.
I would go further and mention that people of any gender can have sex for good mutual fun, but there’s just so much JB can take at a time. “Crrrr… casual sex does not equal selfish golddigger…zzzbblll…. gender is more complex than binary model… ccrrrrzzzz BAM *brain blown.*”
(That’s my depiction of what would happen if JB realized the wealth of possibilities in human interactions)
In case anyone was curious, here is the Cheerios ad:
http://img1.catalog.video.msn.com/Image.aspx?uuid=0255fe0a-673d-4204-963a-223ee1de0918&w=624&h=351&so=4
[TW – pedophilia/rape.]
That reminds me about her post about poor persecuted pedophiles who fell for the trap laid by 12 year old girls to have sex with them for free candy (hypergamy, of course). Does that fit anywhere in this model of sexuality? (It’s a rhetorical question, I don’t really want to know)
Bleach shower time!
arg! Well, here is a site you can watch it. The comments are ok too.
http://img1.catalog.video.msn.com/Image.aspx?uuid=0255fe0a-673d-4204-963a-223ee1de0918&w=624&h=351&so=4