So “dating” guru Roosh has a post up on his Return of Kings blog by another self-professed dating guru, Alex Matlock, who rates various types of “bad sex” according to the type of female partner who’s involved in them, including such charmingly named types as “The one that tries too much (aka The Disaster)” and “The one that doesn’t move (aka The Starfish or The Doll).”
I expected a good deal of standard-issue manosphere misogyny in Matlock’s list, but I honestly couldn’t make it past his description of what he regards as the second-worst type of female sex partner: “The one that’s scared (aka The Virgin).” Because what he’s describing doesn’t sound so much like “bad sex” as “date rape.”
[TRIGGER WARNING for what follows; emphasis mine.]
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This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usually sits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.
Uh, Mr. Matlock, I’m hoping for everyone’s sake that this is a hypothetical “humorous” scenario you’ve come up with for the sake of this article and not something you’ve been a part of in the actual real world on a regular basis, because, unless you’ve left out that portion of the hypothetical events in which the woman in question clearly and unequivocally consents to having sex with your hypothetical protagonist here, what you’ve just described as “bad sex” (for the hypothetical dude) is actually a description of, well, rape from the point of view of the rapist.
In which case that twinge of guilt your hypothetical protagonist hypothetically feels is probably just the tiny part of his hypothetical self that’s still human reacting to the fact that he JUST (hypothetically) FUCKING RAPED SOMEONE.
MRAs and PUAs and manospherean assholes generally like to pretend that consent is some weird and mysterious thing, but it’s really not. Here’s a hint: if a women looks at you with fear in her eyes and pushes you away all while sitting in a position that makes sex difficult …. all that means NO.
The fact that Matlock — despite those twinges of guilt — still doesn’t regard this as the worst kind of “bad sex” (for the guy) but merely the second-worst adds a certain level of absurdity to the horror.
Given Roosh’s publication of this piece by Matlock, and the fact that he himself has already confessed to committing what would be considered date rape by American standards by having sex with at woman too inebriated to give consent, perhaps it’s time to stop referring to Roosh as a dating guru and to start referring to him as a date rape guru.
I don’t really have anything else to say.
Here, as brain bleach, are some cats with smaller versions of themselves:
You’re dead right about that, such people can’t be trusted to be either accurate, logical, or consistent about anything, & esp. not anything that affects their self-interests.
I think we’ve touched on this before–MRAs as a group spend a hell of a lot of time talking about rape.
And Cassandra hits it out of the park.
It’s why we call them the abusers’ lobby, after all–their other big bugaboo is dometic violence, where they are bound and determined to stop people from acknowledging that it’s a big problem.
The abusers’ and rapists’ lobby. The MRM.
BUUUUUT THEY ARREEEEEN’T A HAAAAATE GROOOOOUUPPP AAAAAAAAAAA
Perhaps MRAs are so focussed on their overwhelming love for themselves and their boners that they don’t notice the hatred …
What’s the deal with legos?? Legos don’t hurt to step on, that is a fact..
You need to do research then, with your bare feet.
I mean basically they’re telling everyone this is consensual non-consent kink while taking consent as a given.
No, asshole, it’s rape. Fuck off, Eurocreep.
I described what they were telling people. It’s obvious what it IS.
“You need to do research then, with your bare feet”
DDone and Conclusion Not hurting, except maybe a bit if stepping on it with the heel, but not for the rest of areas under the foot.
Yes, that’s what you said.
The problem is the subtext and the utterly creepy things you’ve said here before.
Gee, I can’t imagine why with your great track record here hellkell might say that to you. Hmm. What a mystery for the ages!
Pro-tip: if you want to put some distance between the way you live your life and the things these people say and do, it’s going to take more than a few words.
That’s all.
Marie and Aaliyah: Don’t use that tone with me! Do as I say, not as I do! When I was your age, it was…the mid-2000s.
whatis subtext & why does it matter???
🙂 🙂
@talacaris: Subtext is the reason you’re nothing but a bad joke.
@talacaris: also, my response was to Eurosabra, for anyone genuinely confused about what I was talking about. (I think most people know that he’s our PUA troll, while talacaris is our all purpose lulz-troll, right?)
Howie: “Subtext is the reason you’re nothing but a bad joke”
Don’t get it, and if so shouldn’t subtext be abolished.
*sigh*
Talacaris.
Subtext.
I don’t hate you, by the way. You’re too boring to hate.
I have $hitty ideas, sure, but obvious crime is obvious.
Eurosabra, I will repeat, trying to distance yourself from these people while still styling yourself a pick-up artist does not work. You carry their stink with you whenever you post.
I repeat: if you want to put some distance between the way you live your life and the things these people say and do, it’s going to take more than a few words.
Howie: You were linking me to my self-assesment which I made in support for my candidacy for the great TOTY awards. I don’t get what you mean by that.
Eurosabra: isn’t it true that as a self-proclaimed PUA, you spend your time trying to get women who don’t want to have sex with you, to have sex with you?
Don’t you get it that manipulation, your “mild gaslighting” – have you any idea how horrible that term is, and what it says about you? – and trickery all say you’re not interested in free, enthusiastic consent, but are coercing an unwilling woman? You do realise that’s just another form of rape, don’t you?
@talacaris: are you just playing dumb to get me to keep interacting with you? Or do you not understand what the word ‘subtext’ means?
wow… I really wanted to participate in this conversation, but I already lost the track :/
well, marie, you crack me up. people at the office starting staring at me and wondering what was so funny.
and I really wanted to learn Hungarian…. but I believe I would need an external brain hard drive for that.
I’d love to interact with the trolls too, but I’m a newbie at that hahahahhaha =D
Our culture generally makes some allowances for charm, charisma, and selling oneself romantically. I’ve lied, as I said, by denying illness and disability, sometimes to women who could see it. But no, I don’t accept your framing of that as coercion and I think if you inflate it to rape that’s going way too far, as feminists so often do. Anyway I’m sure surfacing again here has just given everyone license to pin~ata me again.
@pineapplecookies: don’t worry too much about following all of the conversation. Feel free to ignore the trolls, who come barrelling in with the specific intention of sidetracking the whole conversation.