So “dating” guru Roosh has a post up on his Return of Kings blog by another self-professed dating guru, Alex Matlock, who rates various types of “bad sex” according to the type of female partner who’s involved in them, including such charmingly named types as “The one that tries too much (aka The Disaster)” and “The one that doesn’t move (aka The Starfish or The Doll).”
I expected a good deal of standard-issue manosphere misogyny in Matlock’s list, but I honestly couldn’t make it past his description of what he regards as the second-worst type of female sex partner: “The one that’s scared (aka The Virgin).” Because what he’s describing doesn’t sound so much like “bad sex” as “date rape.”
[TRIGGER WARNING for what follows; emphasis mine.]
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This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usually sits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.
Uh, Mr. Matlock, I’m hoping for everyone’s sake that this is a hypothetical “humorous” scenario you’ve come up with for the sake of this article and not something you’ve been a part of in the actual real world on a regular basis, because, unless you’ve left out that portion of the hypothetical events in which the woman in question clearly and unequivocally consents to having sex with your hypothetical protagonist here, what you’ve just described as “bad sex” (for the hypothetical dude) is actually a description of, well, rape from the point of view of the rapist.
In which case that twinge of guilt your hypothetical protagonist hypothetically feels is probably just the tiny part of his hypothetical self that’s still human reacting to the fact that he JUST (hypothetically) FUCKING RAPED SOMEONE.
MRAs and PUAs and manospherean assholes generally like to pretend that consent is some weird and mysterious thing, but it’s really not. Here’s a hint: if a women looks at you with fear in her eyes and pushes you away all while sitting in a position that makes sex difficult …. all that means NO.
The fact that Matlock — despite those twinges of guilt — still doesn’t regard this as the worst kind of “bad sex” (for the guy) but merely the second-worst adds a certain level of absurdity to the horror.
Given Roosh’s publication of this piece by Matlock, and the fact that he himself has already confessed to committing what would be considered date rape by American standards by having sex with at woman too inebriated to give consent, perhaps it’s time to stop referring to Roosh as a dating guru and to start referring to him as a date rape guru.
I don’t really have anything else to say.
Here, as brain bleach, are some cats with smaller versions of themselves:
Because you juist admitted to actually raping somebody? In fact, you admitted to raping so many people that it is possible for you to compare them by their “levels of resistance.”
If you don’t want people to compare you to a rapist, don’t be a rapist, and don’t defend rapists.
It’s really fucking easy.
You remind me of a rapist too, BDP.
“Big Daddy Pat?” HAHAHAHAHA.
HEY FUCKO:
You are a rape apologist skidmark on the underdrawers of humanity, so fuck back off to the sewer you oozed out of.
You sounds like you know a thing or two about not getting consent.
@Pat
First of all, you’re minimizing some of the details in the OP. Second, did you read Argenti’s comment upthread? I know people who were raped in exactly this way – their lack of resistance was not consent, it was an attempt to get through the rape quickly and minimize the violence.
rofl
I’d honestly be pretty happy if my dad were like Katz. =P
Oh hells no. Someone tell me I’m like, hallucinating from drugged pizza or something, I knew I shouldn’t let my cousins bring over pizza! I can’t actually be seeing some newb fucking troll tell a regular to stop saying he reminds zir of zir rapist. And trying to play all “the grown ups are talking with Marie”.
Pepe’s start stocking magic mushrooms or something?!
Katz is awesome, but both my parents are pretty awesome too.
I should clarify. Many people remind me of the man who raped me, given that he was many things. You remind me of him when he was telling me what he did to the women he raped before me, gleefully recounting how they resisted and how they really wanted it. Lest you think you remind me of him because, like, you guys listen to the same music or something.
Pat, you don’t get to tell Nepenthe to stop, and no one but you is going to cry over them saying you remind them of their rapist (sorry Nepenthe, I don’t know your pronouns). It’s just stunning to me that you can hear someone say you sound just like the person who raped them, and pretend that you’re the wronged party.
BDP is pretty disgusting as far as trolls go, and that’s quite a feat.
Pat, you should go flush yourself, you big turd.
@emilygoddess
Right in one, though I’ll do female pronouns too.
@BDP
The whining over how the rape wasn’t as satisfying as he wanted, that’s another commonality.
Ah, but you see, creepy dude, what the allegory shows is that Roosh doesn’t know what consent looks like.
Also, you don’t get to make Nepenthe stop talking. In fact I believe that pretty much everyone here would like it if she would talk more and you would talk less.
Pat is a sick little fuck. He must believe that you can’t be a rapist unless you deliberately label yourself as one. That’s the thing about rapists and, by extension, rape apologists. They don’t like to label themselves with a word so obviously negative. It’s the behavior that counts, Pat, not the label. But I guess you can’t trust a white supremacist to understand something so clear and obvious.
Aye to Cassandra. And aye aye to GBP.
Fuck you, Pat. You remind me of a rapist, too.
Nepenthe, all the Jedi hugs you want, if any.
“So I totally fuck some girls who never say they want to have sex or give any indication that they do, aren’t enthusiastic, look all scared and shit, try to push me away, and sit in positions I can’t fuck them in, so I have to physically put them in a different position. But it was totally consensual because I just know they were only pretending not to want it.”
In fact, considering you said this happens to you, too, Pat, you don’t just remind me of a rapist. You ARE one. And so is Alex Matlock, and every other person who admitted to “having sex” with a person this way.
Pat, you and Alex are clearly both rapists. Racist douchenozzles too, I see.
Hugs to anyone (other than Pat, that rapist scum) who needs one.
I’m beginning to think that some of these PUA/MRA/MGTOW men who show up here think they’re counting coup. Then they can go back to their Home Stones* and brag ‘yeah, I told them argle bargle whoosh and they were all AAARGH and I escaped without a scratch’. And the other dudebros toast them with cheap, evil-smelling beer as Uber Alpha dogs.
*Gor reference.
Oh yay two MRA rapist on one thread. Just what I never wanted.
Delurking to second/umpteenth the sentiment that Pat-o here sounds a lot like a rapist. In fact, a lot like several of *my* rapists — you know, the ones who said they “knew I really wanted it” because to them I was “just playing coy games” when I was pushing them away/saying ‘no’/pleading with them to stop/type of thing.
Coincidentally, these are the ones who tended to later pull the “I didn’t consent to you not consenting, so you really raped ME by making me into a rapist” bullshit, if not just go with outright denial or gaslighting.
Not impressed. Rape-apologist guys and their supporters are jerkwads, every one,
As Ugh said (don’t even wanna try blockquotes yet):
“… if you’re taking it upon yourself to decide when women “actually” want to have sex, despite physically resisting you, you’re almost certainly a rapist.
Just don’t have sex with people who express [in any way] that they don’t want to have sex with you. Why is that so fucking hard?”
So not only do MRAs and PUAs willfully misunderstand the whole concept of consent, they willfully misunderstand the idea of role play in order to have yet another way of justifying rape.
Charming.
You know, just once, I would like to see these idiots explain why they need someone who does not want to have sex or wants to stop having sex beat them up in order to say no.
NOPE merely saying no, backing away, pushing away, freezing in fear that you can see in the OP, none of those are enough!
If Pat here proves anything, it’s that educating people about what rape actually is, is worth doing, since it does seem to be difficult for some people to recognise. So thanks pat, for proving a point for us that other MRAs have been trying to deny.
Oh well, it’s been a while since the blockquote monster got me …
Btw: an anecdote antidote to Black Hat’s nonsense —
Usually dudes never make me “feel [like] the center of the world/universe*”, probably because 1.) it’s not healthy to need another person to make you feel good, and 2.) I’m a lesbian. But that being said, there is one dude who can in fact make me feel like the only person alive, just by talking to me.
This is because he is a voluntary mute (no physical impediments or neuroatypicality; he just doesn’t want to talk to pretty much anyone, ever) — so whenever he does deem to speak to you, whoever you are, you feel like Jodie Foster in “Contact” except the aliens are asking if you’ve heard any good records lately and how your mom’s getting along.
Additionally, all of this guy’s social limitations aside — because the little dude has some weird habits; refusing to speak most of the time is only the most obvious — he is extremely empathetic towards other living beings, and were he to hear about “Game”, he would think it was incredibly insulting and degrading. To both men and women, but mostly to women, because he is in touch with reality and believes that women are human.
So … there’s that.
* Anyone else reminded of the ‘Fifty Shades’ trilogy? You know, how it was originally called ‘Master of the Universe’? And was written for an audience of people who think asshole men are attractive and women aren’t humans … ?