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Dating guru Alex Matlock: Sex with women who fear you and push you away might not be much fun

sayingno
Protip: This does not mean “yes.”

So “dating” guru Roosh has a post up on his Return of Kings blog by another self-professed dating guru, Alex Matlock, who rates various types of “bad sex” according to the type of female partner who’s involved in them, including such charmingly named types as “The one that tries too much (aka The Disaster)” and “The one that doesn’t move (aka The Starfish or The Doll).”

I expected a good deal of standard-issue manosphere misogyny in Matlock’s list, but I honestly couldn’t make it past his description of what he regards as the second-worst type of female sex partner: “The one that’s scared (aka The Virgin).” Because what he’s describing doesn’t sound so much like “bad sex” as “date rape.”

[TRIGGER WARNING for what follows; emphasis mine.]
.
.
.
.

This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usually sits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.

Uh, Mr. Matlock, I’m hoping for everyone’s sake that this is a hypothetical “humorous” scenario you’ve come up with for the sake of this article and not something you’ve been a part of in the actual real world on a regular basis, because, unless you’ve left out that portion of the hypothetical events in which the woman in question clearly and unequivocally consents to having sex with your hypothetical protagonist here, what you’ve just described as “bad sex” (for the hypothetical dude) is actually a description of, well, rape from the point of view of the rapist.

In which case that twinge of guilt your hypothetical protagonist hypothetically feels is probably just the tiny part of his hypothetical self that’s still human reacting to the fact that he JUST (hypothetically) FUCKING RAPED SOMEONE.

MRAs and PUAs and manospherean assholes generally like to pretend that consent is some weird and mysterious thing, but it’s really not. Here’s a hint: if a women looks at you with fear in her eyes and pushes you away all while sitting in a position that makes sex difficult …. all that means NO.

The fact that Matlock — despite those twinges of guilt — still doesn’t regard this as the worst kind of “bad sex” (for the guy) but merely the second-worst adds a certain level of absurdity to the horror.

Given Roosh’s publication of this piece by Matlock, and the fact that he himself has already confessed to committing what would be considered date rape by American standards by having sex with at woman too inebriated to give consent, perhaps it’s time to stop referring to Roosh as a dating guru and to start referring to him as a date rape guru.

I don’t really have anything else to say.

Here, as brain bleach, are some cats with smaller versions of themselves:

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Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

The original authors intention is making this post the
Laughing stock over there.

Oh no, a bunch of rapist apologists are laughing at us! Whatever shall we do!?!

gametime218
gametime218
11 years ago

Trying to excuse my shittiness?
HAHAHAHAHA
Rest assured sweetheart, my arrogant
foulmouthed rude behavior has nothing to
do with this issue. My issue is misrepresentation
of the original intent. The “virgin” means a girl
who pretends to not want to have sexual intercourse
when she actually does. It’s a common criticism.
The author should take note. He could criticize the sterotyping
Of the behavior or something but writing a post ignorant of
The original authors intention is making this post the
Laughing stock over there. Just a FYI. I’m not here for any
Other reason, so save your name calling and other empowering
Shoutdowns for someone who’s sensitive enough to be concerned
With your disapproval.

I’ll give you this: I’ve never seen someone troll in sonnet form before.

thekidwiththereplaceablehead

The “virgin” means a girl
who pretends to not want to have sexual intercourse
when she actually does.

Uh huh. Point out where this was said in the OP. David quoted the entire “virgin” section of the article, so there’s not a lot of context missing here.

cloudiah
11 years ago

He keeps pooping in the comment thread, and now he’s formatting his poop like it’s poetry? News flash: Poop is still poop. Roosh & Matlock are pro-rape. There’s no debate.

Aaliyah
11 years ago

I’m not here for any
Other reason, so save your name calling and other empowering
Shoutdowns for someone who’s sensitive enough to be concerned
With your disapproval.

I will certainly engage in name-calling. You’re a smug, demeaning rape apologist asshole. Fuck off.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

@thekid

If Duder here’s “arguments” are any indication, the context we’re missing is that apparently men, not women, are the ones who actually know when women want to have sex, and with whom.

cloudiah
11 years ago

Curses, gametime, you ninja! [shakes fist at sky]

Marie
Marie
11 years ago

@BigDaddy

Rest assured sweetheart, my arrogant
foulmouthed rude behavior has nothing to
do with this issue.

Rest assured, Sweetheart, the fact that you are trying to excuse rape still makes you an asshole.

My issue is misrepresentation
of the original intent.

Then please, by all means, tell us how it was misrepresented.

The “virgin” means a girl
who pretends to not want to have sexual intercourse
when she actually does.

Don’t lie to yourself, fucker, nowhere in the article was it said she wanted sex. Only that he was ignoring all the many, many cues she didn’t want sex: Fucking Fear! pushing him away…

If a girl is pretending she doesn’t want sex when she does, too bad, she just won’t get laid until she says yes. Pretending that this is common and therefore men should keep going even if they hear a ‘no’ (or get a nonverbal no) is just advocating rape.

Other reason, so save your name calling and other empowering
Shoutdowns for someone who’s sensitive enough to be concerned
With your disapproval.

Lol ’empowering shoutdowns’. I cuss whenever I damn feel like it, kid, its not just to rile you up. And it’s cute to see you care so much about our approval, or lack thereof, when the only reason we know about your shitty little opinions is you coming to this blog. It’s almost as if you just want attention.

BigDaddyPat
BigDaddyPat
11 years ago

Supporting date rape huh?
HAHAHAHAHAHA
You aren’t listening. The behavior he is describing is a type of coy game used. Her resistance isn’t real. No where in the post is rape supported or called for. The author here misunderstood that the guy who wrote the original article was referring to that specific scenario. The “fear in her eyes” and her “gently pushing you away” were an attempt to appear nervous, like a virgin. If you arent familiar with what they are talking about, a casual reading of the post makes it appear he is supporting rape. It isn’t the case this time. If he were supporting rape, you’d be well aware of it.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

Her resistance isn’t real

Where in the post does it say anything like that?

Also, her resistance is real, if he is physically trying to force her into positions that she doesn’t want to do. That is straight-up sexual assault.

If he were supporting rape, you’d be well aware of it.

No. Fucking. Kidding.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

@Duder

Also, you never answered my question: Why the fuck would someone have sex with a woman who is not expressing that she wants to have sex?

Marie
Marie
11 years ago

The behavior he is describing is a type of coy game used.

Being ‘game’ does not stop it from being rape.

Her resistance isn’t real

Proof plz. Because nowhere in the article does it say it’s not real, only in your delusional little head. But it’s disgusting to see what leaps of logic you’ll take to avoid admitting you’re a rape apologist.

The “fear in her eyes” and her “gently pushing you away” were an attempt to appear nervous, like a virgin.

You still need proof, you damn little disingenuous shit.

If you arent familiar with what they are talking about, a casual reading of the post makes it appear he is supporting rape.

If he really wasn’t supporting rape he should have made it clearer.

If he were supporting rape, you’d be well aware of it.

Don’t worry, bub, we are aware of it.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

“Virgin” means “person who has not had sex”, not “person who is pretending not to want sex”. How can you dumbasses expect anyone to take you seriously if you won’t acknowledge that words mean things?

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

Deciding that a person has consented to any sex act, despite hearing no indications that she actually has, is rape.

Your imaginary world where you can read other people’s minds does not translate into real-life consent.

BigDaddyPat
BigDaddyPat
11 years ago

By your logic, none of the other types of girls in the article expressed their consent verbally either. Were they all raped?
He’s criticizing the very fact that shes acting stupidly demure coy in an attempt to arouse the author. You can keep believing you know what the author meant and you can continue to try to insult me, but neither one is going to change the fact that the author was not supporting rape.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

I’m imagining that Pat, despite all indications to the contrary, really DOESN’T want to be a rape apologist.

I guess because I imagine it, you have to fuck off now, right?

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

By your logic, none of the other types of girls in the article expressed their consent verbally either. Were they all raped?

Odds are some of them were, most rapists are serial rapists. However, you get that there are nonverbal consent indicators, right? Like, I don’t know, positioning yourself to make sex easier instead of harder, pulling a person closer rather than pushing them away, etc.

BigDaddyPat
BigDaddyPat
11 years ago

This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usuallysits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.

The girl isn’t a virgin. She’s playing scared for a reaction. No where does she say yes or no.

Aaliyah
11 years ago

By your logic, none of the other types of girls in the article expressed their consent verbally either. Were they all raped?

The girl in the “virgin” scenario is expressing clear signs of non-consent you dipshit.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

@Pat

Also, still dodging the question. Why would anyone have sex with someone who is expressing that they don’t want to have sex?

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

No where does she say yes or no.

Physically resisting someone IS saying no. The fact that you keep ignoring that makes you creepy as all hell.

Marie
Marie
11 years ago

By your logic, none of the other types of girls in the article expressed their consent verbally either. Were they all raped?

You see, big daddy, the other girls in the article, big daddy, weren’t trying to get away from the person trying to have sex with them. IMO, consent should be worked out verbally, but if someone’s actively trying to push you away it takes it above ‘iffy’ to fucking rape.

He’s criticizing the very fact that shes acting stupidly demure coy in an attempt to arouse the author.

Neither you, or the author, is a mind reader, you dumb little fuck. Heck, no where in the damn article did the author speculate if she was doing it to arouse the author. You’re just pulling this shit out of your ass, cuz you’re a disingenuous little fuck. Also, if one is playing at resisting, you need a damn safe word.

You can keep believing you know what the author meant and you can continue to try to insult me, but neither one is going to change the fact that the author was not supporting rape.

The fact. The fact you have pulled out of your ass. Just because you say something, big daddy, does not make it so. Most people learn this when they are five. Everyone else has been pointing out why they thought it was rape, and pulling the relevant parts of the text. All you have is your gut feeling that the girl was secretly playing at it and didn’t tell anyone, while they guy magically realized this.

You’re a rape apologist. Own it, and get the fuck out.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

I notice the latest rape apologist doesn’t come in here with anything to support his claim. No, it’s all assertions that “she’s not really a virgin!” and “she’s not really afraid and pushing him away!” with not even a quotation or link to the article to back it up. That, plus his whole attitude – oh, it’s so laughable that anyone should be concerned about rape – says quite enough about him. In one word: shitstain.

Ugh
Ugh
11 years ago

She usuallysits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary.

Again, if you’re at the point that the only reason you’re not doing a sex act is because a woman is PHYSICALLY PREVENTING you from doing it, you’re a rapist.

This is not rocket science.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

Ninjaed with style by Marie!

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