So “dating” guru Roosh has a post up on his Return of Kings blog by another self-professed dating guru, Alex Matlock, who rates various types of “bad sex” according to the type of female partner who’s involved in them, including such charmingly named types as “The one that tries too much (aka The Disaster)” and “The one that doesn’t move (aka The Starfish or The Doll).”
I expected a good deal of standard-issue manosphere misogyny in Matlock’s list, but I honestly couldn’t make it past his description of what he regards as the second-worst type of female sex partner: “The one that’s scared (aka The Virgin).” Because what he’s describing doesn’t sound so much like “bad sex” as “date rape.”
[TRIGGER WARNING for what follows; emphasis mine.]
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This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usually sits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.
Uh, Mr. Matlock, I’m hoping for everyone’s sake that this is a hypothetical “humorous” scenario you’ve come up with for the sake of this article and not something you’ve been a part of in the actual real world on a regular basis, because, unless you’ve left out that portion of the hypothetical events in which the woman in question clearly and unequivocally consents to having sex with your hypothetical protagonist here, what you’ve just described as “bad sex” (for the hypothetical dude) is actually a description of, well, rape from the point of view of the rapist.
In which case that twinge of guilt your hypothetical protagonist hypothetically feels is probably just the tiny part of his hypothetical self that’s still human reacting to the fact that he JUST (hypothetically) FUCKING RAPED SOMEONE.
MRAs and PUAs and manospherean assholes generally like to pretend that consent is some weird and mysterious thing, but it’s really not. Here’s a hint: if a women looks at you with fear in her eyes and pushes you away all while sitting in a position that makes sex difficult …. all that means NO.
The fact that Matlock — despite those twinges of guilt — still doesn’t regard this as the worst kind of “bad sex” (for the guy) but merely the second-worst adds a certain level of absurdity to the horror.
Given Roosh’s publication of this piece by Matlock, and the fact that he himself has already confessed to committing what would be considered date rape by American standards by having sex with at woman too inebriated to give consent, perhaps it’s time to stop referring to Roosh as a dating guru and to start referring to him as a date rape guru.
I don’t really have anything else to say.
Here, as brain bleach, are some cats with smaller versions of themselves:
And what trolls like PellFedora don’t understand is that, while we can easily go to 400 comments nomming on trolls, we can also go to 400 comments talking about pickles, PMS remedies, and Christian heavy metal. It’s kind of what we do here.
Re: pickles, since I’m procrastinating decorating cakes:
I like some pickles, but not others. I’m very picky about my pickles.
And we were going to have pretzels today but the can they came in exploded even though they said they’d be good till june 🙁 And i’m still craving pretzels
Manboobz: Come for the mockery, stay for the pickles.
The pickles of death.
The pickles that symbolize our futile struggle against entropy. Things fall apart and things break and time passes and take it from me, you’ll be lucky to be left with nothing but pickles at the end of the day. An endless supply of pickles to sustain you through your tribulations.
Suddenly I don’t feel so hip. My lack of zest will probably ruin my dating life. I’m going to go eat the cake I stored in the fridge for this occasion.
@Fibinachi
If you have pickled limes or lemons you can get your zest from them.
@cloudiah
Try listening to the original Earth Wind and Fire version. It’s much better.
Oh darn, I can’t blame Stryper for those lyrics. I’m sure EWF’s music is better, and I am definitely more forgiving of bad lyrics when the music is good. 😀
“Better trollz plz”
Ahh, you want me back!!!
I knew it 🙂 🙂
@hellkell I’m very sad that you don’t like cucumbers. *munches on a cucumber*
talacaris: you are no one’s idea of a better troll.
melody: no need to be sad, just don’t like ’em.
Note that Eurosobbra is touting, “the idea that a man’s, ‘No’ is an impossibility”.
Never mind that, in the real world, men say no all the time (and he has even explained why he thinks they might).
So we have more “benign” gaslighting, except that it’s not benign. He’s using it to set up his right to violate people’s boundaries.
Umm…there’s something missing from this Just So story. The idea that women evolved large breasts as a way to attract men to protect them from tigers doesn’t actually do anything to explain male attraction for large breasts.
Eurosabra: I think there are some people whose bodies are read such that they could not make that statement sound threatening
You think wrong. Even if there were someone who was so small, slight, crooked, what have you, this is a world with weapons; and there is no way to know such a person has no confederates.
MordsithJ: Fun fact: The salt in pickle juice is just for flavor, it’s the vinegar that preserves the cucumber.
Depends on the pickle. A brine pickle is made with salt and water. The acidity is a side effect of the bacterial fermentation which does the picking.
@Fedoradude: For your sickeningly entitled “social experiment” crap about triggers and trigger warnings, go step on all the legos you manage to find. Twice. You’d have to be severely lacking in empathy to view people with PTSD and other mental health issues as your very own experimental guinea pigs. It’s all real to them. They live with that shit every day, whereas you can just yawn, put on your fedora, and go about your daily life after your little experiment is done. You’d have to be a fucking monster to find such things even remotely entertaining.
I’m also getting the Jackie = The Black Fedora vibe, seeing as how he spent a considerable number of posts insisting that a random commenter writing such things proves that feminists are horrible people. But just to make it clear: No, a rapist’s looks don’t matter. At all. I don’t care if a rapist looks like a hunky cross between Johnny Depp and Viggo Mortensen. If he rapes people he is a reprehensible rapist. Based on his actions. You know, the things that he does.
That’s enough on that subject for now, though I am kinda sad he didn’t refer to my Troll to English translations as “parrot translations”. Last time that happened, when I was still new to commenting here, some regulars ran with it and started producing pirate-themed, steamy, sexy troll slash fiction. Me approve.
@Fade: Thank you, thank you! I’ll be here all night*!
*Actually, I won’t. Tomorrow is “return final version of final paper in order to finally receive my long overdue degree” day, so I will probably be double-checking whatever the hell I’ve been writing these past months.
Random, but my tumblr is turning into Margaret Atwood quotes……
I’ve been reading a lot and I keep finding poetic lines.
OBJECTION! Cucumbers can be eaten in many tasty ways, examples of which are in a salad, or fried with breading and dipped in marinera sauce. They are excellent with the breading, as it brings out their juiciness. Let us contemplate the juiciness.
Don’t forget tzatziki (with or without dill)
Radical Parrot, Good Luck!
Again, whether it is reasonable to discount it based on the utterer does not change the fact that from some people it is going to be discounted. Most of those people will also not be predators.
@pecunium
I can’t believe I forgot tzatziki! ::hangs head in shame:: And no dill here, I had a really bad knock-off that tasted only like dill and manoynaise, so dill in tzatziki is forever tainted in my mind.
@Eurosabra
I can’t tell if I’m following you anymore. Did you just say that most people saying ‘WRONG ANSWER’ to a no are not predators? Because if so, holey what the fuck.
Eurosabra: So… since some people might discount it, and decide it’s not a threat to them makes it ok to say to anyone?
Got any other subjects where that’s true… say hate speech? After all, some people might not be scared when someone says, “I want to kill me an ,’x’ because they are are all evil”, means it’s cool to say it to everyone?
You don’t get to decide that someone won’t be threatened by what you are saying. If it’s threatening, you have to take the heat for being a creepy bastard who threatens people.
That you say you’ve not said it… ok. That means you are bit less creepy to women you are hitting on than you are here.
We still get to call you a threatening, boundary ignoring (because we recall what you’ve said) creepy slimeball; because you are a threatening, boundary ignoring, creepy slimeball.
@Radical Parrot
Good luck!
No, I’m saying most people whose physical or social reading precludes their being perceived as a threat are also not predators, and there exist hypothetical and real utterers of that threat who would not be credible as a threat, should one’s overeaction become a penal matter. That said, I would never say that IRL because I have no wish to terrorize.
I have no fucking clue what Eurosabra just said.
Dafuq is this shit? PellFedora supports anything the SPLC has denounced, but has ignored all mention of that including, eg, the KKK. PellFedora can guess our ages and dating histories, but won’t when asked. PellFedora finds Roosh’s rapeyness the same as attempting to comfort a concerned lover (hint Pell, comforting =/= having sex with anyways).
Eurosabra was almost reasonable, and then dogged further into how he doesn’t complain a bout not getting laid to the women not fucking him, just us. And anyways, he’s not seen as a threat! Hint, neither am I, it’d still be beyond the pale to try forcing someone into fucking me (and, oh yeah, not looking like a threat =/= totally safe, if I have to I can hold my own, starting it, whether rape or a simple fight, is still failing “being a decent human being 101”)
But my actual reason for jumping into this foray? That last video on the previous page, once played it did, like all youtube, the “recommended videos” thing, and gave me this…
Holy fucking shit EA is fast.
Also Pecunium! You’re a plec! This explains so much! Armored, hard to get at physically unless a very tiny parasite or serious trauma, able to thrive in a wide variety of environments, and survive well enough in some that are simply not suited for
fishlife…And I corrupted zombie Marie! *cackles*