Categories
creepy irony alert men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny narcissism playing the victim PUA rape rape culture rhymes with roosh victim blaming

Dating guru Alex Matlock: Sex with women who fear you and push you away might not be much fun

sayingno
Protip: This does not mean “yes.”

So “dating” guru Roosh has a post up on his Return of Kings blog by another self-professed dating guru, Alex Matlock, who rates various types of “bad sex” according to the type of female partner who’s involved in them, including such charmingly named types as “The one that tries too much (aka The Disaster)” and “The one that doesn’t move (aka The Starfish or The Doll).”

I expected a good deal of standard-issue manosphere misogyny in Matlock’s list, but I honestly couldn’t make it past his description of what he regards as the second-worst type of female sex partner: “The one that’s scared (aka The Virgin).” Because what he’s describing doesn’t sound so much like “bad sex” as “date rape.”

[TRIGGER WARNING for what follows; emphasis mine.]
.
.
.
.

This girl doesn’t necessarily have to be a virgin because she can still act the part many years after she’s popped that priceless cherry. She will usually look at you with fear in her eyes as if she has no idea about what’s going to happen. She gently pushes you away as if she’s not ready for the event and when it does happen she continues to act like it’s the first time. She usually sits in some extremely awkward positions that make you give up and just go missionary. This girl will eventually bust your nut but she’ll surely leave you with a sense of disappointment and/or guilt.

Uh, Mr. Matlock, I’m hoping for everyone’s sake that this is a hypothetical “humorous” scenario you’ve come up with for the sake of this article and not something you’ve been a part of in the actual real world on a regular basis, because, unless you’ve left out that portion of the hypothetical events in which the woman in question clearly and unequivocally consents to having sex with your hypothetical protagonist here, what you’ve just described as “bad sex” (for the hypothetical dude) is actually a description of, well, rape from the point of view of the rapist.

In which case that twinge of guilt your hypothetical protagonist hypothetically feels is probably just the tiny part of his hypothetical self that’s still human reacting to the fact that he JUST (hypothetically) FUCKING RAPED SOMEONE.

MRAs and PUAs and manospherean assholes generally like to pretend that consent is some weird and mysterious thing, but it’s really not. Here’s a hint: if a women looks at you with fear in her eyes and pushes you away all while sitting in a position that makes sex difficult …. all that means NO.

The fact that Matlock — despite those twinges of guilt — still doesn’t regard this as the worst kind of “bad sex” (for the guy) but merely the second-worst adds a certain level of absurdity to the horror.

Given Roosh’s publication of this piece by Matlock, and the fact that he himself has already confessed to committing what would be considered date rape by American standards by having sex with at woman too inebriated to give consent, perhaps it’s time to stop referring to Roosh as a dating guru and to start referring to him as a date rape guru.

I don’t really have anything else to say.

Here, as brain bleach, are some cats with smaller versions of themselves:

df956eb3acbafb1eb405c55b6bfa4946

851 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
melody
11 years ago

@Aaliyah
The kind that make me think my insides are trying to crawl up my throat.
Seriously, I don’t think it has ever been this bad.

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
11 years ago

Melody

Well is it possible that a tendency to see evil intent in the targets of this blog might translate to men in your outside life? Switch on the TV and you see at least one rapist an hour- or a serial killer (always male).

Real life- not so much.

Most of the men targeted by this blog are simply a little socially inept. They are telling their personal truths because they are hurting and all of this pain would go if only someone would hear them- just once.

Hell.. if you are a feminist you have probably said worse things yourself yet I do not believe you are a danger to anyone.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

Dude, most of the men targeted by this blog are spousing misogyny. Even if they are socially inept, that doesn’t make their misogyny okay.

melody
11 years ago

Fedora you don’t think guys who think they should be able to force women to have abortions are a problem?
You don’t think men that perpetuate and sometimes admit to rape are a problem?
You don’t think men who think women owe him sex are a problem?

You and I have very different opinions of what is a problem.

Marie
11 years ago

Well is it possible that a tendency to see evil intent in the targets of this blog might translate to men in your outside life? Switch on the TV and you see at least one rapist an hour- or a serial killer (always male).

Real life- not so much.

Most rapists are male. And I’d love to see less female victims so…point not made. You also have plenty of men in positive roles (catching the rapists) and women tend to be cast as victims (some in good roles but not as many).

Hell.. if you are a feminist you have probably said worse things yourself yet I do not believe you are a danger to anyone.

If you are a feminist, you have probably said worse things, which I won’t quote for some reason.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Yay, a new troll (I thought)! And then it became obvious that he was not new at all. Still, a few points.

1. Invisibility is a superpower. Can you walk into a jewelry store and steal things because none of the staff can see you, and neither can the security cameras? No? Then you’re not invisible.

2. Lots of sex (for either men or women) lessens empathy? What a sad, strange idea.

3. “In fact the woman always leads but she does so subtly. ” It’s particularly funny that he would bring this up, since one of the problems with PUA is that it teaches men to approach even when women are not giving them any signals of interest at all. It’s one of the reasons why their failure rate is so high.

4. Was it Steele who shortened people’s names in odd ways?

5. When Eurosabra is making more sense than you then you may have overdone your troll persona a bit.

melody
11 years ago

Hell.. if you are a feminist you have probably said worse things yourself yet I do not believe you are a danger to anyone.

Agreed. Which things have I said that are worse? Have a threatened to rape or kill anybody? No. Have a threatened to dox anybody? No. Have raped, killed or doxxed anybody? No. In fact I think I’ve been pretty civil through our entire interaction.

However, this is my life. I live it every day. I have to deal with things that you don’t. My examples about the attention we get earlier have happen to me. I take this seriously because these things effect me. This isn’t a scientific experiment for me.

melody
11 years ago

oops….lost some of the blockquote.
I was trying to post Marie.

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
11 years ago

Fade. You have said things while in pain. So have I. Fortunately we did not write them down.

What I object to is the way people are quote mined and then seemingly willfully misinterpreted. This is why I find myself supporting guys like Roosh who probably lead many men up the garden path. He has made his life about the search for an impossible romantic ideal and yet he can never find her- because the search is the thing and not the finding.

He also espouses dangerous sex in third world countries and tells men this is nothing to worry about. All wrong and stupid BUT I will not have lies told to support the feminist notion that there is something fundamentally wrong with all men.

Aaliyah
11 years ago

Well is it possible that a tendency to see evil intent in the targets of this blog might translate to men in your outside life? Switch on the TV and you see at least one rapist an hour- or a serial killer (always male).

Possible? A lot of things are possible. Is that actually the case, though? Nope.

You are just terrible. Please go away.

Aaliyah
11 years ago

All wrong and stupid BUT I will not have lies told to support the feminist notion that there is something fundamentally wrong with all men.

Fuck off with your straw men.

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
11 years ago

Yay! I have trolled to 400 posts. Time to call it a day. Goodnight all!

Eurosabra
Eurosabra
11 years ago

Fade,
i don’t know why it would be a personal issue for you, unless you also feel that chronic illness means that your dating life is compromised such that *almost everyone* is privileged relative to you, that “No” is a show-stopper, a let-down, a bummer *AND* means that you’ll have to “take a breather” in your dating life sufficient that your other dating opportunities temporarily fade away as you gather strength and recover, since the other people who might have said “Yes” won’t wait for you. Really, I don’t see why anyone cares, since it’s been made sufficiently clear to me that I don’t have any power, social or discursive, and I encourage you to return the issue to the silence that other people have so diligently pressed on me.

melody
11 years ago

Thank you.
Bye.

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

Fade. You have said things while in pain. So have I. Fortunately we did not write them down.

So if I said “women vote the wrong way” and acted like women shouldn’t have the right to vote, it’s okay because I’m in pain.

Newsflash: I have said some things while in pain (though not racist, sexist things). I did apologize afterwards, because you being in pain doesn’t absolve your words of consequences.

You inexplicably think that it’s okay for Roosh to post something from a man likes to have sex with women without their consent (what do you think “pushing away” or “eyes widen in fear” means?) The fact that you support someone who posts and encourages that behavior makes me sick.

Your abuse-apologia is showing. It does not matter if all the MRAs are magically in pain at the same time and keep expousing their misogyny due to their pain. Their actions still have consequences; their words have consequences, and they encourage abuse and rape verbally.

pecunium
11 years ago

Blacky: When did “shy” = “minor mental health problem”?, and when did anyone here mock someone for being shy (as opposed to the question of them being, yanno, a rapist)?

You believe (I think)

Assumes facts not in evidence.

Well is it possible that a tendency to see women as things who are possessed of convenient backstories which makes raping them a noble sacrifice (since the dude won’t have quite the good time he might otherwise) is why we think you are about as worthwhile as that half a bottle of cheap beer people used for disposing of their cigarette butts.

Most of the men targeted by this blog are simply a little socially inept.

Socially inept, like guys who advocate “Rape Game”, or the subject of the OP who says rape isn’t quite the most boring sex he’s had.

Or the guys who think girls need to be hit. Or the guys who think that children should be left to starve, or that women should be forced to get abortions (or have children) if the dude says so.

Or the one’s who say women don’t deserve to vote. Or that any women who don’t, “save it for marriage,” are whores, and ought to be sent to brothels.

That sort of socially inept?

If that’s the case, I’d say they deserve to be targetted.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

@ Aaliyah

What’s a French silk pie?

@ Melody

For cramps the thing that works for me when nothing else does is cramp bark. You can get it at health food stores in the herbal medicine section, as a strong decoction that you put a few drops of in water or tea. Works far better than Midol and similar meds in my case, and without any side effects. Is there anyone around who can run over to the store for you?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

In terms of teas for cramps raspberry leaf is the best. I think Traditional Medicinals makes one, or you can just make your own with the loose leaf stuff. My local herbalist mixes it with mint leaves to make a tea that helps with both cramps and nausea.

pecunium
11 years ago

Blacky: . All wrong and stupid BUT I will not have lies told to support the feminist notion that there is something fundamentally wrong with all men.

Instead you will tell lies about how feminists think there is something wrong with all men; and you will defend a guy who admits to committing rape (and advocates how to commit rape), as being maligned because quoting him is somehow unfair.

Eurosabra
Eurosabra
11 years ago

Seconding the French silk pie (raises spoon.)

Fade
Fade
11 years ago

Fade,
i don’t know why it would be a personal issue for you, unless you also feel that chronic illness means that your dating life is compromised such that *almost everyone* is privileged relative to you, that “No” is a show-stopper, a let-down, a bummer *AND* means that you’ll have to “take a breather” in your dating life sufficient that your other dating opportunities temporarily fade away as you gather strength and recover, since the other people who might have said “Yes” won’t wait for you. Really, I don’t see why anyone cares, since it’s been made sufficiently clear to me that I don’t have any power, social or discursive, and I encourage you to return the issue to the silence that other people have so diligently pressed on me.

I don’t like people using chronic illness as an excuse for women not to say no*. It’s personal for me because a) I’m a woman, and b) I have a chronic illness.

*That’s what it seemed like you were saying earlier (when you said when a woman said no at the end, you wanted to scream “WRONG ANSWER”). here if you’ve forgotten.

Marie
11 years ago

Wow this thread exploded while I was getting dished ready for more cakes

@black fedora

Fade. You have said things while in pain. So have I. Fortunately we did not write them down.

I see you’ve taken the ‘everyone is a shitty human being, others just hide it better’.

What I object to is the way people are quote mined and then seemingly willfully misinterpreted.

all the projection.

. This is why I find myself supporting guys like Roosh who probably lead many men up the garden path

“garden path”? The fuck? Also, Roosh pretty much wrote about raping someone up there. You support him. What does this say about you?

melody
11 years ago

@CassandraSays I have to wait 2 hours because my friend doesn’t get off work until then 🙁
She’ll get me what I need though. She is awesome. She was going to ask her bf to pick stuff up, but I told her no. lol Her bf is nice, but it would be awkward for us both if he came.

Besides if she comes she will stay awhile and help out. Anything that helps with pain+nausea is great.

I think I should see a gynecologist about this though. I feel like the cramps have been getting worse month after month.

The Black Fedora
The Black Fedora
11 years ago

OK you got me back. The post was not by Roosh. It was on his blog but he did not write it. Furthermore I only support Roosh when he is misrepresented. Presumably I will now be accused on the basis that ‘only a witch will defend a witch’.

pecunium
11 years ago

Blacky: So, on what specific points do you support Roosh?

1 15 16 17 18 19 35