I was a little saddened to read recently that A Voice for Men — the self-proclaimed “Men’s Human Rights” site that has posted an open call to firebomb government buildings in its “activism” section — will no longer be writing about little old me.
Yes, it’s true. In a recent post announcing that he would no longer be writing or caring about journalist Arthur Goldwag, who famously took on the misogyny of the Men’s Rights movement in a piece for the Southern Poverty Law Center, AVFM’s head douchebag Paul Elam also noted that he would no longer be writing or caring about me either.
“In the early days of this site, we used to write a fair amount about David Futrelle,” Elam wrote. “He was a nice, soft target; pudgy actually.”
But now, apparently, AVFM has gotten much too important to bother with soft, pudgy nobodies like me or Goldwag or the SPLC.
We don’t mention David anymore except as a passing joke. He is just another low-end blogger with a small audience of neurotic women who talk more about cats in his comments than what he writes. It is as close to physical intimacy as the guy will ever get.
It’s a little strange how much time Elam, a fiftysomething straight man, spends thinking about my sex life, but I suppose it will be a bit of a relief not to have to read so many of these fantasies of his in the pages of AVFM. Not to mention Elam’s bizarre conspiracy theories about me — like this one. (I wonder why Elam never came forward with the proof of those allegations like he promised he would? Hmm.)
So I was a little surprised when, only one day after Elam bid me that not-very-fond farewell, AVFM’s “managing editor” Dean Esmay decided to set forth yet another conspiracy theory about me and my alleged army of evil minions.
In the midst of a long, weird, barely coherent tirade directed at a writer for Vice magazine who’d approached AVFM with some questions for its stable of female MRAs, Esmay accused my evil minions (in advance) of writing to the Viceman pretending to be female MRAs in an attempt to make female MRAs look bad:
[M]aybe … one of David Futrelle’s minions will show up in your inbox and say “yeah I’m a female MRA and I support taking rights away from women and I hate women too because we women suck, put women who have abortions in prison praise jesus blargh!” and so on and so forth, because that’s just what a whole lot of people who oppose compassion and fundamental human rights for boys and men do: pretend to be MRAs or to be quoting MRAs just to make us look bad. We’ve seen it in action more than once. At least one asshole we know of pretty much does it as a full-time gig.
Dude, I hate to break it to you, but none of my “minions” needs to pretend to be a female MRA in order to make female MRAs look bad. Female MRAs like JudgyBitch and GirlWritesWhat and TyphonBlue are already doing an exemplary job of that already. I mean, seriously, did you read JudgyBitch’s thing about pedophilia the other day? I mean, wow.
Of course male MRAs are also doing a fantastic job making themselves look terrible as well, from Warren Farrell on down to that dude who thinks “friend zoning” should be punishable by law (and the dozens of Men’s Rights Redditors who upvoted him).
But, really, no single website has done more to make the Men’s Rights movement look terrible than A Voice for Men.
Seriously, fellas (and FeMRAs), take a bow. We here at Man Boobz couldn’t do it without you. I couldn’t make up the shit you spew if I tried. (And, for the record, I don’t try.)
ATTENTION-WAY AN-MAY OOBZ-BAY INIONS-MAY: I-way am-way alling-cay off-way our-way evious-day an-play o-tay impersonate-way emale-fay As-mRAY. Ean-day Esmay-way as-hay igured-fay it-way out-way. Ease-play eturn-ray o-tay alsely-fay accusing-way apless-hay etas-bay until-way urther-fay otice-nay. And-way on’t-day orget-fay o-tay eed-fay e-thay ats-cay.
If we’re just going for music + hilarious rather than specifically Eurovision, this is the most hilarious band of all time (that made videos, anyway). Please don’t kill me, visual fangirls…but come on, the music is fucking terrible and one of the guys floats down from the sky with giant monster feet on, and then another guy draws a pentagram on the screen while wearing a wizard hat. How anyone interprets this as totes serious is a mystery to me.
@cloudiah Happy to be of service, in a totally humorless and misandrist way! All hail the matriarchy! Power to the Hive Mind!!
And with that, I have finished hydrating and will now collect my kitties and head off to bed! Nighty night, all!
That is the greatest music video of all time, by which I mean the most fantastically terrible music video of all time.
Thank you, CassandraSays. Those feet will haunt me for all time, but in a good way.
Oh wow. Have never heard of Thomas Higginson, and have now ordered books by him and Sojourner Truth, also a reader with Suffragette era essays.
Thanks!!
Night, gillyrosebee!
I may be up for a while, decompressing from various hospital visits. Terrible music videos are a great help, oddly enough.
Maybe I’ll go check out r/mr, since that is usually a good way to take my mind off of actually important things, like life or death. They had something on there about dudes not being allowed to wear tank tops that made me laugh this morning…
Oh, I know why certain people* prefer the first wave feminists. They wanted the vote, and part of their argument was ye olde essentialiste women are the centre of the family, moral backbone of society. When we vote, get into parliament, participate in democracy, w/e, the world will be a better place because of our pure womanly motives.
Tom and his friends think the first wave had it right. It’s OK for women to vote. It’s even more OK for them to concentrate on keeping a clean house and raising obedient children and elevating private and social discourse on “suitable” topics. Like prohibition? Look how well that turned out. Women’s policies about social problems can be just as wrong-headed as men’s.
*for want of a more accurate term. People-who-aren’t-worth-considering-as-people is a bit longwinded.
As for the is it or is it not a sock? It’s a bit like the old argument about some people who claim 20 years experience in something – but who’ve actually had one year’s experience 20 times. It’s not a good analogy, but it’s OK. In the end, we really can’t tell and care even less whether it’s one clown returning 30 times or 30 separate clowns arriving with the same tired routines. Nobody laughed the first time. Repeating it a hundred times just makes it irritating on top of being unfunny.
..? Plz explain.
No, it’s not a joke. I’m not suggesting he’s gay. I don’t think he is gay. I find it strange that a man of his age is so obsessed with my sex life, or with asserting that I don’t have one. It seems rather childish.
Cloudiah, do you remember this Eurovision gem?
I had forgotten that German gem. I need glasses with yellow lenses
CassandraSays, it was something about some private school that allowed girls to wear tank tops and boys couldn’t, and that was like genocide or something.
This just in – sleeves kill.
By the way, this is Day 6 of no Cat Anger Consequences of my 2 week going-away-and-leaving-them-in-a-boarding-facility experiment.
How long before they kill me in my sleep?
(Buster is right now drooling on my right arm. No doubt plotting my demise.)
And now I am going to sleep, finally lulled into slumber by Eurovision videos (and their non-Euro like). So thanks, manboobzers!
This is going to be stuck in my head for the next few days. X_X
Night, Cloudiah! ^_^
BTW on the forum I linked to before, GGG shows up on page 5 under the name Strychnine. Apparently he was the Mr Al of that forum.
Fuck, I just spent the entire day avoiding TV and internet as we get a delayed Eurovision broadcast here
I do a sneaky MBZ check and, gah, I wuz AMBUSHED!
I think I averted my eyes in time.
My mum and dad are coming out in August to live here for a year. This means instead of email conversations about Eurovision, we can go the whole hog…naff snacks, competitions and booze
I miss Terry Wogan though
The only reason I’d ever pretend to be a FeMRA is if we did some live action series of A Voice for Pierre, and for some reason, you ask me, a rather tall, college-aged man to play a FeMRA.
@Cthulhu
Wouldn’t that be the ultimate meta machiavellian plan? We get you, rather tall college aged man to play a FeMRA. Since we’ll be so stealth, it will look like a powerful action to end men’s oppression against the gynocracy within the MRM (to prove how gynocratic our world is, my computer is telling me that it’s *not a word*.
But then, BAM! you swing your cape around and everyone understand that it was a manboobz operation all along, sending a man to infiltrate the group of women who infiltrated the MRM… On behalf of a feminist website ran by a feminist man being infiltrated by women and cats that you infiltrate as a man in order to gain power in your mission.
You may then pose as a double agent, but you’ll really be a triple agent.
When you are done, it will be otter chaos.
…But then I reveal that I’ve been an MRA all along, but then word gets out that I was pretending to be an MRA pretending to be a tall college-aged male feminist pretending to be a FeMRA trying to infiltrate the MRM on behalf of a feminist website being infiltrated by women and cats. At some point in that, I’m obviously MRAL somewhere (because references to him when socking are mandatory). But then, NO. I’m not any of those! I am actually a psychotic blue cat with a taste for flesh. My profile image is a self portrait.
…I confused myself at some point. around there. Some double reverse quadruple agenting. God, I need to make a chart or something.
@cloudiah – “(Buster is right now drooling on my right arm. No doubt plotting my demise.)”
You don’t know about the Slow Acting Venomous Cat Drool, do you?
If we’re going to have a live-action Pierre comic, who gets to play Pierre? This is vital!
Not caught up! Ahh! Anyways.
“Charlotte Perkins Gilman (especially The Yellow Wallpaper)”
Yes, read that! It’s available here — http://www.library.csi.cuny.edu/dept/history/lavender/wallpaper.html
So Paul Elam is…oh look at the adorable kitty!
*cough* “We need to emphasize that, for PR purposes if nothing else.” Like the Catholics and the Mormons working together to stop same-sex marriage! oh yay (deadpan)
Hey! No dissing Lordi. I like Lordi.