Hey fellas! While we’re talking about the evils of the Friend Zone and possible legal sanctions against the women who so often and so maliciously put us there — and while the women are distracted by that picture of Scrooge McDuck above — I’d like to warn you of another kind of Friend Zone you need to be wary of: the “Repair Friend” Zone.
I learned of this danger from none other than Warren Farrell himself, in the pages of his book Women Can’t Hear What Men Don’t Say (which amazingly does not have the subtitle “But It’s Not Like Angry Dudes On The Internet Are Going to Shut Up Any Time Soon”).
Here’s how old Warren explains it, perhaps exaggerating the innocence of the wily female Repair-Friend Zoners:
Single moms who rely on male friends for repairs — “he’s just a repair friend” — are often unaware that the man really isn’t sacrificing his Sunday afternoon in exchange for a Sunday night dinner. The truth is, if he’s making that type of sacrifice, it’s usually because he’s interested in her.
That’s right, ladies! Men never actually want to be just friends with you. Never. And when they act friendly, it’s just because they want to [insert weird creepy Warren Farrellesque euphemism for sex here]. Only instead of making a move on you they’d rather make a move on your car, and just sort of hope you’ll get the hint.
I’ve seen many single moms who have men who they claim are “just friends” work on their cars, do repairs, help them move. They think nothing of it. (Which says it all.) When she starts dating someone seriously, the “repair friend” feels hurt and her new boyfriend feels suspicious. And Mom feels caught between a rock and a hard place, so to speak.
Is Farrell making some sort of awkward boner joke here?
Anyway, for Farrell, this is somehow all the fault of women, and feminism, or misandry, or something.
This attitude rests on a deeper foundation. Just as women who are poor turn to the government as a substitute husband (in the form of welfare and AFDC payments), so women without husbands often unconsciously turn to substitute husbands, such as dads, “repair friends,”and male neighbors.
So, fellas, be careful out there. One moment you’ll be chatting casually over the fence with the former Mrs. Jones, and the next thing you know you’ll be in her basement buried deep in her washing machine trying to fix, I dunno, whatever is inside of washing machines that might need fixing, I’m not really very mechanical.
Come to think of it a female friend of mine had me change a light bulb the other day that she couldn’t reach. Granted, I don’t want to have sex with her, and also she’s fixed my bike on several occasions and sometimes brings me cake, but, still, I think I may have just been Light Bulb Friend Zoned.
I would be happy to call you Guinea Pig Girl if I can remember, Marie.
Bud, we are not now nor ever will be Cool. Nor kewel neither.
Ooh look, Budmin thinks he’s being cutting. Sorry fella, you’re about as cutting as used toilet paper.
Let’s see, furbabies! Here’s Maddie in her pink placcie bag:
http://youtu.be/JHRkORgGJ3E
If course, he works with Dr Pell, or is perhaps Dr Pell.
Invasion of the typo monster, otherwise known as Chickapea.
Hmmm. I remain confused. My comment was naive, and also MGTOW exist? What is the connection? Yes, a tiny group of men has a stupid generalization about the world… that was what I was saying. Where is the naive?
I am delicate, in some ways! You seem to be implying something in that statement, though, or else you wouldn`t have brought it up. What matters about being delicate?
For instance, I think you are delicate, but that is related to this discussion. See, there is a word for the emotion that happens when you want something and then don’t get it: disappointment. Disappointment is completely all you’rs talking about… you have no other subject. Yes, it is disappointing to be attracted to a woman and she doesn’t reciprocate.
And yeah, disappointment sucks. But, you DEAL. You would have to be very brittle to desperately construct an entire sociological system where your personal disappointment is at the heart of how people behave.
I notice that Budmin’s attempts to come across as a sad confused fellow who wants dialogue only lasted for one post. In this one, he’s shown himself to be a bog-standard misogynist troll, either drunk posting or in dire need of remedial English classes, and trotting out all the usual garbage. It’s hard to tell who he hates more, women or other men; or rather, it’s hard to tell who he has a lower opinion of.
I’m also starting to get a whiff of sock.
Oh, ice burn, Budmin. Got any more weaksauce insults?
I imagine any music sounding off Budmin would be more like this:
It’s from an experimental orchestra where the musicians randomly traded instruments and did their best. I think it’s a pretty fitting theme for all of the MRM, actually.
But has anyone here considered the problem of the “save from killer dolls” friend zone?
Think about all the men who probably rescued women from killer dolls and then DIDN’T get to have sex with Jane Fonda!
I’m getting a Look from Maddie. Does this mean I’m about to face Cat Anger Consequences?
That’s far more alarming than any attempted insults by BonerWhiner Bud & co.
Kittehs, at the risk of arguing with you, I think that Maddie totally rocks the pink.
Of course, she’s a darling to begin with, so that helps.
You’ve been brainwashed by the cat! I see it all! 😀
That video’s not accurate for colour – it’s a really hot pink – but I shan’t argue.
Especially since I gave Madam a cuddle just before and she managed to log me out of my computer. 😛
Cat Anger Consequences are a thing.
…….
Why does Budmin think that was a burn? Just because Budmin would marry kitten doesn’t mean the Budmin represents the wants and likes of all men. Furthermore, Budmin know nothing about kitten except for what a few internet comments back and forth tell him. Which isn’t much.
Cat Anger Consequences are totally a thing. One underestimates the cats at one’s peril!
@Melody – if Budbrainless has read enough comments here he knows that I (like a good many of our regulars) am in a very happy relationship, and that probably pisses him off more than anything.
BTW your new kitty avatar is adorable. 🙂
He seems to consider himself industrial strength cool, or should I say Cool, and it just won’t come through on the comment thread, poor d00d.
All he is is a Budding imbecile.
I still want to know what I said that was so terribly, horribly, offensively naughty that it got poor Minnieboo’s knickers in such a twist.
I’ve been rejected before. It was sad, but I didn’t hold it against the guy who rejected me. We still hung out and were friends
I rejected someone before, and he harrassed me for the rest of the school year.
When you are rejected, it’s over then. People don’t normally go around harrassing you for asking them out. But some men (and some women I think? Idk, it normally happens more with men), ESPECIALLY some guys who think favors = sex, do not let a no be a no. They keep persisting or turn nasty once you say something they don’t like.
One of these things is over in an instant and one is not.
So I’ll say, yeah, men have these burdens or w/e, but women also have the burden of men not listening to their no, so…
also, i’m not even sure if you know what heteronormative and cis centered mean. Most people who use those words know that the patriarchy is a thing, and it is not the worst thing in the world to do favors for people
So… supposedly you can acknowledge gender roles, yet now you are using gender essentialism (guys do this based on gender) in your argument.
And you say “This group for equality is invalidated because a member of it did something I don’t like”
You do obviously not know what you’re talking about.
Anyone betting countdown to meltdown…?
Original. No one has ever, in the history of the patriarchy, insulted a woman by insinuating that she is not relationship material. Truly your wit is one of a kind guy humor possessed by none other.
Also, is Minnieboo budmin or did I get confused?
“Jyeah!”
I’m confused. When did we get in a time machine and get out in the middle of Wayne’s World?
Dear lord! If only I had known I could find some guy to do all this stuff!?! Usually it’s men calling me in the middle of the night to fix a burst pipe or a burning light socket. City guys don’t really like, fix stuff any more… do they???
@Budmin
Curse you, Blockquote Monster! CUUUUUURRRSEEE YOOOUUUU!!!!eleventy!!!!
Yep, that’s my fault, sorry. I was talking about Budmin there.
ah, so is it a new troll nickname? XD