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off topic open thread

Open Thread for Personal Stuff

Hugs for everyone who wants them.
Hugs for everyone who wants them.

I know a lot of Man Boobz regulars have been dealing with a lot of rough stuff lately, so I’m opening this thread up to provide a (relatively) safe space to discuss them. No trolls allowed; any trolls who post here will be put on moderation and possibly banned. (Please notify me by email (my last name at well dot com) if there are inaproppriate comments; I get behind in reading comments here.)

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Kittehserf
7 years ago

I’d quite forgotten I have an account with the yarn makers!

Try this link at Ravelry instead:

http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/jacket-deconstructed

rahu
rahu
7 years ago

Aaliyah – fwiw I was in almost the exact same situation as you with your stalkerish friend. To the extent that, for quite a while just now, catching up on the posts, I thought it might be the same person (it’s not – I noticed a couple of details that are different). I TOTALLY get what you mean by the guilt of not being there whenever she wants you-ALL of that, but I cannot stress enough that Argenti Aertheri and Kittehserf are giving you some MASSIVELY good advice. It took my (very good) therapist months to explain to me, about my friend, what they have been telling you about yours.

One thing to add – I can’t tell (obviously) from just your comments, but there is a good chance that she might have Borderline Personality. Whether she does or not, I recommend the book “Stop Walking on Eggshells” http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B004DNXGFQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1371066569&sr=1-1&pi=SL75. Whether she has it or not, this is a good book to read to help you.

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

Sorry guys, I didn’t know where to put this so I’m going to necro this thread. There’s some heavy flooding in my part of the world now (nothing catastrophic, very few people have been hurt, but it’s pretty unheard of for the area) and I hope Halite and leftwingfox and any of our other Alberta MBzers are safe and dry and have a place to stay if they’ve been evacuated.

cloudiah
7 years ago

Glad you’re okay, Viscaria. I think we’ve heard from everyone except Halite. Hey Halite, if you see this, please check in!

cloudiah
7 years ago

Nah, I don’t care about credit. Inurashii did the other one, I think.

Aaliyah
7 years ago

Aaliyah – fwiw I was in almost the exact same situation as you with your stalkerish friend. To the extent that, for quite a while just now, catching up on the posts, I thought it might be the same person (it’s not – I noticed a couple of details that are different). I TOTALLY get what you mean by the guilt of not being there whenever she wants you-ALL of that, but I cannot stress enough that Argenti Aertheri and Kittehserf are giving you some MASSIVELY good advice. It took my (very good) therapist months to explain to me, about my friend, what they have been telling you about yours.

One thing to add – I can’t tell (obviously) from just your comments, but there is a good chance that she might have Borderline Personality. Whether she does or not, I recommend the book “Stop Walking on Eggshells” http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B004DNXGFQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1371066569&sr=1-1&pi=SL75. Whether she has it or not, this is a good book to read to help you.

Borderline personality disorder? Perhaps. She certainly is very anxious about the idea of people abandoning her.

Speaking of her, I just saw her post an image on Facebook with the typical TERF definitions of sex and gender. That’s nice. >_>

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

Things are getting pretty bad >.> I hope the rain lets up soon. The north and south sides of the city have become completely isolated. I’ve never experienced this. Canmore is even worse than here.

For ourselves, we’ve been pretty lucky. Bf’s place is far away from the river, as is mine — although I can’t actually get there to see for sure that it’s not flooded. It’s probably fine.

My family are all okay. My uncle and his fiancée were displaced twice, but now they’re with my parents out of danger. We do have some friends that drove out of town yesterday. They reached their destination safely, but it’s unclear when they’ll be able to come back.

augochlorella
augochlorella
7 years ago

I hope everyone in Alberta is doing okay. Floods are poopy.

I feel bad because people have posted here with much bigger problems than mine, but I’ve been having some difficulty with my living situation lately and it’s been causing me a lot of stress.

I’m living with my mom before I go back to my last year of college as an undergrad in the fall. I had some misgivings about moving back in, and it looks like I was right to. My mother’s been very emotionally unstable since she and dad divorced about six years ago, and I’m constantly having to tip-toe around her. My siblings and I literally plan our lives around her work schedule so that we can try not to be home when she is.

Just now she caught me in the kitchen and told me I was scaring her because I remind her of dad, accused me of not grieving grandma (because I hadn’t cried in front of her), and said that I was treating my boyfriend the same way dad treated her – all because I told her I was uncomfortable with her complaining about her weight in front of me. (Not that it matters, but for the record she’s gorgeous and not overweight by anyone’s standards.)

I guess it doesn’t help that I’ve been standing up to some of her backwards ideas more often (No, mom, Islam is a religion, not a sex cult. No, mom, just because Brother is twenty and hasn’t been on a date doesn’t mean he’s not a real man.) but having to listen to her spout her sexist and racist arblegarble has also been weighing me down.

It’s just been really emotionally taxing and exhausting for me, and I’m not looking forward to two more months of this.

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
7 years ago

@augochlorella, that really sucks. Having that kind of stress at home is just draining. I hope you find some good hideouts over the summer. Also, not to bring you down more, but make sure your finances and possessions are secure, and you have an escape plan in place if necessary. It could be she’s just an asshole, but I’ve seen them morph into vicious, punitive assholes, so be careful.

augochlorella
augochlorella
7 years ago

Thanks. I’ve got pretty good hideouts for most of the week, but I’m stuck on Saturday and Sunday.

And yes, I don’t think it’ll come to a point where I’ll have to move out before I go back to college, but I do have an escape plan if things take a turn. Possessions might be a problem, but my finances are secure.

cloudiah
7 years ago

So, rhetorical question here, but is it possible that 2013 can go one month without being terrible to my friends? My best friend had a heart attack* today. He’s going to be fine, looks like, but I am beginning to feel like I am the terrible common denominator** connecting friends who are getting cancer/losing the ability to walk, having heart attacks***, and losing their beloved pets to coyotes and I should just hide myself away so that bad things don’t keep happening to people I care about.

I know probably everyone’s asleep; I’m just venting, and I’m okay really but if anyone is up and has cute animal videos I’m just saying it would be okay to share them here right now.

*Seriously, if you have severe pain and numbness in your left arm accompanied by copious vomiting, get thee to thy phone and call 911, don’t suffer in silence and wait until the next day to email your doctor — only to be told, CALL 911 NOW WHY ARE YOU EMAILING ME IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAD A HEART ATTACK.

**I know this is superstitious nonsense, but when terrible things seem to be happening to your friends every fucking month it kind of messes with your head.

*** Have we heard anything more from Bad_dog? Hir best friend also had a heart attack and open heart surgery, and I am hoping they are both doing okay.

Kittehserf
7 years ago

cloudiah, ALL THE HUGS for you and your friends!

http://youtu.be/EY-uM56BSrY

cloudiah
7 years ago

I was going to say that the last shot in the spaniels video was the cutest thing ever but then I saw the adorable GSDs abused by kittens and I think we have a tie.

Kittehs, you are the best. Thank you.

Kittehserf
7 years ago

Glad to help, cloudiah!

I’m off home now, but I’ll be on again in a coupla hours if you’re still up. Hopefully you’ll be sleeping soundly by then, and here’s extra hugs from me and the Mister to help you along.

((((cloudiah))))

Aaliyah
7 years ago

=[

Internet hugs if you want them, Cloudiah! Also, here’s a picture of our three cats: Peanut, Schopenhauer, and Sherkhan (my older siblings tend to pick amusing cat names)

http://i.imgur.com/UvaqrGw.jpg

MaudeLL
7 years ago

Cloudiah, I’m leaving a virtual hug over here if you want it. Take care of yourself, it sounds like harsh stuff.

MaudeLL
7 years ago

Cloudiah-
Tough love between a duck and a cat!

cloudiah
7 years ago

Hugs and cat pix are very welcome, thanks. You guys are wonderful. And upside-down Schopenhauer is particularly adorable. 😀

Aaliyah
7 years ago

Oh, the little one who’s upside-down is Peanut (my bad for the misleading order of names =P). The one to the left of her is Schopenhauer and the one on the right of her is Sherkhan (named after the character of the same name from The Jungle Book).

cloudiah
7 years ago

They’re all adorable, but I just particularly adore upside-down cats.

Ducks too.

katz
7 years ago

Cloudiah, you helped me find a home for a kitty and helped your coworker find a kitty. Jussayin you seem to be a net positive for us (and the kitty).

Aaliyah
7 years ago

More upside-down kittiness:

http://i.imgur.com/UZjPczn.jpg

Also, obligatory kitty-in-a-sink photo:

http://i.imgur.com/EbjBiZ3.jpg

cloudiah
7 years ago

That is a cute kitty too. Did I mention that she brought her into work one day and I got to meet her? She crawled all over me. I am ALPHA ATTRACTING ALL THE PUSSY.

(And thanks, it’s been a difficult year so any small happy endings I can be part of are like ice cream.)

cloudiah
7 years ago

That was @katz, but @Aaliyah those are adorable upside-down and sink-bound kitties too.

Maybe the second half of 2013 will be awesome for cloudiah’s friends. Can we all take a moment to visualize this?

neuroticbeagle
neuroticbeagle
7 years ago
cloudiah
7 years ago

I am so needy; thank you for the kind words, videos, pictures, etc. Going to sleep now. You guys are the best.

Aaliyah
7 years ago

Sleep well! ^_^

Kittehserf
7 years ago

Okay, wordpress, why do you not want to post that link? Testing, testing …

Kittehserf
7 years ago

Well crap, the stupid spam filter or something is eating a link for a page of upside down cats.

MISCATRY!

Kittehserf
7 years ago

Bloody wordpress!

This is Mads a couple of years ago, not getting out of the way.

neuroticbeagle
neuroticbeagle
7 years ago

@Kittehs

Mads does not appear to be impressed with your inability to get out of her way.

Kittehserf
7 years ago

LOL that was Mum not getting out of her way. Same applies, though.

Her latest trick is playing musical chairs. She keeps deciding to try a new chair for her afternoon/night sleep, which means if we’re home, we all have to shift to accommodate. Plus, I have to guess where she wants to spend the night so I can put her tapestry bag* there. If I get it wrong, I get the Accusatory Look in the morning, even though she’s not exactly hard done by sleeping in an armchair with a sheepskin rug in it.

*Said tapestry bag was a present from my sister, as a knitting bag. It has part of a ball of wool and a paper bag in it and Mads took it over about a day after I got it. It is now Her Bed.

neuroticbeagle
neuroticbeagle
7 years ago

Of course. She owns ALL the chairs- except the hard ones. Man, woman- it does not matter, all humans are subservient to the Furrinati.

Kittehserf
7 years ago

And that’s real.

Kittehserf
7 years ago

OMG that is so going to be the scene when Louis makes our new chairs!

😀 😀 😀

Kittehserf
7 years ago

I”m so telling Mads that one. 😀

cloudiah
7 years ago

I forgot to tell you guys how wonderful you are. Saw friend in hospital today; he had two stents inserted, and he’s feeling pretty good. He’ll probably go home tomorrow, and a bunch of us are going to coddle him as much as he allows until he’s back to feeling like himself. At which point I will go back to insisting he pays for all my meals, of course.

Ally S
7 years ago

Yay for cloudiah’s friend! ^^

anadiomene122
anadiomene122
7 years ago

The fact that I’m not the only person who is fed up with man boobz and that there’s a place to come to point and laugh at the most ridiculous internet specimens is essential atm.

I’ve probably posted too much sarcastic nonsense on some of the serious threads but it really is cathartic.

Fibinachi
Fibinachi
7 years ago

Then all is well, and you are relieved of the bubbling bile in your soul.

That does mean it won’t boil over haphzardly and destroy someone. So that’s actually great.

Also, glad to hear about your friend cloudiah. Nice it’s all… sort of! working out.

I have no issues to complain about, most things are well. Except I chipped my tooth with a vodka bottle the other day.

Oh, and the existential dread and my own myopic inadaquacy bubbles over every now and again and rips and tears at the shattered thing I like to call my mind, but, hey, that’s sort of part and parcel of being a human, I’m told.

You’re all generally quite lovely, and aid me by laughing at things I find reprehensible. It’s great!