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The Myth of Warren Farrell: Farrell on Rape, Part One

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No book has had more influence over the Men’s Rights movement than Warren Farrell’s The Myth of Male Power. Published in 1993, in the heyday of the early 90s antifeminist backlash, it set the agenda for the Men’s Rights movement as it’s developed over the last two decades.  He’s the one who came up with the notions of “male disposability” and the “death professions.” He’s the one who got MRAs fixated on the issue of draft registration.

Indeed, so pervasive has his influence been that if you see an MRA making a dumb argument anywhere on the Internet, the chances are probably more than 50-50 that it originated in the pages of Farrell’s book. Despite its age, and its eccentricity, The Myth of Male Power is still the first book recommended to MRA newbies in the sidebar of the Men’s Rights subreddit, the most active MRA hangout online.

It’s a book that deserves a lot more attention than I have been giving it on this blog. Sure, I’ve written about Farrell’s strange and creepy notions about incest, as set forth in a notorious interview in Penthouse in the 1970s, and about his recent attempts to explain away these views. But I haven’t devoted any blog posts to his most influential work. I intend to rectify that now, with a series of posts on some of Farrell’s chief arguments and assertions.

I will start with several posts on Farrell’s views on rape, which has been the subject of much controversy of late. This part will deal with his general statements on rape and sexuality; another will explore in more detail his views on date rape (did he really describe it as “exciting?”); and still another will look at the vast assortment of things he has inappropriately compared to rape.

Pinning down what Farrell “really believes” about rape – and indeed, about almost anything– is difficult. Farrell’s arguments, such as they are, are slippery and evasive. Instead of setting forth a clear argument about rape, Farrell instead provides us with a series of jumbled metaphors and strange comparisons. Instead of trying to summarize them – many of them defy summary — let’s just go through them one by one.

Farrell supporters will likely suggest that these quotes are taken “out of context,” to which I can only say: Check his book to see for yourself. None of his troubling quotes are any less troubling, or for that matter any clearer, in context, and many don’t have much of a context. Farrell writes in a rambling, free-associational style, and many of the “arguments” he makes in the following quotes seem to come from out of the blue, and are never developed further (though some, as you will see, are referenced again in later quotes).

Page numbers given are from the 1993 hardcover edition of The Myth of Male Power.

All that out of the way, let’s jump right in:

Near the start of his book , Farrell sets the tone for what will come by suggesting that men suffer as much sexual trauma from women’s mixed signals as women do from rape:

Feminism has taught women to sue men for sexual harassment or date rape when men initiate with the wrong person or with the wrong timing; no one has taught men to sue women for sexual trauma for saying “yes,” then “no,” then “yes.” … Men [are] still expected to initiate, but now, if they [do] it badly, they could go to jail. (p. 16)

Here, he elaborates on the notion that rape is a matter of bad timing, of “tak[ing] risks too quickly.”

In the past, both sexes were anxious about sex and pregnancy. Now the pill minimizes her anxiety and condoms increase his. Now the pimple faced boy must still risk rejection while also overcoming his own fear of herpes and AIDS and reassuring her there is nothing to fear. He must still do the sexual risk-taking, but now he can be put in jail if he takes risks too quickly or be called a wimp if he doesn’t take them quickly enough . (p. 168)

Here, Farrell falls back on the old “rape is misunderstanding” canard, and somehow manages to compare sexual activity –- from kissing up to and including rape — to eating a bag of potato chips.

It is also possible for a woman to go back to a man’s room, tell him she doesn’t want to have intercourse, mean it, start kissing, have intercourse, and then wish she hadn’t in the morning. How? Kissing is like eating potato chips. Before we know it, we’ve gone further than we said we would. (p. 311)

Here, he seems to seriously suggest that juries could do a better job judging rape cases if they were sexually aroused.

The problem with every judgment of sexual behavior is that it is made by people who aren’t being stimulated as they are making the judgment. A jury that sees a woman in a sterile courtroom, asks her what she wanted, and then assumes that anything else she did was the responsibility of the man is insulting not only the woman but the power of sex. (p. 312)

And then he returns to the potato chip metaphor.

A man being sued after a woman has more sex than intended is like Lay’s being sued after someone has more potato chips than intended. In brief, date rape can be a crime, a misunderstanding, or buyer’s remorse. (p. 312)

Farrell repeatedly tries to absolve men of sexual wrongdoing by suggesting that they are literally intoxicated by female beauty.

Sexually, of course, the sexes aren’t equal. It is exactly a woman’s greater sexual power that often makes a man so fearful of being rejected by her that he buys himself drinks to reduce his fear. In essence, her sexual power often leads to him drinking; his sexual power rarely leads to her drinking. If anything is evidence of her power over him, it is his being expected to spend his money to buy her drinks without her reciprocating.  …

It is  men – far more than women – whose mental capacities are diminished when they are “under the influence” of a beautiful woman. (p. 320)

But Farrell thinks it’s “sexist” – against men – to put men in jail for “selling sex” to intoxicated women:

As long as society tells men to be the salespersons of sex, it is sexist for society to put only men in jail if they sell well. We don’t put other salespersons in jail for buying clients drinks and successfully transforming a “no” into a “maybe” into a “yes.” If the client makes a choice to drink too much and the “yes” turns out to be a bad decision, it is the client who gets fired, not the salesperson.  (p. 321)

We’ve only just begun to scratch the surface of Warren Farrell’s equally daft and disturbing views on sex and rape. Stay tuned.

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opheliamonarch
11 years ago

Sorry everybody, bit long and off topic.

@kitteh. Regarding the Kindle, well I’m no expert, but..

I loved my Kindle e-reader. The only negative was that anything you bought through Amazon was locked into your Kindle library. Books bought from Amazon can not be transferred to a new e-reader, if you wanted a different type later on, say a Nook or similar.

However, if you have an iPad or other tablet (or mobile phone/computer- crap for reading) you can now use the Kindle app to view your Kindle library in full, which is what I do on my iPad.

This works for me, but a lot of people don’t like the screen, preferring E-ink, I turn down the brightness and have found it fine, probably best to look at them in the shop.

Also, the Kindle app does not allow you to arrange your library, which is a nuisance if you have a lot of books, I used to arrange mine into categories when I had the e-reader.

Although tablet screens are a bit stark, I found I read at night and with the Kindle I had to buy a cover with a light incorporated into it (£25) this was great, but was just as bright, in my opinion, as the iPad screen.

The other option is a Kindle Fire, if they’re available in Oz. The Fire apparently (I’ve never used one) does what the iPad does but has fewer apps, that being said its about a third of the price, and is around the price of a Kindle e-reader here in the UK.
Again you have the screen issue, it not being E-ink, although they claim it’s good. Again you’d have to view it for personal preference.

Must say, I use my tablet for everything, well not everything, risotto wouldn’t get far on an iPad. I use it for the Internet, reading, music, audiobooks, games, podcasts, photos, video, lovefilm etc.

You can download e-books that aren’t from Amazon onto a Kindle, but you have to do it via USB on your computer, I’m afraid It’s a drag and drop thing. Mr M did it for me once, a long while ago, apparently it’s easy.

Another plus of Amazon is that they have a lending library, although I’ve not used it so I can’t say how good that is.

Hope that made sense. Bit rambly, and very long *blushes*. Haven’t typed so much in ages, sorry if it’s a bit nonsensical.

Note, Amazon IS an evil company, don’t pay fair taxes etc. From what I’ve seen however, none of these companies are exactly fair trade/organic.

On the soul selling side Amazon seems to have the most choice/convenience.

Also, Louis the Hipster? Say it ain’t so! I told you Fedoras were bad! Louis caught the Hip!

Aaliyah
11 years ago

@Tamen

Then this paper might be of interest: Widom, C. S. & Morris, S. (1997). Accuracy of adult recollections of childhood victimization: Part 2. Childhood sexual abuse. Psychological Assessment, 8, 412-421.

Um, they still reported that they were abused (through those behavior-specific questions), even though they didn’t call it abuse. And the CDC pretty much used the same methodology in principle (i.e. by asking about particular things that happened to them rather than “Were you sexually abused?”). So that argument still fails.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Tamen doesn’t seem to understand some basic rules of social interaction, such as the fact that you can’t force people to have a conversation with you if they don’t want to.

pecunium
11 years ago

genderfool is a twit.

This is his advice on how to, “reclaim” feminism”, Kicking the bigots off the stage of Feminism can’t be the main focus of Feminism. It does need some focus. 5% is a good amount of focus. This will take work. This is my advice for reclaiming the word “Feminism” and the label “Feminist”. When ever you log in to write a post, look at the last 20 posts tagged “Feminism”. If there isn’t one clearly saying “This is not a feminist, even though they claim to be”, write one. Keep one post in the most recent 20 rejecting people’s use of the label “Feminist” This is how you kick people off the stage.

Yep, what feminism needs, (if it is to become the respected social movement he thinks it could become; if it follows his advice) is a circular firing squad, while nice guys like him move it to, “egalitarianism”.

About which he has lots to say. Most of it, “feminists don’t focus enough on men”.

Good thing I don’t think feminism needs to be, “reclaimed”.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

This much eyerolling can’t be healthy.

Tamen
Tamen
11 years ago

Kittehserf:
I made one comment and the just about the rest have been replies to direct questions – including this to your questions. And some have been replies to accusations and misinterpretations/misrepresentations.

So we have some (two I think) people telling me to fuck off and a number of other people asking me direct questions. People are of course free to stop adressing me – which would be the most common way to get strangers you don’t want to talk to to stop talking to you.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

Ophelia – thanks for the info! I don’t have a tablet or ipod or anything like that (I dislike Apple more than Macintosh, and their prices are ridiculously high here). All I’d want it for is reading books. I don’t even get apps and such on my phone: it’s a pre-paid and I prefer to delete things I don’t want from it. (I wish I could delete Facebook and such crap: I loathe that site.)

“Also, Louis the Hipster? Say it ain’t so! I told you Fedoras were bad! Louis caught the Hip!”

Ha! He’s been wearing fedoras before I’d even heard of them being associated with hipsters (though I’m sure the hats most hipsters wear are really trilbies, and just get lumped under the one name). Did you ever watch Foyle’s War? Sergeant Milner’s fedora is the best; Louis’s got one just like it.

He mentioned the hipsters ‘cos he knew I’d tell you. You’ve been officially teased! 😛

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

@kitteh, I’d definately get a Kindle then. Just because they have the most books etc.
I looked into the Nook when my Kindle went caput, and they were only just starting out here in the UK, so weren’t as established as Amazon, so much less choice.

There are other e-readers available here, but to me they just didn’t seem to have the ease of use or such a wide variety of books available for them, but that’s just my opinion, and I’m biased.

Also, I have a massive collection of hats, and am very bitter that hipsters have taken my beloved fedoras as their own. Stinky hipsters ruined hats for me. 🙁

Also, loved Foyles war, great hats. 🙂

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

I have an ipod and I have to say, don’t love it. It’s cute, but the sound isn’t all that great, and one of the buttons got jammed down after less than a year.

Tamen
Tamen
11 years ago

Aaliyah:

Um, they still reported that they were abused (through those behavior-specific questions), even though they didn’t call it abuse.

Could you please point me to where they state that respondents answered through the behavious specific questions that they in effect were abused even though they didn’t call it abuse?

This bolded sentence from the study seem to not support your interpretation:

In general, we found that women and men differ in the extent to which they recall or report having experienced childhood sexual abuse. Approximately 16% of men with documented cases of sexual abuse considered their early childhood experiences sexual abuse, compared with 64% of women with documented cases of sexual abuse. These gender differences may reflect inadequate measurement techniques or an unwillingness on the part of men to disclose this information. They may also reflect differences in the meaning of these behaviors for men and women, particularly viewed in a cultural context.

katz
11 years ago

Terribly disappointed that Derick wandered off the subject of media criticism and onto rape apologia. I was looking forward to his analyses of all the movies we suggested.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Katz: I would have loved his analysis of Full Metal Jacket, where the only female characters are hookers or snipers.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

I want him to do the entire Michael Bay back catalogue.

katz
11 years ago

I wanted to suggest The Hobbit and John Carter.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Or, if he’s who we think he is, can he do TV series too? I nominate Game Of Thrones.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

The Hobbit would just send him off on a rant about how it was totally disrespecting the menz to include Galadriel.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

Current TV series: The Dr Blake Mysteries. (Oh but of course Pell doesn’t think there’s anywhere real outside the US and maybe Japan, does he?)

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
11 years ago

I wanted to suggest The Hobbit

Galadriel shows up for at least 3 minutes, so obviously the movie is misandrist.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
11 years ago

Ooh, ninja’ed.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

I’d love to see Pellyboy made to watch a few episodes of New Tricks. His tiny little brain would explode.

Kittehserf
11 years ago

Thanks for the info, all – looks like a Kindle it is, come the time. Won’t be for a while; I’m probably facing knee surgery in the not-too-distant and I don’t know how much that’s going to cost.

Ophelia, Foyle’s War is one of my favourite series ever. I love watching Michael Kitchen. He conveys so much with the slightest change of expression; he’s a wonderful actor. Made a nice change to see him playing the hero, too. I’d only seen him as a villain before.

Not just the hats, either – that camel-hair coat of his, ooooh!

katz
11 years ago

Yeah, that’s the thing: Since he’s defined the presence of any female character who isn’t 100% hot and subservient as proving that the whole thing is For Women, he could just go “Galadriel exists” or “Daenerys exists” and so on. Still think 12 Angry Men would have him stumped, though.

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

@Kitteh, ouch! Lots of hugs coming your way. 🙂

opheliamonarch
11 years ago

Think I’m gonna go to bed everyone. All these horrible trolls trying to intellectualise other people’s trauma is getting me down.

I mean, child abuse? To justify your shit? Really? Can’t start talking to that bastard Tamen.

When do people decide to be such fuckers?

I thought, when we were kids, we all wanted to be the hero. When exactly do these wankers decide they want to be the creep that crawls around Internet discussions spewing out their particular brand of Narcissistic bullshit?

Fuck it, I’m so fucking miserable now.

*sigh* anyway, sorry, nighty night everyone. 🙁

Kittehserf
11 years ago

Mighty hugs coming your way, Ophelia!

Think of all us regulars here and all the decent people you know – Mr Monarch for a start! Sucks to be the trolls, and they probably know it deep in their maggot-ridden little souls.

Niters!

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