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a voice for men harassment johntheother misandry misogyny MRA rape culture rape jokes slacktivism that's not funny!

A Voice for Men attacks a male activist — with a rape joke reference

John Hembling (John The Other) has rape on the brain.
John Hembling (John The Other) evidently has rape on the brain.

In an apparent attempt to prove that they’re not misogynists, the folks at A Voice for Men have decided to take a temporary break from their practice of vilifying individual female activists to vilify a male activist – University of Toronto Student Union VP for University Affairs Munib Sajjad.

As far as I can tell, the folks at A Voice for Men decided to target Sajjad, perversely, because he told Toronto’s CityNews that he was afraid he was “going to be targeted” after announcing publicly that he thought a campus Men’s Rights group should be banned. The A Voice for Men post about Sajjad is a typically long-winded, and largely content-free, rant from the excitable John Hembling (“John The Other”).

But what’s more disturbing than Hembling’s empty bloviating on Sajjad is the way A Voice for Men has framed the attack. “Munib Sajjad, it’s your turn in the barrel,” the headline declares, and Hembling repeats the phrase “your turn in the barrel” in the post itself.

I wasn’t familiar with this phrase, so I looked it up, and found that it derives from a rape joke. Here’s the definition of the term, from Urban Dictionary:

To say someone is “in the barrel” or “taking a turn in the barrel” means it’s their turn to do an unpleasant task or to suffer an unpleasant experience.

Click on the “definition” link above to see the gang rape joke it’s derived from.

Rape jokes aimed at men — even men you don’t like — are certainly a, well, counterintuitive way of showing “compassion for boys and men,” as the A Voice for Men slogan has it.

EDITED TO ADD: Looking again at Hembling’s piece, I realize I hadn’t noticed his, er, argument that the term “mansplaining” — which I find useful from time to time — is somehow equivalent to the incredibly offensive term “[racial slur redacted]splaining,” which Hembling has just made up. (The slur in question starts with an “n.” You can figure it out.) This is ridiculous on its face, not to mention that it’s frankly racist not only to compare the alleged oppressions of men — who are not systematically oppressed — with those of black people — who are — but also to use a racial slur in doing so. Of course this isn’t the first time that A Voice for Men has used the n-word in an attempt to suggest that men, collectively, have it as bad as a historically disadvantaged and still systematically oppressed group.

Rape jokes and racial slurs: A Voice for Men has it all!

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Kielbasa
Kielbasa
7 years ago

@Kittehserf Do you hold the yarn in your left hand (continental) or right hand (English)?

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
7 years ago

Yeah, a party! I want to bring buffalo wings, potato skins, and little smokies in BBQ sauce. I also want to bring some Smirnoff Ice, to add some 90’s retro fun to the whole thing.

For mine and other Manboobzers’ kids, I can bring Capri Sun, cheese pizza, and my bubble machine.

If this is outdoors, we still need patio lights, a firepit with wood, and Cintronella candles. Do mosquito repellent candles count as misandric scented fucking candles?

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

RE: Kielbasa

I know. That’s the joke. An altar is what you sacrifice virgins on. An alter is the old psych term for a member of a multiple system–i.e., me. Since I am male, I am indeed an ‘alter boy.’

That said, don’t call me that. It’s in-jokey, but not something I would actually want anyone to call me, especially a singlet.

bahumbugi
bahumbugi
7 years ago

@LBT – my (dumb, cis) mind went to trans* when you said alter boy. so yeah i could see that getting all kinds of confusing.

@sarah rose – my brain bleeds trying to follow that whole illogical sequence.

Kielbasa
Kielbasa
7 years ago
Reply to  LBT

Ah, no wonder I didn’t get it; I have actually never heard of multiple systems (is that correct terminology?) before. I will make note not to call anybody that.

Karalora
Karalora
7 years ago

Do you think it would blow ol’ Prester John’s mind if i told him I used to be Christian until I got the distinct impression that Jesus was rejecting me?

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Katz: I thought the pointless argument around here was about the plural of octopus.

I’ll bring beer and wines, and a nice anejo for Freemage and I.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

RE: bahumbi

Yeah, considering ‘alter’ also has connotations of sexual surgery, it can definitely be a very bitter, touchy joke to make. I for instance have a thing with the subtitle ‘an alter boy zine,’ and though it was more popular than I expected, I’m not a big fan of the name I chose.

RE: Kielbasa

Yeah, no worries. We’re around. If you’re curious to learn, you can check out healthymultiplicity.com and have fun. (We’re one of the co-founders, Loony-Brain.)

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Karalora: you sure you weren’t just negged by Jesus?

katz
7 years ago

Kendra sounds like she throws the best parties ever, although admittedly I’m easily swayed by barbecue sauce.

I was passing Lucky Baldwin’s the other day and they had a sign out front with an arrow pointing towards their door that said “Newcastle” and an arrow pointing the opposite direction that said “no Newcastle”. A persuasive argument.

opheliamonarch
opheliamonarch
7 years ago

Don’t forget Eastern European knitting.

I think it’s like spelling, us Brits do it differently, and some would say more correctly than others 😉

Kielbasa
Kielbasa
7 years ago

@LBT

Thanks! I’ll try to get some time and take a look. Also, is it gauche to say that I would kind of like to redesign the website so it’s a little easier to read/navigate? Also also, do y’all have preferred pronouns?

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

I have the patio lights, firepit, and citronella tiki torches. Guess the party’s in Texas, y’all.

katz
7 years ago

I shall bring penguin-shaped olive appetizers and homemade ginger ale.

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

RE: Kielbasa

We’re not the only group in charge of the site, so some aspects are slapdash. Also, none of us are web-designers, which make it worse. We try to just make it as accessible as possible; the site I gave you is really just the main list. If you like, healthmultiplicity.com/loonybrain is us, with our comics.

As for pronouns, I (Rogan) am the only one who talks here, so ‘he’ is fine. As a system, we go by ‘they.’

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

Also, OMFG, I have left the index way too long. So many dead links! And apparently there are two index pages, and I have no idea which one is more updated, so I have to go through both and delete the spare? Ugh.

Times like this, I wish I was better with computers…

Karalora
Karalora
7 years ago

@hellkell

Although I appreciate the attempt at humor, it was damn traumatic at the time. I was 17, and everyone at church I told about this just told me I must not be praying right or believing hard enough ot something.

pecunium
7 years ago

Johnny-Spam (It’s a pressed meat): God Hates Shrimp

If yer gonna go all fundy, you need to go all the way (and if you try to say Acts oviates kashrut, then you have to tell me why it doesn’t change the rest of Deut. as well).

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
7 years ago

Kendra sounds like she throws the best parties ever, although admittedly I’m easily swayed by barbecue sauce.

Thanks, katz. Yeah, I’m a big fan of BBQ sauce, and unlike ranch dressing, it doesn’t go bad in the heat. I think I’ll use the Silver Dollar City sauce, rather than have to choose between Kansas City, Memphis, or Texas style sauces. (Speaking of online arguments, that topic there can cause some huge flame wars.)

I have the patio lights, firepit, and citronella tiki torches. Guess the party’s in Texas, y’all.

Perfect, sounds like a plan.

Also, this thread is teaching me a lot about food and drinks. I’ve had to google a lot of the things people are bringing, and it all sounds really tasty. Yeah for learning and trying new food!

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
7 years ago

Well, I hope continental is more thjust what hand you use to hold yarn in, because otherwise every left handed person on the planet is a continental knitter.

Also, Prester, I personally believe that God has a great deal of apologizing to humanity to do, considering that we’ve shown more empathy and morality than He ever has.

katz
7 years ago

Must there be a rivalry between different styles of barbecue? Can we not simply accept that each style encapsulates its own unique type of deliciousness?

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Karalora: I apologize.

Memphis sauce all the way! Born and raised on that shit.

opheliamonarch
opheliamonarch
7 years ago

hellkell, Texas? Texas? Not even if I flapped my arms really hard!

Well fine, I’ll have my mushy peas and mint sauce here, in Nottingham forest with the Green Man. Hmmmm perhaps I’ll take the swing ball.

pecunium
7 years ago

skeptifem: I really wish I had some mormon missionaries to unleash on john. Maybe then he would understand how stupid and annoying it is to witness to people.

It might be less annoying if he were actually giving meaningful witness. A story of how God in his life made the world a better place.

All he’s doing is saying, “God will let you rape people; if yer a dude. If yer a gurl God says raping you is totes cool, so get with the program.”

That’s piss poor testimony.

pecunium
7 years ago

Johnny-Spam There is only one God, and God is certainly not a she.

Hrmn… Elohim (one of the Hebrew terms for God) is both plural, and feminine. So it’s debatable; at least if one is going back to the Ur-text. If you are happy with the fallible works of a translating committee being treated as the Pure Form, well God have mercy on your soul.

That biblical passage does not condone rape.

Yes, it does, explicitly:

con·done
/kənˈdōn/
Verb

Accept and allow (behavior that is considered morally wrong or offensive) to continue.
Approve or sanction (something), esp. with reluctance.

It “accepts and allows” the act of rape to continue. Pay a forfiet and you even get to keep raping her; and it’s sanctioned because the offender obeyed that passage.

That’s about as purely as one can condone anything.

Marie
7 years ago

@Prester

Shiraz: Godliness is following the word of God; as it is stated clearly in the authorized King James Bible,

Why the King James Bible? Why not an earlier one? It can only get changed more over time. (nontroll religious people, feel free to correct me if I’m missing something.)

I am familiar with the term MRA(Men’s Rights Activist) and while my feelings about this movement are mixed, what I know is that men’s rights are God given and God commands women to respect and obey men

Doesn anyone else have a say on this (one what the bible says, obviously not on whether this should happen). Because my most recent memories of church/ bible stuff was that the ‘wives, submit to your husbands’ guy was Paul or something, not God.

It most certainly has, emily. And you are NOT a “goddess”! There is only one God, and God is certainly not a she.

Again, more knowledgeable people correct me, but I thought God was referred to in neutral pronouns in Hebrew.

The sin of rape is used by feminists to justify the greater sin of abortion: the destruction of innocent, defenseless human life.

Where does it say in the bible that abortion is a sin?

Rape is the subject of this post, and ultimately is it all part of God’s plan.

Wow God’s kinda a dick then. Luckily I don’t think God wants people to get raped, or that zie thinks we should ‘make the best of a bad situation’ and accept marrying a rapist/ carrying babies of our rapist. Because I would have a really hard time worshipping a god who thought rape was okay, and even if I knew for sure that such a god existed, I still would not be able to worship them.

@fade

On that note, I’ve always thought that Athena was the coolest Greek goddess. I was mildly disappointed when I read/heard that legend again and saw that she and Hera and Aphrodite were all competing for some puny human’s affection!

You’re totally wrong, Artemis is the best Greek goddess! (is it weird I have opinions about this?)

@prester

Your anger at the truth doesn’t make it any less factual.

Okay, if you are going to say religious are true, you need a citation.

And no, the bible is not a citation.

@Cthulhu’s Intern

I swear, this Prester_John guy is going to say something like “If God doesn’t exist, then why does a banana fit in your hand perfectly?”

XD

A long, long time ago:

SirRandomGuy: My arm is bleeding and I need some medical help to fix it! God, can’t you give us medicince.
God: What the fuck do you guys expect, I already gave you bananas that fit right in your hands.
SirRandomGuy: Oh, I know, what if you gave us–
God: Fucking ungrateful jerks, don’t like my bananas.

wow that made no sense. /rambling.

pecunium
7 years ago

katz: Around here the pointless argument is usually steel-cut vs rolled oats.

Is that home-here, or manboobz-here? Because I thought the manboobz-here one was the plural of octopus. 🙂

pecunium
7 years ago

wordsp1nner: I just finished a 2×3 cable of alpace/tussah. Didn’t overspin the plies enough, so it’s a bit twisty. I may uncable it when it’s dry, and retwist it.

Marie
7 years ago

Hrmn… Elohim (one of the Hebrew terms for God) is both plural, and feminine. So it’s debatable; at least if one is going back to the Ur-text. If you are happy with the fallible works of a translating committee being treated as the Pure Form, well God have mercy on your soul.

Sweet, ninja’d, and I was kinda right then! Just had to hear it from someone else since I’m all out of touch with Christian-y stuff, and never sought out the info on my own, just heard what was said at church + assorted internet sites, now at least 😉

katz
7 years ago

More than that, he’s not making an argument at all. Just as he did with Catharism, he’s just saying “do X because my religion says so” and when people say “I don’t want to do X,” his only response is “join my religion and then you’ll want to.” No reason why we should want to, not even a hand-wavey “you’ll be happier that way.”

Almost as if his actual goal was just to piss us off.

neuroticbeagle
neuroticbeagle
7 years ago

oooh party. I will bring dark chocolate covered almonds and the world’s cutest misandrist beagle. (Careful of those puppy dog eyes- she will beg for whatever your eating).
http://i.imgur.com/Cc1evFW.jpg

katz
7 years ago

Because I thought the manboobz-here one was the plural of octopus.

Oh dear god, we’re going to start a pointless argument about which pointless argument we have the most.

becausescience
becausescience
7 years ago

Pester-er John had me at feminist pagan witches. Where do I sign up? What cool spells do we get? Do we get a super duper cool feminist grimoire, too? I’m excited!

becausescience
becausescience
7 years ago

I didn’t see Pathetic-er John’s comment about rape being part of God’s plan. A dumptruck loadfull of legos onto him!

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

…I don’t really have anything I can bring to a party. <.< Poverty, ho. Maybe I can bring, like, some of the extra thingies of tea a friend gave us? I have random bits of blueberry rooibos.

Flying Spaghetti Monster
Flying Spaghetti Monster
7 years ago

I have many, MANY, ex christian women followers, at least 70% of which are staunch feminists. Christianity is a patriarchal, misogynist belief system which is evident by the words in its own holy book!

Marie
7 years ago

@becausescience

Pester-er John had me at feminist pagan witches. Where do I sign up? What cool spells do we get? Do we get a super duper cool feminist grimoire, too? I’m excited!

I want awesome spells! 😀 Sign me up too!

Fade
7 years ago

My chosen spell is Blood Barrage* It is feminist because it relates to blood and that means PERIODS obviously

I don’t know why periods are feminist, but I’m ninety nine percent sure mras think they do. After all, why else would they refuse to use them?**

*has anyone else played runescape? (except Marie, lol I know you did :P)

**I do not know if this joke even succeeded

katz
7 years ago

LBT, you can bring your awesome company 🙂 and rooibos is my favorite tea.

Fade
7 years ago

^seconding katz. parties are only fun because of the company!

pecunium
7 years ago

marie: Why the King James Bible? Why not an earlier one? It can only get changed more over time. (nontroll religious people, feel free to correct me if I’m missing something.)

Given the ability of scholars to build on previous scholarship and the ability of more modern scholars to have more texts to use as reference a more modern text can be better than an earlier one.

The real problems arise because of how culture has changed; and that is something we seem to be doing better at interpreting when looking at ancient texts.

Where does it say in the bible that abortion is a sin?

It doesn’t. In the Pentatuech (the books of Moses) and the rest of the OT abortion is not only condoned, but required (the life of the mother is more important than the life of the child). For an Orthodox Jew abortion can be religiously required.

neuroticbeagle
neuroticbeagle
7 years ago

@Fade It took me a second but I loled after I got it. 🙂

Fade
7 years ago

sweet!

Marie
7 years ago

@Pecunium

Given the ability of scholars to build on previous scholarship and the ability of more modern scholars to have more texts to use as reference a more modern text can be better than an earlier one.

Ah, that explains it. I was just questioning the trolls choice, mostly for the ‘obvious trolling’ part.

And thanks for the answers 😀

LBT
LBT
7 years ago

RE: Katz and Fade

Ooh, ooh, we can do entertainment! We’ll be the PC Storyteller for the evening and improv stories from suggestions!

katz
7 years ago

See, LBT? Wouldn’t be a party without you.

freemage
freemage
7 years ago

Marie: Some of the questions you asked are worth answering, even with the banning of Pester Johnny. For disclosure’s state, I’m an Atheist these days, but spent the first 35+ years of my life as a very devout/practicing Episcopalian.

Why the King James Bible? Why not an earlier one? It can only get changed more over time. (nontroll religious people, feel free to correct me if I’m missing something.)

In general, fundies and others of their ilk prefer to cite the KJV because it supports most of their positions the best. Also, since it was the first major translation into English, it’s regarded as the ‘purest’. Remember, these folks believe that the world is on a long, slow slog to Armageddon; anything that can be considered ‘progress’ is therefore anethema to them. At the same time, learning other languages is hard, so they’d rather just stick with the first English copy and be done with it.

Doesn anyone else have a say on this (one what the bible says, obviously not on whether this should happen). Because my most recent memories of church/ bible stuff was that the ‘wives, submit to your husbands’ guy was Paul or something, not God.

Most Christians, even the moderates, are technically “Pauline Christians”–they regard Paul’s writings to be as divinely inspired as the Gospels, pretty much. Most Christians who are into debate will assume that Paul’s writings supercede anything in the Old Testament whenever there’s conflict. Thus, for instance, jibes about shellfish roll right off their backs, since Paul says kosher rules are gone. Instead, you should challenge them to insist that all women who go to church either wear a hat or shave their heads (1 Corinthians 11). On the flipside, you can point out that Paul was totes okay with Christians owning slaves, unless the slave was a Christian who was interested in being an evangelist.

Again, more knowledgeable people correct me, but I thought God was referred to in neutral pronouns in Hebrew.

Neutral, and even plural at points.

Where does it say in the bible that abortion is a sin?

It doesn’t, at least not directly. In fact, it actually orders abortion in the case of suspected adultery.

Wow God’s kinda a dick then. Luckily I don’t think God wants people to get raped, or that zie thinks we should ‘make the best of a bad situation’ and accept marrying a rapist/ carrying babies of our rapist. Because I would have a really hard time worshipping a god who thought rape was okay, and even if I knew for sure that such a god existed, I still would not be able to worship them.

If I weren’t an Atheist–if I actually believed that the God of the Bible was real, I’d have to spend my entire life opposing the motherfucker. As it is, the character of “God” is the sickest asshole in fiction, ever.

You’re totally wrong, Artemis is the best Greek goddess! (is it weird I have opinions about this?)

Not at all; of course, I regard the Greeks as a rather lame group of deities (and full of patriarchal misogyny, to boot). Give me Freya, Frigg and Hel, or alternately Isis and Bastet, over those Greek posers.

Let’s see if all those offerings to the blockquote monster worked….

Marie
7 years ago

@freemage

Thanks for all the info 🙂

Most Christians, even the moderates, are technically “Pauline Christians”–they regard Paul’s writings to be as divinely inspired as the Gospels, pretty much.

:/ Didn’t know that. Kinda peeved though (at them, not you). Just luckily haven’t met any who’ve made it obvious in real life.

Most Christians who are into debate will assume that Paul’s writings supercede anything in the Old Testament whenever there’s conflict.

O_o Why? I mean, I like the New Testament better than the Old one, mostly cuz I’ve heard more from it in recent memory, and mostly cuz Jesus sounds a lot nicer than God in the Old Testament.

Thus, for instance, jibes about shellfish roll right off their backs, since Paul says kosher rules are gone.

So, what’s the shellfish stuff? (if you don’t mind answering). The only food-related knowledge* I’ve gotten is from my dad on why he eats seafood during lent but no other meats or dairy products.

*age 18, finally able to spell knowledge without having spell check fix it for me! ::parties:: /milestone.

bahumbugi
bahumbugi
7 years ago

@ Marie —

the KV version of the bible is quite beautiful compared to other translations, but it is also a very poor translation. i think the revised standard is what is considered by experts in the field to be the most “accurate,” if my undergrad memory serves. and as another poster rightly stated, it is often most easily manipulated to serve certain political agendas.