Gather ‘round the fire for yet another retelling of what may be the Manosphere’s favorite fairy tale. You know, the one about the evil ladies who have lots of sex with “bad boys” in their early twenties, only to panic a few years later and desperately try to attach themselves to hardworking beta schlubs once they realize that their looks are fading. You know, like that lady riding the rooster that alternates with the mammoth in the Man Boobz header graphic.
This particular version of the tale – posted to the perversely misnamed “Happy Bachelors” forum by a long-time MGTOWer called Outcast Superstar – somehow manages to avoid the phrase “cock carousel” entirely. But regular readers will find the story familiar nonetheless.
Here, without further ado, is “Suckers Vs. Fuckers,” by Mr. Superstar.
[W]estern women love excitement and hate boredom. When they are in their teens and early 20’s, they don’t want stability that suckers have to offer because that is boring.
Gosh, who could imagine that anyone in their early twenties might be more interested in dating various people instead of settling down?
Keep in mind that women don’t think for themselves but decisions on who they date or sleep with is usually made by the council not by the woman herself. This council is usually made up of her mother, sister, and friends etc. If dating a nice guy is not considered to be fun and popular by the “council” he is going to get snubbed.
The fellows at South Park have provided us with a rare glimpse into the workings of these mysterious councils.
There is another group of guys called fuckers. Women love to have sex with these guys during their prime years. Although they offer no stability to these women, however women will still sleep with them. The reason why women will is because they are unpredictable and therefore they are deemed as very exciting.
Oh, but things change radically when these evil ladies start to … age.
Once these women get to there late 20’s – early 30’s they will fraudently sell their looks to suckers who make a good income in order to get married. In other words they will put on a pony show for them until they get the ring.
But as long as these ladies hold onto any of their youthful prettiness, they can still cause trouble.
After a few years of marriage, these women are going to get bored and everything is the suckers fault. They will look for affairs and cash out on their suckers knowing that they will get the house, child support (if they have children), and alimony. All she has to do is file a false abuse charge (no proof necessary) to make all this happen. Even as a bonus, the sucker even gets to pay for her attorney fees.
But ultimately these evil gals will get their comeuppance.
Despite there not being any legal justice in this country, Mother Nature has a justice of her own.
Those suckers who once ached for these women will lose interest in them once they get to be in their mid to late 20’s. The last thing they are going to find attractive are used up women in their late 20’s-30’s. In fact these women must be avoided at all cost. They got a disease called baby rabies. They are going to do everything possible to get pregnant and trap you into a long term relationship where they can get provided for.
Happily, western “suckers” can escape the clutches of these evil ladies. After all, western men have alternatives, in the form of foreign women and, er, model railroads?
[O]nce those “suckers” get financially stable they will get to travel to foreign countries and enjoy beautiful women. Also, while in the United States, they will have developed fun hobbies to do when they are not working. In fact these “suckers” will not have to deal with the stress of fear of divorce, a nagging whore, false abuse and rape chargers, get to keep their sanity and money, won’t have to worry about raising kid that aren’t theirs etc.
And so these so-called “suckers” can sit back and watch with pleasure as the ladies who refused to have sex with them in their younger years grow old and miserable at approximately twice the speed of the more-gracefully aging men.
[T]he women who neglected the “suckers” in favor of the “fuckers” during their prime years are going to have to face justice. It’s not legal justice but Mother Nature justice. Once they get to their late 20’s for every year a man ages, they will be aging by two years. They will wrinkle and get ugly very fast. Investing thousands of dollars in makeup in order to form a bond with a “sucker” is not going to get the job done because they failed to form a bond with a “sucker” during their prime years. Their biological clocks will be ticking and they will get very desperate. They are going to want to be talking care off, like living off a “sucker” so they won’t have to work.
To interject for a moment, I believe that when Mr. Superstar refers to women who are “going to want to be talking care off,” what he means is that these women are “going to want to be taken care of.”
I’m reminded a bit of Kevin Kline’s teleprompter troubles in the movie Soapdish.
Oh, but Outcast Superstar isn’t quite done with his story yet:
Disgusted by their behavior, the “suckers” will not want anything to do with them and will rebuke them. They are going to have to work long hours for the rest of their life because they could not find a “sucker” to take care of them. They will whine and complain that the “suckers” will not commit despite them snubbing them in favor of the “fuckers” during their prime years. They will rot all alone with no one to take care of them, many of them will not get to have children, and will be living very miserable lives until death all because they thought it was cute to let the “suckers” rot all alone while they go squander their prime years to the “fuckers” That my friends is what I call justice!
Um, that’s cool and all, but aren’t these ladies supposed to have cats?
You’re not telling the story right!
Outcast Superstar, tell us the story AGAIN. But with CATS!
NOTE: I found this lovely story after it was reposted on MarkyMark’s blog. After a fairly long period of inactivity, old MarkyMark is posting like there’s no tomorrow.
Image at the top borrowed from Comically Vintage.
Why won’t women have sex with you? Because your grapes are so sour that your personality has turned into vinegar.
(And not the fancy balsamic kind either.)
Mmmmm. Balsamic vinegar.
I feel like they are talking about wrinkles, I think they are imagining women who have sex to look like long time meth users in their 30’s. Hence the talk about used, worn-out women.
Personally, I look forward to my 40’s, even my 70’s, look-wise. If I can judge by the looks of my female family members, wrinkles and grey hair will look pretty good on me 🙂
Sorry, this comment is late and derailing, I just feel uncomfortable comparing women of any age to the image guys like this seem to have of 30 somethings…
Old women in general don’t look ‘used’ to me…
*feel like they are not talking about…typo…
The “used” bit’s a good point, TomBcat. And you’re not derailing at all!
“Sorry, this comment is late and derailing, I just feel uncomfortable comparing women of any age to the image guys like this seem to have of 30 somethings…
Old women in general don’t look ‘used’ to me…”
Me either. Not at all. But then again, these guys don’t seem to have any meaningful relationships with ANY real woman. So, what would they know?
Maybe they think real women look like, I dunno, deflating RealDolls?
Many probably had a few, but chose to dwell on any negative aspects of those relationships instead of appreciating the experience.
But I guess all this talk about spent whores stems from some archaic image of virginity anyway…
The spitefulness can’t get to me today, I finally had some sleep and now I feel like love incarnate.
Eh, I think it’s a fairly simple revenge fantasy coupled with their anger distorting what they’re seeing around them.
Glad you got some sleep, TomBcat! 🙂
Have you ever considered that this narrative might be more common than you’d like to think? It obviously isn’t universal, but stereotypes gain traction for a reason.
Yeah, well, but this particular revenge fantasy seems to have to do with some image of sexual purity. The usual go-to fantasy seems to be about how a woman will end up with a complete asshole.
Probably isn’t healthy to wonder where these thoughts come from. Red Pandas!
Is it just me, or do Red Pandas fall over more often than any other cute animal? They even jump each other by falling!
@cloudiah: here’s the post by the Amazon Reviewer PUA/MRA dude who thinks he knows women better than they know themselves. Possible tw due to discussion about rape and consent/lack of consent:
http://www.amazon.com/review/RJB729Z1GG8PP/ref=cm_cr_pr_cmt?ie=UTF8&ASIN=1580052576&linkCode=&nodeID=&tag=
His “argument” reads like it was lifted straight from a pickup guide and seems to boil down to getting an enthusiastic yes would be bad because it might possibly interfere with guys boner needs, and we all know dude’s boners are more important than anything.
I think the thing with age and the cult of youth is a general “creepy guy” attitude. It’s amped up to 11 in gays, where if you’re a twink over 21 you might as well be 80. I’ve had men who were totally into me suddenly change their minds when they found out I’m 23 and not 17 (I have the joy of looking like a young teenager, to the point where I get ID checked going to R16 movie so)
@TomBcat: I’ve seen giant pandas fall over a lot too. Falling is a surprisingly efficient means of locomotion. I often use it to get out of bed in the morning.
@ WeeBoy
I’ve actually used the creepy guy obsession with youth to my advantage before, by stating my true age to someone who assumed I was younger so he would piss off and stop bothering me. It’s occasionally useful that it works, but it’s also sad.
Ah yes, model railroading, the hobby of young boys and the old men who love them. I think it would suit this lot rather well, given how creepy and obsessed with youth already. (No offense to those who indulge the hobby *without* being creepy, but our local model railroading has been rocked by several allegations of child molestation, so I’ve started to take a dim view of it. Seriously, all the guys I know who were affiliated with the club were creepy as hell).
Thanks, becausescience. That was … a thing.
Anyone who can exist with the level of self delusion and hatred exhibited by MRAs, deep down must, really … really, hate themselves.
It’s amazing how women can never get a damn break. One side of the asshole brigade thinks women who want to have kids are desparate and pathetic…and the only reason they want to do so is to “cash in”…because taking care of kids is not a full time responsibility or anything.
Then you have the assholes like Joe Rogan who say if you don’t like kids he thinks you are comparable to a dog who eats his own shit.
Lovely, men. It isn’t hard enough feeling judged by my looks and sex life and every damn thing else.Now I’m supposed to plan my reproduction around your opinions? How about they just all STFU until someone is interested in having a baby with them, then they can scare them off with their bullshit theories.
Western women love excitement and hate boredom. Eastern women, however, simply adore boredom and cannot stand being excited.
Argle bargle. The end.
The curse “may you live in interesting times” isn’t about war and famine and awful things like that, it’s just that people in the Mysterious East really like being bored.
@augochlorella
Oh my flippin god, they listen to *DENNIS FUCKING PRAGER*? This insanely creepy dude?
Wow, every time I see him, I just think “I wonder why this charming man has been divorced twice.”
Every scenario I have seen these “women hating” men talk about, is EXACTLY how THEY act. THEY as teenagers, twenties, and beyond, manipulate numerous girls into believing they are kind, caring and respect them. They constantly tell the girl to have sex with them, day after day, month after month, until she finally gives in, sometimes even YEARS later. The girl gives in just to make him happy, then the guy dumps her, moving on to the next girl. I was a virgin til I was 23 because I never trusted guys! I knew LOTS of girls that remained virgins because of emotionally abusive and conniving men. The girls who slept around were almost ALWAYS sexually or physically abused by a man at a young age. That was my experience.