I‘m beginning to wonder if every single complaint from manosphere misogynists comes back to their rage at the fact that women get to decide who can have sex with them. Take the following comment from MGTOWforums.com. The ostensible topic of conversation? A study reporting that women tend to feel more stressed than men at work. Watch how deftly MGTOWforums “senior member” 7 Deadly Sins turns the topic from “women in the workplace” to “my sad penis.”
They wanted to work so now they’re working. Oh work is too hard and stressing you out? Too bad. You wanted to be career whores, right ? Enjoy. If you give women what they ask for, they still want more. Who cares if they’re stressed out? They can always get dicked down and take some of the edge off. Men can’t get sex whenever they “feel” like it. Nobody cares what you whores think or feel any more.
Damn. That’s some pretty intense boner rage there, dude.
I’m 22.
I want to be thinner though. I am chubby. I have moments where I really feel like I’m pretty and I have moments of complete body hate. My dad constantly nags me about my weight. My mom bought me a gym membership for my birthday.
I’m not nearly as active as I used to be.
They’re very 70s, and not in a good way. Which is how I feel about a lot of the really high waisted stuff, like it does odd things to the shape of people’s bellies and makes very thin young women look like they have bellies that I know don’t actually exist.
Actually melody is a perfect example of people who look great in low rise pants! If they fit well what happens is that they sit just low enough to show off the waist.
@cassandra says
AH. Those are terrifying shorts.
Okaaaaay. Your parents are NOT helping. I wouldn’t even go so far as to call you chubby. It seems incredibly plain to look at you that you could lose a little bit of fat, but you are still going to have the same basic shape and fat distribution and will be perceived as big because you have hips and your stomach curves. Which, if you look at any number of very slim women you will see is the case.
Please bear in mind that an actually flat stomach is almost impossible for most people, and constant work to maintain for everybody else.
I am a big advocate of finding the kind of exercise you like, so if you have a gym membership, try out the various classes they offer, see if anything’s fun: usually there are personal trainers that will do a session for free because they need clients, see if you can work with them.
Try and do stuff that makes your body feel good rather than trying to shape yourself – because unless you’re willing to entirely dedicate your life to it, you CANNOT have the body you’re sold as perfect. And even if you do, it’s unlikely you’ll be good enough for yourself or even your parents. 🙁
I don’t know what’s up with my legs! It started with plantar fasciitis over a year ago, and I got custom orthotics. My left leg’s 1/2 inch shorter than my right. The orthotics improved things, but after a while my legs started getting sore in all strange places, and for the last couple of months or so I’ve had pain centring in my left knee. The muscles up and down get really locked up, and while they respond to manipulation (I’ve been seeing an osteopath) they don’t stay right for long. It varies from day to day, but walking always makes it worse, which is REALLY ANNOYING when 1) it’s the only exercise I like and 2) I use PT so haven’t actually a choice in the matter.
Anyways my osteo’s worried now that it’s structural and has referred me for an MRI, which I’m having done after Easter.
I am starting to be sold on high waisted shorts sucking, to be honest. I looked up pictures, and it seems it only really works as dress ups.
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0/c5/3/AAAAAosEHLkAAAAAAMU1zw.png?v=1201334573000
http://www.kaboodle.com/hi/img/c/0/0/1c9/f/AAAADK9hTb0AAAAAAcn2Bg.jpg?v=1332274933000
Kitteh! 🙁 It’s amazing how your feet can fuck up your whole structure, let alone when one leg is shorter. I hope the MRI goes well.
I suspect something like belly dancing could be good still, but you’d need to change lots of things and that’s a bit of a mission.
@The Kittehs’ Unpaid Help
Owie. I hope everything is okay.
@hrovitnir
True. But the second one is kinda adorable.
I don’t like shorts, but high waisted skirts look super professional and still manage to be sexy.
Very young women blessed with roundish bottoms and thinnish lower legs can get away with it to my eyes. Usually very short young women of SE Asian/Pacific Islander extraction or very tall gawky young white women.
This may be ever-so-slightly influenced by a (short, slim but moderately curvy) high school crush of mine and her signature high-waisted shorts.
PS yes, I’ll definitely be posting a pic of The Dress, if it fits! 🙂
melody – going from that photo, I would NOT call you chubby. Lovely women’s curves is what I’d say (also hoping not to sound creepy).
And your parents are acting like … what’s the technical term for it? Oh yes, asshats.
High-waisted skirts are a different thing entirely, and can be super sexy.
melody: you are not going to be everybody’s cup of tea. But you are slim (even with a little bit of fat – women retain more fat!) and gorgeous. Do you know Nigella Lawson? Seen as one of the sexiest women alive – similar body shape, more of a belly than you.
http://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyle/article6714179.ece/ALTERNATES/w460/Nigella+Lawson
http://i2.listal.com/image/4365728/600full-nigella-lawson.jpg
Haha! I agree with this assessment, actually.
THOUGH. I have observed, personally, that something that looks nice to my eyes on, say, a Japanese woman, may well look terrible to me on a similarly proportioned white woman. So there is some sort of weird cultural thing going on as well.
Yay!
Yeah, I’ve pretty much given up any idea of bellly dancing, even if I could find somewhere in this extreme-outer-suburb to do it. Just moving around like that in bare feet (and my feet are totally flat and pronated) on odd-length legs comes under the heading of Asking For Trouble, I think.
I am thinking tai chi might be helpful, once we know what the devil’s going on with the legs. – Ah, we had that conversation the other day, didn’t we? I’d best not start it over again, particularly at this time of night. In fact, I’d better get to bed, it’s nearly 11pm. I’d like to stay up, but six hours’ sleep is minimal enough, lol.
Niters all, and hugs for anyone as wants ’em!
I love my parents. I think my mom worries because she gained weight and kept gaining it.
She doesn’t want me to develop diabetes. We don’t know a lot about my family history, but my moms paranoia comes from her mother having diabetes which happen after she gained a significant amount of weight. I have no idea why my dad is so fixated.
Every parent has flaws I guess.
I love costumy outfits. I can wear odd things when I go out of town. I went a few hours north of where I live once and wore a mask and a cloak the whole time for fun.
My outfits closer to home are totally inspired by vintage. I really want a rockabilly dress to add to my collection of styles from the past.
@hrovitnir
She is beautiful!
Melody, dayumm, I think you have a gorgeous figure and your weight suits you, don’t change unless you want to, and ignore your Father, his opinion is not relevant.
And Hrovitnir, my Mum actually ended up with having her hip dislocated when she was in labour with my younger brother and it wasn’t noticed for years. It was only spotted when she went a physio for back problems about 5 or 6 years back (considering my brother was born nearly 19 years ago…) and he spotted it. It’s probebly been a large part of the cause of her back rpoblems and it also meant that for years she walked oddly to compensate for it which has affected her posture and loads of other things.
So yeah.. childbirth is scary.
Part of the problem with those demon shorts is that they are actually a fraction too big for the model. shorts like that should be absolutely skin tight. Also I they look better on people with some arse and rounder hips, whereas the model is very slim in the hips and has quite a flat bum. (Which is obviously fine but just doesn’t quite suit those shorts).
I have a pair of denim high-waist shorts, they’re vintage cut off Levi’s and I have them a bit looser than I need so they are more flattering.
But I don’t think I’ve worn them in public more than about twice as I just feel too self conscious in such small shorts :S
🙁 No matter how understandable, you really do not *need* to lose weight, though there’s nothing wrong with it if you want to.
Anyway, it is horrendously late here, so I will talk to ya’ll later! Have a good night!
@ hrovitnir
A. Proportions and b. what you wear things with. Short shorts with a loose, flowy top is a very different look from short shorts with a tight tank. My opinion is that shorter women almost always look best in shorter shorts or skirts, so short-shorts rather than bermudas, for example. Whereas flares look best on tall people.
Sleep well all. Its almost 5am here.
I really do want to lose some weight. I think the reason I gained it is because I used to ride horses and rock climb. I do neither now.
Belly dancing does sound fun though. And it sounds like a couple people have tried it and enjoyed it. Maybe I’ll see if there are any classes around here.
Did those high-waisted shorts have an elastic waistband at the back!?? Gah! Kill it! Kill it with fire!!!!!
TW for some fatphobic and eating related whoosits
My feelings about my body and the disordered eating patterns that can sometimes come with them seem to be very connected to my overall mental health. Two weeks ago it was warm and the sun was shining and I felt gorgeous in my own skin. Last night I had an anxiety attack and so I hated myself and my body and I and ate chips until it hurt as punishment.
I know I’m thin, but I tend to think in terms of body transformation. I get irrationally afraid becoming an *insert fatphobic term here, any will do* like, next week if I don’t radically change my life in the next 5 minutes. And then crying and bingeing and badness. I’m trying to change my thinking so that I concentrate on feeling better. It’s worth it to eat healthier because I’ll be energized throughout the day and my mood will improve, not because I will kill the Demon of Fat hiding inside me. It’s worth it to exercise, because exercise makes me feel happy and powerful and better about myself regardless of how my appearance changes. I dunno. This stuff is hard to kick when it crawls into your head.
@Kitty:
Because she was the bait. Bethany lured them, not Alisa.
That’s because it’s not my goal to joke around.
@hrovitnir:
I’m actually very skeptical we can measure libido on a scale, so: no numbers, no histogram, no bell curve.
I’m going for a cultural argument. Except for the early modern age in Europe (A) and contemporary Western culture (B), it was always unequivocally accepted that men very often want to have sex with women who don’t want to have sex with them and not the other way around.
(B) is explained by feminism.
(A) is more difficult. Population nearly halved between 1310 and 1380 due to the Black Death, famines etc. and stayed that low until 1500. To increase population it was important to suppress female control of female fertility (1) and not to discourage sex (2).
(1) partially motivated the witch-hunts and finally (2) is the reason why women were portrayed as horny creatures back then. (and if that argument fails there’s still a compelling case for “15th century apocalyptic religious craziness” = “21st century liberal craziness”).
You make an incorrect connection between “wrong” beliefs like “I’m entitled to sex” and feelings. Sure, rage may be *cough* a bit extreme, although I doubt there can be standards of “reasonableness” for feelings anyway…
What about envy? If some Nice Guy feels envious of other peoples fulfilled sex lives, is it his moral duty to fight those feelings? Do we even need a social norm to discourage people to express them?
Also could we please refrain to equate libido with an unpleasant feeling you quell by stroking your [insert applicable body part]? Kthx.
What is this I don’t even….
I…
Just….
What….
Um…..
So what DO you equate to libido, Kthx?
Wait…….wanting to masturbate isn’t included within your libido math?
Merriam-Webster defines libido as:
Masturbation is a conscious activity. And it is the result of a sexual drive.