The regulars at PUAhate.com – we’ve met them before — are a strange and bitter bunch. Most seem to be self-loathing so-called “incels” who blame their lack of romantic and sexual success on their average or below-average looks. Rejecting the basic premise of the pickup artist crowd – that average guys can transform themselves into suave lotharios by mastering manipulative pickup formulas – the PUAhate regulars tend to be true believers in what they somewhat pretentiously call “looks theory,” the odd and obviously untrue notion that women only date men with “male model” looks.
As one PUAhater put it recently:
PUA makes you think that all your problems are because of your personality/behaviour – i.e. things you can control. So when you keep failing, it means that YOU are fucking up and doing things wrong
the reality is that many of us just lost the genetic lottery. we are ugly, the wrong race, the wrong height etc, and that fucked us up. there is NOTHING we can do about it
So, naturally, the PUAhaters spend a lot of their time jealous of tall, good-looking men for their supposed monopoly on the women of the world — whom they also hate.
But the strange thing is that the PUAhaters pretty much hate everyone else as well. They get angry when guys they consider ugly score “hot chicks.” They get angry when guys who are good-looking but not male models get attention from “really hot girls.” And so on, and so on, and so on.
Indeed, many of the regulars seem to walk around in a perpetual state of rage, angry at each and every man who’s managed to pair up with a woman, not to mention the women as well.
One regular recently described his “day from hell” to his comrades:
To start the day I saw a couple where it was an average White guy with an OBESE Asian girl. They were walking around acting like they were trying to prove shit. LMAO. I wanted to kick the guy in the fucking nuts for dating that landwhale. If you’re going to use the racial advantage, at least date a girl who is under 300lbs. Later I go to the gym and see the same tall guys I usually do. Even if I had a good face, how the fuck do you compete with guys who are fucking 6’4”?
Then at the gym there’s this good looking White guy there talking to this Asian dude about how Asian girls are easy and how they approach him. To make things worse after that these fucking frat douchebags come in with their girlfriends to show off . Then to cap off the day a girl I used to know from freshman year walks right past me without even saying anything. I used to fucking live next door to this bitch and now she doesn’t even say anything and acts like a pretentious cunt. She’s an Indian girl dating a White dude lmao. Days like today make you wonder why you even still try in the first place.
Of course, as I’ve mentioned before, most of those posting on PUAhate don’t actually seem to be ugly by anyone’s standards but their own, at least judging from the pictures of themselves they sometimes post to the site, which reveal them to be mostly average-looking guys, with some of the regulars even quite conventionally handsome.
But evidently they would rather believe that they have “lost the genetic lottery” rather than face a more obvious explanation for why the girls don’t like them: because they’re shallow, self-obsessed assholes who hate themselves and hate women and radiate their bitterness from every pore. (And some are even creepier than this, like this pedophile – sorry, ephebophile – who’s angry at me personally because unlike him I don’t chase after 15-year-olds. Link NSFW.)
The PUAhaters often talk about getting surgeries to “correct” their supposed genetic flaws. They would do far better to spend that money on therapy.
The operative word here is seems. 😉
Definitely. Victorian ones, too. If I’d known librarianship was like this, I might have persisted with the course back in the day!
All I know of librarians, I learned from the SLWSMF. http://library-mofo.livejournal.com/
As an occasional lurker, watching a group of people I mostly agree with, address my personal situation as if I am a cultish delusional weirdo who had it coming is… quite odd.
What situation is that?
@ ranter
…bwuh. Guys who claim all women are X make me want to imprint the wall with my head.
so, I don’t understand the giant penis thing. I mean, I don’t thing many people I’ve heard talk about it want it in a date, it seems to be more concern to the person with the penis. Anyway, just confuses me. But it’s also so strange that they think their potential dates are staring at their pants so much too. Idk I’m rambling, just confused.
…this is perfect XD
@GT_GiantTurtle
I’m confused. Are you ‘incel’? That’s what I was assuming from the comment.
I’m blown away by some men I run into. Many are perfectly nice, but every once in awhile….
Like the guy who goes on and on about how I friendzoned him because I’m shallow and apparently easy (because I made out with one of his friends). However, he and I were not friends. At the time he made a move I had known him for a few hours while at the corn maze with my friends. I’ll be honest the fact that he is nearly a foot shorter than me was a factor, but I have dated shorter men than myself (like his friend who I have a good 4 inches on).
The thing is this guy goes on and on about how girls won’t date him, but I know three women who have made their interest known. He however doesn’t think their “his type” and doesn’t want to date them. BTW he doesn’t like them because they are a little overweight….. However, he doesn’t offer me the same courtesy to reject him. He once called me while masturbating to tell me he was thinking of me. And yet he thinks he is a nice guy…….
/end slightly off topic rant
@Marie
I think a large penis would intimidate me.
And my friend broke up with one of her BFs because it was just too large.
What the hell? Unless it was something the woman I was dating had explicitly asked me to do so as some sort of foreplay, I wouldn’t even do this to someone I was dating and had intercourse with on a regular basis.
melody – ewww!
Yeah, the whole “big penis” thing – we had that conversation not long ago. YMMV but mostly the comments were along the lines of “no thanks!”
Giant turtle – are you saying you’re dateless/lonely and think that’s what we’re mocking? If you read here and mostly agree with us, I’m guessing you’re not a PUA type or MRA or whatever, so I’m quite lost as to why you’d think we’re mocking your situation.
PUA “gurus” are snake oil merchants and too many of them are wannabe rapists, or actual rapists. They’re out to abuse women AND the men they sucker into their scam. These PUAhate clowns are just out-and-out misogynists who also hate any guy who happens to have a partner. They’re what we’re talking about, not the entire category of people who would like a partner but don’t have one. Which describes you, if either?
@Baroncognito
I think it was a “You can’t stop me from masturbating to you even if you aren’t interested in me” jab.
He is very bitter about it.
Other options: He gets turned on by audible disgust.
@Baroncognito
That…..is not an idea I wanted to introduce to my brain.
Oh, god.
I knew a guy in college once who took it into his head that in order to get right with Christ he had to apologize to everyone he had wronged.
Apparently this involved revealing to women that he had roughed up the suspect while fantasizing about them, and asking them to forgive him.
Dude … I’m pretty sure you can just apologize to God for lusting in your heart and it’ll be all right.
But what do I know? I don’t read Left Behind for fun.
Very sorry, not intended. If we spirits have offended. think but this and all is mended: Kittens are fun.
“roughed up the suspect”
Falconer, you owe me a cup of tea.
Unfortunately, like most of my favorite expressions, it’s not mine. I can’t remember where I got it from, except off the Internets.
I shall give you my espresso also, because Christ commands me to be a passive-aggressive dick.
Yes, I’m “involuntarily celibate”. And to satisfy the curiosity some of you displayed, sure, sex would be nice; and a relationship would be nice too. It’s not an either/or thing.
And it’s not so much mockery, but the sense of being picked apart like a faulty laboratory rat. The vibe some posters give is basically “Oh my; how does this even happen to people?!”.
I am familiar with PUA, MRA, MGTOW philosophies and how destructive they are. However, I’m also aware feeling like or being a social pariah, can lead to less than commendable thoughts. Posting those thoughts online and use them to excuse the reality those guys created in their own heads, is definitely a downwards step. But, partially, I have to understand them.
I assumed that the race comment was referring to the fact that American society frames Asian men as asexual, which is true and really does effect people’s dating prospects. But these are white guys whining that Asian women won’t date them? LOL. Cry harder, racist assholes.
Also, I’m curious as to why I dumped my ridiculously tall ex according to PUAhate theories? I mean, he was nearly 6ft5, doesn’t that mean he wins all the vaginas by default? Actually we broke up mostly because we were both young and stupid, teenage drama and so on, but honestly, a guy that tall? It’s kind of inconvenient if you’re my height. He was super cute, but if we’d stayed together I’d probably have back problems by now from how much time I spent with my neck at an odd angle just from talking to him.
@ Nobinayamu
Yeah, I assumed that same, that maybe they were just living in the library at college and just hadn’t noticed the couples all around them, but apparently they have noticed, and pretty much every couple in the world enrages them. That can’t be a fun way to live.
I don’t know who I’ve been listening to, but apparently it’s a good thing I’ve been listening to them, because I never heard the thing about Asian men being asexual until I hung out here.
African-American men being oversexed, yes, but not Asian men being asexual.
It just passed me by.
It’s not “How does someone not have sex” that people are wondering about. I, for one, haven’t had a serious relationship in the past four years and I don’t get physically involved with people unless I’m in a serious relationship. I know exactly how people are involuntarily celibate.
The vibe I’m getting from this discussion is more of a “how do these people get so vitrolic about things and blame their lack of dating on others?”
Sooo, your personal situation is that you can’t get laid therefore you go on the internet and complain about how bitches won’t fuck you and this is why you hate everyone?
And you mostly agree with us?
Newsflash: not everyone who has trouble with relationships and sex is “incel”. But wait, there’s more! Secondary newsflash: most people have dry spells at some point in their lives. I at one point went over 2 and a half years without so much as a prospect for a date.
We’re not picking apart how it is that people manage to go a long time without having sex. We’re discussing what makes them then go on to use that as an excuse to blame women for all their woes. And then the irony that their hatred of women makes it even less likely that they will get to have sex.
We are human beings, we know what it is like to not have something you really really want. We know what it’s like to be lonely. But our sympathy for folks who aren’t getting the intimacy they desire ends once folks start acting like total assholes about it.
Being a woman and not lesbian or bi, it would be weird of me to go on the internet and complain how bitches won’t fuck me. And, no, I don’t recall ever writing anything about hating everyone, outside of playful sarcasm. Perhaps back in my teens, in dirty scribbled notes?…
And 2 and a half all years? Damn, that must suck. But try decade instead.
Smooches! Rather you than me, though – I’m not touching that kind of simmering pressure cooker of rage. Who knows when they might explode?