The regulars at PUAhate.com – we’ve met them before — are a strange and bitter bunch. Most seem to be self-loathing so-called “incels” who blame their lack of romantic and sexual success on their average or below-average looks. Rejecting the basic premise of the pickup artist crowd – that average guys can transform themselves into suave lotharios by mastering manipulative pickup formulas – the PUAhate regulars tend to be true believers in what they somewhat pretentiously call “looks theory,” the odd and obviously untrue notion that women only date men with “male model” looks.
As one PUAhater put it recently:
PUA makes you think that all your problems are because of your personality/behaviour – i.e. things you can control. So when you keep failing, it means that YOU are fucking up and doing things wrong
the reality is that many of us just lost the genetic lottery. we are ugly, the wrong race, the wrong height etc, and that fucked us up. there is NOTHING we can do about it
So, naturally, the PUAhaters spend a lot of their time jealous of tall, good-looking men for their supposed monopoly on the women of the world — whom they also hate.
But the strange thing is that the PUAhaters pretty much hate everyone else as well. They get angry when guys they consider ugly score “hot chicks.” They get angry when guys who are good-looking but not male models get attention from “really hot girls.” And so on, and so on, and so on.
Indeed, many of the regulars seem to walk around in a perpetual state of rage, angry at each and every man who’s managed to pair up with a woman, not to mention the women as well.
One regular recently described his “day from hell” to his comrades:
To start the day I saw a couple where it was an average White guy with an OBESE Asian girl. They were walking around acting like they were trying to prove shit. LMAO. I wanted to kick the guy in the fucking nuts for dating that landwhale. If you’re going to use the racial advantage, at least date a girl who is under 300lbs. Later I go to the gym and see the same tall guys I usually do. Even if I had a good face, how the fuck do you compete with guys who are fucking 6’4”?
Then at the gym there’s this good looking White guy there talking to this Asian dude about how Asian girls are easy and how they approach him. To make things worse after that these fucking frat douchebags come in with their girlfriends to show off . Then to cap off the day a girl I used to know from freshman year walks right past me without even saying anything. I used to fucking live next door to this bitch and now she doesn’t even say anything and acts like a pretentious cunt. She’s an Indian girl dating a White dude lmao. Days like today make you wonder why you even still try in the first place.
Of course, as I’ve mentioned before, most of those posting on PUAhate don’t actually seem to be ugly by anyone’s standards but their own, at least judging from the pictures of themselves they sometimes post to the site, which reveal them to be mostly average-looking guys, with some of the regulars even quite conventionally handsome.
But evidently they would rather believe that they have “lost the genetic lottery” rather than face a more obvious explanation for why the girls don’t like them: because they’re shallow, self-obsessed assholes who hate themselves and hate women and radiate their bitterness from every pore. (And some are even creepier than this, like this pedophile – sorry, ephebophile – who’s angry at me personally because unlike him I don’t chase after 15-year-olds. Link NSFW.)
The PUAhaters often talk about getting surgeries to “correct” their supposed genetic flaws. They would do far better to spend that money on therapy.
Neil Strauss is rich, famous and successful from having been a PUA… he never let baldness get in his way, and neither should the whining incels.
Incidentally I’m writing this as a woman who has a baldy for a boyfriend, after I asked him out. Before you ask- no, he’s not a millionaire, he can’t drive, I’m taller than him in heels, and none of these things bother me. In fact, I like to pay my own way, I have never had any preference for height (and being about the same height has its advantages, nudge-nudge wink-wink) and I hate cars. I find all of these things- and more- attractive about him.
Humans are complex and so is attraction, I wish the MRAs would accept this.
Um, I don’t know. I am un-educated on the trolls 😛
Mark: no on ei smaking you be here.
I love how the PUA posts bring whiners and idiots out of the woodwork like no other topic.
dude, it’s called a community. People here actually like to talk to each other sometimes. I know this is hard for trolls to understand, though 😉
Amazingly despite the fact that I am biologically female no one walked up to me today and offered sex completely out of the blue. Really! And yet I interacted with quite a lot of men! Most of the conversations I had with them involved work or small talk that was absolutely not sexual in any way I can fathom. I had a conversation with a guy friend about how much of an asshole Freud was, but that’s the closest to “talking about sex” as it got.
Where is this mystical place where random hot men simply throw themselves at the feet of any woman they can find?
Trolls who whine about this blog act like they’re here under duress, but no, they just want the negative attention.
OMFG. Too many pages of comments!! I *will* read them all, but in the meantime this is way too relevant to my current situation not to comment. I am really sorry if someone said basically the same thing.
I am currently doing a first year Human Evolution and Sexuality course – it’s required for my BBmedSc in human genetics, apparently. It’s been interesting thus far but I am dreading getting into the sexuality aspect as we’ve just started to. Our lecturer is in his 60s, and seems like a lovely guy, but oooooooh god.
ASIDE: morons, we are indescribably different to many animals – we have an endoskeleton and lungs, some animals do not. Female birds have the short chromosome, backwards from mammals. Within fish, you have reproductive strategies that vary from “dump gametes, move on with life” to “male entices female, squeezes out her eggs, then chases her away and guards them until they hatch”. “Animals” is an inconceivably large spectrum of life!
Within our closest relations, primates, we have not one but FOUR different mating systems. Monogamous, polygynous, polyandrous and multimale-multifemale. These systems are all unique, have their own advantages and disadvantages, and observable effects on the evolution of sexual dimorphism and behaviour.
Saying “we’re all animals” is the most ridiculous thing EVER.
So anyway, Manboobzers, feel my pain. 🙁 I genuinely am totally down with learning about sexual selection but I cannot see anyway to teach it non-prescriptively. And we need to acknowledge exactly how difficult it is to study modern humans and make any “rules”.
Today the lecturer asked how many women would prefer their boyfriend to be taller than them. Not, “straight women”, just women. Not “is it a deal breaker”, just would you prefer it. Apparently taller men have greater reproductive success, which is well and good but HOW do you work out reproductive success when we no longer aim for THE MOST BABIES WITH MY GENES. What does qty of babies produced tell us about sexual attraction now? Do they mean number of sexual partners? Length of relationships? HOW DO YOU MEASURE THAT?!?!?! *head explodes*
ignotussomnium- I too get fed up at seeing these claims that all women have sex on tap and need never have dry spells or trouble getting laid. Thinking about my own experiences I can only wish that were true…
@Hrovitnir
Sorry to hear about your class :/ Sounds annoying.
Hot and cold running nookie!
@Argenti
Oops, my husband just caught me watching porn (that video)
Hrovitnir- if you really want to get all Daily Mailed-up, try reading Carold Jahme’s “Evo Psych Agony Aunt” column in The Guardian- now thankfully discontinued but all archived here:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/series/ask-carole
As a proper biologist, all I have to say about this is AAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH.
Hrovotnir, that sounds incredibly frustrating
@kitteh,
that is STILL a great picture Lovely lovely tail. But furry, not feathered 😉
I’m going to go with “c” some jack ass who shows up and offers his “above-it-all” opinion like anyone gives a shit.
@Marie
Can I steal this?
@mark jones
[insert wall of laughter]
I can’t tell who’s more pathetic: Looks_Law or someone who calls this website a bully hotspot.
What’s this people are complicated nonsense? I don’t know about you all but I am exactly like these fish; the only thing men need to do to get my attention is get together and start nibbling on each other’s genitals: http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/20665161
@mxe354
Sure, you can use it 🙂
“No wonder this website is becoming irrelevant and losing traffic, it’s become home to a bunch of bullies.”
CLAP HARDER
Actually, I think this thread has more comments than I’ve seen in recent memory…
@m354
dang, didn’t respond to the second part of that XD
because it is very hard to tell.
Thanks all. So. Frustrating. The lecturer seems to have a lot of respect for women and other races (the latter being important when talking about evolving out of Africa etc), and generally is open-minded but he IS an old white dude who specialises in human biological sexual selection. We are going to be learning about hip-waist ratios…
lol Oh, I feel you. That might kill me. I might save that up to share with some other gender non-conforming types, if they feel like being rage-amused. 😛
This is particularly amusing with your current name… 😀
P.S. I never said thanks Kitty, but thanks for complimenting my cat! I got way too behind on that thread. 😛
Woah. So I haven’t yet caught up with the comments here, but here are a couple of things:
1) LooksLaw was indeed a sock of Virgil, so he’s banned again.
2) I have no way of knowing if “Ross Jeffries” is in fact the real Ross Jeffries (the speed seduction guy), so, Ross, I’m putting you on moderation until you verify that you are indeed who you say you are (with an email from the account you use on your website or whatever). I just want to make sure that you’re not an imposter.
3) Someone else posted as Neil Strauss but I rather doubt it’s actually Neil Strauss.
Hey, Virgil posted as Virgil back on page 6, just before Ross was all quotation marks do you speak them.
I read this as “all women have sex on top” and was like, “Well sure, some of us do, sometimes!” Have we had this video yet?
Hrovitnir, I hope your class isn’t too bad, but I do love your succinct explanation of why trying to explain human sex like via animal behavior doesn’t make sense. I may borrow from that sometime, if you don’t mind.