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I’m taking a break. So here’s a fantastic Bollywood dance number.

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Hey, everyone. So I sat down to write something about this horrific discussion of domestic violence on The Spearhead – which some of the Man Boobz commentariat have already started discussing here – and, well, I just couldn’t do it.

I need to step back a bit from this blog for a little while to clear my head and maintain my sanity. So I’m going to take a bit of a break – maybe just a few days, maybe a week – and post nothing but interesting videos and other things having nothing whatsoever to do with misogyny or the manosphere. You all, of course, can treat this any any other thread as a totally open thread to discuss whatever you want, including the regular Man Boobz topics of misogyny and general MRA shitlordery.

I’m going to start off with the dance number that first got me hooked on Bollywood music some years ago. This is from the 1998 film Dil Se, a drama about love and terrorism. But in Bollywood, even serious dramas have dance numbers, and Dil Se’s dance numbers are gorgeous and a little surreal.

The music from the film is by A.R. Rahman, a prolific and popular Bollywood music director best known in the US for doing the music for Slumdog Millionaire.

And  yes, that is Bollywood megastar Shah Rukh Khan dancing on top of a moving train without any safety harness or stunt double or CGI trickery. (Well, there are a couple of brief bits where a double might have been used.) Enjoy!

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cloudiah
7 years ago

You deserve a break. Here are some adorable gifs to help you remove the misogynistic toxicity:
Only hellkell can tell us if this is Biscuit.
It’s a sleepy duckling.
This cat knows how to communicate enthusiastic consent to being petted.

cloudiah
7 years ago

One more:
Penguins. Hopping.

Stevie
Stevie
7 years ago

Well, I certainly understand that any decent person needs to surface for air and take a well-earned break from the horrors that you tackle.

Also I am due to spend 36 hours in Mumbai at the beginning of May, and I will say hello to Bollywood for you!

Rachael P-McG (@StuffedFantod)

“He who walks in the shadow of love
Will have paradise beneath his feet.”

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
7 years ago

From your writing, I’ve been thinking that you’ve been burned out by all the misogyny, lately. Have a good break, David!

My personal favorite Bollywood piece is this one, from another Shahrukh Khan movie called Don:

I mostly like it because of how bombastic and egotistical it is. I don’t know what any of the Hindi means, but I would not even remotely surprised if it was just five straight minutes of “I’m Don, I’m awesome.”

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Internet hugs if you want ’em, David – you’ve more than earned a break from the scumlordery of the MRM. Hope you have a great break and get lots of kitty petting in!

Some Gal Not Bored at All

Enjoy your well-deserved break! You do something that I am sure that I could never do and it is incredibly valuable. Thanks! Take care of yourself.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

That’s not Biscuit, but it is his M.O.

David, I totally understand the Spearhead’s brand of shitlordery driving you to a break. I’m not sure I want to discuss their deep, well thought out views on DV. /sarcasm

Enjoy the break.

drst
drst
7 years ago

This may appall the Bollywood purists but this is the dance number that got me hooked on “So You Think You Can Dance” – Katee and Joshua BEST COUPLE EVER!

Viscaria
Viscaria
7 years ago

“Pet me pet me” cat is a less gigantic version of Tiggers. That cat never stopped being a weird, adorable kitten.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

cloudiah: I made that cheese and nut loaf. It was delicious, we’ll be making that again.

augochlorella
augochlorella
7 years ago

I’m going to take this as an excuse to post this video. It makes me wish I grew up in India in the 80s.

If you could have spirit music videos the way people have spirit animals, this would be mine.

cloudiah
7 years ago

So glad you liked it, hellkell! I didn’t end up making it (because of all the weekend drama), but I pretty much have everything so I’ll probably make it next weekend.

Cthulhu's Intern
7 years ago

Oh, speaking of Bollywood, I’m really new to their movies and have been thinking of getting into them, since I really enjoy what few scenes I’ve seen (the good ones and the, um… not-so-good ones that are still good in their own way, I think you know what I’m talking about.). Does anyone here have any good recommendations?

From what I’ve seen, there also really needs to be a video game that’s a tribute to Bollywood action movies.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Sorry, I know nothing about Bollywood, but I do have some adorable sloths.

melody
7 years ago

Have any of you watched: White Rainbow? Its about the treatment of widows in India.

http://youtu.be/mUoFty0Dobs

Morgan
Morgan
7 years ago

I can see everyone else is posting random, unrelated stuff, which is probably a good idea, but I have to admit, I followed the links that David provided, and have some reactions:

I read the Spearhead article, and it was obviously horrible, but it was also classic Spearhead, and the wildly drawn incorrect conclusions on the story drawn by the commentariat were absurd to the point of being funny.

Indeed, I found that some of the most horrible comments were not from the Spearhead at all, but from the site where the photoessay itself was published, with commentary from people, who, judging by their handles, were probably women themselves, engaged in the most vitriolic, victim-blaming rhetoric that could easily hold its own against the most seasoned of MRAs.

raindog2
raindog2
7 years ago

I thought you might like this. I love this. It’s so insanely American.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Morgan

I’m not up for an expedition into the horribleness, but if you find any specimens you’d like to bring back for examination, I am totally up for studying them here. 🙂

I hate the victim-blaming that comes up in cases like this. I get the impulse to want the victim to have done something wrong so that you know if you do the right thing, you’ll be safe, but I will never understand acting on that impulse.

The thing that really struck me (yesterday, when I was holding more spoons) was how many people apparently believe that you should never have anything to do with someone who has spent time in jail/prison and that she deserves it for that reason. Do people really think we should just avoid convicts forever? Why do we even let them out of jail/prison? (I mean, I know why, but I also wouldn’t write someone off forever without considering what they’d done and, in most cases, why.) People are such assholes.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

So does this “never have anything to do with anyone who’s been in prison/jail” apply to people who made bail and a plea? How about if it was for pissing of a cop for daring point out the cop was acting illegally and endangering people by doing so? Probably a free pass right?

How about if we reword it to someone who couldn’t make bail and no plea was offered, so got assault charges on their record? And hey, if they’ll piss of a cop, who kows what they might do!

(FYI, this isn’t pulled from my ass, my ex-FWB pointed out to a cop that he was stopped behind the cop, at a green light, and texting a driving isn’t even legal…got punched in the face and plead out of assault charges…but an arrest is an arrest is an arrest?)

And yeah, I get the root of the victim blaming, I used to be of the “if I follow the rules I’ll be okay” variety too. That was two rapist ex’s and a gaslighting narcissist ago.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Also, the “why” factor — shoplifting for the hell of it is worse than for food, not that either is nearly severe enough to make one a pariah. Of course, the good looking white boys I knew who did it for fun were unlikely to get caught at all (unless they were holding hands?)

Tangent, cuz I’m angry still. Who put gay white men in charge of the GLBT movement anyways?

(And Jesus Christ, if the conversation about the trans* murder rate wasn’t infuriating enough, I’m currently waiting for a reply regarding the holocaust, yeah, he went there)

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Argenti

Of course, the good looking white boys I knew who did it for fun were unlikely to get caught at all (unless they were holding hands?)

What a coincidence! The guy I knew who shoplifted for fun was also a good looking white boy! When he finally got caught, he got sent to some sort of group therapy! (My sister loved him, they were 18, misandry, bad boys, hypergamy, something, something, rage?)

Hugs if you want them for the Holocaust conversation. That sounds unbelievably frustrating. Sorry.

Marie
Marie
7 years ago

David, I hope you have a good break. I don’t comment here much (more recently though) and wanted to send you good wishes.

katz
7 years ago

Have a good break. Since this is an off-topic thread, here’s Barklemore.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Some Gal — thanks, I gave him a math lecture and he seems to be avoiding replying (watch me get a reply once I post this >.<) I mean, the expected failures, and comparing holocaust deaths to the general death rate, from all causes? Dude’s just trying to skew the math so he can repeat about how deadly heart disease is (he’s a life-extension trans-humanist // occasional pain in my backside)

ArchaeoHolmes
ArchaeoHolmes
7 years ago

David, I want to thank you for trawling through this horrible stuff so I don’t have to. Your blog performs an invaluable service.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Gawd, Argenti, this jackass sounds like an Owly in the making. Get him talking about the Rothschilds (sorry, their even richer and more powerful cousins the Rothchilds) and how the City of London is a sovereign state independent of Britain, where all the US’s money goes.

/been reading old threads again

C.R.
7 years ago

Didn’t you just run a fundraiser?

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Nawh, he’s just a baby’s first debate. He’s too used to being the smartest one in the room and having his opinion taken as infallible. And then I come along with, um, the former without the later. In short, I’ve been around enough to appreciate having friends smart enough to go “you’re infuriatingly wrong and here’s why” whereas he wants to keep it all calm and logical.

If nothing else, I’ve managed to put him off PUA by pointing him towards standard self-improvement that isn’t seeped in misogyny.

Also, he was once a close friend, so I have personal reasons in addition to Duty Calls. And more to the point, he’s got an ASD (wording fail? sorry if so) and I’m not sure he gets how callous he sounds, even when it’s personal the most he can manage is “I should care, because it affects me, but in the grand scheme of things isn’t X more important?”. Meanwhile, I want to reach through the screen and strangle him.

He’s not even remotely as bad as Owly in other words. Owly probably thinks the holocaust was a good thing, whereas dude just thinks there are more important bad things to focus on and that somehow means we can’t still call the holocaust a bad thing.

To a degree, he’s right, current genocide is more important than past genocide, but all genocide is Very Very Bad, no matter how few people are killed. And that more people die of heart disease and cancer is entirely irrelevant to the intentional targeting if minorities. (He really has trouble with the idea that we all die eventually and this is a good things.)

Hey kitteh, do you mind if I try explaining your marital status to him? He’ll probably just get all “the afterlife cannot be scientifically proven” but it’s worth a shot I guess…I get really annoyed at the idea of being stuck in this body forever, and he just gets all “oh we’ll be downloads someday” and it turns into a Doctor Who plot and he won’t watch it and seems to like the idea of being a cyber because he’s never seen wtf “unaging robotic body with controlled emotions that say everyone should be upgraded” actually looks like. (*is totally serious*)

Sorry, I’m ranting, I’m into the whiskey and should stop ranting >.<

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

FYI, that’s part of why I love you guys. Being the smartest person in the room is no good for one’s ego, nor one’s intelligent. No one learns anything if they’re never challenged. And advanced degrees are not required here, views that I am not familiar with are wtf I mean.

…I’m drunk dialing the internet, great >.<

titianblue
titianblue
7 years ago

If we’re going to post Bollywood videos, you can’t not have the divine Hrithik, here in the absurd yet strangely addictive Dhoom2

Haven’t seen White Rainbow but can recommend Water, also relating to the treatment of widows. Lots of trigger warnings on it though.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Argenti – go for it! 😀 We’d love to hear the results (to pinch a line from the Queen, “we, and by that I mean both of us”). Feel free to give him the link to our blog, if you want. He can’t go leaving random comments on it, I moderate everything bwahahahaha.

If he’s on the ASD spectrum, among other things (would I be right to guess somewhat sheltered by age/socio-economic background?) then it certainly adds a level of “more understandable” to the “strangle through screenARRRRRRGH” stuff. Having a genuine barrier to getting it on a deeper level than the intellectual* rather than Being A Privileged Prat makes a difference, at least for me reading from this distance!

Wanting to go cyber? Hasn’t he WATCHED the Cybermen episodes? Being stuck earthside forever, yuck yuck yuck. And downloads? Strewth, now he’s channelling AntZ! 😛

Funny you should ask about the marital situation, my doc appt went way overtime tonight ‘cos she wanted to hear all about how we met! 😀

Instant cure for being-smartest-person-in-room ego: cats. Totally unimpressed. You have opposable thumbs, yes? Then stop wasting time and open that tin. Or door. Or fridge. Or turn on that tap. Or scritch my ears/neck/belly. Or toss that toy for me. Make yourself useful, tailless creature.

Hmmm … do your fish (I’m thinking of the dreaded plec mostly) give off “you don’t impress me, human” vibes on occasion?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

It’s funny to see how quickly the standard in Bollywood stars went from curvy for women and a bit chubby for men to super buffed for everyone.

It always amuses me when skimpy clothes and everything-but-kissing is OK, but actual kissing is not. You get this in K-pop too. This is one of my favorite K-pop earworms, but what’s funny about it is that the whole video is girls shaking their asses in tiny hotpants and pretty boy eye candy posing by the pool in swimwear, but they edited out the chaste little kiss at the end because THAT would be going too far.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Plec invented “you do not amuse me” — he can upset the entire tank with one cranky outburst (please knock and wait and then open the door sloooooowly, because he really is that touchy!)

And nope, no Doctor Who, it’s fiction. Not sure dude really gets how much of his transhumanism is influenced by sci-fi.

Yep to privileged, family’s middle class, he’s just over 25 with a degree, white, straight, cis…basically got life set to easy mode other than ASD. Which is certainly not “life handed to him” but he fits in well enough to often just come off as one of those pretentious nerdy types. Usually I don’t want to strangle him for being wrong, but for assuming he’s right (the Dunning-Kruger is so strong he’s specifically said it doesn’t apply to his transhumanist guru)

I’ll explain you and your King and drop a link next time he’s around and not infuriating me. Maybe he can at least manage to step outside his little “science is the height of existence” bubble. Honestly, capital a Atheists annoy me more than religious people who are neither proselytizing nor dangerously conservative. Science can’t explain everything, at least not yet, and insisting it has will only limit future discovery…not to mention piss off people who hold harmless but unprovable beliefs. Eg my father insists the house is haunted and blames the ghost for everything and this is all dandy until he tries to insist I admit it was the ghost when I’m entirely sure it was me (that tng that fell? GHOST! Um no, I bumped it)

Hey Pecunium, yes this is Yudkowsky boy.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Honestly, capital a Atheists annoy me more than religious people who are neither proselytizing nor dangerously conservative. Science can’t explain everything, at least not yet, and insisting it has will only limit future discovery…not to mention piss off people who hold harmless but unprovable beliefs. Eg my father insists the house is haunted and blames the ghost for everything and this is all dandy until he tries to insist I admit it was the ghost when I’m entirely sure it was me (that tng that fell? GHOST! Um no, I bumped it)

THIS, so much.

Years ago, when I was agnostic-bordering-on-atheist, I subscribed briefly to the Australian Sceptics magazine. Didn’t last long, because I got pissed off really quickly with their self-congratulatory, smug, aren’t-we-the-clever-boys’-club attitude and put-downs of any and all non-atheist beliefs. They were the types who were less sceptics than cynics: everyone but atheists were charlatans or gullible, there was no possibility of them being wrong, etc, etc.

And it wasn’t half as toxic and uninformed as the internet would prove to be … shudder.

Yes, so much, to science-doesn’t-know-everything yet (and will it ever know everything? Seriously?)

With beliefs, it’s a simple enough thing for me: is it helping or harming? Is it toxic or life-affirming? It’s what I said to my shrink re: Mr K. I’ve had plenty of doubts about the reality of it all, but even if it were my imagination, I’m hugely happier living this way than I was six-seven years ago. Though after all these years and other people’s validation (if that’s the word) I think it’d be stretching it to say it’s imagination.

I would bet the ghost in your house is a CAT POLTERGEIST messin’ with your minds. Because it can. (Ha, you thought you knocked that thing down, human? I was there a whisker of a millisecond before you!)

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Hey, the blockquote monster left me alone for once! 😛

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

A friend of mine insists that her parents house has ghost cats. She would see them out of the corner of her eye late at night.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Proof, proof I tell ya!

http://youtu.be/vehAyOFIicc

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Ghost cats sound so much better than ghost stuffed monkeys. You know the creepy clapper monkeys? With one of those turning up in weird places I can almost understand why the richie richs my aunt works for don’t spend more time in that house. Now that place makes my hair stand up, if this house has a ghost it’s harmless. My father’s all “wait til you look up and see him standing there” and I have all I can do sometimes not to say “I’d rather see an elderly dentist than either rapist ex”. Ghosts, totally less terrifying than flashbacks.

As for science, I really doubt we’ll ever know everything, but even believers of the singularity ought to admit we don’t know everything yet. Frankly I like guessing which deeply held believe will be the next “the sun revolves around the earth” or “the earth is flat”. Penis v vagina is the be all and end all of gender? I keep thinking it’d be bigger than that, but that other thread is right, neither genetics, nor biology, nor presentation, nor self-image is that simple. Maybe we are just doing it completely wrong.

“With beliefs, it’s a simple enough thing for me: is it helping or harming? Is it toxic or life-affirming? It’s what I said to my shrink re: Mr K. I’ve had plenty of doubts about the reality of it all, but even if it were my imagination, I’m hugely happier living this way than I was six-seven years ago. Though after all these years and other people’s validation (if that’s the word) I think it’d be stretching it to say it’s imagination.”

Exactly, nothing personal here, but I neither know nor care if you’re shacking up with a centuries old French King. You’re happy, no one’s getting hurt, so you know what? It doesn’t matter either way. I have an overarching philosophy of: “not hurting anyone? makes you happy? well enjoy then!”

Funny, this is part of what I like about the not-an-ex, we met as psych undergrads, in research methods no less. Zir math is impressive, zir science quite solid, and yet, we’re both various strains of pagan. I absolutely adore a having someone to talk to who loves science, understands empirical evidence and gathering it, and knows when to go “yeah fuck that”

Science stops being right when it’s speculative and hurting people. All the “unproven to exist” things, like Mr. K’s existance, well, you don’t prove that something doesn’t exist by proving that you can’t prove it exists…and at sentence is gibberish! Using Mr. K as a science example:

Null hypothesis: Mr. K does not exist, at least not outside his grave
Test hypothesis: Mr. K continues to exist
*do science* we cannot prove the test hypothesis! Dandy, that doesn’t mean the null hypothesis is correct!

Granted science land would reverse those, say you have to prove that Mr. K does exist. But science and fallacies combined…I’m too drunk to reconcile that, I was just trying to make sense of my horrible sentence!

Anyone want some whiskey? It’s Irish, not French, but maybe we can get a certain French king to deliver it around?

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Oh gods, it’s a Bengal! The narcissist ex has one, people would think I was some sort of freak for asking if they checked the cabinet before closing the door, and a good percent of the time when they hadn’t, there was a very cranky cat waiting to dart out from behind the door (if it latched, otherwise you’d just hear a door fly open, an doom just in time to catch a tail flying out of sight)

Gods did she love the fish tanks…all those noises and tubes and vibrations…she never managed to even notice the fish, the filter was too interesting! (This is good, I was really worried she might actually be able to efficiently fish)

They’re total and complete little smarty pants goofs in other words. All that smart, but wrapped up in the curious little body of a kitty. Never ever leave the fridge open even a crack!

Bee
Bee
7 years ago

There totally are ghost cats! That would explain why the pugs suddenly go crazy and start barking for no reason.

Susan Jane Gilman
Susan Jane Gilman
7 years ago

You have made my day. Not only I am extremely grateful for your blog, your conscience, and your vigilance in the face of all sorts of misogyny and hatefulness — but I absolutely love Shah Rhuk Khan and this scene. I watch it whenever I’m in a horrific mood. Both you and Bollywood are a ray of light in any often insane world Take some time, recuperate, breathe deep, and do your own equivalent of a dance on top of a train. I have to take a break sometimes myself from my own work, or it simply gets to be too much. Thanks for the clip and the updates. Hats off, Darlin’.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Ok, I’m drunk enough I just nearly split my drink on the iPad. I’m going to bed before I ruin something, g’night!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

AAAAAHHHHH I can’t stand those clapper monkeys, especially after reading the Stephen King short story!

“Exactly, nothing personal here, but I neither know nor care if you’re shacking up with a centuries old French King. You’re happy, no one’s getting hurt, so you know what? It doesn’t matter either way. I have an overarching philosophy of: “not hurting anyone? makes you happy? well enjoy then!””

Exactly, lol! I appreciate that everyone here is courteous enough to either chat just like they would about any other regular’s spouse they’ll prolly never meet, or simply ignore the subject, regardless of their own beliefs. It’s one of the many things I really value about this place. I felt a lot more comfortable when I was able to say (LBT I owes ya) what our situation is, and not feel like I was lying by omission any more.

Plus, hell, we’ve prolly all a few beliefs that others would disagree with, or not understand, or whatevs, but it still comes down to how you just described it.

LOL LOL I love the rest of your paragraphs about hypotheses and whiskey and all. Mr K’s leaning over my shoulder grumbling “Am I a messenger boy?” (Can one grumble while grinning? He seems to be managing.)

😀

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Niters, Argenti, and welcome Susan Jane Gilman! 🙂

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

I’m with Argenti – don’t really care whether or not things are real unless the not-realness is causing some sort of harm. Actually, remember when someone (I think it was one of Mr Al’s socks) tried to dig at Kittehs by being all, omg you are holding a dead king in non-consensual sexual slavery! But it was obviously meant to be a not-real dig. Thing is, if not real, where’s the harm? It was one of my favorite examples of how bad the trolls here ar at their goal of upsetting people, because as digs go that was about as potentially hurtful as being gnawed on by a toothless kitten.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I don’t know if that was one of Mr Al’s socks, David banned his arse* after he pulled that one, and he’d only posted a couple of times, so we never got to explore the issue. Yeah, I thought that effort was really funny/baffling too – it was the dumbest effort (if genuine) and Pecunium’s “if so, then this; if not, then that” takedown was a thing of beauty.

*and the rest of him, mercifully

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Though I should say I did ask David to ban him, not because it was hurtful but because the attempted personal attack was over the line generally.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

It really is funny how bad they are at riling people up. I think it’s that their social skills are so bad that they can’t figure out what people’s sort spots are, so they don’t know what to aim for.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

Sore spots, not sort.

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