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antifeminism creep-shaming creepy homophobia incoherent rage men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny okcupid penises PUA the c-word

How not to impress the ladies on OkCupid

cupids2

So @catches_stars on Twitter is pretty hilarious. She’s also got an OkCupid account, and regularly posts snippets of her conversations with some of the more problematic dudes who contact her, some on her main Twitter account and some on @okcupid_TXT. With her permission, and because I’m too lazy to actually write a post today, I’m passing along a few of my favorites.

This overeager fellow has a rather sudden change of heart when his stated plan runs into an obstacle, that obstacle being that @catches_stars finds him completely repulsive.

okeager

This guy is either totally high or trying some weird and misguided PUA wizardry on her. (It does not succeed.)

oksecret

This foot-obsessed fellow spammed her with the same message from several different accounts.

oktoes

This guy, who seems to be shirtless in his profile pic, gets what I assume is, to him, a very disappointing answer.

okbody

As does this fellow.

okchicks

Romance is hard.

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Some Gal Not Bored at All

@cloudiah

We have press-on nails for my cat. No one has thus far been brave enough to try to put them on her. Maybe I could subtly insult her normal nails and get her to want to impress me? I am sure all the scratching and biting is just a shit test anyway.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Cats are expert neggers. The back turned, the bare tilt of the ears – “I know you’re talkng to/about me but this is all the acknowledgement you’re getting” – the LOOK, the Big Ignore … oh yes. PUAs got nuttin’ on kitties.

Charles Miller
11 years ago

I think @Martyn is in for a bit of a shock when he graduates and discovers how popular Apple gear is with IT pros. It’s reached the point where you get strange looks if you’re the guy who showed up to a conference -without- a Mac laptop.

Then again, I suspect that’s the least of the shocks the adult world has waiting for him.

titianblue
titianblue
11 years ago

Also the tail flip – the feline equivalent of giving you the finger …

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Oh god yes, the tail flip!

I wonder if the digital salute started life as someone imitating a tail flip …

@Charles Miller – I think you nailed it about shocks and the adult world.

cloudiah
11 years ago

My cats do a lot of kino too. Hazel started biting my toes this morning because apparently I wasn’t quick enough with the cat food. So I looked right at her and said, “Nice outfit. I’m pretty sure I saw another kitty wearing the exact same thing.”

Baroncognito
11 years ago

Kino? The only thing I associate that word with is cinema.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Martyn

To understand why you are getting the response you are about teaching shallow people a lesson, you might want to start by reading the comments here:
http://manboobz.com/2013/02/14/the-ultimate-nice-guy-tm-makes-a-music-video/

There is a lot, especially by CassandraSays iirc, defending women’s right to be shallow. Men have the same right.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

Too bad there isn’t a way of tagging the comments when we’ve done a subject to death so that we can just send newbies and trolls there. It would be like the FAQ people have brought up, but more communal.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

You didn’t tell I was being deliberately facetious? Shame on you!

Martyn: put a sock in it, for real. If you want to have any kind of lifespan around here that doesn’t involve treating you like the creepy troll I’m starting to think you are, shut the hell up, read old threads, and maybe use the Google to learn about the things we talk about. This is not a 101 site, we’re familiar with game, and most of DO NOT have the patience to hold your hand and spoon feed you knowledge.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Ah yes, shallowness. The dudes who expect supermodels, and complain about any women who dare appear in public not fully made up and groomed, but also complain about women being “shallow” for spending time on their appearance and – horror of horrors – having preferences about men’s looks and wanting to see them groomed as well.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

This is not a 101 site, we’re familiar with game, and most of DO NOT have the patience to hold your hand and spoon feed you knowledge.

I am in a weird mood and feeling charitable. If anyone finds my teacher-voiced* explanations to Martyn annoying, though, I’ll cut it out.

*Hopefully, easy and just this side of condescending.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

I don’t, Some Gal. I’m still giving him some benefit of the doubt, though my patience is wearing thin. I’m partly trying to get it through his thick skull and partly putting it on record here that he’s been TOLD, so he can’t come back later doing the troll-with-short-term-memory-loss thing.

cloudiah
11 years ago

@Baroncognito, about kino,Read it and upchuck.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Some Gal: it’s fine if you feel like educating him. I’m pretty much through with dudes like him.

Creative Writing Student
Creative Writing Student
11 years ago

Right. Kino. Creepy touching. Brrrr.

cloudiah
11 years ago

Or if you REALLY want to hurl, go go here. CONTENT WARNING for really rape-y definition.

cloudiah
11 years ago

I wasn’t really trying to say you should “go go” anywhere. Dancing is totally optional.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Kino, aka how to get an elbow to your face. It wouldn’t produce the sort of arousal they’re after, in me. I doubt it would in anyone … I mean from someone you really fancy, sure, but from a creepy* stranger? Gross.

*if they’re PUAs trying this on, they’re self-branded as creepy

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Just as well go-go is optional, my knees aren’t up to it!

They can’t get over the idea of physical play having to be about dominance, can they? It’s both rapey and scary, and pathetic and insecure.

Martyn Hare
11 years ago

@Some Gal:

Thanks for the link.

Sorry, I didn’t make my argument clear enough. The “right to be shallow” alone is not the issue with the service, the right to exclude people from interacting with a large set of people based on shallowness is the problem.

The service I was on about allows a small number of people to exclude a person from the rest of the members who have not seen the person’s pictures based entirely on looks. Imagine running a nightclub, where random people already inside the nightclub determine whether those others who have not already attended the nightclub can be allowed access purely based on a quality which is non-quantifiable and arbitrary.

What I don’t get is why I seem to encounter so many personal attacks when discussing theory.

@hellkell:

That quote is unrelated to what I said about the game. It’s related to my bad IT joke.

If you want to have any kind of lifespan around here that doesn’t involve treating you like the creepy troll I’m starting to think you are, shut the hell up, read old threads, and maybe use the Google to learn about the things we talk about.

I spent years reading materials (in an almost dedicated fashion) about the game before calling bullshit on it. I don’t think I need to do any more learning about it. I explained the theory and did not pass judgement on it despite knowing the drawbacks; because although looking at simple sociological studies lets you easily see through it, a theory is a theory.

What people have done with the theory is not relevant to the theory itself. For those who think my explanation has too much positive bias, try checking the definition of Eugenics. A theory separated from human action always appears positive.

Before anyone says I shouldn’t mention it because they’re familiar with it, consider the fact that others might not really know, even if you do.

Martyn Hare
11 years ago

Warning: My comment is outdated. Did not see comments since.

Baroncognito
11 years ago

I’m going to stick with Kino referring to a movie theatre and continue calling the other thing “Inappropriate touching.”

Baroncognito
11 years ago

Imagine running a nightclub, where random people already inside the nightclub determine whether those others who have not already attended the nightclub can be allowed access purely based on a quality which is non-quantifiable and arbitrary.

Okay. How is this nightclub different from all other nightclubs? (And it’s not even pesach)

SpleenyBaggage
SpleenyBaggage
11 years ago

One internet plus one fluffy kitten chasing a butterfly to you for that Kino reference, Baroncognito.