So @catches_stars on Twitter is pretty hilarious. She’s also got an OkCupid account, and regularly posts snippets of her conversations with some of the more problematic dudes who contact her, some on her main Twitter account and some on @okcupid_TXT. With her permission, and because I’m too lazy to actually write a post today, I’m passing along a few of my favorites.
This overeager fellow has a rather sudden change of heart when his stated plan runs into an obstacle, that obstacle being that @catches_stars finds him completely repulsive.
This guy is either totally high or trying some weird and misguided PUA wizardry on her. (It does not succeed.)
This foot-obsessed fellow spammed her with the same message from several different accounts.
This guy, who seems to be shirtless in his profile pic, gets what I assume is, to him, a very disappointing answer.
As does this fellow.
Romance is hard.
Happy birthday emilygoddess!
Relieved that I apparently missed an ableism shitstorm on this thread…fighting the urge to go back and read out of curiosity…
I spent the past few days in Vermont, so I’m not too sad to have missed the ableism shitstorm. (I am boggled by the number of people who don’t seem to realize that when Scrooge said, “If they’re going to die, then they had better do it, and reduce the surplus population!” he was being characterized as a GIANT ASSHAT.)
I am armed with new pants that fit me! Which might end up a loss, since I’m going cold turkey off my hormones today. : I guess we’ll see if I end up on yet ANOTHER bout of, “You don’t fit anything”
@MKlein
Not just an ableism shitstorm, a flat-out defense of eugenics capped off by declaring us all too emotional to talk logically. I think Martyn stands a decent shot at TOTY and it is only March!
I gave in to curiosity.
Also, both those videos.
I had seen the Count one before, but not in a while, and the cat yodeling one was totally new to me 🙂
@ LBT – good luck!
@Some Gal – you know, not that there aren’t racist and/or ableist feminists out there too, but I’m always surprised why it’s not more obvious to people how racist and ableist the Man-o-sphere and its trolls get; there really seems to be a huge rate of overlap.
surprised *that* it’s not more obvious
@Some Gal – I’m holding on to a pair of black jeans that I LOVED even though they’re not in very good shape, because they fit well and made me feel good when I wore them. Sadly I had bought another pair in the same style, same brand, and they’re not the same.
@MKlein
Don’t forget the homophobia! (Martyn displayed a lot more of that in the thread he first popped up in.) None of it is exactly subtle, is it? With the MRM co-opting social justice terms, it just gets more obvious and obnoxious.
I think we are just used to racism, ableism and homophobia at a cultural level and also for looking for any way to excuse it. I told my mom (who is rather racist, ableist, and homophobic herself) about Martyn and his defense of eugenics and she kept asking if maybe I just misunderstood him or if maybe he meant something else. Benefit of the doubt is always given to the non-oppressed. It sucks.
@drst
Someone knows my pain! 🙂
“Was the one you were thinking of the one with the 50% of men asking for custody of the 50% of the men who divorce (and on and on)? I remember it and it seems recent and don’t mind looking again, but want to make sure I am looking for the right thing.”
Yep and I checked all the recent threads and can’t find it, so I assume it must’ve been on a necro’ed thread, but the browser history on the iPad sucks.
“Custody stats?
Women are more likely to ask for custody. And fathers who ask for custody (and don’t give up) are very likely to get either sole or joint custody:
http://www.amptoons.com/blog/files/Massachusetts_Gender_Bias_Study.htm
Just some statistics I found.”
W00t, more statistics! I’ll always take more for my collection, makes dealing with the repeat claims easier.
@Cloudiah, I don’t know your friend obviously but I agree with everyone who talked about choices being potentially paralysing. Back when I was really in it, if you said “let’s go for brunch either Saturday or Sunday this week” I would have skipped it entirely rather than climb the mountain that was picking :).
I would also say if he’s like me, you might want to make it as low-effort as possible for him. Say you’ll pick him up and drop him off, for example. I’d be thinking “to go out with Awesome Friend Cloudiah I have to wake up at a certain time, choose an outfit (and potentially wash clothes in order to do it), brush my teeth and stuff, shower, and then I have to find this place and get in the car and drive there and park in the parking lot and I AM NOT A SUPERHERO FORGET ALL OF IT.”
Re: weekend, me and boyfriend are going to do some trip planning 😀 we’re almost definitely seeing Scotland this year.
@Argenti
I believe I have found it!
http://manboobz.com/2013/02/09/ineedmasculismbecause-nothing-is-funnier-than-mras-sincerely-trying-to-explain-their-dumb-beliefs-to-the-world/#comment-263330
That is probably the wrong comment linked, but right thread. (I just copy-pasted the address from my history, which could be any comment.)
Because having someone having emotions about their oppression is impossible to predict and a terrible thing.
Well, if nothing else Martyn is providing an excellent demonstration of the fact that the people who teach Game are not actually able to teach social skills, or improve men’s ability to successfully interact with women.
The stamina the regulars have demonstrated here while dealing with whats-his-name has been incredible. I’d buy everyone a Gatorade if I could.
Some Gal — that’s it, thank you!
I will happily go makeup shopping with cloudiah, hellkell, and Nobinayamu anytime.
On bra care – I just wash mine in the washing machine. Usually in lingerie nets to protect the underwires – the nets that I use are specifically made for bras, they’re sort of cube shaped so the bra can’t move around and each bra gets its own net.
This is what the nets look like, btw. I buy mine at the Japanese dollar store.
http://image.dhgate.com/albu_181459295_00/1.0×0.jpg
@CassandraSays
Is it floppy or does it stand up? I have one of these and it only half-heartedly has any structure to it. It seems like what you have, but a bunch in a row. I like it fine, though. It is good for not losing Nintendo Wiimote straps, too. 🙂
@Argenti
So glad I could help!
Once you’ve used it a couple of times it doesn’t stand up any more, but it does prevent the bras from tangling with anything, which seems to be what kills the underwires.
@some gal: *envy*. I’m horrible at bra shopping, even after my mom took me to a store where they actually checked my size, which helped loads. I was too whole cup sizes off :/ I normally try to get most of my clothes from goodwill, but I’m guessing it’d be next to impossible to get a bra there, even if it’s not that good.
@cassandrasays
When you use that bra holder thingie, do you take let them air dry or stick them in the dryer? Curious, because if it saves the underwires in the wash, it looks super hand 😀
* handy.
triple posting because of typos :/
@Marie
My mom and I have a complicated relationship (she can be really horrible), but I will be forever grateful that she keeps me in underwire. (Rather unfortunate underwear, too, but that is pretty nice to have occasionally.)