In not-quite spring, a young MRA’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love, and how women are all a bunch of moneygrubbing whores that get uglier and uglier as they get older.
Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, discussions of marriage are busting out all over, like the buds of new spring flowers or the skidmarks in an MRA’s underpants. The fellows are not too keen on this whole marriage thing, which is an obvious female trick to rob men of their money and sperm and tie them to rapidly depreciating assets (women) who are only going to get uglier as time goes by.
In one thread, a fellow named wrez shares these thoughts, to much acclaim (or at least a few dozen upvotes):
In another, a fellow named rathum2323 suggests that any women interested in marriage is clearly up to something nefarious.
All that said, I am pleased that Reddit MRAs are managing to convince their friends not to marry. Because if you’re someone who turns to MRAs for marriage advice, it’s probably best for all concerned that you never marry anyone or anything.
Pulsating sea cucumbers?
::dies::
Some Gal – “Back on-topic (sort of), my grandparents stayed in hotels together before they married. I doubt they were going to a neighboring town to sight-see.”
Depends on what sights we’re talking about. 😉
Brz was the faux-Frenchman. NNY is probably B_don, and Dragon Slayer is Arks. Mismatched socks the lot.
Enslaving and selling people is the oldest profession and there was sex outside of marriage long before there was such a thing as marriage else none of us would be here.
Reconciled, for what it is worth.
Would specialised or skilled toolmaking not be one of the oldest “professions”? Something where there was a trade of some sort … not sure it could be called a profession in a pre-cash society. How far back does slavery or a slave trade go? I guess we can’t really know with a lot of activities, because if they’re prehistoric there’s not enough/any evidence.
/thinking aloud
Not sure that’d fit within the MRA parallel dimension, but sadly, yes, that reconciles it.
And thanks for the troll clarification, weird having so many returning socks at once.
Here’s one concept of marriage:
We men are willing to trade our money (lifeblood) in exchange for beauty, love, and sex…There is nothing wrong with wanting something beautiful that puts out and actually cares for you.
Here’s another:
Take your pick.
I missed so many posts in between what I last read and what I wrote. *face-palm* BTW, I am totally ignoring the OP because it’s both predictably pathetic and really quite revolting.
A lot of the reasons people are bringing up here *are* social or governmental, though. From “no visitation rights” (my mother wasn’t allowed to visit or identify my father when he died in 1986 because they weren’t married, gotta love that one) to feeling marriage will make your relationship more real.
That does not mean I’m opposed to marriage on an individual level by any means. Gay marriage always makes me so happy – partially because most of the baggage associated with marriage is stripped away by the lack of “man and wife” – and I’m aware I’m not normal in feeling weirded out by expressing such intensity of feeling as dedicating your life to another person in front of YOUR WHOLE FAMILY AND FRIENDS? *shudder*
I just think marriage as an institution needs a massive rethink. I think we need to divorce the legalities from the label, as “marriage” is so closely tied with religion. Civil unions for law: whatever the fuck you want to call it +/- religion on a social level.
And yeah, parties to celebrate happy things are definitely needed more in life. Just gotta tease away all the fucked up things as best we can (so very many fucked up things associated with marriage, particularly straight marriage.)
Wut? Nooo. Marriage has traditionally been “we’re officially in an exclusive relationship [FOREVER]” whereas now it’s most “we’ve decided we want to be in this relationship FOREVER”. Doesn’t at all preclude being in love first! Kinda requires being in love first.
I personally am not a fan of “forever” so much as “indefinitely”, but I’m excessively pragmatic that way. Marriage has kinda grown on me as a maybe, but I still wouldn’t want to promise forever (to my partner of 9 1/2 years) because I’d rather we split up if we weren’t happy. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t do everything I could to make it work.
Mmmm. I don’t know how I feel about that. Some of it appeals. The part where a certificate is required to make your relationship count is where I get squirmy. Also, poly relationships are a thing. FLDS bullshit aside, as that is blatantly non-consensual and horrific.
I really don’t know what would work with multiple partners and/or parents in law. I deeply resent that I’m not allowed two fathers on my birth certificate. My father who raised me is my *father* and I’d like to have him on there. But not at the expense of my father who loved me very much and had the poor fortune to die on me.
*clears throat* Back to paperwork. I am a great fan of the de facto relationship status in NZ. It means if my partner goes to hospital or dies, I *count*. And vice-versa. No paperwork (or money spent on such) required!
Isn’t the oldest profession gathering fruits, nuts and berries?
Money is “lifeblood”? Tell that to someone dying of cancer.
Cried big, sappy tears watching your video, Shaenon.
@hrovitnir
If I’m reading you right, I think we feel the same way about announcing something personal and private in front of friends and family. It just feels wrong. No one else agrees with me though and, in the theoretical event we did end up marrying because we needed the benefits, I’ve had friends invite themselves to a nice dinner we evidently need to have and the boyfriend’s mother said she completely understood my wanting it to be just the two of us, but of course she would be invited, right?
No one seems to get that public declarations and family just don’t go in my mind with what I have with the boyfriend. (We share family, but it isn’t like something we affirm with them there. We live it, if that makes sense.)
Also, we’ll have been together 9 years soon. Kinda cool that you are on your 9th year too. (Not to ignore the 6 month part.)
The “Oldest” profession is real estate – sorry, shelter acquisition. Although I’d accept “Livelihood improvement through survival aids” for partial credit. q:
Well, it could be kind of like how wills work. If you don’t have one, then there are processes for how it’s handled – next of kin etc. So if you wanted to be defacto and not have a contract then that’s up to you. But if you are going to have a contract (which is what you sign when you get married) then you should be able to make that contract with whoever you want, regardless of romantic/sexual interaction with them. And you should think about how you would like it to differ from the default, just like when making a will.
And if you are poly, that’s just a different contract, and more complicated to work out the details as I’m sure poly people know. Just like you can have a contract between 2 business partners, or multiple. Or have different contracts between different people – as long as they didn’t contradict each other, then I don’t see why not.
The problem is when people say you have to have a specific *kind* of relationship with someone for them to be your partner. Maybe if we could normalise and give legal standing to being “platonic life partners” these MGTOW really would go.
You are reading me right, Some Gal Not Bored at All 😀
I totally feel your approach… the whole “but I’m coming right?” makes me cringe so bad. I’m lucky to have minimal interfering family from either side, I am super uncomfortable with the little I do have to deal with.
Matching years is cool! 6 months is no biggy, it’s an approximate date anyway (not quite sure how one has an exact date unless they are married. *shrug*)
@hrovitnir
We celebrate on the anniversary of our first date. Works as well as anything else.
(Something else strange about marriage to me – you start the count over and pick a new date. Why?)
Haha! Yes, I’d like something like the above. I’d like to have something like defacto there anyway though – not sure how you’d write it to make it workable for poly relationships… the whole visiting rights/parenthood thing.
But yes, having relationships be open to interpretation and having contracts be common would be cool. Would require a hell of a lot of social change though!
Who knew my wife was just trying to sperm jack me?! All these years…damn you darling!
This might be a bit late, but someone said earlier about Helen of Troy being an instigating factor of the Trojan War. Actually, historians are finding that it seems that Helen of Troy is more or less complete bullshit Homer made up to make the war sound more interesting. They’re saying it’s more likely that the Trojan War was just caused by Greeks being annoyed by having to pay tolls to Troy for sailing around their waters. So yeah. The one war that anyone could argue was “for women” probably wasn’t actually over women at all.
No, no, no! That’s just girly stuff. The oldest profession is hunting mammoth!
OMG Homer was an MRA!
And subtle but important point, I feel:
fighting a war over women =/= fighting a war for the women.
In the latter, the women asked/made the men do it (i.e. never happened), in the former, the women were reduced to objects that the men fought over ( like land, water, resources – happens all the time).
No MRA ever seems to grasp the difference.
I’ve actually gotten the question from a colleague why we got married since we don’t have kids (certain legal stuff with kids get easier here if you’re married, so lots of people choose to get married for that reason before their second kid). Well, we felt that we had found the love of our life, that it was special and nothing like anything we’ve had before, and we sort of wanted to celebrate this with a big ceremony and party. That’s the big reason, I guess. Everyone is free to think this is a stupid reason and nothing that applies to THEM, but people should still respect this as OUR decision.
Bah, Feminism has destroyed the sanctity of marriage in the First World/ the West…
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/peggy-drexler/the-scarlet-manifesto-the_b_1963499.html
http://www.medicaldaily.com/articles/9925/20120517/relationships-marriage-cheating-infidelity-adultery.htm
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2145925/Women-beat-men-adultery-stakes-Ladies-2-3-secret-lovers-affair-compared-1-8-blokes.html
If this is what inevitably happens to a human society when it becomes “developed” or “liberalized”, then it only proves that MGTOW is the only sane and sensible thing for any man with any self-love and self-respect to do. Man was not born to be cuckolded!
Dragon, here’s the attention you want: “Why any man would get married today is beyond me. I mean, in the past, sure, you needed that particular skeleton key to open the chastity belt. But ever since the lock was busted open in the ’70s, that hasn’t been the case. Weird.” Why would any woman get married at all these days when she doesn’t have to? Come on, you’re not this ignorant of human history and behaviors.
Ew, abnoy.
Anyway, what are these “government support groups” exactly? For an international feminist conspiracy you’d need quite a few.
Personally, I rather like the idea of a sham/crafty marriage, for citizenship/benefits. Blame an older but certainly not wiser friend for putting the idea in my head. Also centrelink. If I do this, would I be the government money-grubber, and a dude? THE MISANDRY CUTS BOTH WAYS!
You’re right, Abnoy. Men aren’t born. Being a subset of adult humans, it would be extremely difficult for men to be born. Confucius may have managed this feat, but it seems to have been an isolated incident.