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awesome MRA neckbeard rights parody

Shampoo away the grey with Just for Men’s Rights Activists

aandYvf

MRAs can now shampoo away the grey in their neckbeards in just five minutes with Just For Men’s Rights Activists special neckbeard formula gel! Now with a new, angrier formula!

I found this faux trading card on Reddit’s AgainstMensRights subreddit, which is devoted to skewering the MensRights subreddit. The OP says his girlfriend got it at an art show, but alas I do not know where that show was or from whom she got it.

Click on the pic for a bigger version, in which you can see that this formula comes in Fedora Brown, and was “voted best for neckbeards by a panel of elder misogynists.”

Ironically, the beards depicted on real Just for Men boxes aren’t much more believable than the one on the parody box.

Also ironically, I am sporting a bit of a neckbeard today. No bulging veins in my forehead, though.

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Nobinayamu
Nobinayamu
11 years ago

Congratulations, Falconer!

Shadow
Shadow
11 years ago

@Falconer

Congratulations, you sly rascal!! So happy for you guys

clairedammit
clairedammit
11 years ago

Congratulations, Falconer and Beloved. I’m so happy for you both!

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Congratulations Falconer!

Re Ozy:s post, I wasn’t really thinking about the post zie linked to, more about what zie wrote herself. As soon as you start using physical characteristics to insult people, I think it’s really easy to slip into simply insulting people for being ugly, having bad taste, or being dorky in some way, despite the fact that they haven’t done anything morally wrong.

I DO think this tends to happen with the term “nice guy” in many contexts as well though, It’s not that people use it for minor moral wrongs as well as big moral wrongs – I have no problem with that – but people often use it for stuff that isn’t morally wrong at all as well. Such as having an unhappy crush at your female friend, not daring to tell her about it and sulking in private about this unhappy crush. Lots of people (including women) have been in this situation, and the fact that you’re too insecure to tell someone about the crush you have and feel bad about being unhappily in love DOESN’T MAKE YOU A BAD PERSON. But it does seem really common to slide from talking about entitlement in the sense of actually despising someone for not loving you back, to merely talking about feeling shitty about being unhappily in love, as if these were even comparable.

Anyway, re “Fedoras of OKcupid”, you can just check out that page yourselves and immediately you find not just awful guys but also guys who merely seem dorky. IT’S NOT OKAY TO BULLY PEOPLE FOR BEING DORKY.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Haven’t time to do a long post, but there’s a difference between a “nice guy” and NiceGuy(TM) – the latter is pretty specific about the entitled, blaming, stalkerish creeps who are not in fact any sort of friends to women, and not any sort of nice person. They’re putting in kindness coins and expecting sex in return, and when it doesn’t eventuate they whine about being friendzoned. They fail at basic decency because they expect cookies for it – specifically, they don’t seem to think there is any reason to be friends with women; we exist to put out and we’re wronging them when we don’t. We’re also wrong for not being mind readers. It’s not the same as the behaviour you mentioned, Dvarghundspossen.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Yeah, I think ozy’s post only works if you assume that people often use the term Nice Guy to refer to guys who’re actually nice guy. Which a. isn’t true and b. is a thing that sexist dudes like to pretend is true, so I’m side-eyeing that post a bit.

Abnoy
Abnoy
11 years ago

“A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.”

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=just%20friends

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

…Why exactly could this not happen the other way around? In fact, I’ve seen it like that. The “just friends” “applicant” is, of course, missing rather a vital qualification – sexual/romantic attraction. It’d be like me applying for a carpentry job with a resume that’s just about perfect for a beginner, but with my diploma in Music (Technical Production) rather than carpentry and the only relevant qualifications being the low pass I got in the one high school woodwork course I was required to take, and then complaining I don’t get the job.

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

Also @aworldanon

It’s not advised for the face, but if you’re stubbly and just want to cut back a few neck hairs, dry shaving carefully with multi-bladed razor works quite nicely for me (I might have very tough skin or something, but I doubt it). I just remove the very outer bits of my beard, and haven’t needed shaving foam in ages (I’ve used hot water occasionally but don’t need it)

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

Stretching the skin taut before dry-shaving helps too.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

I thought that “hey, fucking children isn’t illegal in my country, hur hur hur” Abnoy had been banned?

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

Not that I remember, but it’s so hard to keep track.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Not that I recall, I thought he’d just wandered off (probably hoping we’d forget) *not really here*

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Damn. I know there were plenty of calls for him to be banned last time.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Hey, question for moustache-wearers: does having facial hair make it harder to get rid of acquired facial cat furs? You know, the whole “pleh, pleh, pleh, SPLUT” thing.

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

I haven’t noticed that, but my elderly kitty likes to put his paw on the face of people he’s cuddling, and has trouble with retracting his claws, and once got a velcro-type seal with my beard. Only once, though.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Ouch!

Friend of mine had a cat called Velcro … I can’t remember the details but I think it involved her then-boyfriend and a non-detachable kitten.

I asked because I had a serious case of Inhale-a-Cat this morning after getting Maddie’s soft undercoat fur all over myself. I’ve noticed Louis do it on occasions (the pleh, pleh thing) with that lot over There, and he seems to have sprouted an extra ‘tache when he’s doing it, so I wondered if anyone else had that happen.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Look, I KNOW that “nice guy TM” isn’t the same thing as a guy who’s nice, and Ozy knows this too. What I claim is that people sometimes seem to use “nice guy TM” or just “nice guy” with the “TM” implied about guys who merely crushes on a friend, is too insecure to tell her and feel shitty about that situation. These guys may or may not be nice people overall, but regardless, being in that situation doesn’t make you a bad person.

On this very blog I’ve seen people (don’t remember which members though) argue that a) most britpop lyrics feature a nice guy TM as the “I” of the song, and b) most romantic comedies have a nice guy TM as a lead. Really? How many britpop lyrics can you mention off the top of your heads where the “I” actually resents a female friend for not returning his affections, or is a misogynist? How many romcoms can you mention where this is the case? (I agree that there are lots of problematic PATTERNS in movies, like how often an average-looking guy end up with a Hollywood-attractive girl, or how often a girl gets to realise that she was dating a douchebag and that there was this great guy around all the time whom is really her true love etc… but this isn’t problematic in ITSELF, it’s just problematic that it’s a PATTERN that pops up over and over again in movies, and above all, it’s different from the male lead being an entitled piece of shit.) So yeah, it does seem to me as if people often slide from “it’s wrong to hate on your female friend for not returning your affection” to “it’s somehow wrong to be unhappily in love, too insecure to say anything about it and feeling shitty about that situation”. And from “bullying misogynists” to “bullying anyone I find dorky/ugly/pathetic” (as is evidenced by just flipping through “fedoras of OKcupid”).

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

And btw, just because I think the term Nice Guy TM is often thrown around too loosely doesn’t mean I don’t agree with the rest of the regulars here that the Abnoy quote is horrible and reveals a horrible view on women.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

I don’t think anyone here is unclear on what you mean, it’s just that some of us don’t agree with your argument.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Cassandra: Fair enough! It’s just that Kitten wrote a post explaining the difference between actually nice people and Nice Guys TM.

But sure, we can agree to disagree.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Maybe I should have stated that more as I, personally, see what you’re saying and just don’t agree. I do think that the fedora = asshole thing is stupid, but in terms of the Nice Guy issue I think most of the guys labelled that way fit the label very well. There’s a continuum of Nice Guy behavior, and people who’re at the less ridiculous end of it are still on the continuum, in my opinion.

Viscaria
Viscaria
11 years ago

I don’t like terms like “neckbeard” for the same reasons Dvärghundspossen has described. I largely kept out of this thread for that reason (except to celebrate BABEEZ).

But, no, I don’t think Nice Guy ™ is being abused. It has a particular meaning, and people use it to mean that. I also think it’s extraordinarily common to have Nice Guy heroes in rom-coms. How many romantic movies have you seen where the woman dates Wrong Guy #1, Wrong Guy #2, Wrong Guy #3, and finally her poor, beleaguered male best friend has to tell her that it’s unfair of her to keep “using” him for his friendship while she has the gall to date men that aren’t him? And then, of course, she finally sees the error of her ways and chooses the friend, who deserves her love/genitals because of all the effort he’s put in over the years! How many of these films depict the woman as selfish, and the man as long-suffering?

And if it’s not the long-suffering friend, it’s the guy who gets rejected or broken up with who then spends the entire film ignoring the woman’s clear “no” and trying to break down her boundaries until finally she realized he was the right guy all along. These dudes are also depicted as long-suffering, as well as determined and persistent and noble. Just keep asking, boys! Eventually you can badger her yes into a no.

The difference between the films and the reality is that these guys do “get the girl,” unlike the Nice Guys ™ in real life; but that just shows what the filmmakers believe should happen. Women should reward friendship with sex, and they should say yes if you continue asking in more and more elaborate ways.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

I do think that the fedora = asshole thing is stupid, but in terms of the Nice Guy issue I think most of the guys labelled that way fit the label very well.

This. It’s pretty easy to tell who is genuinely nice as opposed to being nice in the hopes of getting sex.

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