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awesome MRA neckbeard rights parody

Shampoo away the grey with Just for Men’s Rights Activists

aandYvf

MRAs can now shampoo away the grey in their neckbeards in just five minutes with Just For Men’s Rights Activists special neckbeard formula gel! Now with a new, angrier formula!

I found this faux trading card on Reddit’s AgainstMensRights subreddit, which is devoted to skewering the MensRights subreddit. The OP says his girlfriend got it at an art show, but alas I do not know where that show was or from whom she got it.

Click on the pic for a bigger version, in which you can see that this formula comes in Fedora Brown, and was “voted best for neckbeards by a panel of elder misogynists.”

Ironically, the beards depicted on real Just for Men boxes aren’t much more believable than the one on the parody box.

Also ironically, I am sporting a bit of a neckbeard today. No bulging veins in my forehead, though.

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CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I think part of this is the nature of movies. The audience is almost always going to empathize with the main protagonist, so if he’s being a jerk and pining after a woman it’s really easy for the overall take-home message to veer into Nice Guy territory. It’s a lot easier to make it clear that the protagonist doesn’t really deserve that kind of sympathy in a book.

With 500 Days I think part of the problem is that the writer himself wasn’t quite clear on what he intended. He did want to make it clear that Summer was a real person with her own agenda, but at the same time we’re really obviously supposed to feel sorry for the guy, even when he’s being a jerk. Which again is part of what annoyed some viewers, having a movie basically say “yeah so this guy is an unreasonable, immature brat but don’t you feel bad for him because he’s so sad?”. That’s a lot to ask of a female audience who’re watching the character in question treat his girlfriend badly.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

As far as man-patiently-waiting-for-his-female-friend-to-fall-for-him-and-eventually-gets-her-trope goes, I think the Odo-Kira romance in Star Trek Deep Space 9 was pretty okay. I generally don’t like the Star Trek romances since everyone who dates or even get married seem to argue all the time and have tons of conflict, as if that were the normal state of things. (I hate the myth that arguing a lot and having lots of conflicts are normal; that stupid myth played a large part in me staying for a year with a complete idiot when I was nineteen.) But two good things about the Odo-Kira romance are
a) the main reason Kira didn’t return Odo’s feelings for the first few years he went pining for her seems to be that he’s so tight-lipped that she has no idea how he feels, she’s actually convinced he’s completely aromantic. After his feelings for her were revealed through a weird and unexpected chain of events he STILL can’t TALK to her about emotions, so it’s just awkward. When he EVENTUALLY relaxes a bit when it comes to romance they become a couple
and
b) Kira had two boyfriends during the years Odo was unhappily in love with her, and both were portrayed as great guys whom she was really happy with. (Then boyfriend one got ill and died a tragic death, and boyfriend two and her simply broke up after a while in an undramatic fashion.)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I agree with Some Girl by the way – if the movie had ended with Summer walking away from him after their conversation on the bench then the overall meaning would have been much less Nice Guy-friendly.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

I saw “my best friend’s wedding” many years ago, which had a pretty unexpected ending. It starts up as a Nice Girl ™ thing, where Julia Roberts’ character realizes she’s actually in love with her male best friend and most stop him from making the mistake of marrying the terrible Cameron Diaz. I kept watching dead sure it would end with her friend realizing his mistake and marrying her instead, but surprisingly it ends with Julia Roberts realizing she was an idiot the whole time.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

I haven’t seen DS9, but I so wish there was a lot more

boyfriend two and her simply broke up after a while in an undramatic fashion.

in movies/on television. Undramatic fashion is how, if the world were perfect, almost all break-ups would be and it would be great if our entertainment modeled that for us. (Same thing for having less of the constant arguing and drama in relationships.)

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Totally agree Some Gal! Actually, there are more such undramatic break-ups in DS9. Bashir and Leeta dated for a period of time, but then they just broke up, completely friendly. Jake also had some girlfriend early in the show (who’s name I don’t remember now), but their relationship just dwindled out when she moved to another planet to go to university. Which is really the kind of stuff that happens all the time in real life, but not that often on TV.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

I thought “My Best Friend’s Wedding” did a good job of making you feel bad for Cameron Diaz, too. It would have been nice if they had made it a little more clear how fucked up a sudden realization of “I love him, I must have him” is when it happened, but overall that was very nicely done.

Funny how they can get it right (or at least more right) when women are acting like assholes than they can when men are, huh?

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Yeah, I’m really trying to come up with some male version of “my best friend’s wedding” but can’t…

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

Another movie with a woman being an asshole/Nice Gal is “The Object if My Affection.” (Lots of reasons that movie is very different from “My Best Friend’s Wedding” not the least of which is the “love interest” is gay.) Thinking of that, though, which I saw when it came out and barely remember, and I remembered “Chasing Amy.”

That is an anti-Nice Guy(TM) movie that doesn’t reward the main character with a girl at the end. So, that’s something. Hardly a big mainstream movie like “My Best Friend’s Wedding” though.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Oh, I just realized that in Star Trek, there are at least two examples I can think of now of socially awkward guys being unhappily in love with a female friend – and NOT ending up with her.

1. The Doctor in Voyager was really good friends with Seven and secretely in love with her. Nothing ever came of it.

2. Barkely in TNG was secretely in love with Deanna. She found out and it was AWKWARD. She continued to be friends with him but eventually married Riker.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

It is interesting that screenwriters can apparently pull off writing about a Nice Guy when he’s actually a Nice Girl instead, and not feel the need to provide a new babe/potential stalking victim at the end.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

Awkward is an understatement for Barkely, I’d say. I don’t know if I’d call them friends (although iirc Deanna does, but that is like reason #542 that she isn’t a very good counselor), but he does get over it and all of his bitterness (over Deanna and other crew members) is very much portrayed as wrong.

I thought all of Deanna’s romantic stuff was very maturely handled. Riker could be a controlling jackass at times, though.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

@CassandraSays

And the only example I can think of that doesn’t do that is semi-autobiographical. Says something that the truer it is, the fewer rewards you get just for being a decent human being.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

It is interesting that screenwriters can apparently pull off writing about a Nice Guy when he’s actually a Nice Girl instead, and not feel the need to provide a new babe/potential stalking victim at the end.

And I can’t imagine why that would be …

/sarcasm

pecunium
8 years ago

Falconer: Mazel Tov, and Slainté!

May they soon be sleeping like adults!

Falconer
8 years ago

May they soon be sleeping like adults!

help

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Well, “adults who don’t have newborn babies in the house,” maybe! 😉

Falconer
8 years ago

I’ll settle for sleeping right now, actually.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I’m not surprised!

Falconer
8 years ago

But I mustn’t wish away their lives by wishing for older babies.

They will never again be this small. I should cherish it.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Do you and your partner take turns in terms of who gets up to look after the babies? If so then earplugs for the one not on duty on the nights they’re not on duty!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

You try the washing machine trick yet? Supposedly babies will decide it might be sleepy time if you put them in their car seats up atop the washing machine (while it runs)

Car rides have the same effect I hear, but I’d be paranoid about taking newborns in a car for the hell of it — I don’t drive for a reason, I have absolutely no faith in other people’s ability to drive (or my own for that matter). Washing machine seems safe enough though.

If all else fails, and they don’t need changing or food or anything, put in ear plugs. Also, they’ll be sleeping soon enough, this is definitely one that does get better with time.

FTR, I don’t have kids, or much experience with tiny ones, but they really do sleep within a few months. You just have to survive until then! (Good luck!)

Falconer
8 years ago

I dunno about the washer. Seems like too much potential for a bad fall.

I haven’t tried car rides yet. The glider rocker seems like it works for now.

We do trade off. I’m going back to work full time Monday, so we’ll see how our schedules work out.

Falconer
8 years ago

Thanks for all your well wishes!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I don’t drive for a reason, I have absolutely no faith in other people’s ability to drive (or my own for that matter)

Oh good, it’s not just me. Even if I could afford a car – and one would be mighty useful – I really don’t like the idea of learning or trusting myself or all the lousy drivers on our roads.

Jessay (@jessay)
8 years ago

I think I should rewatch 500 days of summer because it’s been too long for me to accurately analyze it. I remember watching it and thinking, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH SUMMER? THAT’S JGL! WHO WOULD LEAVE JGL?!” haha, so the fact that I find the guy incredibly attractive clouded my judgement a bit. I think part of the reason I sympathized with his character was because the movie didn’t really give any particular reason for her to suddenly lose interest. But as I become more versed in feminism I realize that she doesn’t need a reason. Her lack of attraction to him is the only reason she needs.

I did find the expectations vs reality bit to be very relateable though. I feel like we’ve all been there.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

OT but I just found a new perfect example of scary entitlement in the wild! Well, on the Dr Nerdlove blog.

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/2013/01/dr-nerdlove-paying/#IDComment553237537

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Gakk. What a pair of creeps.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Cassandra: Jesus, what is it with these guys? Sex won’t help them (they do seem to see it as a magical cure-all), but a year or so of therapy might.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

That McGee guy just gets worse and worse the more comments you read. He’s a classic onion of misogyny.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

And the VERY FIRST comment is about “involuntary celibacy” and how sex really really is a neeeeeed or so close it makes no difference for guys … fuck, did these morons even read the article?

And the letter writer: “A 23 year long dry spell is difficult to deal with.” He’s 23 years old and has been thinking about not getting sex since he was born? And he sounds like GGG’s little brother, all the stuff about suicide and misogyny and blah blah blah that people are responding to.

That McGee sounds like a douchebag with nothing to offer who’s offended that women aren’t all over him. I love Dr Nerdlove’s response to his “sucks to be a guy” comment:

“Mmmn, no I’d say it sucks to be *you*. You’ve limited yourself to a very narrow range of what you want from women, who you want it from and where you can go to find it, and you’re not terribly happy when you find it. Like I always say “Sometimes the only common denominator is *you*”. It rather applies here.”

katz
8 years ago

I think I should rewatch 500 days of summer because it’s been too long for me to accurately analyze it. I remember watching it and thinking, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH SUMMER? THAT’S JGL! WHO WOULD LEAVE JGL?!” haha, so the fact that I find the guy incredibly attractive clouded my judgement a bit. I think part of the reason I sympathized with his character was because the movie didn’t really give any particular reason for her to suddenly lose interest. But as I become more versed in feminism I realize that she doesn’t need a reason. Her lack of attraction to him is the only reason she needs.

I didn’t dig 500 Days of Summer; it really seemed like a classic Nice Guy tract. He’s so nice; how come she can’t see how nice he is and like him? After that I made Doad promise not to bring home any more whiny-emo-dude movies (he already owns Garden State and The Last Kiss). I promised in return not to bring home any more movies about killer talking dogs.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Totaly OT but for anyone who likes guys with long curls, I just saw this beautiful young man while searching a stock photo site:

http://www.gettyimages.com.au/detail/photo/portrait-of-a-man-high-res-stock-photography/94781279

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

More McGee. It’s like GGG metastasized into multiple whiny creeps, and they’re everywhere.

It’s not about being “owed” something. It’s about power, and men has none when it comes to sex and dating, which is all because of the privilege that women refuse to let go of. The sense of entitlement that women carry with them into every god damn interaction with a guy is just mindblowing.

If a guy is only interested in sex? He’s a total asshole for not wanting to engage in a relationship.
If a guy tricks her because he can’t be open about his intentions? He’s hurt her like every other guy out there.
If a guy is not interested in her personality? He’s an asshole.
If a guy is a bit too pushy or eager? He’s desperate and unattractive.
If a guy doesn’t pay for the dinner? He’s cheap. (though some women are good about this)

Women have no right to be pissed at guys for not getting relationships, because they’re the reason why they’re not getting nay to begin with. If they didn’t measure guys by such unrealistic standards, guys would be having all the sex they needed. Guys would feel less resentful, and would be able to go get the “sleep around” need out of their system much quicker and would be able to engage in a serious and caring relationship at a faster rate than they do now.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

By the way, same guy said earlier in the conversation that if men could get as much sex as they wanted then there would be very few relationships. Consistency, what’s that?

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I read that, and later he has NO idea what’s going on when he’s shown the sort of crap women get. Because he thinks we don’t, and of course he knows better ’cause he’s a dude. Or in his case, dud.

Deoridhe
8 years ago

Congrats, Falconer & Co! Wow, a two for one deal! 😯

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

If a guy is only interested in sex? He’s a total asshole for not wanting to engage in a relationship.

The Asshole(tm) !

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Btw, as I began writing about Star Trek relationships I realized where all the hatred for the Seven/Chakotay relationship comes from. That sort of puzzled me and husband, who thought that they were an okay pairing, but loads of fans were like “That totally came out of NOWHERE!” Um, well, for most of the show they weren’t in love and then they became a couple… but that’s not unique for them, and it’s weird to propose some rule according to which characters can’t end up together if there hasn’t been build-up to that point throughout the entire series.

BUT I guess the real problem is this:

Seven and the Doctor were really good friends. The Doctor helped the socially incompetent Seven learning how to behave around people, including how to go on a date. In the process of dating lessons the Doctor realized he was in love with Seven, while Seven realized she thought dating was stupid, and announced to the Doctor that “it’s much better to just be friends, like you and me” or something to that effect (we did feel sorry for the Doctor at that point).
Later in the show, when Seven changes her mind about that whole dating thing, she hooks up with a completely DIFFERENT guy. They become happy together, and the Doctor remains single. End of story!

And I guess, in many people’s eyes,,, that’s just not how it’s SUPPOSED to go!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Dvärghundspossen! Just the person I needed!

Philosophy help please? I just got this from a consequencalist:

“Also, absolute numbers are still very often more important than risk. For example: if Group A comprises 1,000 people, and there is a 10% annual murder rate for that group, after a year 100 people will have died. If Group B comprises 100,000 people, and there is a 1% annual murder rate for that group, after a year 1,000 people will have died. That makes the problem of murder 10 times worse for Group B than for Group A.”

Right along with how I can’t be emotionally involved, gotta be objective. But I don’t want to explain why on that point, lest it basis you. I have far more respect for your philosophy knowledge than his, so help me out here please?

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Um, sorry for that derail. I was just reading that email, thinking “I hope Dvärghundspossen is around” and here you are!

Kim
Kim
8 years ago

I don’t know much about philosophy, but I know that argument is pretty crap. All it says is this person doesn’t understand probability.

The absolute number to be concerned with is the 1% chance that any individual will be murdered. And while the amount of murder in the bigger group might be 10 times as many people, they’ve also got 100 times as many resources to throw at the problem (assuming for the thought experiment that the groups are the same other than size).

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

For another minor derail: just watched Midsomer Murders. At the end, Jones asks Barnaby if he’s coming to a party. Barnaby says, “No, Sarah and I thought we’d have a quiet one, just us and a scented candle.”

OH NOES MISANDRY HAS COME TO MIDSOMER

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Thank you Kim! FTR, the groups in this trout experiment are 1) not equal otherwise, the smaller group is disadvantaged in other ways and 2) it isn’t merely a thought experiment for me, or many of us here, hence the silence on the actual topic.

3) he readily admitted he needs to take a statistics course, hopefully that means he’ll STFU and trust my math

Also, I’m a drunk Argenti, I goes to bed now!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Trout experiment! I wonder if trout can survive colder temps better than loaches! (They can)

I meant thought experiment >.<

Also, autocorrect wants to make &gt;.klt into >kilt XD

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

That CmE dude in the Nerdlove thread is a prize pig too.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Also, absolute numbers are still very often more important than risk. For example: if Group A comprises 1,000 people, and there is a 10% annual murder rate for that group, after a year 100 people will have died. If Group B comprises 100,000 people, and there is a 1% annual murder rate for that group, after a year 1,000 people will have died. That makes the problem of murder 10 times worse for Group B than for Group A.

When consequentialists say “worse”, they mean something like “brought more moral badness into the universe”. And well, if everything else is equal, then 1000 murders bring more moral badness to the universe than 100 murders, so in that respect, the murders of group B are worse than the murders of group A.

Because of the above, it’s rational from a consequentialist standpoint to eradicate murder in group B rather than in group A if you were somehow in a position to choose between these two options.

It ‘s still weird though to say that the murders of group B are worse FOR GROUP B than the murders of group A are for group A. It’s clearly the case that an individual member of group A runs a greater risk of being murdered, or having a friend or family member murdered, than a member of group B does. So even if you accept that the murders of group B are worse overall/all-things-considered/for the world than the murders of group A, it’s hard to see how the murders of group B could possibly be worse FOR GROUP B than the murders of group A are for group A.

Falconer
8 years ago

@kittehs: If way more men than women are murdered in Midsomer, I’d say it was already there!!

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

Ta-Nehisi Coates wrote a great piece on what it is actually like to live with a high murderer rate and how it changes you. (I will see if I can find it) So, I would argue that in terms of absolute badness, it is still a judgement call. The high murderer rate in Group A brings badness into the lives of all 1000 people and all the people the 900 living people interact with. That seems to be like it might even be a larger number than the 1000 dead and the effect of their loved ones and acquaintances. At the very least, we aren’t dealing with 10x as bad anymore.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
8 years ago

I don’t think this is the one I was thinking of (I remember a stand-alone post, but can’t find it), but he talks a bit about it here:
http://m.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2013/02/the-social-trends-driving-american-gangs-and-gun-violence/273170/