I find the Oscars tedious, and only watched a few minutes last night — I bailed shortly after Captain Kirk made his appearance — but apparently I should have stuck around, if only to watch the insufferable Seth MacFarlane’s award-winning performance as Unfunny Misogynist Asshole Host.
What, you say, he didn’t actually win an award for that? Well, yes he did: Having read a number of accounts of the whole sorry spectacle, I’m awarding MacFarlane the non-coveted Man Boobz Boob of the Day Award (Oscar Edition). In the wake of MacFarlane’s performance at the Oscars, in which he devoted a whole song to actresses’ breasts, I should note that I am using the word “boob” to mean “nincompoop.” Which, to be honest, is an undeservedly mild epithet for a guy who punctuated his comments with repeated jokes about rape.
A few of the highlights of MacFarlane’s night:
That song-and-dance number about how great it is to see so many boobs in films – including, specifically, in The Accused, and Monster, and Boys Don’t Cry. You know, during the rape scenes in those quie serious films.
MacFarlane’s animatronic teddy bear (from his movie Ted) joking about attending an orgy at Jack Nicholson’s house – you know, the place where Roman Polanski raped a 13-year old girl.
Oh, and then there was MacFarlane joking about how 9-year-old Quvenzhané Wallis would be too old to date George Clooney in about 16 years. (What, is Heartiste writing MacFarlane’s jokes?) And his bizarre domestic violence joke about Chris Brown and Rihanna. And on and on. (See here for many more examples.)
Getting into the spirit of the evening, whoever was doing The Onion’s twitter account decided it would be hilarious to refer to the aforementioned 9-year-old Quvenzhané Wallis as a “cunt.” The Onion later deleted the tweet and offered an apology for it.
Somehow I doubt we’re going to get an apology from MacFarlane.
Here are a couple more takes on the whole unfortunate evening.
Why Seth MacFarlane’s Misogyny Matters (Vulture)
Seth MacFarlane and the Oscars’ Hostile, Ugly, Sexist Night (The New Yorker)
Oscar Watch: Was That Awful or What? (NY Post)
EDITED TO ADD: Oh, joy! The Men’s Rights subreddit weighs in on the issue, in a thread sort-of-responding to that New Yorker piece.
EDITED TO ADD AGAIN: Actually, r/mensrights has two threads on the subject; here’s the other one.
If it’s any consolation, I had to look up both the person and the pronunciation …
Oh, this made me laugh! A post from 2011 where Nobinayamu asks poor Arksy what his problem is. If Arks and Draggin’ aren’t the same, they’re twins. This is what I’ve been asking him lately (no answer, of course) but much better written. 🙂
Arks is Dragon. Dragon is Arks.
Though he’s been rather uninspired of late.
Maybe we should have a contest to see if anyone can out-Arks Arks, you know, with weird logic and strangely poetic but mostly just strange new ways to describe sex and sex organs.
cloudiah, thank you for that photo link. He’s beautiful, isn’t he?
““Butbutbut FREEEDUMB OF SPEEEEECH !”
Grow up, people.
Sad, sad fact is that most sexist douchenozzles don’t realize that they are sexist douchenozzles. Those who do rarely care.”
Hey! Not true. I know I am a sexist asshole and I do care enough to work on changing. The sexist part; I’m going to remain an asshole.
Was Arks banned at some point? I’m just not sure why he would even bother with his transparent-as-fine-stockings sock puppetry.
@Viscaria
Since Dragon Slayer is rather more fun to sarcastically say in my head when responding, I assume he did it for me. 🙂
Hint to Dragon Slayer: your name does not come off as cool.
You know, I have to wonder why the women attending the Oscars didn’t just get up and leave? You want to tell little boy locker room jokes about tits and rape, that’s fine. You want to listen to it? That’s fine. But me and my friends are just going to go somewhere else to have a good time.
The only reason I could see for staying is that its the mandatory workplace meeting you have to attend…
@pillow in hell
And if they left, that would be the only thing anyone would ask you about for years. I assume it wouldn’t help their careers, either, but fwiw the reaction from reporters alone would have been enough to keep me there.
Ugh. That is some pre-coffee typing right there.
So far in life, the cross section of people that like Big Band Crooners, and people that like Retro Sexism (“Because it’s not sexism if it was the sexism they had the past, right? Now make me a cocktail dollface”. Often accompanied by pat on the arse and condescension) …also includes Seth MacFarlane.
Totally OT but well wishes to anyone battling inclement weather today. From what I hear the southeast States is getting hammered, and up here in western Canada we got a major snowstorm last night. I hit the ditch this morning trying to get to work. A kind couple with a big truck pulled me out but I decided not to chance it again and went home. Now I am snowed in with coffee and Manboobz 🙂
@Bad_dog
Glad you are okay!
pillow in hell: Some were there because they were nominated. Fear of being the only one (and so labelled as, “too sensitive/can’t take a joke) was almost certainly a factor.
But, unless the cameras caught it, no one would see. There are people who are hired/volunteer, to be, “seat fillers” when someone has to get up.
I’ve never liked Family Guy, and often feel like I’m the only person in the world who doesn’t get it. Now I have another reason not to watch!
MGNW- I’ve posted about the whole retro-sexism thing before: for every hundred Mad Men fans who appreciate that the show is a refreshing unvarnished look at the 1960s as “the bad old days” of racism and sexism rather than the popular perception as a time of free love and tolerance, there are a few who don’t get it at all… really, who would actually want to be Don Draper? Only people who aren’t paying full attention to the show and somehow miss all the bits about what an unpleasant and unhappy man he really is.
It’s well known that Seth MacFarlane spreads his pale sticky seed far and wide. My guess is that he had spoken to most of them before the show, and their second mouths were salivating in anticipation.
*boke*
Hey, it might happen. You’ll just have to wait in line behind the African-Americans, Mexicans, Asians, Christians, Jews, Arabs, disabled people, gays and just about every other segment of society he’s hilariously mocked over the years. Lay off the guy for injecting life into this snoreathon of glitter and botox. “Seth MacFarlane is offensive!” is about as timely a newsflash as “feminists are humorless!”
[channels Arks]
The oozing manatees in the audience at the Academy Awards were probably glued to their seats by the spackle oozing from their knees and elbows as their glistening sea urchins urinated love phlegm while watching the incredibly handsome alpha male Seth MacFarlane spurt his charisma juices on stage.
[how’d I do?]
I would like to humbly apologize to anyone who lost the contents of their stomach after reading that. I’m going to take some anti-nausea medication myself.
Ok, I don’t know if I comment enough here to ask for someone to be banned, but I know I am personally sick of everything DS says right about now. He’s just saying purposely assholish things to get a rise out of people. At least I can laugh at Diogenes and other trolls, but this one, not very funny, he’s just sitting there getting off on the idea of being obnoxious.
@cloudiah *retching* *clapping* *retching* *clapping*
cloudiah- bravo! *heave*
Uhg. I can assure the resident Macfarlane stan, it is definitely not women keeping that particular unfunny shitstain on TV. You ever wanna see a bunch of straight white frat boys get defensive? Tell them you don’t think Seth Macfarlane is funny. Well, that’s basically what’s happening in the comment section of every single article talking about how horrible the Oscars were. By Mr Dragon’s own logic, are they doing it because they want to get in his pants?
@cloudiah
I feel like “spackle” makes the whole thing. I will never look at the holes in my wall the same way again.