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Seth MacFarlane was the real boob on Oscar night

seth-macfarlane

I find the Oscars tedious, and only watched a few minutes last night — I bailed shortly after Captain Kirk made his appearance — but apparently I should have stuck around, if only to watch the insufferable Seth MacFarlane’s award-winning performance as Unfunny Misogynist Asshole Host.

What, you say, he didn’t actually win an award for that? Well, yes he did: Having read a number of accounts of the whole sorry spectacle, I’m awarding MacFarlane the non-coveted Man Boobz Boob of the Day Award (Oscar Edition). In the wake of MacFarlane’s performance at the Oscars, in which he devoted a whole song to actresses’ breasts, I should note that I am using the word “boob” to mean “nincompoop.” Which, to be honest, is an undeservedly mild epithet for a guy who punctuated his comments with repeated jokes about rape.

A few of the highlights of MacFarlane’s night:

That song-and-dance number about how great it is to see so many boobs in films  – including, specifically, in The Accused, and Monster, and Boys Don’t Cry. You know, during the rape scenes in those quie serious films.

MacFarlane’s animatronic teddy bear (from his movie Ted) joking about attending an orgy at Jack Nicholson’s house – you know, the place where Roman Polanski raped a 13-year old girl.

Oh, and then there was MacFarlane joking about how 9-year-old Quvenzhané Wallis would be too old to date George Clooney in about 16 years. (What, is Heartiste writing MacFarlane’s jokes?) And his bizarre domestic violence joke about Chris Brown and Rihanna. And on and on. (See here for many more examples.)

Getting into the spirit of the evening, whoever was doing The Onion’s twitter account decided it would be hilarious to refer to the aforementioned 9-year-old Quvenzhané Wallis as a “cunt.” The Onion later deleted the tweet and offered an apology for it.

Somehow I doubt we’re going to get an apology from MacFarlane.

Here are a couple more takes on the whole unfortunate evening.

Why Seth MacFarlane’s Misogyny Matters (Vulture)

Seth MacFarlane and the Oscars’ Hostile, Ugly, Sexist Night (The New Yorker)

Oscar Watch: Was That Awful or What? (NY Post)

EDITED TO ADD: Oh, joy! The Men’s Rights subreddit weighs in on the issue, in a thread sort-of-responding to that New Yorker piece.

EDITED TO ADD AGAIN: Actually, r/mensrights has two threads on the subject; here’s the other one.

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inurashii
inurashii
11 years ago

ugh.

Ashley
11 years ago

I’m glad I missed it.

reginaldgriswold
reginaldgriswold
11 years ago

Ugh indeed. Seth MacFarland was such a weird and terrible choice. Especially contrasted to Amy Poehler and Tina Fey at the Golden Globes.

Dragon Slayer
Dragon Slayer
11 years ago

I’m not a big fan of Family Guy, but MacFarlane is one handsome fellow. This will all die down once the tingles start.

Joanna
11 years ago

I’d expect to see that kind of shit at the MTV awards but not the Oscars. And the boob song? Is Seth MacFarlane like 12?

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Can’t say that I ever really wanted to know what ArksyDragon’s type was.

cloudiah
11 years ago

What, can’t you uptight feminazis take a joke? Go pet your cats and die alone with unshaved legs! LOL.

[Sorry, I momentarily channeled the typical MRA reaction to this. I’m better now.]

Dragon Slayer
Dragon Slayer
11 years ago

I have a type, but MacFarlane isn’t really it. He’s one of those men with an appeal that is practically universal. My jeans are up to my knees right now.

Joanna
11 years ago

@Dragon Slayer: I think I’d be attracted to him if he didn’t talk =P

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Joanna

And if he looked a little less smug. (And more singing, which is really the only reason he isn’t fully in the guys-whose-misogyny-makes-them-frightening-not-sexy category. I love showtunes.)

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Drags, no one cares. Isn’t his banning nigh? He is Arks, right?

I’ve never though MacFarlane was funny. He tries way too hard.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Arks, if you think he’s such a catch, go for it. Even if he weren’t a shitstain, he does nothing for me.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

Feeling a combination of boredom and vague nausea when ArksyDragon shows up is one of life’s few universals.

titianblue
titianblue
11 years ago

I know this’ll come as a bit of a shock, DS, but what you find appealing =/= practically universally appealing. Not close by a long million miles.

patterrssonn
patterrssonn
11 years ago

Not to mention all the racist crap from the unfunny asshole too.

Dragon Slayer
Dragon Slayer
11 years ago

Actually, MacFarlane’s voice is half of his charm. It’s positively Sinatra-like.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

In fact, having looked again, he’s got one of those totally unmemorable faces I’d never even notice on the street.

Freemage
Freemage
11 years ago

Seth MacFarlane is a horse’s ass, and has been for pretty much all of his professional life.

That said, the Onion’s apology for their Twitter-fail? That’s how it’s done. The text of that apology should be given to every college PR class in the country, with the explanation that, “If your client screwed up, and isn’t willing to go this far to make things right, then dump them, because eventually they will do something unsalvageable.”

Here’s the text:

Dear Readers,

On behalf of The Onion, I offer my personal apology to Quvenzhané Wallis and the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for the tweet that was circulated last night during the Oscars. It was crude and offensive—not to mention inconsistent with The Onion’s commitment to parody and satire, however biting.

No person should be subjected to such a senseless, humorless comment masquerading as satire.

The tweet was taken down within an hour of publication. We have instituted new and tighter Twitter procedures to ensure that this kind of mistake does not occur again.

In addition, we are taking immediate steps to discipline those individuals responsible.

Miss Wallis, you are young and talented and deserve better. All of us at The Onion are deeply sorry.

Sincerely,

Steve Hannah
CEO
The Onion

(Hope the block-quote worked.)

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@CassandraSays

Don’t forget the eyerolling. Dragon Slayer provokes eyerolling second only to Diogenes. (If they started interacting with each other, I swear my eyes would pop out and roll across the floor.)

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

If you like Sinatra’s voice. I always thought his singing (both the voice and the famous phrasing) woeful – flat and unmusical.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

They’d both probably be more pleasant to be around if they made their first friend, too.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@The Kittehs’

I like Sinatra, but only because he makes me think if my grandfather. So, it isn’t sexy at all.

Dragon Slayer
Dragon Slayer
11 years ago

I’ll admit that MacFarlane wasn’t a particularly good host. However, the ensuing clamhurt makes it entirely worth it. And the Woman Bloc won’t be able to stay mad at this man for long, because he’s way too handsome. No harm done.

titianblue
titianblue
11 years ago

DS, we’re not mad. We’re contemptuous.

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