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Crystal Bawling: Spearheaders look forward to an apocalyptic future in which the ladies finally get their comeuppance

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Over at The Spearhead, the boys are thinking about tomorrow – to be more specific, about the year 2020, the date at which an MRA calling himself The Fifth Horseman predicted in an eccentric online manifesto that a convergence of forces would lead to the popping of what he calls “the misandry bubble,” and that the ensuing gender apocalypse would put the uppity ladies of the world firmly in their place.

In a post, Spearhead head boy W.F. Price notes that “cliodynamicist” Peter Turchin is also predicting big changes around 2020 (though unlike The Fifth Horseman, Turchin doesn’t base any part of his theory on the development of super-hot Virtual Reality sexbots). This naturally inspires the assembled Spearheaders to start scratching their own crystal balls, enthralled with visions of a future Armageddon that forces the ladies to come crying to them for forgiveness.

Jay R, a sort of apocalyptic deficit hawk, blames the ladies for the US government’s big debts:

Government has acted as though economic principles don’t apply to it — borrowing can increase forever without significant consequence. Riiiiiiiiight. And let’s not forget that the bulk of government debt and spending is a transfer of resources from men to women. It is primarily women who owe this debt. Will they be able to repay it? Only with massive devaluation of the currency.

And then he imagines women owing men a whole other sort of debt, which he has simply made up, and predicts that this debt will come crashing down on women’s heads – a notion that seems to give him a bit of a rage-boner:

Similarly, women’s social debt to men — the incalculable damages resulting from women’s wholesale breach of the social contract — is unsustainable, and when the crash comes, women’s tears will be bitter indeed. This is justice — but still regretable, if one thinks how things might have turned out if radical feminist hatred had not comandeered the process of compromise between the sexes.

True equality for women is on the horizon. When they finally are accorded the same treatment as men, and realize how far they have fallen — how much they themselves have been devalued as a sex — they will think themselves in hell.

Rod Van Mechelen of Backlash.com has an even more elaborate apocalyptic fantasy – although he’s a bit less certain about its outcome being a good one for men. In this portion of a long comment, he speculates about a couple of possible (by which I mean completely and ludicrously impossible) outcomes:

Demographically, the relative value of fecund females is set to go hyperbolic by 2020, when insane policies in Asia and the Subcontinent will manifest a shortage of women of child bearing age. In the past, when war has created a shortage of men, peace and prosperity were the result. What will happen when we have a shortage of women? Will we see a rise in female power, with matriarchies like the ones in Robert Heinlein’s classic, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress? Will we see rampant homosexuality and mandatory sexual servitude for women, as in J. Neil Schulmann’s The Rainbow Cadenza?

Uh, I think I’m going to go with “none of the above.”

Prolific MRA commenter and regular A Voice for Men contributor Keyster predicts (surprise, surprise!) economic collapse and riots in the streets.

[W]hen the money runs out and California becomes Greece, the federal government will step in with “emergency funds” and National Guard troops…a federal government that continues to borrow abroad to sustain itself. Do you see the snake eating it’s tail yet? And we have to wonder why there’s a nationwide shortage of guns and ammo?

Naturally, the rioters will be black.

If you thought inner city blacks were angry over Rodney King, just wait until they become desperate for food. Asian shop owners will be over-run in days, further distribution to these war zones will cease – and they’ll branch out to the tony suburbs seeking sustinence and easy prey. Drones will be called in to contain the rovering marauding gangs.

Keyster predicts that all these scary riots will lead the (presumably non-black, non-rioting) ladies to start batting their eyelashes at big strong (presumably non-black, non-rioting) men.

Men will notice a decided shift in women’s once hostile attitude towards them. “Can I get you a sandwhich honey?” “Are you thirsty?” “Need a back rub?”

They will be actively engaged in seeking out male protectors and openly using sexual allure to attract them as mates. Men are so much better at defending themselves from bad guys, so you’ll want one with you if you’re a woman.

Greyghost, meanwhile, imagines that the anti-uppity-female effects of an economic collapse will be enhanced by … the development of a male birth control pill. (You may need to read this one slowly; Mr. Ghost is not what you’d call a great communicator.)

[L]et’s say a male birth control pills comes out before cold fusion or some other extender of government wealth. What happens when even a coward to stand up to the femine imperative knows this misandry is unsustainable and figures out a male pill will maybe cause a correction while he still can be a coward. A woman without child is a worker drone and not eligible for entitlements.The US may look like China with low wage factories full of female workers with male mechanics/technicians keeping the machines running.

What is really funny and would be interesting to check out. Knowing women from reading and discussing female nature with you all here in the manosphere in general with the male pill being a pleasant wife might be the herd status symbol of the future. Take civil unrest combined with poor economic opportunities with men having the finale say so on who gets pregnant or not and we have a new status symbol.

Like Keyster, who once boasted on The Spearhead of dating a 14-year-old when he was 25, Greyghost seems enamored of relatively weak and dependent gals:

Next to a dog female fear is a mans best friend. Fearful insecure women tend to be more polite and pleasant to those around her.

Dream on, guys. Dream on.

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cloudiah
11 years ago

So what are the best tools/things to carry for self defense? I commute on foot, sometimes when it’s dark. My sister got me pepper spray, but I am convinced an ill-timed gust of wind would blow it back at me if I ever used it. I usually just rely on using my keys as a potential weapon.

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

It occurs to me that, in the event of Thugboy Apocalypse, wouldn’t the natural hypergamy of females drive them towards the Alpha Thugboys instead of the MRAs? After all, the MRAs are already complaining about the Alpha Thugboys getting all the Ebbul Wimmins due to hypergamy.

MRA logic. I has trouble following it.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

If it was the Zombie Apocalypse, I’d probably take a zombie over an MRA.

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

Kitteh, in case of Zombie Apocalypse I’d rather hang in the Aussie Boobz Bunker, which will be equipped with deadly lego-based boobytraps!

Peter
11 years ago

Hey, I can think of some statues I wouldn’t mind seeing pantsless.:)

Don’t blink.

patterrssonn
patterrssonn
11 years ago

This is my favorite.

True equality for women is on the horizon. When they finally are accorded the same treatment as men…they will think themselves in hell.

That they actually think their lives are hell compared to that of women, Hell for fuck sakes. I’m amazed they all don’t just go in for gender reassignment surgery and live out their lives in a state of feminine bliss.

katz
11 years ago

patter: That would require them not to be transphobic.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

@Freitag – LOL! Don’t worry, we’ll send the blueprints for the lego booby traps (never was the word booby more aptly used) to all the Boobz Bunkers around the world. Wouldn’t want it to turn into a repetition of On the Beach, after all.

@Peter – LOL also! Though this is the one I had in mind. Much prettier. 🙂

BritterSweet
BritterSweet
11 years ago

Haha at them fantasizing about women turning to men – or specifically, *them* – for protection from the ensuing danger. If anything, the MRAs themselves would be the danger. Even if the world was ending, who would feel the least bit safe around someone who wants to firebomb courts and police stations among other things?

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
11 years ago

@The Kittehs’

Pantsless on a horse seems like it would be uncomfortable to me. 🙂

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Some Gal – he’d need to dismount first anyway, so hopefully that wouldn’t be an issue. 😀

Shiraz
Shiraz
11 years ago

On the Walking Dead, rapists are considered lower than the zombies. But these MRA whiners would never survive a zombie apocalypse — they can’t even make their own sandwiches. Can you imagine?
(An MRA sheepishly goes walks out onto the porch. He’s clutching a crowbar and gapes at an approaching zombie) “I have to kill it? Why do I have to do all the woooooork? What are you doing back there, Vera? Eating bon-bons ?! Help me, damn it! I’m carrying precious sperm…you like sperm, don’t you?! Don’t you want to have babies during a zombie apocalypse, Vera?”
(Vera reaches outside the screendoor and pushes the MRA down the porch steps. She slams the door tight. MRA guy can feel his heart stop when he hears the lock click).

And this shit:
“This is justice — but still regretable, if one thinks how things might have turned out if radical feminist hatred had not comandeered the process of compromise between the sexes.”
Women owing dudes sex for shelter and protection, is that the process of compromise he’s speaking of? Oh wow, ewwww.

“True equality for women is on the horizon. When they finally are accorded the same treatment as men, and realize how far they have fallen — how much they themselves have been devalued as a sex — they will think themselves in hell.”

Yeah, he had brain fever when he wrote that. We’ll be sorry that we refused to be defined by our lady parts, by god. Also, if a genie appeared in front of him and asked if he’s like to be turned into a woman — because, you know, we have it so much better — he’d laugh his ass off.

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

Kitteh, here you go!

Yoyo
Yoyo
11 years ago

Freitag, I’ll join you in the Aussie boob bunker, don’t for get we’ll still get good Internet through our vagina broadband.

I look forward to reclining on our hard chairs, with our scented candles, til the roving bands of mras are eaten by the puas or vice versa. Who cares? We’ll be watching Life or Game of Thrones and eating vegan bonbons .
😉

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

Re: Zombies and lego booby traps. Forget the crowbars. Zombies shuffle around rather slowly anyway. Strew legos in their path, and just walk away! They won’t be making any speed after that.

Uh, of course, making sure that you’re casting the legos behind you as you make your escape.

MRAs in any sort of apocalypse? If their XBox skillz aren’t involved, forget about them. They’ll be the first to go.

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

@Yoyo

But…but…I can’t sit on the hard chairs! I have smaller weight-bearing buttock pads! But I could go out and hunt the mammoth for everybody! Or squirrels or something. Or I make a good homemade salsa. Would that work? Could I trade salsa or queso or something for a cushion?

Creative Writing Student

My weapons of choice are a good crowbar (multifunctional!) and some loyal and well-armed friends.

The crowbar, in addition to its uses as a strike weapon and a way of getting into useful things and places, also has a damage bonus against the fair folk in case that short story I wrote once comes true.

I really hope it doesn’t because I was 14 and had some… odd… ideas about appropriate use of adjectives.

drst
drst
11 years ago

MRA logic. I has trouble following it.

@frietag235 – it’s tough to follow something that doesn’t exist.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Freitag – I’ll watch the Python tonight (no sound on my work PC).

How about this: we’ll have cat-hair filled cushions for the manginas! There will, after all, be lots of kitties in the bunkers with us. (Or dog hair, if you prefer: we’re not biased.)

drst
drst
11 years ago

Dammit.

freitag235
freitag235
11 years ago

Cat-hair cushions will work. My cats can provide enough extra fur for everyone!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

And with all the kitties that’ll be in the bunkers, we’ll have enough for pillows, doonas, futons, you name it.

::memo to self: include large supply of paraffin oil for treating hairball-afflicted kitties.::

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
11 years ago

@Tulgey Logger *dies*

@Kittehs’ Help is that statue who I think it is? Haven’t you already seen him naked? :-p

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
11 years ago

I am inclined to agree with Keyster that men like himself will notice a shift in women’s attitude toward them. I just don’t think it will be in the direction Keyster predicts.

emilygoddess
emilygoddess
11 years ago

Argh, my emoticon got cut off. Why, WordPress? Why?