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Fidelbogen’s Sonnets for the Portuguese

Brazilians celebrate the arrival of Fidelbogen em Português
Brazilians celebrate the arrival of Fidelbogen em Português

Brazilians! Portuguese! I have fantastic news! Fidelbogen is now available in Portuguese!

Yes, our old frenemy Fidelbogen, the self-described Counter-Feminist Agent of Change (CFAC), and the would-be philosopher king of the manosphere, has managed to find someone who is, for some perverse reason, willing to translate snippets from Mr. F’s blogs into Portuguese.

This is a bit ironic, in that Fidelbogen’s writing, in its original English, reads a lot like a bad translation from the German. He’s a writer of almost pathological verbosity; rarely has any writer said so little with so many words. Not that, at the root, he has much to say; underneath all the verbiage, his ideas are trite and simplistic. And yet he seems convinced that he’s a genius. He’s one of those terrible writers who thinks he’s great. The manosphere is full of them.

And so I thought I’d use the opportunity to present some examples of Fidelbogen’s magisterial prose.

These examples are all from Mr. F’s new blog, CounterSnippets, which he evidently sees as a sort of “Dummies” version of his regular blog, The Counter-Feminist, a place where he can put forth pithy counter-feminist slogans for the masses. As he describes it:

This blog is a meme-dispersion apparatus. It is called “counter-snippets” because it features snippets of counter-feminist philosophy — sometimes one or two sentences, but typically a short paragraph. Each snippet is designed to be memorable and to stick in the reader’s mind. Having done so, it may take root and grow like a seed

As you’ll see from the examples below, Mr. F has not quite mastered the fine art of pithiness just yet.

Each of these quotes is from a separate post.

The complete phenomenology of female supremacism outdistances what any given feminist would openly acknowledge to be feminism, and the word feminism itself operates as a misdirection of attention. (Source)

In the end, the non-feminist revolution is not an identifiable human target group but a cloud of forces manifesting through human actions which can sometimes be politically linked to each other, but other times not. (Source)

In the end, the feminist left gets the bulk of its blood supply from the feminist right.  And that blood supply is nothing less than old-school gynocentrism itself. (Source)

Feminism has driven you fifty miles out into the country and left you there to fend for yourselves. Yes, it is unwise to take rides from strangers. Now you’ve got some walking to do, but hopefully the exercise will prove beneficial. I am the messenger. (Source)

We would understand feminism as a gynonormative project, while acknowledging that it could not have come into operation without a preexisting base of gynocentricity in the traditional culture.

Gynonormativization is integral to the establishment of female supremacy. (Source)

Counter-feminist analysis concludes that feminism and female supremacism are interchangeable terms, and we assert that no other analysis will generate effective political traction.

You may agree, or not, that feminism equals female supremacism — yet female supremacism as a datum is not to be doubted. (Source)

We of the non-feminist sector claim the status of an autonomous power with respect to the feminist power on earth, and we demand the full measure of diplomatic courtesy due to such a status. (Source)

Feminism as a whole needs both the academic and the pop cohorts. The academic cohort is needful so that feminism will have an intellectual vanguard — so that the snake will have a head, in other words. The pop cohort is needful so that the vanguard ideology will be demographically incarnated in numbers — so that the snake will have a body, in other words. (Source)

Remember that ALL feminism is packed into a system of interwoven karma. ALL feminism contributes to an evolutionary trajectory which points toward a radical feminist future. (Source)

Your message will take root and grow only if you make the herd disintegrate. Do that, and their power to dismiss your message will disintegrate in tandem. And when people get to this point, they will instinctively cast about in search of a new herd they can join. You know how joiners are. So it is a good idea to prepare something they can cling to, that they will be more readily persuaded to make the jump. (Source)

If we translate all of his posts from Fidelbogenese to plain old English, the message of his blog seems to be pretty simple:

1) We non-feminists should be the ones to define what feminism is.

2) Not all feminists are radical feminists but somehow they really all are, because of … karma?

3) Once we defeat feminism, it should be easy enought to herd the former feminists into our flock if we set forth some nifty little memes for them to “cling to.”

It’s hard to imagine a philosophy that’s much more condescending and cynical than this. No wonder Fidelbogen tries to disguise his philosophy in giant gasous clouds of verbiage.

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CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Describing someone’s blog that’s dedicated to convincing everyone else to hate women as much as he does as his “work” – just a little pretentious.

Dagrabbit
Dagrabbit
11 years ago

What is it with MRAs and feminists as vampires?

Well, that menstrual blood that some of us shed has to come from the neck of SOMEBODY. =D

Dagrabbit
Dagrabbit
11 years ago

Jealous much? You bring yourself down to this level to try insulting other people’s writing and work?

Jealous of weak writing skills? Not particularly, no.

whataboutthemoonz
11 years ago

Every time you point out that someone’s writing is terrible, someone shows up to accuse you of jealousy.

Sometimes, shitty writing is just shitty.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

If I was paid by the word I might be jealous of his ability to bury a very simple point in so much verbiage that the whole thing ends up being 10 times as long as it needs to be? But I’m not, so no, not jealous.

inurashii
inurashii
11 years ago

“Your torte, sir.”

“This … this looks and smells like shit.”

“YOU’RE JUST JEALOUS B/C YOU CAN’T COOK”

pillow in hell
pillow in hell
11 years ago

Ugh. I think I either need a school of Babelfish or a hundred years travel time in a TARDIS to make sense of Fidelbogen.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Sudden thought – are Fidelbogen and Meller related? If not perhaps they could at least be friends. Meller seems like he could use some friends who aren’t made of plastic or porcelain.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Mornin’ all. 🙂

AC/DC – nope, no strong feelings about them at all. Just never interested in their stuff. My teens were devoted to ELO, Mike Oldfield, Rick Wakeman, Abba, if we’re talking about bands whose records I bothered buying. Only Australian band I liked, and only to the extent of having one of their singles, was Skyhooks.

I was young enough to be pleased when a woman became Prime Minister of Britain, and wasn’t taking much notice of politics during the 80s. But everything I learned about Thatcher since, and Reagan, disgusts me. It’s more visceral with Thatcher, probably because I’m more emotionally invested in Britain, having loved its history since I was a little tacker. Howard I loathe, still. The day he got done in 2007 AND lost his seat – only the second standing Oz PM to do – was a great day, however disappointing Labor has been.

Anyone jealous of Fidelbogen’s writing … gods, I’d hate to see how bad theirs would be.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Meller seems like he could use some friends who aren’t made of plastic or porcelain.

Could he handle dealing with someone (even a male someone) who wasn’t totally passive?

Kiwi girl
Kiwi girl
11 years ago

@titianblue,

What is it with MRAs and feminists as vampires?

there is the discourse of republicans as zombies and democrats as vampires. That last link is dated 2008 and I can’t be bothered going back more than 3 pages into Google search to see if this motif goes back any earlier.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Injecting a little class consciousness into this, shouldn’t it be Republicans who’re the vampires? As in, parasitic aristocrats sucking the life out of the peasantry and using charm and glamor to make the peasantry go along with it? Also, old-school vampires tended to prefer female victims.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Dagrabbit

Well, that menstrual blood that some of us shed has to come from the neck of SOMEBODY.

This seems like it would fit right in with what passes for anatomy in MRA, Republican, etc. circles. I like it! It makes me wonder if we have a direct line from mouth and/or stomach to the uterus, if we have some sort of blood pouch, or if we absorb the blood and things continue in a more conventional fashion. (I’ve probably spent too much time considering how regular vampires would work…) I like the blood pouch idea, personally. I bet we could convince quite a few MRAs of its existence. Their gullibility when it comes to weird tales of creepy female anatomy seems limitless.

Dagrabbit
Dagrabbit
11 years ago

Some Gal: I think an MRAnatomy book needs to be written! The forward can be by Dr. Zoidberg and the illustrations can be in the style of this (NSFW) Oglaf webcomic… http://www.oglaf.com/sexmanual/

Maybe someday we can get them past “the head bone’s connected to the neck bone” and the four humours! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humorism

Some Gal Not Bored at All

I was thinking of imbalanced humors when I thought about the possibility of feminist vampires absorbing the extra blood! (Bring me leeches, posthaste!) However, I think if we start heading in that direction, what we really need to address is the build-up of MRA bile!

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Hi guys… I wonder if I could extract a bit of sympathy?

I know many people here struggle with mental illness. Well, I just got bad side-effects from Haldol. I’ve been taking Haldol on-off since I was twenty, and never had any bad side-effects. I started taking it again a week ago because I became borderline psychotic – and now suddenly my brain decided that it doesn’t like Haldol any longer, so it’s gonna make my tongue and left hand stiff in response.

Hopefully these side-effect goes away again if I’ll just stop taking it now. But then I’ll have to embark again on the onerous journey of the guinea pig, trying to find something that a) works against the hypo-manic and borderline psychotic (which may become straight-out psychotic if left untreated) symptoms I occasionally suffer, and b) doesn’t have bad side-effects.

*sigh* 🙁

howardbann1ster
11 years ago

Dvärghundspossen–that sounds like it sucks. 🙁

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Thanks Howard. Yeah it does.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@ Dvärghundspossen

I am so sorry and I wish you all the best. I hate trying out drugs to see which fit. To me, there is the uncertainty and worry (sometimes outright fear) that with each drug you try there might be no benefit at all and just a bunch of unpleasant side effects. The more drugs you go through, the more you get to feel like the whole exercise is just fruitless. (I just went through that with trying to find a mood stabilizer and the best we got was Abilify, which, as I’ve mentioned before, gives me terrible anxiety. I can’t try Cymbalta without it, though. Anyway, not to make this all about me, just I understand.) The process might suck (after all, just having to do it sucks), but I hope it sucks as little as possible and that you find the right drug for you ASAP. My thoughts are with you.

Also, my sympathy for the change in how your body handles the Haldol. It has got to be awful and unsettling to have something you’ve depended on change into something you can’t.

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Thankyou so much Some Gal. I hope the best to you too, and that you eventually find a mood stabiliser that doesn’t give you anxiety.

There’s a saying in Swedish which goes “boten är värre än soten”. It means, in slightly archaic language, “the cure is worse than the illness”. No fun when it feels like that.

Creative Writing Student
Creative Writing Student
11 years ago

@dvaghundsposen (sorry for misspelling if I did)

*hugs if wanted*

Dvärghundspossen
Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Thanks!

Nice Ogress
Nice Ogress
11 years ago

I am late to this party, but I’d like to report that reading Fidelbogen’s purple prose while mentally translating it into the voice of Mojo Jojo almost makes it bearable and certainly makes it funny.

I think I’ve probably bollixed that link. >_> Hopefully not!

Nice Ogress
Nice Ogress
11 years ago

Hooray!

Kristen
Kristen
11 years ago

Aw crap…just read the blog in portuguese, it does not seem to come from a translating website, but really someone who speaks portuguese. Am now very disappointed in my fellow Brazilians (or Portuguese since I’m not too sure who translated it).

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