Categories
are these guys 12 years old? douchebaggery hate hundreds of upvotes men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA reddit taking pleasure in women's pain trigger warning

The Men’s Rights Subreddit: A net exporter of hate

A new shipment of angry MRAs is on its way!
A new shipment of angry MRAs is on its way!

Oh, Reddit, not again. So about a week ago, a woman posted what seemed to be a heartfelt and sorrowful confession to r/confession with the self-explanatory title “I cheated on my sweetheart of a husband for 3 years with my violent, abusive ex. This is the one secret I am taking to my grave.”

Now,  r/confession purports to be a subreddit devoted to helping out those who confess their wrongdoings, and the sidebar warns potential commenters not to be abusive: “No personal attacks, we are not here to make people feel bad.”

But Reddit being Reddit – that is, a hotbed of resentful “nice guys” always looking for an excuse to vilify women in general or a woman in particular – many of the commenters attacked the OP as an evil “scumbag,” or worse. While the worst comments were deleted by the mods, many attacks on the OP remain, some with literally hundreds of upvotes. Those who expressed any degree of empathy for the OP found their comments roundly downvoted.

After a few days, the discussion died down.

But then, after several days of silence, a new wave of abusive comments started to appear.  Like this one:

COmomwhore

And this:

COcuntywhore

Oh, but there’s more:

COnastyover

I’ve saved the worst for last. (I’ve also included the response from the confessor herself.) TRIGGER WARNING for violence.

.

.

.

CONkingdick

So how did a dead thread like this come to life again, and so unpleasantly? Well, you guessed it: it got linked to in r/mensrights and later in r/redpill, a smaller and even more extreme “men’s rights” subreddit.  And indeed, if you look at the comment histories of the people I’ve just quoted, you’ll see that most of them also posted in either r/mensrights or r/redpill around the time they made these comments.

It’s a fair guess that many of the upvotes that these terrible comments got also came from visiting r/menrights-ers.

Back in r/mensrights, one commenter, disgusted by all this, chronicled some of the bad behavior of his MRA comrades:

COibm

A lot more people besides IBM2431 are going to have to stand up and speak out if they want to clean up r/mensrights’ well-deserved reputation as a net exporter of hate.

Not that r/confession is absolved of blame here. While commenters there piled on this woman, who seemed sincerely sorry for what she said she had done, the r/confession regulars found nothing wrong with the behavior of another commenter — a dude, of course — who confessed he’d “fapped” a number of times to cam footage he found of a friend of his sister’s masturbating — which was evidently recorded and put online without her knowledge or consent.

NOTE: By the time this post goes up, it’s possible and even likely that the mods of r/confession will have deleted the worst of the comments from the r/mensrights and r/redpill invaders. But they should still be visible in the comment histories of those who posted them.

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

454 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
inurashii
inurashii
7 years ago

i probably shouldn’t be reading about garbage people while feeling like garbage.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

And they say they aren’t a hate group or abuser’s lobby. Uh-huh.

I wonder what they would say to a man who confessed to cheating with an abusive ex.

Kiwi girl
Kiwi girl
7 years ago

@inurashii, internet hugs if you want them. 🙂 And no, not a good place to go if you’re in a sad place.

Maybe this is their actual activism: they want the right to spew their hate wherever and whenever, without condemnation, and they’re posting their shite all over the place to try to change the norms around this behaviour.

Nope, just keeps showing the rest of us what awful human beings you are.

Starla
Starla
7 years ago

I’m starting to think someone needs to sit down and explain to these men what men’s rights issues really are, and maybe also a register-him page.

An lnconvenient Truth
An lnconvenient Truth
7 years ago

“I cheated on my sweetheart of a husband for 3 years with my violent, abusive ex. […] I was stupid, immature, and in love.”

Alpha fucks, Beta bucks.

Kiwi girl
Kiwi girl
7 years ago

Oh, and should have posted this above: internet safety tip – don’t post confessions online. It is unlikely to make you feel better and you open yourself up for the shitstorm like David has copied here. No matter what you did, having a shitstorm come at you is Not Something You Deserve. It also doesn’t cancel out your deed. If you need to talk to someone, go see a trained counsellor.

/internet safety tip spiel mode disengaged

aworldanonymous
7 years ago

It’s kind of funny, I kind of got informally banished from reddit by some creeps who went through my comments history to dig up a bunch of embarrassing dirt on me, which because they now all have me RES tagged with it, means it may very well follow me everywhere on that site now. Oh well, I needed a vacation from it anyway.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
7 years ago

Men’s Rights Activism: making sure every woman who’s done something wrong hears that she is a c**t who should die, oh and by the way if a man does the exact same thing it’s also the woman’s fault.

Beneath The Tin Foil Hat

My partner and I used to put our blog posts on Reddit. After a bunch of these idiots attacked her over a feminist poem she published, we both ran screaming.

cloudiah
7 years ago

inurashii, hope you feel better.

I made the mistake of looking at r/redpill. o_o

katz
7 years ago

Anon, being unable to visit Reddit is a blessing in disguise.

cloudiah
7 years ago

This r/redpill thread may be the saddest thing I have ever read. It’s just … I don’t know why it’s never occurred to these guys that women are human beings.

katz
7 years ago

HB9? Was he dating a pencil?

cloudiah
7 years ago

I’m using a Mirado Black Warrior HB2. HYPERGAMY.

Seriously, it’s a nice pencil.

jennydevildoll
7 years ago

I’m not saying the MRA’s responses were appropriate, and it’s stupid to take THIS ONE woman’s behavior as indicative of ALL women, as some of them so love to do, but if I’m totally honest the person I feel most sorry for in this debacle is her “sweetheart of a husband”.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
7 years ago

Sigh. I’m stuck in the Bic Zone.

This r/redpill thread may be the saddest thing I have ever read. It’s just … I don’t know why it’s never occurred to these guys that women are human beings.

It’s like an entire culture failed to tell them that there are ~3.5 billion people who are also human beings, and by the way they aren’t possessions or puzzle boxes.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I wonder what they would say to a man who confessed to cheating with an abusive ex.

They’d probably tell him to man up and beat or kill her instead.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Bloody blockquotes!

whataboutthemoonz
7 years ago

I’m not saying the MRA’s responses were appropriate, and it’s stupid to take THIS ONE woman’s behavior as indicative of ALL women, as some of them so love to do, but if I’m totally honest the person I feel most sorry for in this debacle is her “sweetheart of a husband”.

Really? “You’re a cunt you deserve to die” registers as less important than ” marital problems”?

You do realize that you can condemn her cheating on him while ALSO NOT PLACING A HIERARCHY ON WHICH IS WORSE BECAUSE SERIOUSLY SHE DOES NOT DESERVE THAT KIND OF HATE SPEWED AT HER, right?

blitzgal
7 years ago

oh and by the way if a man does the exact same thing it’s also the woman’s fault.

And this is it in a nutshell.

Shiraz
Shiraz
7 years ago

This feels like the fandom boards at AMC. Male characters can deal drugs, murder and cheat and fans go easy. Women characters doing anything gets rounds and rounds of “cunt must die!!!!” I guess that’s a symptom of misogyny — even if the people in question are fake. Breaking Bad? Mr. White makes meth, kills his rivals and lies….no problem, his wife Skylar cheats on him one time before, and she gets a Facebook page dedicated to her called, “SKYLAR Must Die!” Betty on Mad Men? Pffft. The Andrea hate on Walking Dead is positively mind-boggling.

An lnconvenient Truth
An lnconvenient Truth
7 years ago

This r/redpill thread may be the saddest thing I have ever read. It’s just … I don’t know why it’s never occurred to these guys that women are human beings.

Niceguy shaming: because involuntary celibacy isn’t quite punishment enough.

themisanthropicmuse
7 years ago

As I read this I can’t help but thinking of the female MRA (can’t remember her name) who came to this blog and had wrote a blog post about how her male friend was practically a hero for cheating on his wife so she could feel like the good guy in a divorce. Seriously. Fuck these people with their painfully stupid black and white way of thinking. Men = good and women = bad is so oversimplified as to be useless to any meaningful conversation about any subject.

The Stepford Knife
The Stepford Knife
7 years ago

I’m being reminded of all those sad MRA lists of their requirements in a partner, like the (now deleted) one by Mr Neackbeard Chronicles:

Unwaveringly loyal, even if I cheat.
Will retain a trim figure through exercising and eating right.
Knows how to cook and is willing to do so every day.
Accepts that the entire damn house is my ‘man cave.’
Will enthusiastically perform any sex act immediately upon my request.
Keeps the house in order and sparkling clean.
Shuts the fuck up.
Non-educated and not politically minded.
Recognizes my need for bro time and alone time.
Bisexual and open to the idea of threesomes.
No children, past, present or future.
Virgin, but willing to learn.
Curtsies whenever I walk in the room.
Always dresses sexy.
HB10 as a minimum.
Tiptoes around so as not to wake me when I’m sleeping in.
Doesn’t waste my money on things I don’t want.

You don’t need to read beyond Item #1, and I don’t need to add anything to this.

howardbann1ster
7 years ago

Why, that is a wonderful list which in way awakens in me the rage against injustice.

In other news in backwards land, it’s still wonderfully warm where I am and I am not currently wishing I could find my old ratty super-comfortable sweater.

howardbann1ster
7 years ago

*in NO way

The Stepford Knife
The Stepford Knife
7 years ago

I guess having a threesome with another woman isn’t cheating, because that’s the kind of lesbian sex women don’t actually enjoy because it’s done purely for the benefit of any men watching.

Imagine being “Bisexual and open to the idea of threesomes” and a “Virgin, but willing to learn”. Imagine being attracted to both men and women and up for a threesome, and all of the sexual adventures you could have… and denying yourself those so you can save your virginity for a total arsehole… no wonder Mr Neckbeard claimed he was single and would probably remain so forever. Honestly Mr NB- it’s not us, it’s you.

Pear_tree
Pear_tree
7 years ago

“This r/redpill thread may be the saddest thing I have ever read. It’s just … I don’t know why it’s never occurred to these guys that women are human beings.”

Wait, that thread reads:
“I didn’t talk to women for a long time, then I saw a hot women in a shoe shop and asked her out. She was nice but couldn’t. I think asked out another hot women I didn’t know and she agreed to go out with me, but we turned out incompatible. What am I doing wrong?”

I mean if you get annoyed about being successful with women because it is unfair they rejected you, you probably can’t win

The Stepford Knife
The Stepford Knife
7 years ago

Pear_tree- basically he’s saying “I got rejected by one woman, then another said yes but it didn’t work out”. To me that sounds like a pretty standard experience of dating, and like he’s been doing pretty well, all things considered! Does he really expect every woman to say “yes” and then to be 100% compatible with him?

The Stepford Knife
The Stepford Knife
7 years ago

…mind you, “but we turned out incompatible” coming from an MRA probably means she did something utterly heinous, like forgetting to shave her legs one day.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
7 years ago

That guy’s problem is that he needs to either ask out some women, or just a woman. Dating a women never works out.

I cover all this and more in my book Salisbury Peenfeels’ The Art of Mystery Game One Night Stands Hot Sex Buy Louis V5itton Peni5 Enhancers For Last All Night.

Carleyblue
Carleyblue
7 years ago

Why are there so many of these guys? I mean, I get that there will always be some men like that, and some people who are just horrible, but enough to form whole communities? And why are so many of them young? No, it is not normal for so many young people to be so angry and hateful. I see it at my university too. I hear ‘sex is impossible to get for guys’ all the time, and they have just given up. Whenever I go out with a young guy I hear a woman described as a cunt or a bitch every other sentence. I know it’s not everyone, of course, but it is a large percentage of them, and there’s this incredible anger under the surface for so many of them, an anger I don’t see in the vast majority of the female students, or in older guys. Will they grow out of it maybe? Because I dread to think of these guys growing up, being in leadership positions, and still being the same way. This is not the way things should be.

It just frustrates and baffles me so much sometimes, and today is one of those days. And what’s the solution? (I know there is no good answer to this, I’m mostly just venting)

Pear_tree
Pear_tree
7 years ago

Yes, the Stepford Knife, I agree with you. I have failed to get dates before because the guy showed interest but I’m not socially able so didn’t know what to do next. I don’t blame the guy for this. It is odd but some of the stories there aren’t even sad because they have been reasonably successful.

howardbann1ster
7 years ago

Carley, I’ve heard it opined that this is a backlash; that the Rush Limbaugh’s of this world have been creating a space for spewing misogynistic drivel, and the reason it’s okay when he spews it is because it’s anti-feminist, and to a large number of people that makes it great. And when he spews it then it makes room for the guys to say it.

And that creates a space where this anger is acceptable to all these guys you meet to throw right out there for you to see.

Will they outgrow it? I don’t know. I know that I had to outgrow the misogyny I grew up steeped in, largely through this site and others like it. So I know they’re capable of it.

Neurite
Neurite
7 years ago

TBH, Stepford Knife, I am almost positive that list must be a Poe. Sure, we’ve seen some amazingly deluded shite from MRAs, but “curtsies whenever I walk into the room” – this reads more like someone sane mocking the exaggerated and offensive expectations MRAs have of women. Of course, I could be wrong, but that’s my gut feeling with this one… Then again, it would be such a good satire of MRA’s “standards” because, buried under rationalizations and with less on-the-nose wording, this is not that far from what they seem to demand.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
7 years ago

Oh look, truthy is here to keep us company.

Protip for truthy: if you constantly talk about women like they’re possessions and get enraged that you have been denied one, you’re probably not a nice guy. You may, however, be a Nice Guy™.

And no, “involuntary celibacy” is not punishment enough, because it’s not a punishment.

Neurite
Neurite
7 years ago

aworldanonymous, if you are looking for an online community to fill the time created by the Reddit vacation, and this site doesn’t suffice/the subject matter here gets too depressing sometimes, may I recommend Captain Awkward? (Please ignore me if you already know of them/others have already recommended them.) Their commenter community is a bunch of lovely people who frequently refresh my faith in humanity, even though I am so far only a lurker there (never had anything to add to the discussion so far, but enjoy reading it).

DLColvin
7 years ago

I find it funny. Don’t they realize that the very reason that they don’t get dates is because of this drivel that they constantly spew?

On another note.. This guy I know had a mail order bride. She didnt speak much English, but even she knew something was wrong with him. I mean, he’s 40, and shares his bedroom with his brother. Worth a lol for me:D

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Truthy: that would maybe be true if a.) icel were a thing, and b.) like Tulgey said, an actual punishment.

cloudiah
7 years ago

Ha ha, Truthy quotes me but then follows up with a non sequitur. At least, I wasn’t aware that saying that men should view women as human beings was “shaming.”

I am glad I don’t live in Truthy’s world.

cloudiah
7 years ago

Actually, my favorite comment in that redpill thread was (I am paraphrasing, because I am not going back there): “I know this really hot woman who is dating an engineer. Dude doesn’t even lift weights!”

titianblue
titianblue
7 years ago

That redpill thread – am I missing something? He never had a girlfriend until he asked a woman out. Duh! Wonder why that was!

cloudiah
7 years ago

He never had a girlfriend until he asked a woman out. Duh! Wonder why that was!

Wait, wait! I know this one! Misandry?

titianblue
titianblue
7 years ago

Of course it’s really the fault of the government for not supplying him with a girlfriend ….

freitag235
freitag235
7 years ago

@titianblue, oh that guy. He’s got his own wordpress account, and it is just sad. I tried reading it, and got thoroughly depressed. Last I saw he actually had a date, fucked it up royally, and ran away because a couple of comments weren’t pitying enough. What is it with these guys?

Cthulhu's Intern
7 years ago

I liked his conversation with Pierre, though.
http://pierre.thecomicseries.com/comics/11

freitag235
freitag235
7 years ago

LOL! Poor Pierre. He gets all the sad cases. But this is a keeper.

An Inconvenient Truth
An Inconvenient Truth
7 years ago

Why are there so many of these guys?

Here you go.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
7 years ago

I think the nice guys finish last and bad boys get the girls pop culture myths have convinced a lot of young men that the worse they behave the more likely they are to get what they want.
When it doesn’t work they become angry and double down on the asshattery.

I have no idea what to say about these d00dz who think women should get the death penalty for everything they do.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
7 years ago

My attempt to find the blog of government girlfriends dude ended in failure, but I did find what appears to be India’s answer to The Onion.

http://www.fakingnews.com/2011/09/iit-students-ask-government-to-provide-them-girlfriends/

1 2 3 10