I ran across this remarkable painting, titled “The Irritating Gentleman,” on Sheltered and Safe From Sorrow, a blog devoted to Victorian mourning rituals and other creepiness from that period. The gentleman in question seems to be a Victorian era Pickup Artist in action. He’s even peacocking, Mystery style, with that bow tie and stupid hat and even a non-ironic handlebar moustache. Probably the only thing keeping him from wearing aviator goggles is the fact that airplanes haven’t yet been invented.
What makes it all the worse is that the PUA’s target is clearly in mourning. As the blogger behind rawr I’m a tumblr notes:
She’s wearing all black in 1874. Black gloves, hat, cloak, and dress. In public. The whole nine yards. That’s not a fashion choice or a gothic thing. Back then when people wore all black like that, they were in mourning for someone who died. No one did mourning like the Victorians, that shit was an art form to them.
Someone in her family has died—she could even be a young widow. No one’s accompanying her either. With the carpet bag? She’s traveling alone while still in deep mourning. Look at the closeup. She’s got tears in her eyes. She is upset, devastated in a way that one is only when someone has died. And the guy’s still bothering her, like her problems are flippant bullshit and she needs to just smile or pay attention to him because ladies are supposed to be pleasing for men no matter what shit they’re going through. That’s not a look of “what an ass.” That’s a look of devastation that even in her pain, she’s expected to give people like him focus. She’s not mad. She’s hurt. And to add insult to injury? Everyone would be able to tell. It was a clear sign and still is in ways that someone is mourning, to dress in black crepe like that. He would know why she’s wearing all black, and he’s still demanding her attention.
What an insufferable dick.
Yep.
http://www.morbidoutlook.com/fashion/historical/2001_03_victorianmourn.html
All the coverage about Seville I’ve seen in aus is a bout the disgrace that he was protected. None has been anti victim, maybe we are finally growing up?
I mean Saville not the oranges 🙂
That site reminds me of when I saw one of Victoria’s full mourning dresses in an exhibtion. It was entirely covered in crepe, IIRC, and utterly plain – it hit the eye as a perfect expression of her grief, especially in comparison with more ornate dresses.
Interesting thing I read in a book on her clothes (In Royal Fashion by Kay Staniland) was that she wasn’t strictly speaking in mourning for fourty years, as is often said. In her later life she was simply wearing the clothes of a wealthy, elderly woman – who would often enough wear black anyway – with a slight nod to the fashionable lines of the day.
I highly recommend that book, btw. It’s from an exhibition of Victoria’s and Princess Charlotte of Wales’s clothes and the photos are stunning.
Let us take a moment to acknowledge that someone who is unwelcome and not at all liked continually comes into the space in which he is unwelcome to tell the people who don’t like him about how irrational they’re being for discussing Victorian mourning traditions.
Also, that’s not how Poe’s law works. FYI.
At my grandpa’s funeral last year, some family friend thought it was the perfect time to flirt with me (and not exactly appropriately either). My aunt once told a story about something similar happening at her mother-in-law’s funeral. Are mourning women special PUA targets? Perhaps they are already sufficiently negged by their grief. I must consult the pick up artist forums!
@ Fed Up With the M-sphere
Yes yes yes yes yes. I hate it when men on the street tell me to “smile.” I have a resting face. I see no reason why it has to appeal to your boner.
I wonder what Joe thinks people do in art history classes, or does he think those are imaginary? Oh, well, he’s probably drunk drive-by posting anyway.
I’ve probably said this here before, but the most aggressive and intrusive street harrassment I’ve encountered in years was in the week or two after my old cat died, when I was walking around quite visible grieving (lots of tears, a facial expression that had even the coldest co-workers ask me if I was OK). During that time period the harrassment amped up to a level that I hadn’t experienced since my early to mid teens. So my theory is that it’s about perceived vulnerability – predatory people know that the target isn’t in the right state of mind to be able to fight back effectively.
Joe’s trying to keep up the fine old tradition of “being an entitled dickhead who thinks it’s his God-given right to impose himself on women” exemplified by Mr Crass Red Tie.
@ CassandraSays
I’m sorry you had to put up with that. I think you’re right about the vulnerability. I’ve certainly noticed a lot more harassment when I’m walking alone or with arms full of groceries than when I’m walking in a group or something.
The grocery thing! That’s happened to me too. Also once when I was taking out the (very heavy) trash after cleaning most of my apartment, which was particularly lulzy – dude, really? When your target is sweaty and dirty and carrying a bag full of cat shit?
If my worst street harassment is any indicator of male preference, then apparently guys love SUPER SUNBURNED gals.
Also, I actually did go to the pick up forums and well…
At least the second poster had a reasonable response.
Now I can’t stop looking at that creepy Victorian Tumblr. I found another good potential Manboobz illustration:
https://www.artfinder.com/work/dollbreakers-detail-charles-j-staniland/
“Dollbreakers”!
@Fed Up With the M-Sphere and JustACheeto – it’s even worse than random blokes expecting women to be all bright and smiling and fuck-me welcoming. Women do the “Are you all right? You look worried/sad/angry!” stuff too. My mum and I have had a lifetime of that because our faces at rest are anything but cheerful-looking, regardless of our moods. I’ve never been hit on for that (I’m lucky enough to have had very little harassment at all)* but we’ve both had plenty of acquaintances or workmates come out with that line.
Being extra harassed while grieving or vulnerable – argh, excuse me while I puke. Curious thing, I read an article many years ago where a woman mentioned getting this sort of “Give us a smile, love” shit from guys in the street (workmen, specifically, I think). She used to snap back at them, “Actually, my mother just died” and she said they were always taken aback and apologetic – she’d suddenly gone from nameless sex object to person with a life. Can’t see it working when someone’s targetting you when they know or can see you’re distressed, though.
*isn’t it stupid and rarrrrgh that “not being treated like potentially fuckable meat” is “lucky” instead of “baseline expectation”.
OT to anyone who helped out with my necklace questions yesterday – it’s done, wanna see a photo?
@Kitteh: another lovely photo of your costume skills, And a beach scene too!
@JustACheeto: yes, I had a guy I had never met face-to-face show up to my father’s funeral to pick me up. Friends of mine ran interference thank goodness, and it was made VERY clear that he wasn’t welcome at the wake, nor would he be welcome to contact me in the future either. When someone dies, I have never thought “the funeral will be the perfect place to hit on the bereaved”. Just WTF?
On the painting, are those grey gloves on the seat opposite her? She has her gloves in her lap, so I guess they’re not her’s. Also, I couldn’t tell from the perspective whether they would be too large for her, and was wondering if they were male gloves, for someone who was not grieving.
@Kitteh, we pasted in posting. I would LOVE to see your necklace.
Pls show me the picture!
Kiwi girl – I think the grey thing on the seat is another shawl or blanket. It looks too bulky to be gloves, and there’s more fringing on the edge of it.
That pic of Miss McIver was taken at Urquhart Castle on the shore of Loch Ness. I’ve never been so cold and windswept, and I was worried she’d get blown off that ledge before I could get the pic. She was mega-popular in Scotland, what with her tartan dresses and all. The locals couldn’t believe she was a little Aussie. One guy asked to take her photo ‘cos her face looked like his real kitty. 🙂
And here is the necklace!
Excellent! Well done you!
Thank you! 🙂
@Kitteh thanks and thanks. The necklace is lovely, is it double-stranded or do you have it looped?
Thank you also! 🙂
It’s looped. It was long enough to do so before, but it’s longer with the links instead of thread, which is good. Any necklace I wear has to work with my locket with Mr K’s pic in it.
Had the funniest moment the other day when I was buying a ring. Shop assistant noticed locket, asked who it is (it’s a glass-fronted one so you can see the pic). I said “My other half” and her expression went from interest to a sort of “Oooh” pursed-lips-raised-eyebrows-lucky-you one. 😀
I love the mourning hair brooches and necklaces. It’s interesting how many of the sci fi authors, ( good ones) add Victorian steam punk themes, especially Gibson, Gaiman and Mieville.
There’s an interesting comparison in railway + mourning in Abraham Solomon’s Second Class: the Parting from 1854. The family’s obviously respectable, but probably cash-strapped – the young boy is off to Australia to try to make his fortune, most likely at the goldfields.
I’d guess family, because women that young tended to be unmarried, esp. in the comfortable bourgeoisie. Looking at the style of dress it’s in Central Europe (and the artiste seems not to have left Germany, certainly the rest of his work is clearly German in subject matter), which moves the age of complete mourning down some.
So he’s even creepier.
His hat is middle class, at best. It’s a peaked cloth, not a felted wool/satin. The band is decent, but overall his look is more striving than settled.
lowquacks: The tartan “blanket” looks more like an overcoat draped over the back of the seat to me
That was my first thought, but I found some larger images (it is a moderately well known painting, and last sold for about $50,000US). It’s some sort of lap rug/throw. The only structure appears to be folds, and it has fringe on the selvage.