Time for another peek into the Man Boobz “Trash” folder!
Regular commenters here may have come across the comments of an MRA/MGTOWer calling himself justeunperdant, who has graced the comments section here with sarcastic if often quite surreal remarks which are enhanced, I feel, by his poor command of the English language.
Here’s one of his perplexing little gems (and no, it doesn’t make any more sense in context):
Here’s one that’s slightly less perplexing, though it seems to be based on the notion that Title IX isn’t a law but is actually the name of some dude:
But what you don’t realize is that not all of Mr. justeunperdant’s comments see the light of day. For example, several days ago he tried to post the following comment:
The problem here wasn’t the comment itself, which is fairly typical of MRAs who visit the site; it was that he attached a video that evidently showed pictures of Jodi Arias, now on trial for the murder of her boyfriend, dragging around his dead body. Not particularly wanting such a graphic video up on Man Boobz, I sent justeunperdant’s comment to the trash.
This made him mad:
I didn’t let that one through either. He keeps posting comments; I keep tossing them in the trash.
When MRAs suggest I delete comments because I “can’t handle the truth,” this is the sort of “truth” they’re talking about.
He was around last year, spring-ish? He was working out some issues with the MRM and he decided to work them out on us. He’d get all indignant about how feminist he was and then post someone else’s sexist work and say “I think this is a pretty reasonable take on gender, don’t you agree?” and get mad when people disagreed, until eventually he would see what they were saying and treat it as a learning opportunity in his personal quest to be a better person. He never seemed to grasp that he was hurting real people in the process. We were practice dummies to him.
Eventually he threw a couple of fits when he got called out on some problematic stuff. He said we had no right to get after him since he was better than an MRA (high bar) and that we were picking on him and it was mean and not fair and he was leaving forever!!1!1 only to come back immediately as a sock who said all the right things to get in good with us for a long time before “she” started revealing her true colours.
Also he liked to make sweeping statements about how stupid and deluded religious people are. But AG doesn’t remind me of that bit.
Ugh. Bad taste in the mouth now.
I mean, I freely admit that being around here has been hugely helpful with whole boatloads of my issues. You guys have been pretty awesome about, y’know, being you and exposing and mocking misogyny, and I really needed that.
But deception is deception. Seriously, AtomicG, were you just not paying any attention to the way Pell and MRsteAl got talked about, treated, dissected, banned?
It’s like… yes, this is the internet, and there’s lots of places where you can be anybody you want to be and invent your own persona and be whatever you want. But dammit, when you do that sort of thing it means you don’t WANT to be part of a community, it means you want to be Clever.
John Scalzi has said well; the failure mode of Clever is Asshole.
You tried to be Clever.
We call Asshole.
AG: Seriously? I made a few fraudulent posts here, meanwhile you and others have been sitting in silent hatred of me since the moment I arrived.
Is that what you think?
What I see is people who said they had doubts about you, but who didn’t really act on it; because they were giving you the benefit of the doubt.
You have confessed you made fraudulent posts here, and that you think they shouldn’t have been treated so harshly.
Those are not the same as people, “sitting in silent hatred of [you].” It’s quite convenient the hatred was silent; it means no one can deny it.
Compare my treatment, or lack, of you, to my decidedly less than accepting response to lumi.
See what happened to my view of her, and what has happened to my view of you. Ponder the differences and consider them.
You keep saying, “I have no excuse” and then making excuses. That’s ongoing falsity; not so much to us, but to yourself.
As I like to say, who you pretend to be on the internet, is who you are. You are a liar, and a manipulator. That’s why people are not liking you.
@Pecumium
That comment was more of a reply to this:
“at the risk of sounding like a know-it-all, atomicgrizzly has been annoying the hell out of me every since zie showed up. Too eager, too many comments, too many things skating the edge of being offensive but not enough to call out.”
and this:
“Disingenuous pantload. You skated right to the edge of offensiveness, nothing that could be called outright. I’m sure if I had said something, you’d’ve been all, “who, me?”
Not in regards to everyone. I found it ironic that once they found out I lied they all of the sudden said that I was offending and annoying them the whole time.
“You keep saying, “I have no excuse” and then making excuses.”
Not excuses, explanations. I don’t expect anyone’s view to change because of them. I hurt some people and I have to deal with it.
“John Scalzi has said well; the failure mode of Clever is Asshole.
You tried to be Clever.
We call Asshole.”
Yeah, That about sums it up.
@AtomicGrizzly
I haven’t weighed in on this since I saw it, but here’s my two cents:
I don’t think you’ve set out to harm people here. But that you could see a community who’s general goodwill and willingness to help others has been abused by liars and people who are there in bad faith multiple times (you were around for the Steele reveal, so you at least know about Mister-Al’s form with that), and then do something strikingly similar without considering that it might be a problem doesn’t cast you in a massively positive light – and puts a lot of the regulars on the defensive when people actually do need help and advice. There’s also the idea of you, a man, coming into a predominantly-female/feminist space and through deceit, forcing the women to aid you in something you wanted to do. This is icky, to say the least.
However, you seem to know this, or have learned it, and I believe your apologies. This might be naivety on my part, but I think you are sorry. Cool. So my advice to you, if you want to continue hanging around here and maybe regain some trust, is to stop being on the defensive on this thread. We’ve heard what you have to say, some people will accept it, some people won’t – and that’s their right. You’re the one in the wrong here, so you don’t get to decide if/when people want to welcome you back. On a possibly even more important note, if people decide this kind of shit isn’t easily forgivable, go. Or lurk. the worst thing about recent trolls (Diogenes and Talacaris, among others) is when they know that they’re not wanted in the group, but can’t stand that a group, especially a group of (mainly) women, could have conversations and discussion without their input. This is like male-privilege 101. Also, own your shit. Don’t start every post with an apology, just don’t act like nothing happened and every new thread is a clean slate. This is why people hate Ruby, who advocates rape on one thread then turns up at another to say something bland and inoffensive.
Finally, it’s not lying to be suspicious of someone and not voice it. There were a couple of times that I thought you were a bit ‘off’ too. For example, there was one time that you hadn’t heard of some kind of sexist abuse which pretty much every woman I know has experienced, and every feminist man I know is aware of (can’t remember what it actually was dammit), and it just made me raise my eyebrow a bit. But you know, unless you say something that’s out and out WRONG, people aren’t going to voice thoughts because who really wants to have a fight? I think you just made people’s ears prick up a bit. And surely you can appreciate that a) women are socialised out of being confrontational, and encouraged to be passive, and b) feminist women don’t want to alienate allies for not being doubleplus perfect, but wanted to see how things would pan out. That you keep pushing this really feels like digging a hole to get out of one. People were wary of a stranger. Deal.
I hope you kind of take some of this on board, because as I said at the beginning of this epic post, I don’t think you’re a bad guy. I think you’ve been a bloody twit, but I think you know that. So learn your shit and let’s move on.
That is not irony.
You’re showing a remarkable obtuseness in harping on that, for reasons listed by Natfantastic and others. If I were you, I’d stop digging this particular hole.
@thenatfantastic
Wow, thanks for spelling things out like that. it made a lot of sense.
“This might be naivety on my part, but I think you are sorry.”
Yeah, I am. I was kind of flabbergasted by the response to what I did, and I felt really shitty afterwards. I’m not really social or part of any social groups, so my probably sitcom-esque expectation of things turned out to be wrong.
” there was one time that you hadn’t heard of some kind of sexist abuse which pretty much every woman I know has experienced, and every feminist man I know is aware of (can’t remember what it actually was dammit), and it just made me raise my eyebrow a bit. ”
Thanks for being more specific with this. It’s worth noting that I don’t actually talk with many feminists, and most of my ideas regarding social behavior in relation to gender were conclusions I had come to myself, or from reading thing on the internet. If there’s an concept that I wasn’t aware of, it’s because I really wasn’t aware of it.
I’ve already decided to lurk more, but if everyone decides I need to disappear, I will.
AG: My comment was in reply to everything you said above it; and the things said to you.
The part where I say you are mouthing apologies you don’t really mean… that comment about, “What I was replying to” was exactly the sort of thing I meant.
You keep pretending each person is responding only what you say/did to them: directly.
Sorry, I (at the least) am looking at the entire persona.
I found it ironic that once they found out I lied they all of the sudden said that I was offending and annoying them the whole time.
Dude. I don’t know how long you may have been lurking, or how much backlog you looked at when you decided to perpetrate this little project, but you are wrong.
I’ve been here awhile. I’ve got a sense of the tone people use. You got some serious side-eye well before the reveal. That you were too tone deaf to spot it, well (again) the most charitable thing I can think is you were feeling so clever that you didn’t notice the warning signs.
“You keep saying, “I have no excuse” and then making excuses.”
Not excuses, explanations. I don’t expect anyone’s view to change because of them. I hurt some people and I have to deal with it.
Explanations? No. Look at this one. You are excusing yourself by calling others hypocrites.
It’s not that you can’t become more welome, but right now (at least for me) you aren’t helping yourself, if that’s your aim.
OMG, you’re totally right! Not in the use-us-as-a-support-group sense, but in the entitlement, deception, doing sketchy things and then being surprised when people got angry, and giving narrow not-pologies that aren’t very reassuring.
Here’s Boggi in action for all you new folks.
Gah. Another dreary lying little creep. They must have been on sale at half price somewhere, they’ve flooded the market.