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Orgasms, away?

Fellas! Better hold on to yourselves, because I’ve got some terrible news for you.

Actually, you’d better NOT hold on to yourselves. Because this is the news, straight from that always 100% reliable news source, the Men’s Rights subreddit:

MRalphabet

I wonder if manginal orgasms are still allowed?

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CassandraSays
11 years ago

I’m freaking out that I gave her a dose of the metacam though. The (excellent) vet who treated my old cat was adamant that it should never be used if there were any other options, so I’m worried that the dose I gave her before I realized what it was will hurt her, and I’m angry that the vet gave it to me without even vaguely hinting at possible side effects (also the way they give it to clients removes it from the box, which in the US has a warning label – I would have realized what it was right away if not for that, and it’s pretty sketchy that they did that). I feel like I need to find a new vet, and I’m too worried to go to bed in case the metacam cause adverse effects while I’m asleep.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I’m just doing what you probably already have, Cassandra, and looking up this stuff. I think the problem is with repeated use and particularly with cats who are already in renal failure:

“Most cats who suffer renal failure as a result of using Metacam are suffering from acute renal failure (ARF) and their bloodwork may be extremely high, with creatinine often in the high teens.”

source: http://www.metacamkills.com/

A peer-reviewed journal article cites feline overdose of NSAIDs, including meloxicam, as being a cause of severe kidney damage in cats.[16]

source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metacam#Veterinary_use

blitzgal
11 years ago

or my favourite, joke about your pets dying (if you have rats and cats you’ll get that a lot)… I can’t understand how they don’t just think this, but SAY IT. Wha?

My brother does this. I have a fourteen year old cat who has had problems with IBD her whole life, and nearly died from tainted cat food back in 2009. She pulled through, mainly because she is tiny and eats far less than the cat who DID die of it back then. Anyway, she keeps losing weight and the vet is convinced it’s intestinal lymphoma, even though I’ve been juggling several types of food because the two boys are fat and need diet food. I have ethical concerns with putting an animal through traumatic cancer treatment, so have consented to steroids only, which is also a treatment for IBD. And everyone is on full calorie food again. (Update is she’s started to gain weight again after only one week of being back on full calorie food)

Anyway, my brother’s constant response whenever I have an ill cat is that he would be happy to shoot it for me (he’s a hunter). So fucking cruel and it makes me so angry every time. When he puts it on my Facebook it gets deleted immediately.

pecunium
11 years ago

hrovotnir: I was front desk, so I did intake,and discharge; we also did dispensing, and some explaining. Record keeping and client comfort.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

Anyway, my brother’s constant response whenever I have an ill cat is that he would be happy to shoot it for me (he’s a hunter). So fucking cruel and it makes me so angry every time. When he puts it on my Facebook it gets deleted immediately.

THAT IS FUCKING WRONG.

Likewise guys who brag about how they cruelly killed an animal once, and expect you to be IMPRESSED by the story, even if they know you’re an animal lover or even animal rights person, because they’ve read some shitty article somewhere about how women instinctively want a man who’s capable of killing stuff so the story about how he drowned his girlfriend’s cat when she got tired of it or killed a poor rabbit as part of survival training in the army or some shit like that is gonna make you go all gina tingly.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

@Kittehs

I did look into all that stuff back when my previous cat got sick. I’m just really shocked that a. they gave it to me and b. with no warning about potential side effects and c. with the warning label removed via repackaging. And now I just gave her some of her favorite food and she’s not eating it, when normally she scarfs it immediately, so I’m even more worried.

It’s definitely more of a risk with older cats and cats with pre-existing kidney issues, but I’ve heard far too many cases of young healthy cats experiencing acute renal failure within days of taking this stuff not to be very worried.

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
11 years ago

Yeah, the background noise of ‘acceptable’ jokes about killing cats or being cruel to them wasn’t funny to begin with.

After my kitten got sick and passed away in my arms… that shit just don’t fly with me.

atomicgrizzly
atomicgrizzly
11 years ago

@Dvärghundspossen

I feel the exact same way. I hate how for some reason killing animals = manly in our culture, so people go around bragging about it and posting pictures on Facebook. I don’t wanna see that shit.

katz
11 years ago

Anyway, my brother’s constant response whenever I have an ill cat is that he would be happy to shoot it for me (he’s a hunter). So fucking cruel and it makes me so angry every time. When he puts it on my Facebook it gets deleted immediately.

What. An. Asshole.

I’ve told this story before, but when my hamster died, my dad joked about cutting off its head and sticking it in the freezer. So yeah, we’re no longer talking.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@blitzgal

Seconding “THAT IS FUCKING WRONG.” I will never understand siblings who are cruel to each other (or won’t listen when told they are being cruel). My sister and I are very close and so, while I know lots of siblings who aren’t, I will never understand it.

I’m sorry you have to deal with that.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

A year ago I was at an event in a park which was arranged by Bodytåget, an EBM (style of music) club my husband started up with two friends and still helps running to some extent. Two guys I know a little bit started joking about catching, killing and cooking a little toy dog that was running around off leash (although mummy was around). I just glared at them and said something like
– Jokes about killing animals aren’t funny.
And they felt obviously awkward and started to explain away everything and I just gave another glare and went.
Right then I felt SO GOOD about having a certain amount of social status. I’m a university professor which is a high status job, plus in the EBM circles I’m the wife of Alexander who started this club and arranges all these concerts, which automatically confers a certain level of status. Fifteen years ago when I was a club scene nobody and just a poor student with working class parents I just wouldn’t have been able to pull off that glare. Or, I could have glared of course, but I wouldn’t have gotten anything like that reaction.

I’m not even sure where I’m going with this… except that thinking about killing animal jokes made me think about this incident which in turn made me think about how much social status affects our lives.

pecunium
11 years ago

I don’t get the, “jokes” about killing animals.

I’ve had to deal with, “varmints”, because of chickens, geese, guinea pigs, rabbits, and fruit crops. It’s not “fun”, it’s a task.

If a predatory animal isn’t being predatory, I leave them alone.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Dvärghundspossen

My sister has a “Stop That Right Now” look that she’s developed as a teacher and it is so awesome to see her whip that out at teenagers who are pulling stuff they would never do if they knew a parent or teacher who cared was around. It isn’t quite social status, but it is related as she never would have developed it in a different career.

Good for you for enforcing good social norms, though. Too often people just do nothing.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

You can develop useful skills when working with kids.

My husband used to work at daycare years ago. Once when his band had been playing a concert, another of the guys in the band got way too drunk afterwards, and started insulting a guy who was twice his size. The guy twice his size got an iron pipe from somewhere and tiny-drunk-band-member got something to defend himself with despite not standing a chance. People got really worried and called the police. Husband (who was also a bit drunk but isn’t in the habit of getting violent or nasty regardless of alcohol levels) sort of fell into daycare mode, stepped in between the guys and went:
– Look, I understand that you’re very mad because he called you bad names. And that’s a bad thing to do. But even if someone calls you bad names, you’re not allowed to hit anyone, especially not someone who’s smaller than you
to the big guy with the iron pipe, and then he went
– Now, you’re really not allowed to call people bad names. You must understand that he gets angry and hurt when you say things like that
to tiny-drunk-band-member and
– NOW APOLOGISE AND MAKE UP.
to both.
All in typical, patient speaking-to-little-children voice.
I was standing a few metres away just waiting for at least big guy with iron pipe to hit him, but the amazing thing was that both would-be fighters just dropped their stuff, said “sorry” and walked off. I told husband that he was like a super hero – “THE AMAZING DAYCARE-MAN!”.

Then the cops came, but there was nothing left for them to do.

Almost all children in Sweden are at daycare while their parents work from age 1,5 or so till age 6… Guess by the time you get out you’re heavily conditioned to respond to daycare talk.

katz
11 years ago

Dvarg, I wish I had that kind of clout. When I tried to talk to my dad, he insisted it was fine because lots of people make fun of their pets and it became one of those “Well, I guess we can accommodate our oversensitive daughter and not make dead-pet jokes in front of her if she just won’t be reasonable.”

Is there a trick to being on the right side of social interactions? I always feel like I end up being considered the rude one who needs to apologize and change her attitude, even when other people were being hurtful to me, and sometimes when I wasn’t even present. I should ask Captain Awkward.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@Dvärghundspossen

That is a great story.

CassandraSays
11 years ago

What’s your persona like in general? When I want to make it clear that I Do Not Approve of things I tend to go for a persona that’s half Granny Weatherwax and half Brit Shocked by your Appalling Rudeness.

Dvärghundspossen
11 years ago

@Katz: I guess most parents will always consider themselves “above” their kids, and so glaring and going “that’s not funny” won’t work. The shitty thing about social status is that it’s just something other people confer on you. And once they’ve conferred it on you, it gives you power to like, glare and go dead-pan, in various situations. Which is a great power to have.

Maybe there are also tricks to be learnt, as Some Gal’s sister seems to. Maybe Captain Awkward would know. For my own part, I just feel that when I was younger people would often look down on me, and now when I’m 35 and in possession of various status markers such as a doctor’s degree and a husband who’s well-known in certain circles, things are different. But that’s not exactly useful advice I could give out to others: “Just get a doctor’s degree and a well-known husband and everything will be alright!”.
And yeah, I’m white and skinny, that probably helps, although on this point I have nothing to compare with.

Some Gal Not Bored at All

@katz

Parents are hard. I keep trying to get through to my mom that many of her values are NOT OK, but I’m her daughter and will always be younger than she is so she is always quick to dismiss me. I try to bring in backup with other examples of people who find it wrong, but she just gets insulting. (She told me my boyfriend’s parents must cheat on their taxes because they vote liberal.) Lately, I have been sort if getting through to her on how she talks about/deals with work, and frankly I’m surprised. Basically, I’ve just started emphasizing that she controls what she thinks about and she doesn’t have to hate everybody and everything. (Not applicable to better and less depressed people than my mother, I think.)

CassandraSays
11 years ago

With parents I think the only real social power you have is the power to potentially withdraw your company if they refuse to stop bullying you. And bullying is exactly what it sounds like is happening in katz’s case. I have an uncle like that. It’s a lot easier to avoid an uncle than a parent, unfortunately.

katz
11 years ago

She told me my boyfriend’s parents must cheat on their taxes because they vote liberal.

Wait, what?

Is that a stereotype now?

katz
11 years ago

With parents I think the only real social power you have is the power to potentially withdraw your company if they refuse to stop bullying you.

Right, but that still casts you as the unreasonable person because now you aren’t even trying to talk about it and be reasonable, and now the entire extended family is involved too and you become the person everyone has to plan everything around because there are other family members you won’t talk to.

(Sorry, I’m just a total pile of unresolved parent issues.)

CassandraSays
11 years ago

So they frame any of the other people of your generation (siblings, cousins) that way or is it just you? A lot of families do this thing where they pick one person to be the target, and I’m not sure there’s anything you can do other than walk away if that’s what’s happening.

With your dad it sounds like he thinks it’s hilarious to make you upset (my uncle is like that too). The only things I ever found to work were to either a. not visibly respond or b. get even nastier back. But again, easier to do that with someone who’s not a parent.

LBT
LBT
11 years ago

RE: katz

Right, but that still casts you as the unreasonable person because now you aren’t even trying to talk about it and be reasonable, and now the entire extended family is involved too and you become the person everyone has to plan everything around because there are other family members you won’t talk to.

I have found the only way to beat this ‘game’ is not to play. To stop giving a damn whether they see me as unreasonable or not, because let’s face it, I ain’t a mind-controller, thus I am never going to win that fight. (Nor would I really want to.) As long as you care how they see you, you’re going to be in their power, regardless of how far away from them you are.

Then again, I avoid nearly all of my family and lie my face off to all of them. It cuts down on the amount of lying and heartache required.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Ditto to “stuff unreasonable parents/family”. If you’re not forced to live with them or depend on them financially, then they can go fuck themselves with a Lego if they think joking about animal cruelty, much less bragging about it, is funny. Do they think joking about killing human babies is funny or acceptable? Then neither is this.