So, “Nice Guys” are causing a stir on the Internet again, thanks largely to a new(ish) Tumblr blog called “Nice Guys” of Ok Cupid, which posts selected highlights from the OKCupid profiles of self-proclaimed “nice guys” who make it very clear, in their profiles and in their answers to OKCupid’s “match” questions, that they are in fact anything but nice.
Some of them are actual or potential date rapists, convinced that women that they’re “nice” to owe them sex. Others are bitter from too many rejections, and launch long tirades in their profiles about how women are bitches and whores. Still others are clueless on a more fundamental level, declaring that women have “an obligation to shave their legs” and otherwise prettify themselves for men while noting that they themselves only shower or brush their teeth occasionally.
It’s not clear how any of this is supposed to convince the women of OKCupid that these angry, ranting, hapless-yet-entitled “nice guys” are indeed as “nice” as advertised, much less convince any rational human being to have sex with them.
The site is a goldmine of unintentional self-revelation — as is a similar site with the name of, er, OKCupid Goldmine — and I’ve spent hours looking through the pictures on both sites and discussing them with friends. The only reason I haven’t linked to it in the past is that neither of them blur out the faces of the people they feature, which seems to me a pretty major invasion of privacy. (As you no doubt have noticed, I’ve taken the liberty of somewhat creeepily disguising the faces of the guys in the pics I’m posting here.) But “Nice Guys of OKCupid has been pretty widely discussed, linked to by Jezebel (1, 2) and The Guardian and even the Men’s Rights subreddit, to mention merely a few examples; Ok Cupid Goldmine is also provoking discussions. Posts on both sites regularly get dozens if not hundreds of comments and reblogs on Tumblr. The cat’s already out of the bag.
Here are a couple more of these “Nice Guys” with their faces all spiral-ized:
I’m assuming that Dio’s teaching career went a little something like this:
http://youtu.be/18t5V3gvfa4
Oh god, neti pots. For all my experience with sinus troubles, I could never bear to use such a thing. I was a swimmer as a small child, and it gave me a strong aversion to water going up my nose. D:
Also, damn, missed the language geekery. I took French in middle school for a bit, but couldn’t keep up. People act like Japanese is hard, but no way, French was WAY tougher for me. I could manage the Rs, but god damn, so many vowels.
This is a hoot!
http://niceguysofwesteros.tumblr.com/
I wish Neti Pots worked for me. I have awful allergies and the worst sinuses, and I guess they’re too bad for the water to get through. It just sits in my nose and drips out…one…drop…….at………a…….time and I sit there feeling like I’m drowning as I wait. Maybe I should try the squeeze bottle type of pot instead of the teapot kind.
RE: lauralot89
Hey, if you have upper respiratory tract kind of allergies like me, you can try raw local honey. It sounds doofy, and it doesn’t work for everybody, but it was a godsend for me. I used to get whacked with a sinus infection every year, and now, whenever I move, I shell out to get my hands on raw local honey. (The local is important so the bees are working with the same pollens and such you’re allergic to, raw because it keeps the pollens intact.) Stir some into my tea or yogurt every day, and within a month or two, my allergies are gone.
For a second there I thought you meant use honey in a Neti Pot, and I was very confused.
That too. My beau generally tries to keep stubble free, which suits me more because stubbly kisses tend to make me laugh more than they turn me on, but it’s not a requirement, it’s not even something I asked him to do, he just generally likes to stay clean shaven because he doesn’t like the way his face feels with hair on it. And funnily enough, I don’t feel the need to spend my days negging men with facial hair about how horribly unkempt they are and how it’s totally way harder to make out with a bearded dude.
I don’t know if I wouldn’t have dated my beau if he’d had facial hair, I like him quite a bit, so I’m loathe to think it would have had that much of a bearing, but even if it had, I’m pretty sure I would have been able to either decide it wasn’t a drawback at all because he’s awesome or decide I didn’t like him enough and moved on. You know, like an adult, who respects other adults, instead of trying to manipulate them into being what I want them to be.
And damn, I am being way nicer than I should be, considering we’re all supposedly just a bunch of mean mean meanies who HAAAAAAATE all teh white menz.
Anyway, lowquacks, glad to hear things are looking up your way, fire is some super scary stuff.
Also, hellkell, I wish I could claim the internet for myself, but that prize belongs to Melissa McEwan of the Shakesville blog, who’s used it for a while, I think.
RE: Lauralot89
D: NEVER SAY SUCH THINGS
Repeating a ridiculous statement doesn’t make it any less ridiculous.
Although, as Hellkell pointed out, your original statement was in fact “Oral is impossible on a woman who doesn’t trim well.” So you’re already backtracking.
But what you’re saying still doesn’t make physiological sense, unless you have an oral technique that’s more focused on the mons veneris than the clitoris and labia.
“If you have questions, talk to Argenti.”
You actually want me to play Spot That Fallacy!! on him? I suppose it might scare him off with the tedium…
Re: neti pots — I could never use one for the same reason as LBT, to much time swimming and argh water up my nose! My anti-histamine as sleeping pill dries my sinuses into oblivion though, so I picked up cheap saline nose spray, works well.
This topic has inspired me to skip shaving for a month. Normally I do it if I want to but not now.
My partner will be happy about less time spent showering.
I was thinking that Dumbass’s original statement probably indicates inexperience or downright incompetence. Neither would surprise me. Nothing wrong with inexperience, of course, only with making sweeping BS statements about things you don’t know about, ignoring the statements by those who do know what they’re talking about, and then lying about your original statement. Which is of course Dumbass’s approach to everything.
re grooming. At brunch I had my hair down, and someone asked me if I realised the amount of time/work I spent on it (mostly moving back over my ears).
When we left I mentioned it, because he never would have noticed a woman doing it… she’s supposed to have long hair.
As to Diogenes: <a href =http://ethnographymatters.net/2013/01/08/ethnography-and-the-troll-space-workarounds-discipline-jumping-and-ethical-pitfalls-1-of-3/ Part one, of three, of an ethnographer’s study of trolling
You may recognise some of the behaviors.
…epic link fail, do you need the code or did you just get ahead of yourself?
As for hair, try growing it as long as it’ll go, forget getting in the way while eating, I’ve got to rein it in to play or it ends up in my strings! (I’m lazy, hair cuts cost money, and involve people touching me, and on my head, tend to look terrible, so I said fuck it and let it grow)
The sad thing is that not one of these human scum realizes that the reason they’re striking out is the very crap that keeps coming out of their mouths. When I was a member of OK Cupid I shot down more than a few of these self-entitled creeps. Not a single one of them ever got the message that the problem was in himself. Instead they go from bad to worse.
This, however, is not a reflection on OK Cupid, which was a dating site I used with some success until I met a REAL man on another excellent site: Zoosk.
Just shows, if you want to find a prince you have to go through a lot of frogs (with apologies to frogs everywhere).
Yeah. Sometimes when you don’t respond they attack your inbox with swears. And say they didn’t think you were attractive and blah blah blah. All I think is why the hell should I care if they found me attractive or not.
I’ve met guys from okcupid that I liked, but sometimes we had differences that weren’t gonna magically resolve themselves.
Okcupid is a lot of misses and occasional hits.
Looks like I forgot to close the tag. I was rushing, since I needed to get to work.
An ethnographer’s study of trolling, part one of three
As for hair… My last haircut (basically to my scalp) was on 06 Jun, 2007, at about 4 in the afternoon. I did it myself, because my barber failed me, and I had to be in regs for formation the next morning.
Two weeks later I, effectively, quit the Army.
“Two weeks later I, effectively, quit the Army.”
Well that was a waste of a haircut! 5 years ago, yours must be to your waist now as well. Gotta love the “damnit, I’m flossing with my hair again” moments!
I used to use my hair for sewing on occasion. Deliberately, that is.
Lol, mine’s way too thin for that!
My hair is my one good genetic inheritance from my father! 😀
Lol, unfair! I failed to get the red head gene from mine! (Not that this stops me from dying it red tinged)
I got the merest hint of the red gene from my mum’s side. She’s blond but most of her siblings were various degrees of red (Irish trumps Sorb, lol). My natural colour could best be described as mousy brown, but the red shows in a nasty tendency to turn ginger at the ends when it’s coloured. I have a dark brown colour through it that’s violet based rather than any reddish tones. Rather necessary to combat teh ebil sun!