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“Nice Guys” on parade

NG1

So, “Nice Guys” are causing a stir on the Internet again, thanks largely to a new(ish) Tumblr blog called “Nice Guys” of Ok Cupid, which posts selected highlights from the OKCupid profiles of self-proclaimed “nice guys” who make it very clear, in their profiles and in their answers to OKCupid’s “match” questions, that they are in fact anything but nice.

Some of them are actual or potential date rapists, convinced that women that they’re “nice” to owe them sex. Others are bitter from too many rejections, and launch long tirades in their profiles about how women are bitches and whores. Still others are clueless on a more fundamental level, declaring that women have “an obligation to shave their legs” and otherwise prettify themselves for men while noting that they themselves only shower or brush their teeth occasionally.

It’s not clear how any of this is supposed to convince the women of OKCupid  that these angry, ranting, hapless-yet-entitled “nice guys” are indeed as “nice” as advertised, much less convince any rational human being to have sex with them.

The site is a goldmine of unintentional self-revelation — as is a similar site with the name of, er, OKCupid Goldmine —  and I’ve spent hours looking through the pictures on both sites and discussing them with friends. The only reason I haven’t linked to it in the past is that neither of them blur out the faces of the people they feature, which seems to me a pretty major invasion of privacy. (As you no doubt have noticed, I’ve taken the liberty of somewhat creeepily disguising the faces of the guys in the pics I’m posting here.) But “Nice Guys of OKCupid has been pretty widely discussed, linked to by Jezebel (1, 2) and The Guardian and even the Men’s Rights subreddit, to mention merely a few examples; Ok Cupid Goldmine is also provoking discussions. Posts on both sites regularly get dozens if not hundreds of comments and reblogs on Tumblr. The cat’s already out of the bag.

Here are a couple more of these “Nice Guys” with their faces all spiral-ized:

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CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

I can’t actually think of any breed of dog that would fit. I don’t really like Alsatians, but that’s a personal thing (lived near a really mean one as a kid, so I’m a bit wary of them), but they’re still far too noble an animal to be compared to Frothy.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

He’s sort of like Gaspode without the intelligence.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Or the people skills.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

This analogy would work so perfectly if he just made friends with NWO, who’s our version of Foul Ol Ron.

pecunium
11 years ago

Planaria?

Guinea Worms?

princessbonbon
11 years ago

Titam Arum…

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

ROFL – Owly as Foul Ole Ron, that’s perfect!

Though “Buggrit! Buggrit! Millennium hand and shrimp!” or “Spiders… spiders… mumble-mumble-muhhuh. Sticking like sticky paper, and lying. Millenium hand and shrimp! Lying!” are more coherent and intelligible than some of Owly’s efforts.

Dumbass the Yapper is some sort of chronic minor irritant. A low-grade pest.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Hey now, planaria are little more than the aquarium version of a hangnail, except even less annoying — in the grand scheme of things they aren’t worth noticing…which I guess fits Diogenes the Dull. I’m thinking guinea worm is about the right level of annoying if dealt with, harmful if not.

Seriously though, snails are a much bigger pest than planaria. (Says the Keeper of Random Aquaria Related Facts 🙂 )

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

And we need a Steele / Mr. Al check badly, last time I remember a 1,000+ comment thread it was him going on about the definition of misandry.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

There was one recently before you came back – though we pushed it for that deliberately. I think it might have been the one with Bob and his Rapture Fiancee.

I thought I was the only one still online now and everyone else had gone to bed! 😛

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

I’m still here, just watching Louis Theroux documentaries and eating and occasionally joining my siblings at watching the awful awful so bad it’s nearly not good anymore second Dungeons & Dragons film

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

So, you reckon one of the Pube Terror films might be a better bet?

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Earwigs would work, wouldn’t they?

@ lowquacks

Speaking of Theroux, I just saw something interesting about him the other day. Apparently he was the first person to openly question Jimmy Saville about the potential inappropriateness of the way he was interacting with the children he was “helping”.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

pecunium

I already told Nepenthe this. If its written in a specific script, and limited to the place and time I am familiar with, and in a context I understand, I can slug through Aramaic. I have nothing near fluency.

On a somewhat related note, I just realized that I am missing 3 of my Aramaic dictionaries, and one is out of print, so I can’t get it again. Thats pretty frustrating. Seriously. I want to punch things now. I hate losing books.

I am well aware I am not loved here. Thats not going to keep me up at night.

Born in Iran. That’s Asia. I was curious how many knee-jerks would shout that I’m white. Its treated like a scarlet letter here. Insofar as identity goes, I don’t really know how white I am. I’m listed as Caucasian, but my complexion is bronze. It was kinda interesting to see how the race accusations went around here. Leaving things deliberately vague created that. I wanted to see what conclusions people would jump to, and I’m a bit disappointed that my suspicion was correct; that the general atmosphere here is hostile to white men for being white men.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Nah, earwigs are kinda cute. (Well I did read Gerald Durrell when I was a kid.)

Now silverfish, they’re creepy little pests.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Oh, and a slight correction on that other thread.

You said the Romans couldn’t adapt to horse archers. But you just flubbed the Persian Empire that first did it. It was the Parthians, not the Sassanids who introduced the compound bow.

It wiped out 7 legions in 2 days once.

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

Yeah, the atmosphere on this blog written and run by a white man with many well-respected white-dude commenters is definitely incredibly hostile to white men.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Sorry, lowquacks, but ever since you posted a picture the other day showing that you’re a white dude I just don’t think I can talk to you any more. I’m also planning to disown my dad, just in case the hivemind gets mad at me if I don’t.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Cassandra, lowquacks

If you don’t see it, its probably because its not directed at you. My whiteness has been mentioned pejoratively before.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Was that when you decided to say you’re a white cis-normal male? Because frankly, white is the least important part of that (well either that or male), I, for one, am still trying to figure out just how offensive “cis-normal” is.

Pecunium — he’s apparently as fluent in Aramic as I am in French, which is to say not at all, combined with a headache when I try. (French is not motherfucking Latin based!)

Silverfish definitely works.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

It is too! I found that after taking Latin for a couple of years several other languages suddenly got a lot easier. Shame I’ve forgotten most of it now.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Italian, Spanish, sure, French just makes my head hurt (I can apparently half read Romanian, as I found when flipped through some Ikea instructions — “wtf is this, I can almost make sense of it” is always fun!)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

It’s French pronunciation that kills me. My mouth just doesn’t seem to want to do it right. I tend to refuse to speak French even when I know what someone is asking me and how to respond because I feel so self-conscious about my accent. I end up sounding like the Queen, it’s ridiculous. Blame it on my upper class twit of a French teacher.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I sometimes wish I’d taken French at school, but I had no interest in it at the time, so did German instead. Not that high school French would have been a huge help with the sort of books I’d need it for – histories and biographies that haven’t been translated, or the collections of Mr K’s correspondence (drool).

Still, not knowing the language has had its benefits: when I heard him use a bizarre endearment (I heard it in English) to a new kitty, and was told afterward by a French mate that the French term – words I didn’t know – is an old endearment, I was pretty chuffed.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Took French.

Only used it once ever. At the airport an older Haitian lady was confused about her flight time, and the baggage rules. Well, the stereotypical conversations printed in French textbooks finally came in handy!

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