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“Nice Guys” on parade

NG1

So, “Nice Guys” are causing a stir on the Internet again, thanks largely to a new(ish) Tumblr blog called “Nice Guys” of Ok Cupid, which posts selected highlights from the OKCupid profiles of self-proclaimed “nice guys” who make it very clear, in their profiles and in their answers to OKCupid’s “match” questions, that they are in fact anything but nice.

Some of them are actual or potential date rapists, convinced that women that they’re “nice” to owe them sex. Others are bitter from too many rejections, and launch long tirades in their profiles about how women are bitches and whores. Still others are clueless on a more fundamental level, declaring that women have “an obligation to shave their legs” and otherwise prettify themselves for men while noting that they themselves only shower or brush their teeth occasionally.

It’s not clear how any of this is supposed to convince the women of OKCupid  that these angry, ranting, hapless-yet-entitled “nice guys” are indeed as “nice” as advertised, much less convince any rational human being to have sex with them.

The site is a goldmine of unintentional self-revelation — as is a similar site with the name of, er, OKCupid Goldmine —  and I’ve spent hours looking through the pictures on both sites and discussing them with friends. The only reason I haven’t linked to it in the past is that neither of them blur out the faces of the people they feature, which seems to me a pretty major invasion of privacy. (As you no doubt have noticed, I’ve taken the liberty of somewhat creeepily disguising the faces of the guys in the pics I’m posting here.) But “Nice Guys of OKCupid has been pretty widely discussed, linked to by Jezebel (1, 2) and The Guardian and even the Men’s Rights subreddit, to mention merely a few examples; Ok Cupid Goldmine is also provoking discussions. Posts on both sites regularly get dozens if not hundreds of comments and reblogs on Tumblr. The cat’s already out of the bag.

Here are a couple more of these “Nice Guys” with their faces all spiral-ized:

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timetravellingfool
11 years ago

BAhahahahahha!! There was someone out there who thinks it’s impossible to do oral on an untrimmed women? Oh mercy and good heavens- when I was a wee lass and men were men they used to plow through a veritable thicket to get the job done, and they never complained. Kids these days, with their waxing and whining about how hard everything is and why can’t women just shave everything if they want sexual reciprocation- look, you are in or you’re out. If you are not into sex with a lady with a flaming bush, quietly stand in a corner and cry about it. If you’re in, welcome to the grown-ups club!

cloudiah
11 years ago

Sometimes I just brush my looooooong pubes off to the side with an ornate hair comb.

timetravellingfool
11 years ago

grumbles, you like shaved legs, that’s fine- find yourself a crowd that agrees with you and pat yourselves on the back about how right you are for that preference. You will find no friends here.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Look, thats the standard today.

You shower regularly, wash hands several times a day, etc. Its in the basics of taking care of yourself. Not that I think every woman has to shave her legs, but wearing shorts with hairy legs is the social equivalent of not showering for a week.

As for me, I pluck, shave, trim, dilapidate, and use a razor regularly. I do it because I want to be attractive to women. And as for a couple? Yeah, I think its ok for partners to express preferences, and for them to accommodate one another as well. That goes both ways.

timetravellingfool
11 years ago

@ Cloudiah- corn row that shit- it’s great practice for when you have to corn row the back of your head.

cloudiah
11 years ago

Some Gal — cool! Send me tips. XD
TTF — I’m picturing guys hacking their way through a dense, spiny blackberry bush.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
11 years ago

@Grumbles

unless you’re talking about someone who likes to shave sometimes but prefers being hairy other times.

Read the whole damn thread. This is like talking to someone who claims he did the homework and the dog ate it. (Hint: I am. I am that person. I doubt I am that uncommon.)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

@ lumi

Yeah, it’s not like you don’t (in most cases) want your kids to have a close relationship with their grandparents, but that does mean that sometimes you have to gently intervene when they’re trying to pass on some of their more unhelpful ideas. I had to intervene because Mr C’s mom was making his nephew cry a couple of times (her idea of discipline is berating kids by telling them what terrible people they are, not super helpful when the kid in question is 4).

@ ttf

Dudes like our clueless friend make me want to tell people that I have a bush like a jungle, complete with large predatory animals and singing lizards, just to get them to go away.

timetravellingfool
11 years ago

@ Cynic- nope, it’s a sexual norm, not a hygienic norm. Scrape every hair off your body if you like, but don’t expect everyone to follow suit without a big fight, because it’s a royal pain in the ass with the most dumbest of motivators- to please one’s manfriend. My man friend can bite my long, flowing rectal hairs.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

lol

And you think I have any interest in you?

Serjeant Grumbles
Serjeant Grumbles
11 years ago

It is extra impossible to snuggle a long-haired cat with your face. This is why my face is covered in terrible lacerations and I spend every day at the ER.

Key difference is that you aren’t licking your cat. At least I hope you aren’t, because your human tongue isn’t made for grooming cat fur.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

It’s a trollsplosion!

Hair is unhygenic, folks. We should all shave our heads right now lest strangers think that we don’t bathe.

lowquacks
lowquacks
11 years ago

@Diogenes

No, I agree. Have you seen how many unhygenic dudes there are around these days?

cloudiah
11 years ago

The only truly attractive woman is one with alopecia universalis, apparently.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Diogenes: too bad you can’t pluck and trim your personality into something more attractive to anyone.

Here’s something more interesting than Dingleberry’s thought on pubes. Our new kitteh:

http://www.austinpetsalive.org/adopt/available-cat-details/?ID=17236168#

Trip won’t be his name. More pics when I get off my dead ass and get batteries.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

timetraveling

Wait, so you don’t think pleasing your partner is important?

Seriously? Both sides gotta reciprocate. You better believe it that when I’m with a girl, and she prefers me in French cuffs to regular shirts, I’ll wear those more often. Short beard vs. long? If she thinks one is more attractive than the other, thats what she gets. I don’t know what type of relationships you have, but I think its totally cool for partners to accommodate one another.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

OMG did anyone catch this?

DtD “As for me, I pluck, shave, trim, dilapidate, and use a razor regularly.”

Dilapidate. DILAPIDATE.

::dies::

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Diogenes: Like when you’re with a girl is a thing that happens.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
11 years ago

Kitty is adorable! If you could record her meows they’d be a lot more interesting than anything Frothy r Grumbles have said so far too.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

There was no verb form that I can think of. What should I have written?

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

hellkell he’s beautiful!!!!!

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

hellkell

Certainly I have been cut to the quick.

My fragile ego has been shattered. I will cry myself to sleep tonight.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

It’s “depilate,” moron. But I would believe you’re all run down and busted.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Diogenes, the word is DEPILATE. Dilapidation is having fallen into disrepair.

Some Gal Not Bored at All
Some Gal Not Bored at All
11 years ago

@Diogenes

Funny, the examples you give are of doing something MORE OFTEN not all the time and of already limiting the choices before asking. Do you not see how you expect to be accommodated differently than you are willing to accommodate?

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