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$MONEY$ cock blockade dozens of upvotes evil women evo psych fairy tales I'm totally being sarcastic men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA oppressed men paranoia playing the victim precious bodily fluids reddit spermjacking

Men’s Rights Redditor warns men: “Be careful with your sperm. Your very freedom is at stake.”

Men: Protect your Purity of Essence
Men: Protect your Purity of Essence

It’s official: Men’s Rights Activists are more obsessed with their “precious bodily fluids” than Dr. Strangelove’s General Jack D. Ripper. Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, many of the regulars are celebrating Boxing Day by sitting around on their computers worrying about evil predatory succubi burgling their sperm. Check out this little post, which has gotten 90 upvotes so far:

MRspermworth92k

Yes, he really did just say “It’s as if your penis shoots magic IOUs every time you ejaculate.” If this is true, a lot of guys owe millions if not billions of dollars to a lot of old socks.

In the comments, other Men’s Rightsers shared their deepest concerns about the specter of spermburgling. SuicideBanana warns that the enemy may already be in your bed:

MRspermBoogywoman

Reconstrucht worries about the money-hungry sperm-hunters lurking in bars:

MRspermPredatory

And one future veterinarian contemplates giving up dating, in order to protect himself from the hypothetical women — sorry, soul sucking succubi — who might hypothetically use his future sperm in order to cash in big on his future vet money. Ca-ching!

MRspermSuccubus

Gentlemen: To fully protect your Essence, I suggest you ejaculate directly into a paper shredder, douse the results with hot sauce and arsenic, and pour the entire concoction into the nearest garbage disposal. Then flee the country.

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Tina
Tina
11 years ago

I skimmed what he said, hit that number and “social interactions” and stopped reading. The misreading comprehension is mine. I’m still a prude. This number was …distressing.

Good night, all. Happy New Year.

katz
11 years ago

A Pierre thread. Mostly just as a placeholder so I don’t have to go hunting for people’s ideas.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“Read all the Norse and Greek myths when I was a kid. But were not talking about myths now. Were talking about the Bible.”

*dies*

I’m sorry, I can’t cath up on the thread, seeing how I’m dead now.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

“Even if I don’t succeed in proving its music, I will have succeeded in proving one possibility that it is not.”

It isn’t round.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Quick! Is Pierre a paramedic too? We need cyber CPR over here!

John Anderson
John Anderson
11 years ago

@ CassandraSays

“Why do you think it’s OK that people in your movement think this way?

(Please note – in cases where the father was raped I would 100% agree that he should not bear any financial responsibility for any resulting children.)”

I don’t agree with them, but I blame feminists or progressives for the attitude. They are the people who came up with the idea of reproductive rights. I think the right to an abortion fails within the right to bodily autonomy. So a man can’t force his rapist to abort regardless of how distressing that is.

Reproduction is a privilege afforded to women as a raped man has no ability to prevent fatherhood and no man (in the U.S.) has the ability as for as I know to force a woman to carry to term. This is also the way that it should be. One feminist friend wants to agree with me, but she’s uncomfortable calling it a privilege so we refer to it as a pright when conversing. I wouldn’t mind referring to it as that if you like.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Dumbass the dumb, D&C is a surgical abortion, and the only option after 12 weeks, it’s wtf is between a medical abortion and a D&X

Please learn to google.

lauralot89
11 years ago

Argenti Aertheri, that’s one of my favorite SCPs! Right up there with the world’s best tothbrush and the cup that affixes itself to your hand. And the pufferkittens.

katz
11 years ago

Do we have any pictures of Tom Martin, btw?

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Shit, that was John, not dumbass the dumb…the stupidity all blends together.

Bee
Bee
11 years ago

Katz, you can find a buncha them if you google “tom martin lse.”

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Lol, YES! And Josie the half cat, and the tank of clown loaches, totally want that one (1938)

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

That was Anderson the Dumbass who doesn’t know what surgery means.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Well, this is highbrow.

lauralot89
11 years ago

The half-cat! How could I forget the half-cat? That and the Harmless Kitten are also classics.

For the actual creepy ones, I love the bone hive and the abandoned amusement park. It’s been way too long since I checked out the Foundation.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Well, this is highbrow.

Says the kid who resorts to “You don’t have any friends!” in just about every thread.

So c’mon, dipshit, answer the standard question we ask trolls: what part of “Misogyny. I mock it” do you not understand?

Or is this just a desperate bid for attention and votes as the most pathetic waste of oxygen around?

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Dingleberry: quit your bitching about “highbrow.” What exactly are you expecting on this blog?

Your dogged insistence to shape this place the way you want it regardless of others is a large part of why people don’t like you around here. Are you this humorless and annoying offline?

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

@ hellkell – be fair, “humorless and annoying” are about the only traits he has in common with the real Diogenes the Cynic.

pecunium
11 years ago

Jo: Can a religious belief be misogynistic? Yes. The question is, as with so many things, complex; and context dependent.

The second question would be whether his fear is actually irrational. If his fear is that women would steal his sperm, he may have a point. If I remember correctly the CDC lifetime numbers were 1 in 21 for forced to penetrate.

This is a foolish conflation. It implies that the purpose of those rapes is to get pregnant. The evidence shows this to be not the case.

Let’s assume a 4% lifetime victimization rate for sperm theft due to rape.

Let’s see some numbers as opposed to a conveniently structured pretense.

If a man has on average 1,000 social interactions with women where she might acquire his sperm surreptitiously,

Really?

Are we talking a single dude, or one with a partner† If a person is in a relationship and has sex every third day, on average, that’s 122 sexual events per year. So it’s eight years to get to your magic number.

Apparently, however, the average is lower than that, with most men having sex about 6 times per month from the ages of 25 – 45.

That’s about 72 times per year, which = almost 14 years to attain the magic 1,000 mark, which fails to address how many of them include the chance for her to, “acquire his sperm surreptitiously. If I’m generous and say that one in ten of those encounters allows for it… then he’s going to need 140 years to reach the level of risk you are assuming.

if he intends to avoid every social interaction, he avoids a realistic threat to the theft of his sperm. Is his fear irrational? If his fear is only that she would steal his sperm from used condoms and / or that she would trick him by falsely claiming birth control use, would that be misogynistic? Just because he doesn’t recognize rape as a potential threat to the theft of his sperm doesn’t mean that it isn’t a threat. If he is factually correct (over a lifetime), but his reasoning is flawed, would that still be misogynistic?

There is a world of power in that, if. If he is factually correct then misogyny isn’t necessarily presumptive (though as I said with regard to religion, context will make the difference). You have yet, however, to show any level of factually correct in this assumption.

†This is an important difference. One has to assume that a person in a relationship has a lower risk of sperm-jacking, if only because most people are reasonable, and will talk out interest in children: those who aren’t sympatico will, more often than not, choose to sever the relationship, and find someone who also has an interest in children

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

Don’t you love the way John calls sex “social interaction”? Funny, when I think of social interaction I think of things like talking, sharing meals, working together, going to movies, going for walks … what I don’t think of is sex. It’s almost like John doesn’t think that men and women do all that talking sort of stuff together. Or that women are human people rather than some sort of Perm Burgling Sex Aliens.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Perm Burgling Sex Aliens is the name of my band.

Argenti Aertheri
11 years ago

Lauralot, the bone hive pic is this. It’s a real disease, The reality of it is terrifying.

The amusement park seems over the top, whereas the flesh that hates is just… *shudder*

katz
11 years ago

Funny, when I think of social interaction I think of things like talking, sharing meals, working together, going to movies, going for walks … what I don’t think of is sex.

But if a woman doesn’t offer you sex after that, it violates the law of equal exchange!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
11 years ago

And if she does, it makes her a wh*re!

John Anderson
John Anderson
11 years ago

@The Kitteh’s Unpaid Help

“Oh, not “financial abortion” again. That wasn’t about men who’d been raped (and I too don’t think they should bear responsibility)”

I don’t categorize it as such merely pointing out that many MRAs would settle for that over forced abortions. I agree with the “financial abortion” position, but based on the principle that women essentially have access to unilateral adoption. I an aware of no jurisdiction that requires a father’s approval to terminate parental rights and responsibilities. Best case is that a father has a specific time frame in which to challenge an adoption.

Id agree that there should be no unilateral adoptions for men (financial abortion) if women were required to pay child support to adoptive parents in cases where the biological father has not consented to the adoption. Most feminists would disagree, but that just exposes the fact that they don’t believe that child support is actually for the benefit of the child. Otherwise why opposition to making women pay it? It benefits the child after all and if she wants to avoid it, get the father to consent.

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