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$MONEY$ cock blockade dozens of upvotes evil women evo psych fairy tales I'm totally being sarcastic men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA oppressed men paranoia playing the victim precious bodily fluids reddit spermjacking

Men’s Rights Redditor warns men: “Be careful with your sperm. Your very freedom is at stake.”

Men: Protect your Purity of Essence
Men: Protect your Purity of Essence

It’s official: Men’s Rights Activists are more obsessed with their “precious bodily fluids” than Dr. Strangelove’s General Jack D. Ripper. Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, many of the regulars are celebrating Boxing Day by sitting around on their computers worrying about evil predatory succubi burgling their sperm. Check out this little post, which has gotten 90 upvotes so far:

MRspermworth92k

Yes, he really did just say “It’s as if your penis shoots magic IOUs every time you ejaculate.” If this is true, a lot of guys owe millions if not billions of dollars to a lot of old socks.

In the comments, other Men’s Rightsers shared their deepest concerns about the specter of spermburgling. SuicideBanana warns that the enemy may already be in your bed:

MRspermBoogywoman

Reconstrucht worries about the money-hungry sperm-hunters lurking in bars:

MRspermPredatory

And one future veterinarian contemplates giving up dating, in order to protect himself from the hypothetical women — sorry, soul sucking succubi — who might hypothetically use his future sperm in order to cash in big on his future vet money. Ca-ching!

MRspermSuccubus

Gentlemen: To fully protect your Essence, I suggest you ejaculate directly into a paper shredder, douse the results with hot sauce and arsenic, and pour the entire concoction into the nearest garbage disposal. Then flee the country.

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Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

Oh, fuck. I thought that the “1,000 social interactions with women where she might acquire his sperm surreptitiously” would be the biggest laugh I’d have today.

Dingleberry, just topped it.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Dingleberry the Frothy thinks he can make rules now. Well, he can all he wants, but no one here’s going to listen to him.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Bee

Are you aware of how ignorant you sound right now?

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Are you aware of how ignorant you sound right now?

Pot, I’d like you to meet Kettle. Kettle, this is Pot.

cloudiah
11 years ago

Dingleberry, are you aware of how frothy you sound right now?

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

hellkell

Yet another non-contributing post in your history of not contributing.

Let the grown-ups talk.

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

Dance, monkey!

Bee
Bee
11 years ago

Just pretending for a moment that Diogenes is making sense:

Dude, you’re not arguing against atheism. Apparently, you’re arguing against a position of any belief that’s not based in the Bible. Completely different.

Also: No. Please tell me. I can’t wait to hear what someone like you has to say about how I sound.

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

Let the grown-ups talk.

You know any?

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

The grown ups are talking, Dingleberry, but you insist on interrupting. Learn some manners around your betters.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Dingleberry the Frothing: you never did explain the standards by which you’re judging contributions.

thebewilderness
11 years ago

Certainly a joke. Not a bad one either.

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

No, no. Everybody else has to go first.

John Anderson
John Anderson
11 years ago

@ hellkell

“Fail again. The above certainly can deny a woman an abortion in terms of timing. ”

So can abortion restrictions in the third trimester. There was a case in England where a woman was convicted of inducing an abortion in the lasr week of pregnancy. Many people thought that she killed the baby after a live birth, but they couldn’t find the body and convicted her on what she admitted to.

I suppose the callous answer would be make a faster devision, but not necessary. Just a question, how is this different from denying men access to a birth control pill if he believes that the side effects are worth the risk?

Restricting an abortion is not much different than denying men effective contraception. I’m assuming that a pill that would make 10% of it’s users sterile is effective at preventing pregnancy.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

So, unless you can articulate circumstances that would make you change your mind, I’ll assume your reasons for being an atheist are emotional, and not logical.

Hey fuckwit, what makes you equate referring to the Bible as myth with being an atheist? FAIL.

And you don’t come barging in here prating about how to conduct a debate. You’ve never added anything of substance or intentional humour to any threads here.

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

Gee, totally intellectual response.

Yup, just what I expected.

thebewilderness
11 years ago

Manboobz! Where the trolls are so effing stupid they think they set the rules of engagement.

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

DtF is so very full of fail.

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

Gee, is it? Gosh gee whiz!

Diogenes The Cynic
Diogenes The Cynic
11 years ago

thebewilder

Yeah. The trolls here are stupid.

katz
11 years ago

Diogenes, how’s the Voynich Manuscript going?

hellkell
hellkell
11 years ago

Chew toy thinks he’s not a troll, how adorbs of him.

katz
11 years ago

Do you guys know how embarrassing it is hearing Diogenes talk about the Bible? It’s like when some obnoxious teenybopper type starts talking about how much they like your favorite band.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Dingleberry doesn’t set the bar high for much, but when it comes to fail, oh boy.

Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III
11 years ago

@ katz – Don’t you know intellectual effort is for stupid people! Only things you can figure out instantly and without research are intellectually honest!

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