It’s official: Men’s Rights Activists are more obsessed with their “precious bodily fluids” than Dr. Strangelove’s General Jack D. Ripper. Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, many of the regulars are celebrating Boxing Day by sitting around on their computers worrying about evil predatory succubi burgling their sperm. Check out this little post, which has gotten 90 upvotes so far:
Yes, he really did just say “It’s as if your penis shoots magic IOUs every time you ejaculate.” If this is true, a lot of guys owe millions if not billions of dollars to a lot of old socks.
In the comments, other Men’s Rightsers shared their deepest concerns about the specter of spermburgling. SuicideBanana warns that the enemy may already be in your bed:
Reconstrucht worries about the money-hungry sperm-hunters lurking in bars:
And one future veterinarian contemplates giving up dating, in order to protect himself from the hypothetical women — sorry, soul sucking succubi — who might hypothetically use his future sperm in order to cash in big on his future vet money. Ca-ching!
Gentlemen: To fully protect your Essence, I suggest you ejaculate directly into a paper shredder, douse the results with hot sauce and arsenic, and pour the entire concoction into the nearest garbage disposal. Then flee the country.
@ Jessica
“woman has a 1 in 6 chance of being raped in her life.
a man has a 1 in a million chance of being sperm burgled.
ha ha though. the false equivalence was funny.”
The CDC in the 2010 NISVS estimated that 1,267,000 men were forced to penetrate someone else and that 79% of their rapists were women. So about 1,000,000 men were raped by women. So are you saying that when a man is raped his body has a way of shutting down that whole sperm producing thing or are you saying that a woman can’t get pregnant from sperm acquired when raping a man or maybe you’re just supporting rape culture and you’re saying that an erection = consent.
He’s lecturing feminists about the importance of choice….jesus christ.
Also, once again, mansplaining with a side order of co-opting our issues as their own.
Mr Anderson: As an MRA I can tell you that your suspicious are unfounded. Feminists should realize that it’s better to have a choice than not. Why would you think MRAs would rather not have the choice? Feminists do have a hard time recognizing that men are people too.”
Ah, bullshit. I saw most of that interview video and did some additional looking into it. What dumbfuck goes to women with a men’s contraceptive pill? Oh, yeah, this guy. Betty’s ugly? Who gives two shits – that has nothing to do with the science behind the pill. And that pill was sterilizing men _ now, I’m a woman, so I guess I don’t really give a shit but it seems to me to be smarter to just get a vasectomy if you want to be sterile rather than take a stupid pill with side effects. Stop blaming feminists and women for your own lack of action. Men having their own pill is their own business, not women’s. No woman in her right mind is going to stop taking / using contraceptives just because a man is if she really doesn’t want to be pregnant. And any fool can see that three forms of b/c (hers, his and theirs – condoms should be worn to prevent spread of disease, remember?) is better than two. Gee whiz, committed couples might even be able to stop using condoms altogether, unless one has a disease they don’t wish to infect the other with. Gods, wouldn’t that have been nice before I had my tubal ligation! Especially since my husband absolutely refused to use the damned condoms as they are supposed to be and risked getting me pregnant, in spite of the fact that he is the one who said we couldn’t have another child for financial reasons and I refused to use contraceptive pills because they were making me sick! In short, passive agressive behavior which, if I had gotten pregnant, would have – yet again – been my fucking fault..all cuz I didn’t like being nauseous. Bad wifey! Fuck you, Mr. Anderson.
Says the idiot from a movement designed to deny the basic humanity of women. Get fucked.
Duh obviously fiction is not reality; fiction is BETTER than reality…
“I just figured out why Abnoy wants gender-separated planets!”
I totally thought that said gender-segregated plants. Female tulips are misandry?
Also, +548762345876 internets for Hellkell, for the last few days of telling people to fuck off.
Imagine Daffy Duck saying “soul sucking succubus”. 😀
It’th Thoul Thucking Thuccubus theathon!
That should probably have said “thuccubuth”.
foul fucking fuccUbus
How about in Latin? Roughly – comedenti animarum succubus
Except that we have had MRAs, in this very space, tell us that the lack of a male birth control pill is the direct result of feminist conspiracy.
Think fast: Which happens more frequently? Women fishing used condoms out of the trash in order to trap hapless men or men who beg, cajole, coerce, and outright lie in attempt to keep from using condoms? Which PUA asshole was that who used to troll here and call it “bareback persistence”?
I don’t remember a troll here doing it, but isn’t that a phrase Roissy or RooshV use? They were saying to rape someone rather than agree to use a condom.
okay…ew…used condoms and turkey basters are oh tho thexthy….
Which — to circle back to Anderson — tells me they aren’t at all worried about the possibility of having to pay child support.
A good point. These are the same guys who talk about using “safe houses” (ie. not their own homes) and hiding their identity to make sure the women they bully into sex can’t track them down later. Horrible, horrible creatures. Though I daresay they’re not the same men as the ones panicking about nonexistent spermburglars in the OP.
Someone should catalog which MRA asshat says which terrible thing. We need a search engine! “Penguin Whores” “Did you mean Tom Martin?”
Jo: And what of a woman who refrains from sex with all men do to an irrational fear? This is what I’m asking.
No. It isn’t. You said, “in a relationship”.
Even if I grant your new arguendo there is a difference. The nature of the irrational fear. You have to provide one. The irrational fear here is that some greedy woman will, “steal his sperm, so she can get rich”.
The second difference is that he is saying this fear is so rational other men ought to do the same.
What about celibacy on the basis of a belief? What is religion, but what someone believes? His “irrational fear” is what he believes to be true.
Dude, you are reaching. There are any number of philosophical beliefs which argue for some form of sexual restraint. All of them ascribe it to a personal desire to attain some form of higher understanding of the numinous (e.g. Taoism’s belief that ejaculation diminishes one’s life force).
That is in no way comparable to, “Some succubus is going to fuck me so she can get rich”.
Women are not entitled to have sex with him and he shouldn’t be virgin shamed for the choice that he made.
Who said women had a right to have sex with him? Who said women have a right to a relationship?
Who is virgin shaming him?
We are saying his reasons are frivolous, and that his exhortation is stupid. Arguing that all beliefs are rational; which is the core of the argument you are now making, is pigheaded. Not all beliefs are reasonable.
If he were to make other decisions concerning women that actually negatively impacted a woman’s right to something then I’d say he was misogynistic.
He is saying are 1: greedy to the point of stupidity, and 2: that such a level of greed is so prevalent that all men need to be so much on their guard about it that they treal all women as sperm-burgling predators.
That’s misogyny; even if it never harms a single woman.
@ Shiraz
“He’s lecturing feminists about the importance of choice….jesus christ.”
And of course when men have a realistic choice not to have children, it effects a woman’s choice to have children and we know that’s the root of feminism, choice for women.
“Also, once again, mansplaining with a side order of co-opting our issues as their own.”
Because you know women getting raped isn’t an issue for men and men getting raped isn’t an issue at all and people are surprised that the young don’t identify as feminists.
@ Tina
“And that pill was sterilizing men _ now, I’m a woman, so I guess I don’t really give a shit but it seems to me to be smarter to just get a vasectomy”
I don’t think it was sterilizing all men. I think 10% was the number mentioned. That’s high and I’d understand if the government wanted to keep it off the market, but cigarettes are legal. The decision I would make would be a vasectomy and / or condoms although a vasectomy can result in sterilization and it’s my understanding that at some point it can’t be reversed so will eventually result in sterilization. Each man should be able to make his own decisions involving risk.
“No woman in her right mind is going to stop taking / using contraceptives just because a man is if she really doesn’t want to be pregnant.”
But yet for some reason you think a man would. It just goes to prove that feminists don’t think men are people.
That papershredder-thing seems excessively complicated and difficult.
MRAs, the answer to your problems is clear, simple, and to the point:
Eat it. If you ejaculate, scrape it all up and eat that shit. Slurp it all down, turn those used condoms inside-out, don’t leave one precious drop for those semen-hungry succubi to find! Those are YOUR sacred fluids, they must not ever leave your sight!
Do this and i guarantee you will not have any problems with women who seek your holy-juice.
@JohnAnderson:
You already have a realistic choice not to have children. You can use a condom. You can have a vasectomy. Those may not be ideal, but to say that men have no choice in whether or not to reproduce is insane. And no legislature is trying to legally limit men’s control over their bodies — is it? Unlike women’s.
As to women’s choice to have children — there are already sperm banks. I would think, being unable to have children without a willing partner is more of a problem for men than being unable to NOT have children. But as I said, none of these issues that MRA’s blabber about are genuine — all this is manufactured in an effort to undermine women.
John, no one here has ever claimed any such thing. If you think otherwise, go ahead, find the quote. I’ll wait.
Are the straw feminists in your head acting up again? You should probably go take a nap until they quiet down.
Give it up Mis ter An der son. Nobody falls for that transparent bullshit any more.
@ Nobinayamu
“Except that we have had MRAs, in this very space, tell us that the lack of a male birth control pill is the direct result of feminist conspiracy.”
I’m not saying that. I’m just pointing out the absurdity of statements implying that MRAs don’t want a pill, they want to blame feminists for not having one. I think most MRAs would want a male pill. I would. While their waiting they take the opportunity to blame feminists for it’s lack of existence.
I remember the feminist backlash when viagra was introduced. Some suggested that those efforts could have been better put to use curing cancer (I’m assuming breast cancer), others wondered why they didn’t create a pill for women, and others ridiculed it for solving a non-problem (in their minds).
Although I’ve heard the arguments that this industry or that industry makes so much money that they don’t really want to find a cure or fix for the problem their fighting, sometimes it’s the limitations of science and biology that dictate what can and can’t be done. It’s probably more comforting to believe an outside force is preventing you from getting what you need. If it were your own biology, you would possibly never get it.
Give it some time and see what gets developed. I do wonder though. What if a pill with 10% chance of sterility were the best we could ever hope for. Would feminists support giving men the option to take that pill or would they support a ban?