A quick one question quiz, which all regular readers of Man Boobz should be able to ace.
Question: Over on The Spearhead, commenters have been offering their opinions about the Newtown school shootings. All but one of the following quotes have been taken word for word from the Spearhead, and reflect who or what the quoted commenter blames for the shooting. Can you identify which statement is NOT from a Spearheader?
A) “Guns don’t kill, the culture kills. A culture of out of control children. A culture of child neglect and abuse brought about and driven largely by the feminist philosophy of the fulfillment of women comes before ALL else, including their children, born or unborn. It wasn’t a hard sell because women already have a dark and selfish nature.”
B) “[A] sick person who may have been turned into monster with the help of a selfish and thoughtless woman.”
C) “I wonder to what extent did the shooter’s mom and female teachers have in motivating his actions? what if the shooter is the victim? what if more and more evidence (or strong implications) of the women using their authority as mom and teachers to manipulate a mentally unstable young man keeps coming out? … Of course it’s not actually paranoia if ‘they’ really are out to get you, is it?. And ‘they’ being a feminist police state, well, they really are out to get me!”
D) “Munchausen syndrome by proxy. Actually, in many ways, feminism is Munchausen syndrome by proxy.”
E) “The problem is women running things. Even after all the massacres, the dearies continue to insist the solution is to disarm all the law abiding citizens.”
F) “A Feminized Culture.”
G) “Lifelong sworn conspirators, murder incorporated, organized feminism, the police and judges, the deadly sneak parroting puppet gangsters, using all the gangster deadly Frankenstein-feminist controls—these hand and rope sneak deadly feminazi-gangsters, the judges and the police, trick, trap, rob, wreck, butcher and murder the people to keep them terrorized in in gangster Frankenstein earphone radio slavery from the Communist-feminazi-gangster government and con artists parroting puppet gangster feminist scum.”
BONUS QUESTION: Did anyone on The Spearhead blame the actual killer? Y/N
.
.
.
ANSWER: A through F are all from The Spearhead. G is the ringer, from a rant by famous paranoid ranter Francis E. Dec, Esq, with the words “feminism” and “feminazi” worked into it here and there to make it sound a little more Spearheadish.
BONUS ANSWER: Surprisingly, yes. This guy.
*gasp!*
CLOUDIAH!!!
Everyone knows that Canadian maple syrup is superior to anything else in the world.
You will now have to deal with hosers who will force you to where a lumber jack shirt and a toque and sing the Canadian national anthem iN FRENCH before all your family members…
Pillowinhell, are you sentencing Cloudiah to be a Jumping Frenchman of Maine?
I can set you up with the good stuff (locall produced from a farm) for about ten bucks. What grade would you like?
Ten bucks for how much? I’m genuinely trying to figure out how much it costs in North America, it can’t be as expensive as the UK everywhere, or it wouldn’t be so popular, right?
Ten bucks will get you a litre here. Seeing as maple syrup is so strongly tied to our cultural identity and food, it would be popular no matter what.
Still, lots of Canadians buy aunt jemimiah, which is piss poor by comparison. But it also costs three bucks a litre.
I’ll sentence cloudiah to that ONLY if I can ensure she sings the Canadian anthem in French every time her name is called.
Things could get a little hot for you in the library Cloudiah…
*Moves to Canada* *bathes in maple syrup*
Nat, when you get here I’ll make sure there’s a clawfoot tub full of proper, glorious Canadian maple syrup for you to bath in and handsome French men to attend to your every whim.
Aunt Jemima is maple-flavored corn syrup. It is an abomination in the Old Testament sense. My sister prefers it to the real stuff and it is one of her few weirdly food habits that I do nit find strangely, uniquely cute.
Note to self: when traveling bring TP, maple syrup and cranberry sauce.
The things you can’t buy in other areas of the world!
*not
[takes deep breath]
O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True feminazi love in all thy womyn command.
With glowing boxcutters we see thee rise,
The Maple Syrup strong and free!
From far and wide,
O Canada, HAILSATAN KILL ALL MEN our battle cry.
Shulamith Firestone, keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
*Fedexes Cloudiah one (1) internet*
Good idea Pillowinhell, I’ll need someone to practice my misandries on while I’m there.
We’ve lost kitteh. 🙁 I guess the world ended early over there.
If it’s 1.30am FantasticTime it’s 10.30am Kittehtime, she must be doing that whole work thing. Or raptured.
I have no idea if this is correct, but pillowinhell wanted it in French:
O Canada!
Notre maison et sa terre natale!
Le véritable amour féminazi dans tous tes womyn commande.
Avec cutters bras sait porter l’épée,
Le sirop d’érable fort et libre!
De loin,
Ô Canada, HAILSATAN tuer tous les hommes de notre cri de bataille.
Shulamith Firestone, protéger nos foyers et gratuit!
Ô Canada, nous sommes sur nos gardes pour toi.
Ô Canada, nous sommes sur nos gardes pour toi
Speaking of time and work, I should go to bed soon. New job tutoring tomorrow*, I need to be tip-toppers. Although this bottle of wine does need finishing…
(*A feminist! Educating a man!)
*stands proudly at attention with jackboots on some passerby males neck*
Cloudiah, the Canadian Maple Syrup Cartel salutes you!
*raises maple syrup lollies proudly *
Kitteh seems to have been enraptured in the midst of typing a word! Kitteh, can you talk to us from the other side? Come back, tell us what the end of the world was like.
Never fear! Due to the timezone thing, Kitteh is safely inside the TARDIS and will greet us when we awake on the 22nd.
The Doctor will save us. just as he already did Kitteh.
*translation attempt using GCSE French and not looking at the original*
Oh Canada! Our house of natural earth! Our true armour to the feminazis and in the command of the womyn. With swords(?) of brass and our epees (sorry can’t be arsed with accents on a Mac), our something something fort and freedom! OUR LOINS. Oh Canada, HAIL SATAN and kill all our men in battle. Shulamith Firestone, your children are free. Oh Canada, we’ll totally do wars for you. Oh Canada, we’ll totally do wars for you.
*bows*
(I can translate ingredients lists to see if they’re vegan or not, those are clearly my limits)
Take it from this old-fashioned cat.
Beloved grew up in Montreal. I think he’s going to get a giggle out of the French translation….
BRAINS
BRAINS
i has returned as zombie kitteh
Freitag do you have it in your power to make sure this year’s Christmas episode doesn’t suck big misogyny balls? It’s the only episode I get to watch with TinyFantastic and I don’t want to have to hold in rolling my eyes again, my optometrist advised against it.