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Kate Harding Tells Men’s Rights Activists to Go Eff Themselves

middlefingercandles

You all need to go read Kate Harding’s bracing (and given all the recent doxxing bullshit, spectacularly well-timed) Jezebel piece titled “Fuck You, Men’s Rights Activists.” Here’s a sample:

Fuck you, first of all, for making it nearly impossible for decent men struggling with abusive partners or unfair custody arrangements to get the help they need and deserve. You have forever tainted those issues with your rage-filled, obsessively anti-woman horseshit, to the point where it’s become difficult for any rational, compassionate person to trust a man who claims he’s been screwed over in family court or abused by a female partner, even if he has. …

Fuck you for showing up every time women speak, especially about rape and abuse, and trying to make it all about you. Fuck you for derailing threads about the victims of Marc Lépine, a man who screamed about his hatred for feminists as he murdered fourteen women and injured many others, because you also hate feminists and want a fucking cookie for not killing anyone. Fuck you for making rape and death threats against young women who dared to protest a speaking engagement by a man who thinks little girls would enjoy being raped by their fathers if it weren’t for society telling them it’s dirty. Fuck you for whining about how unfair it is that women might wonder if you’re a rapist when you approach them out of nowhere, while completely ignoring how unfair it is that women feel the need to be on guard all the time in public. Or that if we relax and behave normally—drinking, dancing, dressing however we want—you will be the first motherfuckers in line to blame us for getting ourselves raped.

And it keeps going from there.

Thank you Kate, for putting it so well.

 

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blitzgal
8 years ago

Ooh, this one is so much better than the “fuck you, other people’s children” one they ran earlier. Thanks for the link.

sidhe3141
8 years ago

Are those candles… scented?

Karalora
Karalora
8 years ago

Kate Harding is a magnificent human being. I learned from her to stop hating my body, to treat it right and let my health take care of itself rather than tying assumptions about health to an increasingly arbitrary number on the bathroom scale.

This article just proves that she supplies 100% of your FDA-recommended levels of Vitamin Win.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
8 years ago

Hoorah!

I’m particularly glad she started where she did, actually – I do wonder if that’s one of the more damaging things the MRM does. I’m not comparing with the doxxing and suchlike – that’s clearly horrible – but I kinda feel like the main effect of their (frankly rather small, though quite visible) hateful circlejerking could be to get the issues they talk about dismissed, as opposed to anything it gets people who agree with them to do.

Having typed that out, I’m inclining away from the idea again because I don’t want to erase any abuse that does result from what they do.

Uncertain MC is uncertain.

blitzgal
8 years ago

The number of people in the comments who disbelieve that the Farrell harassment brigade could possibly be a real thing in the world is mind-boggling. Hello, welcome to the planet. This is what happens to women who speak up, appear in public, exist as women.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

I couldn’t read the comments on that article. Can’t take that level of dumb today.

blitzgal
8 years ago

I wanted to see what the trolls were saying. They are starting to make their way to the thread. For awhile it was mostly people posting gifs to celebrate the shitstorm that was about to happen.

inurashii
inurashii
8 years ago

hellkell, MOST of the comments are okay, and the bad ones generally have people being like “Uh fuck you, thanks”

That said, I totally fed a troll.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
8 years ago

… Thinking slightly more, did I just do a steaming pile of manbias?

argh

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

The article was great. Only read a few of the comments and they seemed generally from clueless men who have no idea what scum Elam &co are or what the MRM is really about.

howardbann1ster
8 years ago

@Morka–it might not be one of the biggest problems with them, but it’s one of the biggest hypocrisies with them–they say they’re for men, and they hurt men, full stop.

Their shit is bad enough, but it directly undermines their stated goals.

But, yeah, if we focused purely on that it’s sorta missing the point about their overall effect on women, which is hella worse.

So…. yeah, we should mention it, like Kate did, but definitely not dwell there, because there’s bigger fish to fry.

Lilith T. Bell (@bonbonsnbodices)

That was glorious and spot on. I was glad to see her point out the way the MRAs have appropriated genuine problems that–surprise surprise–FEMINISTS have been working on, because gender equality means breaking down all of those damaging gender-based barriers.

I’m not generally a fan of Jezebel, but this was fantastic.

Falconer
8 years ago

Are those candles… scented?

Curse my metal body, I wasn’t fast enough!

BlackBloc (@XBlackBlocX)

MRA central in comments. Surprise? None.

“What about the moderate MRAs?” When you show me one I’ll tell you.

sidestinkappleeye
8 years ago

the candles have to be scented. Justice would have it no other way.

Jayem Griffin
8 years ago

Oh ye gods, Kate Harding is back, and just as awesome as ever. That was a ridiculously cathartic read.

blitzgal
8 years ago

“What about the moderate MRAs?” When you show me one I’ll tell you.

Yeah, I especially liked the guy who started his comment by saying that he follows several “Red Pill” blogs, and then goes on to say that Harding unfairly mischaracterizes the majority of MRAs, they don’t hate women at all, blah blah blah.

Dood, you use the term red pill. Do you not see what that’s an issue right there?

blitzgal
8 years ago

Too afraid to follow Cloudiah’s link.

cloudiah
8 years ago

There are worse discussions going on on r/mr today, actually.

A discussion on why there aren’t more homeless women starts with a “joke” about sexual exploitation, and contains this gem:

Because if there was a cute girl walking along the streets on her own, a guy would pick her up and take care of her. That’s how my friend got his gf, she was homeless and he was gfless. Now they are together for 3 years.

drst
drst
8 years ago

My only response at the moment is “God damn I miss Shapely Prose.”

(I get why it was closed and I respect it, but, well, damn.)

timetravellingfool
8 years ago

Oh, you should read the responses to those comments- for every mra whine there are ten jezebel readers just annihilating them. Does the heart good.

Falconer
8 years ago

@cloudiah: I read that quote and thought of Cliff. Exploiting desperation to get laid — how horrible can you get?

Freitag
Freitag
8 years ago

@blitzgal, they are just whinging and complaining over there. Not scary, just head-shaking. They really do not get it. And I think some of them might actually be the elusive moderate MRAs.

This is the tragedy of the MRM. They find some men who might actually have it in them to be good and decent men, then play on their frustrations to turn them into sad, lonely, and very angry, MRAs. Awhile back there was a thread on young men who would just like to cuddle and have a nice relationship with a girl, and the MRM will never let this happen. Instead, these guys will become more bitter as they continue to alienate, and become alienated from, the women they might have been happy with.

inurashii
inurashii
8 years ago

ugh, I actually went through r/mr to try to prove one of my points to some dipshit who isn’t even going to listen.

I think I need a break. 🙁

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Kate Harding is spot on as usual (I also miss Shapely Prose) — I’m staying out of those comments though, I haven’t had coffee yet and it is thus too early for that level of stupid.

(Hi Freitag! I missed that old fashioned cat of yours!)

inurashii — let me offer you some nice soothing clown loaches for your break —

http://youtu.be/WckVL5NGLQU

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

Are those candles… scented?

Scented Fuck You candles?

justeunperdant
8 years ago

Oh my god some women hate me because I am an MRM and MGTOW. How can I live with my self. My self esteem is destroyed and I am a shame to be a man. We need more women like her to put men like me in his place. Now I will go down in my basement and whip my self because a women told me to fuck off.

inurashii
inurashii
8 years ago

I need to save me from myself.

In the meantime, here’s a cat walking funny because of a balloon.
http://youtu.be/vGV1PYM4i70

cloudiah
8 years ago

They are so delusional they are convincing themselves that Harding’s piece was an attempt to open negotiations with MRAs.

Here’s my take. Feminist partisans like Jezebel are losing influence with the rank-and-file, and the feminist peacemakers are on the rise (the feminists who want to make peace with MRAs but were completely ignored up to this point). The partisans are appealing to the rank-and-file, who are starting to sympathize with us, and asking for continued power. That would explain why the opening move was to give a list of legitimate men’s issues. Because the rank-and-file are starting to believe that we do have legitimate men’s issues.

The feminist rank-and-file will continue to shift their allegiance from the partisans to the peacemakers, but only as long as the MRA partisans (like avfm) continue their unrelenting attack on the feminist partisans (with the outing of the UofT students being the most recent compelling example).

Seriously, you can’t make this shit up.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

BWAHAHAHAHA who does this fuckwit think has been talking about genuine men’s issues for decades? Feminists, those awful extremists, that’s who!

These guys are the Marianas Trench of stupidity and self-delusion.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Well, that’s certainly a unique way to interpret a “fuck you” in response to a specific event. It means they want us to do more of the thing that caused them to tell us to fuck off! Isn’t it obvious?

PS – I’m fairly sure that Kate Harding does not in fact want to be friends with the MRM.

cloudiah
8 years ago

She was just negging them.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

That would explain why the opening move was to give a list of legitimate men’s issues. Because the rank-and-file are starting to believe that we do have legitimate men’s issues.

MRAs simply do not understand feminists on even the most basic level. We already know there are men’s issues; the protestors were not protesting against men’s issues in Toronto. We are against their misogyny and their abuse apologia, and they simply don’t get why we would object to either.

freitag235
freitag235
8 years ago

The feminist rank-and-file will continue to shift their allegiance from the partisans to the peacemakers, but only as long as the MRA partisans (like avfm) continue their unrelenting attack on the feminist partisans (with the outing of the UofT students being the most recent compelling example).

Oh, yes. Because doing stupid shit like that will make teh wimmminz love you so much. Yes, gents, keep doing what you’re doing, and then the feminists will become your allies.

I wonder if it hurts, being that stupid.

titianblue
titianblue
8 years ago

I look forwards excitedly (spoiler: not really) to MRAs explaining how to tell whether a feminist is partisan, peacemaker or merely rank-and-file ….

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

“MRAs simply do not understand feminists anything on even the most basic level.”

FTFY

gelar
gelar
8 years ago

That would explain why the opening move was to give a list of legitimate men’s issues. Because the rank-and-file are starting to believe that we do have legitimate men’s issues.

I keep thinking that a specific combination of words will manage to unlock the revelation that, “Hey, feminists and I have long disapproved of some of the same things, and want to change them!”

Nope.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
8 years ago

I look forwards excitedly (spoiler: not really) to MRAs explaining how to tell whether a feminist is partisan, peacemaker or merely rank-and-file ….

Well obviously us male feminists are only in it to pick up Teh Wimminz, so we’ll be on the more extreme end to avoid looking too entitled.

Howard: I think that’s a good way to think about it, thanks.

katz
8 years ago

Where are they getting the idea that the best way to get people to compromise with you is to be an unrelenting dick? Is it from the Senate?

whataboutthemoonz
8 years ago

Every once in a while, I get this really bizarre idea that if I just tried hard enough, I would get through to some MRAs.

I don’t think it would work though 🙁

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

@whataboutthemoonz – that’s an awful lot of solid skull to drill through. I dont’ think it’d be worth the effort.

Myoo
Myoo
8 years ago

@titanblue

I look forwards excitedly (spoiler: not really) to MRAs explaining how to tell whether a feminist is partisan, peacemaker or merely rank-and-file ….

It’s tattooed on the back of their necks.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

It’s tattooed on the back of their necks.

I thought it was tattooed on our lips, and that’s why we have to grow the Stalin moustaches … ?

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

That dude’s rationalization hamster is working overtime. He may have come out with the dumbest thing ever said by an MRA, and there’s some stiff competition for that dubious honor.

cloudiah
8 years ago

that’s an awful lot of solid skull to drill through.

FEMINSITS ARE PLANNING TO DRILL THROUGH OUR SKULLS! SUMMON A VOICE FOR MEN! CODE RED! CODE RED!!!!!!!!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

And my power drill’s batteries are flat, so I’m gonna use a BIT AND BRACE.

::laughs evilly::

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
8 years ago

“Making peace?” “Unrelenting attack”?

They really think of themselves as lil` Internet warriors. Haha

timetravellingfool
8 years ago

Yes, make peace with the (and I use this word loosely) organization whose driving motivation is antithetical to absolutely everything you stand for. But I guess it sort of makes sense in a way. In MRA-speak, ‘fuck you’ is code for ‘let’s be friends’!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

They probably hear it as “I WANT TO fuck you.”

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