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Canada: Land of Danger for Men and Boys?

feministbear
Canadian feminist trying to eat a man’s butt

I’ve seen some strange and paranoid comments on Men’s Rights hate site A Voice for Men, but this recent comment may be the strangest and paranoidest I’ve ever seen. In the comments to a post outing one of the protesters at the Warren Farrell talk at the University of Toronto, a commenter called Redfield is worried that Canada has now become some sort of death trap for men. Because of all the feminism.

AVFMredfield

That’s right: Because a couple of feminist college students in Toronto made jokey remarks on Twitter about killing all men, this man is afraid that his 18-year-old son will be in actual physical danger from evil feminists if he sets foot in Canada.

In a later comment, he reports that he and his sons will be going to Canada after all:

AVFMredfield2

But he wonders if there are any “travel advisories” that can, I guess, warn him where feminists tend to congregate:

AVFMredfield3

In the comments here at Man Boobz, Cloudiah imagines how his conversation with the consulate staffer might have gone:

Mid-day at the Consulate General of Canada in Sydney.

 

Pierre: Hello, you’ve reached the Consulate General of Canada. My name is Pierre. How may I help you?

MRA: I am planning a trip to Canada with my sons next year, and I wanted to know what the feminist threat level will be?

Pierre: Excuse me?

MRA: Yellow? Orange? RED???

Pierre: I’m sorry, I don’t understand.

MRA: I need to know what steps I need to take to protect myself and my boys from being killed by feminists. Do we need to get any shots?

Pierre: Did you say ‘feminists?’

MRA: How many men would you estimate are killed by feminists in Canada in January? February? Or do feminists only thaw out in the Spring?

Pierre: You think we freeze feminists?

MRA: I need to make travel plans!

Pierre: Sir, I think you might have been misinformed.

MRA: I assure you that my information is accurate. It cannot be denied that feminists have been engaged in a campaign to kill all men in Canada.

Pierre: Sir, I believe I would have heard about that.

MRA: I SAW A VIDEO! A pack of rabid feminists tore Warren Farrell apart, limb from limb, and feasted on his spleen!

Pierre: Warren who?

MRA: Then an angry mob of feminist zombies attacked John the Otter with flamethrowers. Or maybe one of them had a cigarette lighter, but it was definitely menacing.

Pierre: John the what?

MRA: They might have accidentally singed his sleeve! Or murdered him with fire!

Pierre: Sir, I’m not sure how to say this but… It might be best if you stayed home.

MRA: It’s because they’re SPERMJACKING us now, right? You’re saying that for my own protection. I get you.

Pierre: Um, sure. Right. Please do not come to Canada. Ever.

MRA: THEY’RE POINTING A GUN AT YOUR HEAD RIGHT NOW, AREN’T THEY?

Pierre: [Holds phone in front of his face for a moment. Slowly places it back in the cradle.]

MRA: [Hears dial tone.] Oh my god, they’ve killed him. I must alert A Voice for Men!

I think this is literally how these guys see the world.

This may be why Men’s Rights movement is so much less popular these days (as a search term at least) than one up-and-coming rival for the world’s attention: Smelly discharge. Google Trends doesn’t lie!

GTmrvssmelly

Thanks to Cloudiah for coming up with this as well. She is winning so many internets she may need to move into a bigger place.

To see more things the Men’s Rights movement is less popular than, click here.

NOTE: I am aware that “paranoidest” is not a real word. The correct term is “paranoidallyest.”

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cherabushka
8 years ago

oh fuck they’ve caught on to our super secret Canadian Man Murder Brigade

Jonathan MacGregor
Jonathan MacGregor
8 years ago

Awwww, awaiting moderation. I know what that means so I may as well address you more directly since neither comment will see public eyes.
‘I’m so insecure that every single comment about my articles that gets made must be carefully scrutinized before I allow someone to clutter up my reaffirmation of what I’ve allowed myself to believe.’
You should have more sex.

Natassia
Natassia
8 years ago

There are Timmie’s kiosks in Britain, BUT THEY ARE NOT THE SAME! I was holy disappointed. But you can get some French Vanilla or English toffee coffee mix at the Australia/Canada store in Convent Garden in London.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
8 years ago

I think it a lovely Poe.

Shaenon
8 years ago

A typical Canadian vacation.

I’m just going to post this in every thread from now on.

cloudiah
8 years ago

“Redfield” may be a Poe, but he has definitely commented at AVfM before.

I think I am afraid to ask what a keeper cup is.

gelar
gelar
8 years ago

@Shaenon: Reminds me of camping trips in elementary school.

katz
8 years ago

A keeper cup is a reusable cup you can use instead of a tampon, IIRC.

cloudiah
8 years ago

I think I do not want to know how those could be used as a “greeting.”

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

“super secret Canadian Man Murder Brigade”

Sounds like an awesome band.

Zimmer
Zimmer
8 years ago

It’s really pitiful that MRA’s, like religious fundamentalists, have to invent imaginary monsters to fight against in order to make themselves appear righteous.

As has been pointed out a million times, there are legitimate men’s issues that need addressing. Who is addressing them? Not MRA’s, they would rather play pretend and imagine themselves as heroes fighting against the BIG EVIL FEMINIST DRAGON than do anything remotely useful in the world. You’d think about 5 minutes of actually looking at the facts objectively would reveal this to them, but apparently even that is asking far too much.

Also, long time lurker, first time poster, hello everyone!

cloudiah
8 years ago

thebionicmommy’s posters get their own post.

There are something like 40 more fake MRM posters to go. Blogging about the artistry of feminists is hard work. XD

cloudiah
8 years ago

Hi Zimmer! Did you say BIG EVIL FEMINIST DRAGON?

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Cool stuff! And that’s before we even get to … OTTERS!

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
8 years ago

RAGING OTTER, MISANDROUS DRAGON

this must happen

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
8 years ago

OMG! You guise, psst! They’re on to us!

http://www.standingonguard.com

(It’s kind of old, but it’s still funny)

Little Magpie
Little Magpie
8 years ago

I haven’t even read all the comments. but there is SO MUCH WIN in the comment thread. Also, Arrogant Worms are awesome!

Also, offtopic thread-derailing: Ikea monkey for Mayor! 🙂

Yoyo
Yoyo
8 years ago

How about an oil rig? I hear that you have a few empty in the Gulf of Mexico and its not like there’s many of them. They could get all lubed up and play with each others little soldiers.

Morgan
Morgan
8 years ago

Cloudiah, your imagined dialogue was just all manner of perfect and hilarious and stuff. Thoroughly enjoyed it!

@Bagelsan

Can we send all the MRAs to Alaska, perhaps?

No, I’ve got family up there and don’t want them exposed to the MRA, plus they would likely do something to destroy everything that makes Alaska so gorgeous.

Tracy Bradley
Tracy Bradley
8 years ago

Cloudiah – hilarious!

Because I am so, so proud of my country’s rampant violent misandry, I was moved to make a poster.

http://imgur.com/oXjE8

Also, offtopic thread-derailing: Ikea monkey for Mayor!

We are crossing our fingers! Snappy dresser, that monkey.

Some Gal Not Bored At All
Some Gal Not Bored At All
8 years ago

Awwww, awaiting moderation. I know what that means

No, you don’t. Why do the trolls always pull this one? It is paranoid, faux-truth-telling, transparent macho bullshit – and I just answered my own question, didn’t I.

I’ve lurked for awhile and am echoing calls for the trolls of old. These guys suck.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Tracy – that poster is brilliant! Love the maple leaf with the I Dream of Jeannie eyes. 😀 😀 😀

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

If trollboy had bothered to read the comment policy, he’d know that all first comments go into moderation.

Trollboy, your arglebargle saw the light of day, happy now?

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
8 years ago

I am totally making “moosandry” my word of the month.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Cool strawmen, bro

Trolls are really going downhill around here. This is kind of a hilarious fail — did you post it on the wrong thread?

cloudiah
8 years ago

Tracy that poster is awesome. AWESOME.

Mike Anderson
8 years ago

Let’s count together.

Canada has 54 full-program universities: institutions with at least ~2500 students and a range of Arts/Humanities options.

Of those 53:
– 9 offer some courses in Women’s Studies.
– 3 offer an undergraduate-level certificate or minor.
– 26 offer a full undergraduate program.
– 15 offer a full graduate program.
– 0 (zero, zilch, not a single one) do not offer any Women’s Studies programming at all.

In other words, if your child is too precious to be tainted by a Canadian feminist, too bad. The absolute best you can hope for is an institution where only scattered courses are available, and they make up only 16% of the market.

More importantly, there’s a pattern: the more Women’s Studies a university offers, the more prestigious it tends to be. You find graduate programs at institutions like the University of Toronto, Queen’s University, and McGill, and the various other schools which the children of wealthy dentists queue up to attend.

You want to protect your children from Women’s Studies? Hope you don’t mind sending them to the Royal Military College. But even there, there are DANGEROUS FEMINIST COURSES in the social science and humanities program! Oh NO!

Never mind that this guy is coming from Australia, whose universities are perhaps the most overtly-feminist in the English-speaking world.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Awwww, awaiting moderation. I know what that means so I may as well address you more directly since neither comment will see public eyes.
‘I’m so insecure that every single comment about my articles that gets made must be carefully scrutinized before I allow someone to clutter up my reaffirmation of what I’ve allowed myself to believe.’
You should have more sex.

*sigh* predictable troll is predictable. It means you’re new dude, all new posters go into mod.

And idk about wanting the trolls of old back — Steele had this long rant about how dude was misandry.

katz
8 years ago

Oh, I think there’s some degree of quality in posting an unpunctuated three words and then following it up with a whole paragraph ranting about being sent to moderation.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

It isn’t unpunctuated, he used a comma, in the right place even!

And commas save lives —
Let’s eat Grandma!
Let’s eat, Grandma!

See? Assuming he’s not a hit and run troll, this one does show promise — are there even still regular trolls with NWO and DKM in hiding and Steele, Mr Al, Pell, Br–don et al banned? (Heaven help me, my glossary troll didn’t come back did he?)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

I can’t believe no one has posted this yet.

Shiraz
Shiraz
8 years ago

(whispering) Feminism HQ is located underneath Niagara Falls.
The Maple Leaf in Canada’s flag is misandry because Adam, the first man, was depicted in many paintings with a leaf covering his junk.
Tim Horton’s promotes misandry because they sell dough-nut holes — which are shaped a lot like gonades — which they encourage customers to devour.

/sarcasm off/

sidestinkappleeye
8 years ago

Who knew the creators of southpark were secret MRAs

Kim
Kim
8 years ago

Is this guy actually in Australia? Because I can assure him that the feminists in Australia are every bit as dangerous as the ones in Canada (i.e. not dangerous at all)

Yoyo
Yoyo
8 years ago
Reply to  Mike Anderson

Yay for down under and our feminist university trained drop bears

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
8 years ago

Yay for down under and our feminist university trained drop bears

Surely there is a horrifying marsupial you could drop on them instead?

lowquacks
lowquacks
8 years ago

@Bagelsan

Drop bears are terrifying marsupials. They resemble the common koala but drop down on people walking underneath them and bite their heads. If you smear Vegemite behind your ears while bushwalking, that’ll keep them away.

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Surely if we want to go for a terrifyingly feminine source of menace we need a spider. It’s not like Australia doesn’t have a nice selection to choose from.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Idk, I like the idea of marsupials better than spiders, but then again, I’m terrified of spiders (and I mean the harmless kind even, forget Australia’s selection of deadly ones)

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Well, there is the rare and very cute Giant Shoe Spider of West Gippsland, but she’s too lazy to train to do anything.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

If I knew how to make animated gifs, I would totally do one like this of her! 😀

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

But if we made it a spider they could try to appropriate LOTR and give The Matrix a rest for a while.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Spider cat works I guess…and I am half not looking forward to The Hobbit and its Lots of Giant Spiders (wtf was with Tolkien and the giant spiders anyways?)

CassandraSays
CassandraSays
8 years ago

Tolkien’s spider issue is even weirder when you consider the fact that he was English. Not a lot of really scary spiders in England. It would have made more sense if he’d had Bilbo facing off against a bunch of evil wasps.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Is there any Anti Misandry Hero type for them in LotR? Can’t say I can think of any.

The thought of MRAs as hobbits is kinda funny, though. Or one hobbit, at least. “My precious” in their cases would be their boners.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

I wonder if he threw in the spiders when doing The Hobbit as a kids’ story and just went from there? I haven’t read enough about the development and chronology to know when Ungoliant entered the picture. Started Unfinished Tales once and couldn’t get into it at all, having read The Silmarillion already.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

“Is there any Anti Misandry Hero type for them in LotR? Can’t say I can think of any.”

Hmm…if we pretend that elves are all women and dwarves men, then I guess Thorin. But no, that doesn’t really work either as the Hobbit is annoyingly devoid of women.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Maybe Boromir, heroically slain by orcs feminists!

Rakali
8 years ago

Did anyone else wonder if Son is deliberately hoping to move to Canada to distance himself of embarrassing manly Dad? Also, Sydney. I hang my head in shame. Australia, you’re standing in it.