I’ve seen some strange and paranoid comments on Men’s Rights hate site A Voice for Men, but this recent comment may be the strangest and paranoidest I’ve ever seen. In the comments to a post outing one of the protesters at the Warren Farrell talk at the University of Toronto, a commenter called Redfield is worried that Canada has now become some sort of death trap for men. Because of all the feminism.
That’s right: Because a couple of feminist college students in Toronto made jokey remarks on Twitter about killing all men, this man is afraid that his 18-year-old son will be in actual physical danger from evil feminists if he sets foot in Canada.
In a later comment, he reports that he and his sons will be going to Canada after all:
But he wonders if there are any “travel advisories” that can, I guess, warn him where feminists tend to congregate:
In the comments here at Man Boobz, Cloudiah imagines how his conversation with the consulate staffer might have gone:
Mid-day at the Consulate General of Canada in Sydney.
Pierre: Hello, you’ve reached the Consulate General of Canada. My name is Pierre. How may I help you?
MRA: I am planning a trip to Canada with my sons next year, and I wanted to know what the feminist threat level will be?
Pierre: Excuse me?
MRA: Yellow? Orange? RED???
Pierre: I’m sorry, I don’t understand.
MRA: I need to know what steps I need to take to protect myself and my boys from being killed by feminists. Do we need to get any shots?
Pierre: Did you say ‘feminists?’
MRA: How many men would you estimate are killed by feminists in Canada in January? February? Or do feminists only thaw out in the Spring?
Pierre: You think we freeze feminists?
MRA: I need to make travel plans!
Pierre: Sir, I think you might have been misinformed.
MRA: I assure you that my information is accurate. It cannot be denied that feminists have been engaged in a campaign to kill all men in Canada.
Pierre: Sir, I believe I would have heard about that.
MRA: I SAW A VIDEO! A pack of rabid feminists tore Warren Farrell apart, limb from limb, and feasted on his spleen!
Pierre: Warren who?
MRA: Then an angry mob of feminist zombies attacked John the Otter with flamethrowers. Or maybe one of them had a cigarette lighter, but it was definitely menacing.
Pierre: John the what?
MRA: They might have accidentally singed his sleeve! Or murdered him with fire!
Pierre: Sir, I’m not sure how to say this but… It might be best if you stayed home.
MRA: It’s because they’re SPERMJACKING us now, right? You’re saying that for my own protection. I get you.
Pierre: Um, sure. Right. Please do not come to Canada. Ever.
MRA: THEY’RE POINTING A GUN AT YOUR HEAD RIGHT NOW, AREN’T THEY?
Pierre: [Holds phone in front of his face for a moment. Slowly places it back in the cradle.]
MRA: [Hears dial tone.] Oh my god, they’ve killed him. I must alert A Voice for Men!
I think this is literally how these guys see the world.
This may be why Men’s Rights movement is so much less popular these days (as a search term at least) than one up-and-coming rival for the world’s attention: Smelly discharge. Google Trends doesn’t lie!
Thanks to Cloudiah for coming up with this as well. She is winning so many internets she may need to move into a bigger place.
To see more things the Men’s Rights movement is less popular than, click here.
NOTE: I am aware that “paranoidest” is not a real word. The correct term is “paranoidallyest.”
You have GOT to be shitting me.
Canada is no land of misandrist feminazis lurking behind every single tree. (I haven’t checked every tree, mind you. We *do* have lots of them.)
I imagine the poor person who took this twit’s call must have felt like someone just plunged them into OZ or Narnia or some other place that makes no sense.
Too bad the jackass is still going to come to my country, though. We have enough of his idiot kind as it is.
Oh. Oh my god. That man is… so right to be concerned. Seriously. No man is safe in Canada, especially MRA’s. You see, we have trained bees (that’s where they’ve been all this time) to detect men who have taken the Red Pill and sting them to death. Or at least herd them into the forests where the Womoose (formerly known by their oppressor names ‘moose’) stomp them to death. Aiming for the penises first. And of course all the universities have women’s studies courses- that’s all they teach!! We find the maths and sciences to be oppressive, so we just study Dworkin. Not that it should matter to his son- we prefer our men illiterate- it distracts them from being good providers.
Damn. And here I’d been hoping we could trick them all into going North of the Border, then seal it. Ah, well….. I suppose dumping our toxic waste on our neighbors is poor manners, or something.
It’s the bears you gotta worry about.
http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/2875293_460s.jpg
I don’t want MRAs coming to my country and taking all of the Poutine.
I mean, Canadian drivers scare the everloving fuck out of me, but that may be because “100 kph” is faster than I think it is.
@Mordsith
Also the moose, everyone thinks moose just stand there, but they charge you, and if you accidentally hit one with your car, your car becomes a pancake.
@ Freemage- you deal with your toxic waste, we’ll deal with ours (barring trans-national pipelines- seriously, dudes, do not let that happen to you).
we’ve got rocks and trees and trees and rocks and rocks and trees and trees and rocks and…. WATER!
(dear lord let me have done the html right!)
I’m all for them avoiding place with a high feminist threat level! My immediate area is definitely feminist-red-alert, MRAs, just fyi! You’ll probably get spermjacked just by talking to me!
barring trans-national pipelines
Can we send all the MRAs to Alaska, perhaps?
Hey don’t joke, part of the reason I don’t camp is because I’m afraid of turning into bear food.
Hey, some enterprising person ought to e-mail this whole thing to The Star (formerly known as The Toronto Star). It’s been relevant for some time, but it just went from relevant scary (that rabid poop flinging monkey got a hold of the kitchen knives! Quick, someone call animal control!) to mind blowingly dumb relevant (that rabid poop flinging monkey just called animal control on us. And it doesn’t plan to wash up before they get here).
@ Bagelsan- Yesssss!! And their punishment will be to be ruled by Mama Bear Palin!!
I want to live in Canada. The fact MRAs are apparently scared of it makes it all the more appealing.
It’s literally impossible to parody these guys. They’re just too ridiculous.
I vote we send them to Somalia, the libertarian paradise, since a lot of these guys claim to be Rand fans anyway.
Somalia has enough challenges. I think we should send kitten videos to Somalia, and send MRAs to Texas. (But first we will rescue any manboobzers who live in Texas.)
I hadn’t realized until this post that the guy really DID make the phone call. I would pay good money to hear a recording of that call.
I vote for Antarctica. They can be all manly and Galt-like and challenge nature, and there will definitely not be many women around to vex them. No risk of spermjacking!
His sons should go to University of Toronto. That should keep psycho dad at a safe distance.
cloudiah: Hey, rescue me!!!
Anarctica’s no good. It’s full of PENGUIN WHORES.
Don’t send them to Texas!!! We have enough wingnuts as it is. We don’t need MRAs on top of the racists and flat-earthers (see Texas State Board of Education, who will be revising science textbooks this year). We don’t need any more irrational mouth-breathers.
Whatever became of Reddit Island? I think MRAs would feel right at home there.
Quantumscale, you ninja’d my brain – I was thinking exactly the same thing. Where’s Reddit Island when it’s needed?