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Spearheader: The real victims of predatory female teachers are the guys “hot teachers” AREN’T having sex with

Van Halen videos are not reality.

Men’s Rights activists are constantly posting links to stories of women committing horrible crimes – what some have taken to calling “women behaving badly” (WBB) stories – and almost reveling in the fact that, yes, some women do indeed do horrible shit.

MRAs are particularly obsessed with stories of female high school teachers preying on their underage students. While this partly reflects the general MRA obsession with badly behaving women, MRAs do actually make a legitimate point here: while most people understand that female victims of predatory male teachers are indeed victims, quite a few people regard male victims of attractive female teachers as “lucky” boys who get to live out the schoolboy fantasy of having sex with a “hot teacher.”

So when I saw that The Spearhead was featuring  a guest post titled “The Hot Teacher Myth, and How it Hurts Men,” I expected to see some version of this argument being made. What I found was one of the strangest and creepiest things I’ve ever read: Walt Forest seems to think that the real problem is that so few guys get the opportunity to have sex with “hot teachers.”

Forest points out (correctly) that cases or female teachers sexually abusing their male students are actually fairly rare. He goes on to argue that all the attention paid to predatory “hot teachers” in the media promotes the “myth” that male and female sexuality is fundamentally the same. This, he suggests, is bad for men:

How does this myth hurt men?

Set aside for a moment the image of the hot teacher and her underage male victim which the media force on us with such insistence. Instead imagine a far more common scenario: a young man (or for that matter, a not-so-young man) who does NOT have sex with his teacher, but desperately wants to.

I’m not quite sure in what world lots of young and not-so-young men – not teenage boys — are being taught by “hot” high school teachers. Perhaps the “hot teachers” here are actually “hot” college professors or grad students and the men in question are college students? Or is Forest simply trying to avoid the question of sexual abuse by pretending that underage boys are “men?”

Forest continues to explore the plight of this poor fellow:

In fact this man would like to have sex with many of the women around him, but — with very few exceptions — he cannot.

Well, yeah. There are 3.5 billion girls and women on planet earth; even the most advanced Lothario is only going to be having sex with a very small fraction of a percentage of them.

But alas, the media tortures this hapless undersexed fellow by suggesting that women like sex as much as men, even though the overwhelming majority of women won’t actually have sex with him personally.

[O]ur media and increasingly ordinary people assure this man that women he hardly knows (even his teachers) will suddenly lead him by the hand to their beds for no other reason than the pleasure of having sex with him, “no strings attached.” This kind of thing is ordinary, we tell him. It “happens all the time.”

Well, in porn it does. Most people are aware that porn isn’t reality.

When it does not happen—of course it never does—he is left to think that he must be something less than an ordinary man. If he dares to voice his disappointment, we tell him that he places excessive importance on sex, views women as “objects,” and the rest of the standard pop feminist rhetoric designed to put the blame back on the man himself. We blame the man because we MUST if we are to avoid blaming ourselves for all the lies we are telling him.

I’m pretty sure that most men – or even most teenage boys — don’t spend their days wondering why their lives aren’t exactly like Penthouse Letters.

These lies hurt men. It is difficult for anyone who has not suffered this hurt first hand to understand just how bad it can be, but from my own experience I believe these lies are helping to create the ongoing male suicide epidemic (which our society, tellingly, also refuses to acknowledge).

Men kill themselves because “hot teachers” don’t seduce them on a regular basis? Really?

These lies certainly make countless men miserable. For this reason I believe exposing the myth that male and female sexualities are the same should be the men’s movement’s first priority. Hot teacher stories obviously make up only a tiny part of this myth, but because they are such a blatant distortion of reality, they are a good place to start.

Quite a few of The Spearhead’s regulars were put off by the, well, weirdness of Forest’s post. But others chimed in to agree. Indeed, Arpagus actually took Forest’s strange argument a step further, earning himself some actual Spearhead downvotes in the process:

[T]he female sex offender charade has been the most frustrating aspect of feminism for me personally, not least because I have experienced a great deal of sexual frustration in the past, and nothing can be more offensive to celibate men than pretending there is an epidemic of female rapists. …

It is a most distinctive sign of cultural decline that we have forgotten that pussy is good. This ancient wisdom has been brainwashed out of our culture by feminism. Now pussy is rape and abuse just like male sexuality is. Traditional society might have punished an adulteress for a student-teacher type of relationship, but they certainly did not indulge in any charade about the boy being a “victim,” because they knew he got lucky if you consider the sex itself. There are reasons why a society might want to proscribe those kinds of relationships, but the boy being a “victim” of “abuse” is most assuredly not one of them.

MRA elder “Zed” gently corrected Arpagus in a comment that was nearly as strange, suggesting that predatory “hot teachers”

are not being punished for “harming the boys”, that is just a convenient excuse. What they are actually being punished for is giving away free pussy.

If you take a close look at the outrage among men these days for having to pay full price for used pussy, their anger is divided between the guys who got it at a price far lower than they paid for it, and the women who gave it away to another man for less than they charged him for it.

It would be like a rich man buying an entire wine cellar of Dom Pérignon at the going price of $200+/bottle – savoring what indulgence his wealth could buy him – only to find his kitchen wench had been pouring free flutes for the pool boy.

Or, like it a member of the Medellín Cartel discovering that their US connection to whom they shipped 2 metric tons of high quality cocaine, was laying out lines for her friends.

She is not being punished for “harming the boys” (HA!) but for black marketing the product that the pussy cartel owns.

The women are being punished FOR allowing the boys to get lucky, and get some without having to lay out 3 months salary for an engagement ring and $35,000 on a Bridezilla party for cupcake.

Now that’s the kind of comment that gets upvotes on The Spearhead, and makes Zed a revered figure in the Men’s Rights movement.

EDITED TO ADD: Not sure how I missed this, but Arpagus is apparently the truly creepy Norwegian blogger Eivind Berge, whom we’ve met before.

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Nova
Nova
8 years ago

So, hot women suck because they’re not giving it up to enough men and they also suck for giving it away for free too much?

Unless one is a sex worker, I thought sex was always free.

Maybe I’m doing it wrong?

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Leave to some “incel” whiner to minimize rape because it isn’t happening to him. Which, what the fuck is wrong with him?

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Good grief, so many fails.

Not having sex does not make you a victim.

Duty of care seems to be something this moron is completely unaware of.

Consent (even before we get to the issue of statutory rape) seems to be something he is either unaware of or doesn’t believe in.

None of which is surprising. “I can’t fuck every woman I want to, whether she wants it or not” is the standard – baseline, maybe – MRA whine.

Mind you, I’d go so far as to say that someone who goes on about “pussy” – be it free or not – should never get within hailing distance of any woman, let alone get to have sex with one. Buy a goddam fleshlight and GYOW. Everyone will be better off.

Nova
Nova
8 years ago

I don’t think they even understand that these situations ARE rape. Guy gets to sleep with a woman = always good, in their minds. Apparently, they’d be happy to sleep with any woman, therefore ALL men are happy to sleep with ANY woman.

I’m seconding the fleshlight/ blowup doll suggestion. These guys should not be around women ever.

Ravencita
Ravencita
8 years ago

Long time lurker, first time poster.
So, let me get this straight: believing that men of any age always want teh sexins all of the time is telling it like it is, but claiming that boys can be sexual abuse victims at the hands of women is misandry?
But I guess ignoring actual misandry (and buying into misandrist constructs) is the MRA way.
*goes back to lurking*

lauralot
lauralot
8 years ago

So the real problem here isn’t that there are male teen victims of female sex predators, it’s that there aren’t enough teenage boys being raped.

Graham
8 years ago

When I was a teenage boy I did believe the letters in Penthouse were real, and I was quite frustrated for a long time later when real life didn’t turn out to be porn — so I can sort of relate to some of Forest’s article.

Weirdly, though, after I grew up I got over it.

Kim
Kim
8 years ago

What if *gasp* the teacher isn’t hot? Should the boys still appreciate being raped?

Nada
Nada
8 years ago

‘I believe these lies are helping to create the ongoing male suicide epidemic (which our society, tellingly, also refuses to acknowledge).’

This is…. I can’t even… Raping boys doesn’t lead to depression or suicide — NOT raping them does! It’s so hard to keep track of whether women’s vagina are the cause of all social ills or the saviors of mankind every week.

Know it’s been said before, but if a sane person we to ever define misandry, this would be it.

amavra
8 years ago

Except they are not okay with sleeping with any woman. Or at least the only women they seem to remember existing are “hot women”. If you are not a hot woman, you do not fulfill the function of “make boners’ and therefore don’t count. Not-hot women still can’t rape men though, because that would make the not-hot (not real) woman more powerful than the man and that is literally against the laws of the universe. Because they still see sex as something that men take from women (or that women give to men) and this transaction doesn’t have room for the idea that women can rape men. They also seem to see arousal as being synonymous with consent – they think if they have a boner they consent to sex (or even require sex), and this translates to thinking that a woman who is aroused or looks sexually inviting is also automatically consenting.

it really makes me sad, because these are such harmful ideas. They are hurting men and men’s rights with this stuff – shouldn’t they care about that?

Molly Moon
Molly Moon
8 years ago

Wait, I’m confused. Who is the pussy cartel?

amandatheatheist
8 years ago

I have never read so much blatant objectifying as women – literally equating women to objects.

It’s very sad that anyone could ever see any teacher taking advantage of a student as anything less than terribly wrong.

amandatheatheist
8 years ago

*of women

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Wouldn’t the pussy cartel be all those cats who are really David?

lauralot
lauralot
8 years ago

It’s very sad that anyone could ever see any teacher taking advantage of a student as anything less than terribly wrong.

I suppose if they admitted that teacher/teen relationships are not okay, they might have to answer for the way so many MRAs lust after 14 year old girls. Still, you think they’d explain that away with some screed about the evils of women.

Nepenthe
Nepenthe
8 years ago

Apparently, they’d be happy to sleep with any woman, therefore ALL men are happy to sleep with ANY woman.

Whoa, whoa. No fatties, right?

amavra
8 years ago

Oops I forgot that I changed my name from Ronalon to amavra. I only comment a few times here but I read pretty often.

Runic244
Runic244
8 years ago

I’m honestly not even sure what these people want anymore. My understanding is that they are pissed off that women are all sluts nowadays, and also that nobody will fuck them. They are pissed off that women are out there stealing jobs from men, and also they are angry because housewives don’t get jobs and stop sponging off of their husbands. They are angry that women aren’t having enough babies, but also angry that women are having so many babies. I honestly don’t know what women could hypothetically do to make these men happy, even assuming that they were inclined to try to do so. No matter what women do these guys will find something to yell at them for.

katz
8 years ago

Sorry, I can’t get past “kitchen wench”.

Nepenthe
Nepenthe
8 years ago

Unpaid Help, I’ll go with you on that as long as “hailing distance” includes via ship whistle morse code, semaphore, and smoke signals. I still think the answer is some South Atlantic seabird-ridden rock.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Runic – I think they want every woman (and girl, since age of consent is MISANDRY) to be instantly available to them the minute they get a boner, and then to revert to virginity the minute they’ve finished. And to be unable to speak, of course, and not need to eat or do anything but slave for them.

Robots, in other words.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Nepenthe, I’d say a moon landing would be about right. Or Mars, maybe.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

PS what did South Atlantic seabirds do to deserve having MRAs inflicted on them? Cruelty to wildlife, that is.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Sorry, I can’t get past “kitchen wench”.

I read that as “kitten wrench.”

MOST. ADORABLE. TOOL. EVER.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

I have no idea why this video’s labelled ‘kitten wrench’ but it is too cute not to post.

http://youtu.be/ff_zBxmOgwo

chuckeedee
chuckeedee
8 years ago

I confess that there are times that I have cause to wonder about my involvement in the mrm. At least the downvotes given to Arpagus’ stupid comments provide some measure of reassurance. I detest this cry-baby element that manages to seep its way into the mrm. Retch. Makes me want to jump on the next space-ship to mars. /vent – back to fighting those diabolical feminists.

blitzgal
8 years ago

Hey creepsters — you know why no one wants to fuck you? Because you genuinely believe that a woman’s body is exactly the same as a bottle of wine, and that with the proper investment, it belongs to you and you get to do whatever you want with it. THIS ATTITUDE MAKES YOU CREEPY.

Nova
Nova
8 years ago

@ Nepenthe: No fatties and no old ladies over the age of 25.

Wait! I get it! That’s rape. When the woman isn’t hot or is over the age of 25 or doesn’t please their boner. A hot chick forcing herself on someone is totes cool, no matter what.

On a mildly related note, I am off to commit horrible acts of misandry, by going to my job as an adult cabaret waitress. Not only are we all sluts and wearing next to nothing but NONE of us will have sex with them!

These poor guys. Teh Wimmenz just torture them endlessly. By either being sluts, or not being slutty enough. Not sure which…

katz
8 years ago

Chuckeedee’s momentary epiphany reminds me of that time Vaarsuvius cast Owl’s Wisdom on Belkar.

Nepenthe
Nepenthe
8 years ago

Shorter chuckles: “Most of the people in my movement are fuckwits and kinda scary and the rest I haven’t heard speak, but this hasn’t made me reconsider whether I am also a fuckwit and kinda scary.”

I find this apropos, probably been posted before:

aworldanonymous
8 years ago

19 year old virgin here, well aware of social anxiety preventing me from getting any, as I’ve said before, many times, stopped caring after high school. Why these guys still do is anyone’s guess.

aworldanonymous
8 years ago

Actually, I shouldn’t lie, I do have my flashes where I think “It sucks that I’m too socially awkward to have a girlfriend or even an fwb type relationship”, but then I get over it and do practical stuff.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Aworld – that being the difference between people who are adults maturity-wise as well as just chronologically.

How’re you doing, btw? Did that bug turn into flu?

katz
8 years ago

Aworldanon, I thought you were dating a girl a little while ago?

thebewilderness
8 years ago

The world view of the abuser is a very creepy thing. Particularly with regard to their view of abusers preying on children.

lisslalissar42
8 years ago

Kitteh, in case you’re curious the video is called “kitten wrench” because its set to a song called “Monkey Wrench”.

katz
8 years ago

Ah, this is the strip I was referring to. I can never find anything in those archives!

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Oh! Thanks, lissla. I’ve no sound on my pc. Not that I’d have known the reference if I had! 😀

captainbathrobe
8 years ago

Aworld, I was a virgin until I was 19, and even afterward I would go as much as three years at a time without sex (involuntarily). Good things will happen eventually. If they could happen to me, they can happen to you. 🙂

twomoogles
twomoogles
8 years ago

This makes less sense than most MRA weirdness. That last comment confused me a lot. I thought MRA thought women were all *supposed* to hold out for a guy to marry because otherwise they were riding the cock carousel or something? That comment seems to say both that ‘used’ pussy is awful, and that women who insist on marriage with a big wedding etc. are awful. WHAT DO THEY WANT?!?!

aworldanonymous
8 years ago

@katz

I haven’t dated anyone since High School, I don’t remember if I was a regular commenter here during my last relationship or not actually, but atm I’m not in any kind of relationship, I have a few female friends whom given time MIGHT show an interest in romantic stuff, but that’s about it.

sabresguy5
sabresguy5
8 years ago

Instead imagine a far more common scenario: a young man (or for that matter, a not-so-young man) who does NOT have sex with his teacher, but desperately wants to.

Yeah, god forbid a ‘hot’ teacher not take advantage of her students. How dare she not seduce kids! There should be, like, a law against that kinda shit.

…but from my own experience I believe these lies are helping to create the ongoing male suicide epidemic (which our society, tellingly, also refuses to acknowledge).

Experience with trying to kill yourself? crushing on your Biology teacher? or just being a sexually frustrated man-child projecting his sorry self all over the place?

Also, have big heaping bowl of FUCK YOU for daring to type that, you horrid little turd.

…I believe exposing the myth that male and female sexualities are the same should be the men’s movement’s first priority.

Women liking sex = MISANDRY
Women not having sex (with me) = MISANDRY

This guy is a master of doublethink.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Nova, have fun at torture… er, work.

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
8 years ago

Anyone else wondering what TS has to say about this?

drst
drst
8 years ago

Somewhere buried under the 9 layers of garbage there’s a microscopic piece of a kernel of a valid observation. It’s just getting choked to death by the shit on top of it.

(The valid observation being that much of the media and the culture in the US does push the idea that all men will end up dating a supermodel regardless of their own physical attractiveness or situation. And that myth causes some harm to both men and women. The thing is, I’m pretty confident the vast majority of humans figure out that’s bullshit sometime during puberty or just before or after. And then move on with their lives. More evidence MRAs have never matured emotionally past the age of 14. Maybe that’s where the creepy ass obsession with underage girls comes in. Ew.)

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Pillowinhell: not really.

Ravencita
Ravencita
8 years ago

@drst
Because where you are in 8th grade obviously determines where/ what you’ll do for your WHOLE LIFE. Back to non-sarcasm, what do you think MRAs would do if they could time warp back to middle school?

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
The Kittehs' Unpaid Help
8 years ago

Instead imagine a far more common scenario: a young man (or for that matter, a not-so-young man) who does NOT have sex with his teacher, but desperately wants to.

Yeah, god forbid a ‘hot’ teacher not take advantage of her students. How dare she not seduce kids! There should be, like, a law against that kinda shit.

Yes, even excluding the major matters of rape, duty of care, etc, it’s that old MRA attitude that a woman is supposed to let some random guy or kid who has the hots for her fuck her.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Ravencita, if MRAs could go back to 8th grade, they’d be totes alpha and have all the ladies.

Sarcasm aside, if they could go back, they’d be right where they are.

WordSpinner
WordSpinner
8 years ago

I really think MRAs should learn the difference between sexual fantasy and reality. I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of students, especially high-school age or older, end up having a crush on one of their teachers and others probably fantasize about a non-existant teacher (this isn’t my thing, but… rule 34). This does not mean that it is okay for teachers to exploit their students the same way that women having rape fantasies doesn’t mean that rape is suddenly okay and not traumatic. People fantasize all the time about things they don’t actually want to happen, and I’d say that young people, who are horny but not necessarily ready for the reality of a relationship, do so especially (what would the average fifteen year-old feel if their celebrity crush actually tried to sleep with them?)

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