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Vagina and Consequences

Loretta Lynn was singing about a different pill altogether.

Over on Married Man Sex Life, doucheblogger Athol Kay has provided the ladies with a helpful checklist of the things they need to do, or to be, or to do be do be do, to become the ultimate “red pill” girlfriend or wife. But the women he describes sound a lot less like Trinity from The Matrix than the robotified housewives from The Stepford Wives.

Mr. Kay’s list of demands is too long to quote in its entirety, but here are a few of the choicer items:

(4)  Understands that there is a sexual marketplace, and that women have an earlier peak of sexual desirability than men do.

Presumably if she forgets this, her manospherian swain will happily neg her back to a properly less-positive assessment of her rapidly decaying beauty as a woman over the age of 14.

(13)  Understands that divorce sucks and is more akin to getting treatment for cancer than having cosmetic surgery.

I sort of agree with this one, actually: for women married to Athol Kay’s followers, getting divorced would be a lot like removing a malignant tumor.

(14)  Likes men in a general sense for who they are and what they do, rather than detesting all men in general and making an exception for the tiny few in her nuclear family.

(Huh. Project much?)

(15)  Understands the risks both men and women take in having serious relationships, and is willing to negotiate ways to verify trustworthiness in each other. Sees doing this as evidence of true commitment rather than an insulting invasion of privacy.

I have no fucking idea what he’s talking about here. Lie detector tests? Waterboarding?

(20)  Doesn’t keep the Red Pill a secret from those that need it.

That’s what we need, more women lecturing women on how terrible they are.

I’ve saved the best for last:

(3)  Understands that what she does with her vagina always has some sort of consequence.

Seriously. Please think twice before tattooing Homer Simpson on you hoo-hah! (This has actually been done. You’ll have to look up the pictures yourself.)

In the comments, BlackCat adds a 21st item to the list:

(21) Understands that current society/public opinion, the vast majority of churches, and almost all laws, courts and government agencies dealing with families are all biased heavily against men, and that until the incentives and disincentives return to a more balanced state, men are completely justified in being gun-shy and avoiding commitment and other entanglements as much as possible.

Corollary to (21): Appreciates the men, especially informed (red pill) men, who are willing to take the chance at a relationship despite the above, and goes out of her way to prevent them from being taken advantage of, and to publicly denounce those who do take advantage of them.

So come on, gals, start lining up for your chance to jump through endless hoops for the chance to get with a dude who thinks he’s doing you a gigantic favor by even considering dating you in the first place!

While we’re at it, here’s my favorite scene from The Stepford Wives (the original 1975 version, of course), in which [SPOILER ALERT] Joanna, the new gal in Stepford, discovers that her friend Bobbie is no longer the free-spirited Women’s Libber she thought she knew.

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The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

Let’s see:

“Well there are lots of girls out there who are careless enough to put themselves in that situation on a regular basis.”

So you don’t think a man has any responsibility at all in this matter? Is it soooo terrible to think he might wear a condom if he’s not up for fatherhood? What about all those ‘careless, stupid’ men who don’t give a damn if they impregnate a woman, or who skip as soon as they know she’s pregnant, or even, y’know, insist she get an abortion whether she wants to or not? How come they don’t come in for any condemnation?

You also talk as if the dangers of pregnancy and childbirth, and the TOTAL change of one’s life for a good twenty years that comes with having a child to raise, were a mere inconvenience. You ignore the shaming and ostracism that has been single women’s lot with pregnancy (and which I would bet is still the case in conservative communities). You ignore the sheer ineffectiveness of things like abstinence-only ‘education’ which makes sure young people know little or nothing about sexual matters, pregnancy or anything else.

If a woman has an abortion, there’s no ‘person’ to think “Oh noes, I was not born!” It’s something that never happened. A fertilised egg is not a human being. It’s a potential human being, not an acutal one: it has no rights that trump those of the woman or girl carrying it.

If someone needed an organ transplant to live, would you think they had the right to forcibly take that organ from you against your will? That’s what you seem to want of women: that we be forced to donate our bodies as life-support systems whether we want to or not. You don’t have that right; neither does an embryo.

The vast majority of ‘abortions’ are spontaneous. They’re miscarriages. You want to complain about all those ‘babies’ that were never born, go complain to God. He’s the uber-abortionist.

CassandraSays
12 years ago

Here, I have something much more interesting and originaly than abortion troll. Check it out – a cat getting into a bath of its own volition.

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

She’s adorable!

drst
drst
12 years ago

David that means you would not be here.

I have never understood why you people think this is a rational line of argument. If my mom had aborted me I WOULDN’T EXIST. So I wouldn’t have feelings about it either way. And I do not know that many people who have such a fucking high opinion of themselves that they think their existence in the world is so super special they’d rather have had their mom go through an unwanted pregnancy and birth instead.

I love my Mom. I love my siblings and my Dad. If it would have been better for my Mom for me not to exist, I’M REALLY REALLY OKAY WITH THAT BECAUSE BY DEFINITION I WOULDN’T BE HERE TO CARE.

Do you think it is OK to kill a baby just so a girl can save face, and keep their freedom to continue their careless, stupid, and destructive behavior.

It’s not a baby. It’s a fetus, or an embryo. A baby is an infant human that no longer needs the support of a human body to stay alive. And if it needs to use my body to stay alive, I get to decide whether that happens or not, not you. It’s not your body. You, grown-ass alleged adult, have no right to use my body to keep yourself alive. The government cannot forcibly use my body to keep you alive. The government and you have no authority to forcibly use my body to stay pregnant against my will and give birth against my will. I have the right to control my own body and that right is inviolable.

But for the sake of argument, what about women who have abortions not because they are “saving face” but because they were raped? Or coerced by an abusive partner into pregnancy? Or experienced a birth control failure? Or are unemployed? Or have no insurance? It costs between $7-10K to give birth to a healthy baby in a hospital. That doesn’t include all the pre-natal care, either, that’s just giving birth. How many people do you know who have $10K lying around?

What about women who already have a lot of kids and are worried about being able to care for them if they have to deal with another infant? What about women who will lose their jobs if they become pregnant (which happens all the time)? Women who have no paid sick time and since the US has no law requiring maternity leave, would have to quit their jobs?

What about women who find out the fetus has a genetic abnormality that means it will never develop a brain stem? Women who find out the amniotic sack never developed and the fetus is literally being crushed by the pregnancy?

You know that the majority of women seeking abortions are already mothers? 40% of them already have at least one child. This “slutty single woman looking to erase her mistakes” is a myth you forced birther nuts cling to like a reality-obstructing shield.

By the way where are all the women that have done this great thing of having rights to choose what to do with their own body. I don’t see their blogs talking about how liberating it was to exercise this power that is so sacred, important, and necessary.

Then you can’t use Google. Try “I don’t regret my abortion” and you’ll find those posts.

(I know this troll claimed zie wasn’t coming back, but these types tend to lurk looking for validation, so what the hell.)

The Kittehs' Unpaid Help

@drst

Applause! Applause! You said it much better’n me.

CassandraSays
12 years ago

Actually this one’s even better. No, I will not get out of this bathtub! Because even though I’m a freaky cat that likes water, I am still a cat.

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

Hey, I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Planned Parenthood. I would be dead of cervical cancer.

Although, if my mom would have aborted me I prolly wouldn’t have given a shit because I was a fucking embryo, dummy.

katz
12 years ago

Less stupid abortion argument, more cats in bathtubs!

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
12 years ago

David that means you would not be here. Now you may say oh, my mom isn’t like that, or my mom would never do that.

I don’t know about David’s mom, but I know my mother would never go back in time to convince her younger self to have an abortion. I mean, she doesn’t even have a time machine. I think.

katz
12 years ago

What if you went back in time to convince your mother to have an abortion? Time travel paradox!

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
12 years ago

Personally, I never got that whole “time paradox” thing. I think time is pretty laid back, and would just go with the flow.

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

What if you could go back in time and convince your mom to wash a cat in the bathtub??? Now, you may think your mom isn’t like that, or your mom would never do that. Well, there are lots of girls out there who wash cats in bathtubs on a regular basis, and it makes me SICK.

katz
12 years ago

Let’s face it, if you travel back in time for any purpose other than having sex with yourself, you’re squandering it.

Pam
Pam
12 years ago

Why are there four S’s in Mississippi? Four I’s and only two P’s…and one “M” as far as I know?

Bee
Bee
12 years ago

What if bees didn’t sting but just used sarcasm to make you feel bad instead?

Hey now.

CassandraSays
12 years ago

What if cats really did have thumbs? Would they enslave us all, or just ignore us since they could open their own cans? What if orcas developed legs and learned how to walk on land? Would the orca empire be good or bad for humanity? I mean, they do save us from sharks sometimes, so they seem to like us.

What if your mom found out that you were anti-choice and was really angry with you on behalf of all the other women whose choices you want to take away?

CassandraSays
12 years ago

Or what if you found out that your mother actually did have an abortion, years before you were born, and if she hadn’t had that abortion then you might not exist today?

Pam
Pam
12 years ago

What if evolution was actually a real thing and resulted in Superdogs?

pecunium
12 years ago

red_texan: I see the proceeds from your t-shirts go to planned parenthood. What if having you would have been inconvenient for your mom? What if you were the result of one night of indiscretion, and she didn’t want to be reminded of it every day for the rest of her life.

David that means you would not be here. Now you may say oh, my mom isn’t like that, or my mom would never do that.

You’re right… I wouldn’t be here. And I’d not care. I don’t need to say, “oh my mother’s not like that”, because it doesn’t matter.

The odds of my being here are 1:1, in hindsight, and almost ∞:1 against if one tries to predict it.

In neither case does it change the right of a woman to choose to have/not have a child.

It’s also a shit argument. I know people who wouldn’t exist if their mother had not had an abortion. Life is messy, and complicated.

I won’t post or visit here again because, after learning what you stand for, your site doesn’t deserve to have traffic.

So you admit to being a moral coward, unwilling to defend your position.

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
12 years ago

Or what if you found out that your mother actually did have an abortion, years before you were born, and if she hadn’t had that abortion then you might not exist today?

Checkmate, anti-choicers!

Kakanian
Kakanian
12 years ago

>I don’t think the 50 million aborted babies, if they had a chance to voice their opinion, would think it was such a great thing.

From what I remember, abortions usually happen during earlier developmental stages.

Only rural chinese and other people with no access to regular medical abortions tend to kill the actual babies.

So funnily enough, abortion actually prevents baby killings.

Dvärghundspossen
12 years ago

Yeah, if somebody wants to argue that abortion is wrong, they really need to argue that the embryo or fetus is an individual with rights, AND that these rights include using somebody else’s body to stay alive.

If we look at the first step of the argument, everybody knows that there’s a gradual development from fertilized egg to full baby. This fact in itself does not imply that a single cell, a fertilized egg, count as a human being with rights (nor does it imply that only a fully-formed baby capable of surviving outside the woman’s body count as a human being with rights for that matter). You might just as well draw the conclusion that there are some embryos/fetuses that definitely don’t count, some fetuses that definitely count, and in between there’s a big gray area.

The second stage of the argument is even more difficult to pull off, since we normally think that no, the state CANNOT force somebody to be a donour of their organs or other bodily resources, even if it would be necessary to save the life of somebody else. You could try to make the argument that you’re obligated to donate if it was YOUR FAULT that the other person was depending on your bodily resources to survive, and that our laws should reflect this. So let’s accept that, for the sake of argument. What would follow? That abortion should be illegal if somebody gets pregnant after consesual sex with no contraceptions. I don’t think you could argue that pregnancy should count as the woman’s fault EVEN if she’s used normally reliable contraceptives and they happened not to work, because we do not normally punish people for having bought a thing that unexpectacly malfunctioned. And when it comes to women who have been raped, they would certainly be allowed to abort.

Even if you accept a moral principle saying that you’re obligated to donate your bodily resources to somebody else if you cased that other individual to be in a state where zir cannot survive otherwise, there are complications. Firstly, as people have already pointed out, if a couple has consensual sex without using contraceptives, and the woman gets pregnant, it isn’t just HER fault but just as much the MAN’S fault. Still, only the woman is forced to donate if we simply make abortions illegal. Perhaps one could try to make up for this by forcing the man to, say, take out a kidney and a part of his liver and put them on ice in case the baby needs them in the future. That way, both parents have to donate bodily resources to the baby, which is more fare. Secondly, we have the problem of how to determine whether it was really consensual sex with no contraceptives, rather than, say, consensual sex with a condom that broke due to a manufacturing error, or rape. If we’re gonna follow the established juridical rule of “assumed innocent until proven otherwise”, we couldn’t force a woman to carry a baby against her will unless we had PROOF that she really had consensual sex without contraceptives. Which seems pretty difficult to obtain in normal cases.

Finally, any argument according to which it’s wrong to do something that prevents potential people from existing has the consequences that a fertile woman who DOES NOT engage in heterosexual contraceptive-less fucking when she ovulates thereby does something wrong, and a fertile man who EVER does anything else than heterosexual contraceptive-less fucking is doing wrong as well. Morality is doomed.

elodieunderglass
12 years ago

Well there are lots of girls out there who are careless enough to put themselves in that situation on a regular basis

My mother had X number of abortions before she had me, where X is a highly personal number that some might think was rather high. She is a survivor of incredible childhood abuse, and her first adult sexual partners were also abusive; when she met my father in her mid-twenties, she had been sexually active for over twenty years, but had never had consensual sex. She was depressed, so depressed, and struggling so much. This does not matter.

I was an accident. My parents decided to keep me, although I was highly inconvenient, because my mother claimed to have a vision at the moment of my conception. They had just married and were awfully poor. Their house had just burned down; they could not afford to live together; my mother could not afford medical care, and instead of having midwives and ultrasounds she would beg me to kick, so that she could feel me being alive. It was very stupid of her to have this baby, but she’d had that vision, and it felt right.

I am the child that lived because of abortion.

I am the child who grew up and went on to work on a cure for cancer, and yes, I watched the mouse’s tumor shrink day by day until the mouse was healed, so I suppose that I helped cure cancer, in a very small way; at least I held a cure, in my hands. I was a child prodigy raised in poverty, and abortion gave me my chance.

I am glad that I was wanted. I am so, so glad that I was the right child, at the right time, the choice and the chance and the chosen. And if my mother had been forced to carry her children of rape, to raise them and try to love them, I would not be here. I simply would not; she, and all that she could have been, would have died long ago, long before she ever met my father, long before she ever dreamed of me.

Dvärghundspossen
12 years ago

Thanks for the story, elodieunderglass.

And oh, sorry for the weird spelling errors in my post, I wrote it in a hurry and just saw them right now.

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