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Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c): It’s “a disaster to say ‘never hit women’…..it destroys the womans ability to bond closely with the man via a good spanking.” [UPDATED WITH NOLAN RESPONSE]

Some misogynists seem to have a really difficult time telling the difference between consensual kinkiness and domestic violence. Over on the Happier Abroad forums, our old friend Peter-Andrew: Nolan(c) – who doesn’t really seem to be all that happy, honestly – tells the fellows about a woman he recently met. (Note: the faux ellipses in the quotes to follow are all from the original.)

I am now able to look a woman in the eyes, even from some distance, and know if she is a decent woman or not. I only developed this two years or so ago and have only had it happen 4 times. I am not saying that it is ONLY these women who are decent women….I am saying that the 4 this has happened to turned out to be pretty good women…

By a “pretty good woman” he seems to mean a woman who hates women nearly as much as he does:

when asking about my view of women I have been absolutely straightforward and to the point….her response “AT LAST…..a man who really knows what we are like….that makes me feel so much better because I do not have to worry about trying to present myself as I am not…..you already really know what we are like!”

She is HAPPY that I describe women as mostly liars and manipulators who try to get men to do what they want…..it is a RELIEF for her to meet such a man…..how about that?

And, even better, she likes to be spanked!

she openly says that she felt that if we were together with her strong personality she would be likely to provoke me and try to hurt me emotionally…..to which I replied “if you are naughty I will put you over my knee and spank you”..to which she replied “and I shall be naughty to make sure I am spanked”.

I was telling this new lady I met about this and how I had spanked my daughter when she was willful and naughty as well as my fav#1……she almost SWOONED at the idea of being spanked for being naughty….It was as clear as day she was very interested in getting herself spanked for being naughty…..I noticed this and pointed it out….she tried to deny it.

Uh, if she just told you she wanted to “be naughty to make sure” she’d be spanked, why would she deny this a minute later?

Somehow I suspect that this conversation didn’t transpire exactly as Mr. Nolan says it did.

In any case, our intrepid storyteller moves on to elaborate on his perverse (and not in a good way) sexualized defense of child abuse:

I said to her “it is completely normal for a girl to want to provoke her father into needing to spank her, once he does she knows he is big and strong and will protect her and provide for her….she feel more comfortable, more secure, and she will often cuddle up to her father and feel very good towards him after being spanked….my daughter did that all the time…..I bet you did that with your father too…..

And then on to a defense of violence against women:

This need does not go away just because the girl becomes a woman…..she still needs to provoke her man and he still needs to spank her so that she feels he is strong and powerful and can protect and provide for her……that is how women are.

Apparently men can’t truly “bond” with women without hitting them:

This is why it is such a disaster to say “never hit women”…..it destroys the womans ability to bond closely with the man via a good spanking. It destroys her ability to feel the security of protector and provider….something she needs…indeed….it is so insane now they call that “domestic violence” and the man can go to jail for doing what the woman needs to be done for her.”

She just shook her head and said “you are so right”……I am wondering if we will see much more of each other.

I certainly hope not.

Happily, there’s every reason to believe that this conversation is a product of Nolan’s imagination; he seems to live in a world all his own.

NOTE: Thanks to Sandra in the comments for pointing me to this horrible comment.

EDITED TO ADD: Mr. Nolan (c) has responded in the comments here, and over on Happier Abroad in more detail. Apparently I totally misrepresented him because I wasn’t able to figure out from his badly written comment that he was talking about two different women who loved being spanked. Also, because I mentioned his name with the weird punctuation , he thinks I am “subject to the fee of 1,000 troy ounces of 99.9% pure gold should I choose to levy it.” (You see, Mr. Nolan (c) has set up his own international court system in his own head, in which mentioning his name with that little copyright symbol attached to it apparently means that you owe him lots of gold.)  I haven’t read all of his comments; I’m afraid I’ll end up owing him even more gold if I do.

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Cliff Pervocracy (@pervocracy)

You owe him, like, five thousand pounds of gold dust now.

jumbofisch
12 years ago

I said to her “it is completely normal for a girl to want to provoke her father into needing to spank her, once he does she knows he is big and strong and will protect her and provide for her….she feel more comfortable, more secure, and she will often cuddle up to her father and feel very good towards him after being spanked….my daughter did that all the time…..I bet you did that with your father too…..

Wait if spanking is suppose to be arousing……. Oh……………god……………….Incessssssssssssssssssssst

This is one of the creepiest things I have read all week. x_X

Seraph
Seraph
12 years ago

I’m reminded of Christian Domestic Discipline. Why can’t people just admit that spanking is their kink and stop trying to insist that no one can possibly have a good relationship without it?

jumbofisch
12 years ago

This story reads like a bad porno opening….must doubt credibility……

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

shitthatneverhappened.txt

Snowy
Snowy
12 years ago

My brain needs to take a shower now. Yuck.

Bagelsan
Bagelsan
12 years ago

Haha, very funny posting an excerpt from a Gor novel here! Now where’s Nolan’s actual writing?

Falconer
12 years ago

I haven’t read the whole thing, but when he said he had the ability to Detect Evil Woman and that it had happened 4 times in the last 2 years, I thought, he’s met how many women in that time and only 4 pinged his Evildar? Wouldn’t that, like, invalidate their whole world view?

…and then I found out he meant he can Detect Good Woman, instead. Seesh. Don’t know why I thought it was the other way around, considering who we’re talking about.

Oh and David why aren’t you spending your valuable journalistic time covering the Sequatchie Twine Balling Competition? It’s a much more important issue than (s)p-a:n(c), and I get to say, because I’m just some guy on the Internet.

ozymandias42
12 years ago

Feminists who like spanking must blow his mind.

marc2020
marc2020
12 years ago

Dudes a delusional social inadequate and… ah you know what just fuck not going to do this to myself one more day till new Doctor Who.

Graham
12 years ago

That forum is lovely. First topic in the “Rants & Raves” section: “10 reasons I hate black people”.

Although further down I did find this:

TOPIC: You talk to a girl online, next day she deletes her account

“This has happened to me a few times.

I’m on OkCupid and Plenty of Fish, interacting with these godawful American women (most are so terrifyingly boring, incapable of conversation or any measure of curiosity — let alone the ability to be flirtatious — then again, I realize they are bombarded with messages from all the desperate guys they ignore in real life!).

Sometimes I strike up a conversation, albeit often a shallow one, and sometimes there seems like a connection, and WHAM — the next day she’s DELETED her account.

Are they really THAT schizo?”

😀

darksidecat
12 years ago

Ew, that bit about the daughter came off as suggesting sexual abuse as well as physical abuse.

thebionicmommy
thebionicmommy
12 years ago

Peter-Andrew: Nolan (c) is so terrible, even the Spearhead banned him. I wonder how long it will be until the Happier Abroad jerks ban him, too. It’s only a matter of time.

ozymandias42
12 years ago

Graham: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 😀

DSC: At this point I think the sexual abuse subtext is… text. Gee, I wonder why he doesn’t have contact with his kids…

speedlines
speedlines
12 years ago

“AT LAST…..a man who really knows what we are like….that makes me feel so much better because I do not have to worry about trying to present myself as I am not…..you already really know what we are like!”

Peter Andrew Nolan (c) has an amazing ability to find women who talk exactly like him.

sabresguy5
sabresguy5
12 years ago

“it is completely normal for a girl to want to provoke her father into needing to spank her, once he does she knows he is big and strong and will protect her and provide for her….she feel more comfortable, more secure, and she will often cuddle up to her father and feel very good towards him after being spanked….my daughter did that all the time…..I bet you did that with your father too….

EW WHAT THE HELL

Naira
Naira
12 years ago

This is where I have a fundamental world-view break with these people: why the hell should something that you enjoy, agree with, or otherwise like suddenly need to be the TRUTH for everyone else?

Well…I know why: they need to make this the TRUTH for everyone, rather than their own thing, so they can justify the terrible things they want to do. It isn’t TERRIBLE to drag your screaming wife over your knee and spank her why she shouts “No! Stop!” It’s BONDING. Everyone knows that. /sarcasm

I guess an appreciation of diversity is a luxury of those who don’t need to justify doing cruel things to each other.

leftwingfox
12 years ago

Just when I thought I’d gotten numb to conservatives passing off their BDSM kinks as universal traits to build society upon, I get Incest McPaddler trying to paint himself as the ideal. Lovely. *hurkHurkHairball*

polliwog16
polliwog16
12 years ago

“if you are naughty I will put you over my knee and spank you”..to which she replied “and I shall be naughty to make sure I am spanked”.

Sure, sounds like fairly commonplace, consensual kinky fun. Good for you, PAN(c)! I’m glad you’ve found a way to indulge your sexual desires without making them creepy as shi-

my daughter did that all the time…..I bet you did that with your father too…..

GAAAAH. NO. NO NO NO.

Falconer
12 years ago

Speaking of bad bondage & discipline, YouTube is trying to sell me Fifty Shades of Grey: The Classical Album.

E. L. James: Look at your life. Look at your choices.

Falconer
12 years ago

Of course, her choices have made her mad bank. So there you go.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

P-A:N(c): Still putting the “terrible” in “really fucking terrible.”

dualityheart
dualityheart
12 years ago

Our daughter woke up a bit fussy with what we like to call “the big lip”- when a kid lets their bottom lip hang out all exaggeratedly in a pout.

She immediately wanted to be held by me and then, as I was on my way out the door, she put her arms up and said “daddy!” and glommed on like a little monkey.

We have never spanked our child, yet she is fully secure with us and feels safe to act out and receive our guidance. She will lovingly run her fingers over our arms to self soothe when she is upset. We are both trusted comfort people for her.

And, fancy that, we did not have to resort to physical abuse!

And yes, my parents spanked me from time to time as a child. It made me feel powerless, afraid and untrusting with them. Whenever I had problems, I would hide them because of feat of punishment, even if they might have been able to help me. My parents established a relationship based on control and ownership of me. I cannot consider them allies in my life because of this, and it tears me up inside when I see my friends who have loving, trusted parents.

Viscaria
Viscaria
12 years ago

Also, I have close and meaningful relationships with both of my fathers, and neither of them ever abused me, you evil piece of scum. They also both got to see me as I was growing up, and I continue to see them now. Gee, I wonder if there’s some sort of connection there.

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