Men’s Rights Activists, I hate to have to break the news to you, but Roosh V, the rapey pickup guru I’ve been writing about a lot lately, is very disappointed in you and your so-called activism. In a sort-of followup to a post of his from several years back with the self-explanatory title “Men’s Rights Has Become A Euphemism For Sexual Loser,” Roosh lays into the “manginas” of the Men’s Rights movement, which he says isn’t really worthy of the name.
The biggest problem with MRAs is that they are not activists. They are pamphleteers. … They believe that one-thousand of them typing away and producing ten-thousand blog posts will change society. … [But] their movement hasn’t produced any results, only little online playgrounds where sad boys can sit in the sandbox and helplessly watch girls play with the cocky boys who understand the rules of the game.
He’s just getting going:
What political or social change have the men’s rights pamphleteers brought? Say MRP in one syllable. That’s the sound they make every time they sit down and hit publish on another one of their turd rants, giddy at the prospect of changing the world when a cup of strong coffee accomplishes more change to their actual turds. … They get the occasional snarky mention from Jezebel and think they’re accomplishing something when they’re actually being used as nothing more than fodder for female bemusement or page views … Even the feminists, their supposed mortal enemy, refuse to debate them on equal footing.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they go back to mostly ignoring you, with occasional time-outs for laughter.
Our dear friend Paul Elam gets a little namecheck:
The entire men’s rights non-movement can be boiled down to one middle-aged man named Paul Elam who is carrying the weight of a thousand pamphleteers on his suffering shoulders. That’s not activism, that’s following one dude’s blog. The difference they think they’re making by cheering the public outing of false rape accusers or “male shamers” is the same difference my sister makes when she reads an article in Cosmo.
Aw. I don’t think Elam is really going to appreciate having his blog compared to Cosmo. Just keep telling yourself: Any publicity is good publicity.
But wait a minute, you might find yourself saying, isn’t Roosh just a blogger himself? What possible difference has he made for the men of the world?
Ah, but Roosh has anticipated this objection, and so sets out explicitly what makes him different, and better, than the “sad boys” of the MR(non)M: Roosh fucks ladies who aren’t fat.
As he puts it:
I take personal action and encourage other men to do the same.
At the same time I was complaining that American girls are fat, I was blasting inside Polish girls with perfect bodies. I tell men how to sleep with such women.
At the same time I was whining about divorce rape, I was dating a Ukrainian girl who treated me like a king. I tell other men where to find women like her.
In Ukraine, perhaps?
And while Roosh improves the lives of men with the power of his penis, he is also doing his part to rescue the economy from its doldrums:
At the same time I complain that the American economy is in trouble, I was completing another book I knew my readers would like so that I could increase my income.
That’s right, selling ebooks to make yourself some cash is apparently the highest form of activism.
But he’s not done:
At the same time I was ranting against the Skrillex haircut, I was banging a Lithuanian girl whose hair belonged in a Vidal Sassoon shampoo commercial. I tell men how feminine women are like.
We commend Roosh for his courage and his humility, and his humanity-bettering strategy of pressuring drunk women into bed. Soon the Skrillex haircut will be nothing more than a scary memory.
But Roosh isn’t done with the Men’s Rightsers just yet. While he sets out to better himself and his penis, Roosh complains, the Men’s Rightsers want everything handed to them on a government-issue silver platter,
hoping the government will one day serve their interests and give them things that me and my readers are achieving on their own. I don’t need the government to pass laws against alimony. I simply won’t marry in the USA. I don’t need the government to pass laws promoting fair child custody laws. I won’t impregnate an America girl. I don’t need the government to increase punishment for false rape accusers. I’ll cover my own back. I don’t need the government to ban trans fat to lower the weight of the population. I’ll go to Poland.
What a hero! He continues:
In the same breath they call me a pussy beggar, they beg the government for protection from pussy.
That line is strangely Kennedyesque in its eloquence: “Beg not for what pussy your government can protect your from … .”
Before winding up his inspiring little manifesto, Roosh manages to namecheck a certain middle-aged Men’s Rightser once again:
Instead of listening to Paul Elam tell me that men are getting fucked, I will step out of the house and find a girl who wants to get fucked by me. … [MRAs] use their illusionary movement as an excuse to sit on their ass and be a loser at life.
I guess we’ll just have to wait to see if Elam takes the bait.
NOTE: If you’re a Redditor (I won’t hold it against you), could you upvote this post here? It would be much appreciated.
Not terribly related, but seeing as we’re all big kitty fans here – does anyone else have a cat who loves tofu? One of mine prefers to go for my brother’s vegetarian noodle concoction rather than the fried chicken the rest of my family has when we have takeaway chicken and it’s really amusing.
So…
On the one hand, we have “Women are terrible.” They spermjack and friendzone like nobody’s business. If they can’t trick some poor schlub to pay for their new shoes (it’s not like they would want to do actual work, right? Oh yeah, women shouldn’t be allowed to hold a job…), they’ll just get the government to pay for them. Just make sure never to have kids, since as quick as a wink they’ll run you through divorce court and have you paying for child support til the end of time.
Whores to everyone but me, all women everywhere are the same. Except those foreign girls. They’re nice and submissive, and know how to treat a man right.
On the other hand, we have “Women are horrible.” They gold-dig and shit-test like nobody’s business. What’s a guy gotta do to get laid around here, anyway? If they aren’t spreading VD’s to every man unfortunate enough to gain access to the magical vagina, women are dead-set on only having sex with the alpha-est of alphas, screw the poor beta who only ever just wanted to make his penis smile.
Whores to anyone who knows the secret code, women are all the same. Except those foreign girls. They’re nice and submissive, and know how to treat a man right.
It’s the war of the century, between to idealogues who couldn’t be any more different. Don’t miss it!
@Snowy
I had an ex who used to check his phone while we were cuddling, and once, memorably, mid-sex. I wasn’t impressed but didn’t really know what to do. So it’s possible, but yeah, reeeeal awkward.
@lowquacks, Not tofu, but mine love mushrooms. And I have a friend whose cat goes crazy for green bell peppers.
“Typing on his computer while having sex” says “sex toy” rather than “actual live person” to me. (Do they make sex toys in Poland? Might be what all that codology about Polish women was about.)
Snowy, you win the prize for Most Realistic Kitty Barfing Effect.
This one is particularly funny to me. Yeah, you guys would totally kick Angelina Jolie out of bed. We believe you, honest!
Also, today there was some guy hitting on me at the grocery store (hilariously – he instigated a suggestive conversation about melons in the produce section). When is this transformation into an unfuckable she-beast meant to happen, exactly? Because I’ll be 39 in a few days.
@lowquacks, I’ve never tried tofu so don’t know if my two would go for it, but I have had kits who loved frozen chips.
@CassandraSays
Yeah. I’m a legal adult prettymuch anywhere and Christina Hendricks, Official Hottie du Jour (TM), is on the lower end of “old enough to be my mother”, so…
What’s the bet that these people assume that their wisdom is true, guess that anyone they think is hot is under 25, and so reinforce that idea?
@KittehServant
You’re an Aussie, aren’t you? I’ve yet to find a cat who doesn’t like Vegemite. I can’t understand why anyone would like it, but cats certainly do. Possibly a lots-of-salt thing.
@lowquacks,
Yeah, I’m an Aussie! Most of my kits have loved Vegemite. So do I. The trick is to Not Slather It On Like Peanut Butter, something I have to tell my American friends slowly and carefully (and I’ve even won converts, heheh).
Did you see the film clip from when the PM visited America a while back, and she and the President were in a school? One kid asked the inevitable question about Vegemite. Ms G said “Well, I love it, but …” and gestured toward Mr O, who said “It’s HORRIBLE!” 😀
My cat likes potatoes
Mashed, boiled, roast, fried? (Scientific enquiry here.)
Lowquacks, we’ve had 4 cats since we became vegetarians and we always joke that one of the good things about it is that they’re not interested in our food. The only people food any of them like is cornflakes and popcorn. Oh, and nutritional yeast. Nilla especially loves the nooch. I don’t buy it often but when I do I have to put it up immediately because he’ll find it in the grocery bag and chew right through the plastic to get it. Fortunately, it’s good for cats, so whenever I cook with it, I give them some on their dry food.
@KittehServant
I’m not sure who Mr O might be (probably someone very obvious I’ve overlooked), and I’ll never like Vegemite, ever EVERRRRRRR.
Guys, guys, guys…. I almost agree with Roosh on something. I…I think I need a drink. Or twelve. Help!
@hellkell
When cooking popcorn on a stove, you’re supposed to put just enough of the oil of your choice to cover the bottom of the pot, turn the burner on to medium-high, leaning towards high, and put three kernels at the bottom of the pot, once those three pop, add about a third of a cup to a cup of popcorn kernels depending on how many people you’re serving, at this point you’ll want to stay with the pot until you hear the popping noises start to slow, once they do, voila you have your popcorn.
I dunno about tofu, Youtube advises me that cats love watermelon
You have to turn the volume up so you can hear his adorable little chomps
To be fair, I’ve done the “typing while having sex” thing a couple times. But it was always a joke with my partner, not a joke on them.
Big difference between “ha ha, we’re having sex in front of the whole Internet, go us” and “ha ha, I care about you so little you’re going to service me while I play on the Internet.”
I dunno about cats, but my neighbor’s dog loves vegetables. Especially green beans. She was obedience trained entirely with green beans for a reward.
…She also once tore apart our compost bin to get at those delightful rotting vegetables.
I’ve known a few cats that really liked tomato sauce. And not just the kind with meat, either.
@rjjspesh
Watermelon kitteh is adorable!
@Cliff, I’m not sure what happened with me was like that. I have all sorts of complicated thoughts W/R/T dude in question probably not best resolved in internet comments on entirely unrelated articles.
Lowquacks – Mr O is Mr Obama, sorry!
What annoys me about Roosh (among many things) is how he uses the term “value” all of the time. “This is a low value thread” or “I am a high value man” or “don’t leave comments that bring no value to the conversation. It’s ridiculous.
Aside from the list of shitthatneverhappened.txt he’s right about mras being nothing but humour fodder
On cats and nummies, my furball of evil apparently loves cooked spinach. She’s never shown an interest in people food, as long as she’s got food she doesn’t care what we eat. But a couple days ago I accidentally dropped some spinach I was sauteing on the floor. She sniffed it, batted it a minute, then gulped it down. Then followed me around the kitchen complaining for the next hour.