Categories
alpha asshole cock carousel alpha males bad boys beta males evo psych fairy tales heartiste MGTOW misogyny PUA worst writing in the history of the universe

Yo, dudes: Alpha males are a myth, according to actual experts on wolves

Manosphere misogynists like to tell themselves fairy tales about women. Their favorite such tale, repeated endlessly, is one called “The Cock Carousel” – sometimes referred to in expanded form as the “Alpha Asshole Cock Carousel” or the “Bad Boy Cock Carousel.” (Hence that Rooster-riding gal you see in this blog’s header about half the time.)

Despite the different names, the story is always, monotonously, the same: In their late teens and twenties, when they’re at the height of their sexual appeal, women (or at least the overwhelming majority of them) have sex in rapid succession with an assortment of charismatic but unreliable alpha males and “bad boys” who make their vaginas (or just ‘ginas) tingle. Then, sometime in their mid-to-late twenties, these women “hit the wall,” with their so-called sexual market value (or SMV) dropping faster than Facebook’s stock price. As Roissy/Heartiste puts it, in his typically overheated prose:

So sad, so tragic, the inevitable slide into sexual worthlessness that accompanies women, the withering tick tock of the cosmic clock stripping their beauty in flayed bits of soulletting mignons like psychological ling chi. A sadistic thief in the night etching, billowing, draping and sagging a new affront to her most preciously guarded asset.

While many women try to pretend they’ve still “got it,” even at the ripe old age of thirty, they inevitably have to either get off or get thrown off the “cock carousel.” At this point the more savvy women glom onto some convenient “beta male” who, while somewhat lacking in sexual appeal, will at least be a good husband and provider for them – and in many cases the children they’ve had with alpha male seed. Those women who don’t accept the new reality are destined to end up alone and childless, surrounded by cats.

To borrow the phrase South Park used in its episodes about Scientology and Mormonism, this is what manosphere men actually believe. Not only that, but they claim that this fairy tale is based on real science.

So who are these mysterious alpha males that get the women so excited? As one guide to pickup artist (PUA) lingo puts it:

In animal hierarchies, the Alpha Male is the most dominant, and typically the physically strongest member of the group. For example, in wolf packs, the “alpha wolf” is the strongest member of the pack, and is the leader of the group. This position of leadership is often achieved by killing or defeating the previous Alpha Male in combat. Alpha wolves have first access to food as well as mating privileges with the females of the pack.

Social status among human social groups is less rigidly defined than in the animal kingdom, but there are some recognizable parallels. Although people don’t often engage in physical violence to achieve dominance, there are still recognizable leaders in different fields who have wide access to material resources and women.

Because the qualities of the Alpha Male (such as social dominance and leadership) are attractive to women, many PUAs have adopted these ideals as models of emulation. In fact, the term “alpha” has come be shorthand for the qualities of an attractive man, and it is a common refrain among PUAs to be “more alpha” or to “out alpha” competitors.

There’s a certain logic to all this. But unfortunately for the PUAs and other manospherians the notion of the Alpha male is based on bad science. The notion of Alpha dominance, as the definition above notes, came originally from studies of wolf packs. Even if we assume that wolf behavior is somehow a good model upon which to base our understanding of human romance  – as manosphere men and evolutionary psychologists tend to do – the science behind the Alpha male wolf has now come completely undone, with many of those who promulgated the theory in the first place decades ago now explicitly repudiating it.

The problem, you see, is that the studies underlying the notion of the alpha male wolf, who aggressively asserts his dominance over beta males in order to rule the pack, were all based on observations of wolves in captivity. In the real world, wolf packs don’t work that way at all. Most wolf packs are basically wolf families, with a breeding pair and their pups. When male pups reach adulthood, they don’t fight their fathers for dominance — they go out and start their own families.

As noted wolf behavior expert L. David Mech, one of those who helped to establish and popularize the notion of the alpha wolf in the first place, explains on his website:

The concept of the alpha wolf is well ingrained in the popular wolf literature at least partly because of my book “The Wolf: Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species,” written in 1968, published in 1970, republished in paperback in 1981, and currently still in print, despite my numerous pleas to the publisher to stop publishing it. Although most of the book’s info is still accurate, much is outdated. We have learned more about wolves in the last 40 years then in all of previous history.

One of the outdated pieces of information is the concept of the alpha wolf. “Alpha” implies competing with others and becoming top dog by winning a contest or battle. However, most wolves who lead packs achieved their position simply by mating and producing pups, which then became their pack. In other words they are merely breeders, or parents, and that’s all we call them today, the “breeding male,” “breeding female,” or “male parent,” “female parent,” or the “adult male” or “adult female.” In the rare packs that include more than one breeding animal, the “dominant breeder” can be called that, and any breeding daughter can be called a “subordinate breeder.”

So the dominant male wolves – those whom manosphere dudes would still call the alphas – achieve this position not by being sexy badasses but simply by siring and taking responsibility for pups. To use the terminology in the manner of manosphere dudes, alphas become alphas by acting like betas. That’s right: alphas are betas. (For more of the details, see this paper by Mech; it’s in pdf form.)

Also, they’re wolves and not humans, but that’s a whole other kettle of anthropomorphized fish.

997 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

Actual wat.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Angkor Wat!

Viscaria
Viscaria
10 years ago

I gave it a very careful second read and I still have no idea what’s going on there.

kittehserf
10 years ago

Well, duder’s go No Clue either, so you’re not alone. 😛

neuroticbeagle
10 years ago

@kittehs

::snort::

kittehserf
10 years ago

😉

Shiraz
Shiraz
10 years ago

Um, what? This stuff here:

“I think it’s a simple matter of a woman being excited to be around a man, and excited BY him and excited (moreso) by the fact he WANTS her.”

Uh-huh.

“A beta’s NEED for a woman and NEED to serve her might lure her in…”

Serve? Like, what? Breakfast in bed? He covers puddles with his coat so her feet don’t get wet? Is there a modern idea of serving someone in a relationship that doesn’t sound so corny and dated, perhaps? ‘Cause otherwise…I’m giving the side eye.

“… but I think this feminine energy is the same energy that ends up driving her away.”

Waaaa? Feminine energy equals wanting to “serve”? Eww. Icky.

“Conversely, the Alpha’s initially attractive features may also drive a woman away if he’s got character defects or other problems that devalue him more than his alphaness is worth.”

Oh wait, I see your problem…you think dated studies about wolves’ pack mentality have something to do with actual humans.

” I am drawn to the male/female chi-balance kind of concept.”

The Yin and the Yang balance? OK.

“Women find female attributes attractive because by their very nature, nurturing and sensitivity are *nice*, but are they what women want on a more primal level?”

You can’t know exactly what every woman walking the Earth wants. It’s impossible. Your theory is also cliche. I’m not 100 percent on this, but when you say, women may want something differently on a “primal level,” you’re talking about macho caveman shit, aren’t you? **eyeroll**

“Nice guys do finish last.”

Citation?

“Except nice handsome, wealthy, successful and confident men. They finish first all the time.”

Um, did they finish first because maybe they’re confident and secure? Is this a mind-bending observation?

I dunno, whatever.

Bina
Bina
10 years ago

Wat wat in the butt.

kittehserf
10 years ago

“Nice guys do finish last.”

Citation?

Falconer said so, yesterday!

Okay, he was talking about in bed.

“Except nice handsome, wealthy, successful and confident men. They finish first all the time.”

Nice, handsome, wealthy, successful and confident men are all premature ejaculators? Wow.

I wonder if all this beta = serving and caring = feminine = something women don’t really want isn’t just the standard put-down of all things seen as female, but a handy-dandy excuse for scumbag men who don’t give a shit about others and don’t want to. Care for someone, look after them, enjoy their company, desire them, want to be around them? Nosiree, that’s way too much to ask. Call it girly stuff, then nobody will expect it of you.

Fuckers.

Am I the only one who loathes the whole yin-yang thing because it is so very sexist?

cloudiah
10 years ago

Am I the only one who loathes the whole yin-yang thing because it is so very sexist?

Nope!

kittehserf
10 years ago

Good, I didn’t think I would be.

We need a better system. Kit-cat maybe?

grumpycatisagirl
10 years ago

Umm . . . did this joeblow person come in last month to ask “Why is everyone making personal attacks against me?” on this thread over a year after anyone even said anything at all to him?

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

Yin and yang is sexist? Binary, I get, but sexist?

Shiraz
Shiraz
10 years ago

No, not sexist if you follow Chinese alchemy especially.

sexyconfidentwoman
sexyconfidentwoman
10 years ago

There is no such thing as a alpha it is an excuse that men use when they can’t be bothered to work on their own personal development and would rather say I don’t express my feelings because I am a man.

joeblow
joeblow
10 years ago

Almost every man I have seen in my life who is in a relationship with a woman has gotten a very bad deal, women appreciate nothing. The alpha – beta shit does not matter. Anyway, I think most of these guys who are into pua or follow the alpha stuff must be bigger losers than me because I can get laid without much difficulty, almost anyone can. There are so many promiscuous and unselective women out there I cant see how any man would have difficult y getting laid unless he had major birth defects or was totally out of his mind and was unable to stop talking to himself for even a few hours. Even if a guy is hideous but able to hold a job he is probably sane enough to find a slut to fuck. There is no reason for any man not to be able to get laid without much difficulty in this age of promiscuity.
How does this relate to the article? The guys who believe this stuff are suckers who believe whatever they read online. I think women have no value beyond their sexual and reproductive role and that if it was not for sex they would be killed at birth but getting laid is pretty easy, especially in a big city. If looks are all that matters, all a man has to do is go up to a lot of hot women and one will fuck him, no matter what he looks like. There may be cases of men who are so fucked up that they cant do this but they are rare. Women give it away a lot more freely than they care to admit.
Fortunately for myself and the female gender that no matter what a woman looks like I lose interest in her minutes after she opens her dirty mouth. Girlfriends are for suckers, wives are for fools and casual sex is not worth the effort or putting up with the rotten personalities that almost all women have.
As far as a woman’s appearance goes, I never used to care much because I believed that women had some other value besides their stink hole but they don’t, a man might as well get the youngest hottest woman he can find if he is stupid enough to give into his sex drive because nearly all women are worthless.
P.S. I do not mean to offend anyone. I am just trying enlighten people about how some men see women, once they remove their rose colored glasses, see beyond a woman’s sexuality and lies and see what she really is, a bitch, a slut and whore with no redeeming qualities.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

. I think women have no value beyond their sexual and reproductive role and that if it was not for sex they would be killed at birth

Your mother must be so proud.

Fortunately for myself and the female gender that no matter what a woman looks like I lose interest in her minutes after she opens her dirty mouth.

Fuck off.

I do not mean to offend anyone. I am just trying enlighten people about how some men see women, once they remove their rose colored glasses, see beyond a woman’s sexuality and lies and see what she really is, a bitch, a slut and whore with no redeeming qualities.

Riiiiight, sure. So you “enlighten” by trotting out all the tired, worn-out tropes about women.

Joe, go blow yourself. Why do I think the only way you could get laid is by crawling up a chicken’s ass and waiting?

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
10 years ago

I think women have no value beyond their sexual and reproductive role

I do not mean to offend anyone.

One of these statements is not true. Fuck off, necrotroll.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
10 years ago

I don’t mean to offend you, joeblow, but I think you’re rather less intelligent than the keyboard I’m typing these words on, and that therefore you should shut your pie-hole. I also suspect that the cartoon stink-lines of misogyny that waft forth from you probably cause most women to avoid you like you were a week-old pizza with mold growing on it.

I do hope this doesn’t make you feel that I’m being rude.

weirwoodtreehugger
10 years ago

Wow. That was the most hateful thing I’ve seen a troll write since I started commenting here. That really says something.

I know lots of straight guys who are very happy in their relationships you stupid troll. Maybe the problem is that you and your friends are all assholes and don’t know how to relate to other humans?

sparky
sparky
10 years ago

joeblow:

You are a horrible, horrible person.

That is all.

hellkell
hellkell
10 years ago

It’s rare that they come right out and say women should be killed, and if it were up them we would be if it weren’t for sex. Joe’s outright awfulness is almost refreshing after the mealy-mouthed troll tapdancing we usually get.

Brooked
Brooked
10 years ago

P.S. I do not mean to offend anyone.

P.S. No one takes you seriousy.

Fortunately for myself and the female gender that no matter what a woman looks like I lose interest in her minutes after she opens her dirty mouth.

I’d say that’s very fortunate, the less you speak to women the more everybody wins.

1 18 19 20 21 22 40