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The Thinking Housewife: Olympic women athletes too athletic

Sure, America’s women athletes may have taken home a whopping 29 gold medals, but over on The Thinking Housewife, Laura Wood is pissed off at them – and the rest of the Olympic women — for being so, well, athletic.

In a recent post, Wood rushes to the defense of a Turkish newspaper columnist who complained about the “broad-shouldered, flat-chested women” who were destroying Womanhood with their mannish, muscular bodies. Alas, wrote Yuksel Aytug, even their “breasts – the symbol of womanhood, motherhood – [were] flattened into stubs as they were seen as mere hindrances to speed.” Curse you, sports bras!

Seriously, in future Olympics, female athletes should face mandatory deductions for every cup size less than C.

Wood adds her own two cents:

A man who dares to say what every normal person has been thinking when confronted with the muscle-bound female gladiators at the games and what soft, effeminate Western men would not dare articulate, Aytug has been attacked for his remarks throughout the Western world. He is tiresomely accused of misogyny. In fact, judging from these words, he is an admirer of women, a courageous defender of them.

Or at least of their tits.

The Olympic Games are anti-woman. They require female athletes to ape men in grotesque ways. They compromise female fertility and modesty. They promote the idea that aggression and competitiveness in women are normal and healthy. They debase not just women athletes but womanhood throughout the world.

Well, I suppose Wood can take solace in the fact that the “muscle-bound” bodies of these “female gladiators” didn’t stop the Pedophile – sorry, Ephebophile – Army of Reddit from perving on McKayla Maroney and the rest of the US Women’s Gymnastics team.

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Falconer
12 years ago

@creativewritingstudent: I’ve come to realize the joke doesn’t work with anything other than the kind of stylized caricature of women that the cartoon has. Not that “she’s ahead by a breast!” is a very funny joke, but it requires an unserious portrayal of women athletes because it’s about pandering to het men.

So of course they’ve got ballet shoes on, and have sawn off their toes, and generally look like they’ve been inflated. Actual anatomical representation would harsh the glow for the (het male) reader.

Falconer
12 years ago

Not to mention their bubble butts and their frozen, zombie expressions.

darksidecat
12 years ago

Remember, if something compromises your fertility, it makes you less of a woman, because the only value of a woman is her worth as a baby factory.

Buttman
Buttman
12 years ago

Calling guys paedos because they find a 16 year old attractive is a little ridiculous. I guess Taylor Swift is a paedo because she was with the twilight and Kennedy kid before they were 18. Perhaps the female athletes could stop wearing next to nothing and maybe we would focus on their accomplishments instead of appearance.

Falconer
12 years ago

Oh! And the cartoon is about framing women athletes as unserious.

See? It’s just shit all the way down, and it’s not worth my time.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
12 years ago

Wow, and thought it was mostly amurcan dudes who were obsessed with “tits”! A lot of female athletes, especially volleyball players and figure skaters, have gorgeous Booty’s.:) The whole idea of breasts as a symbol of womanhood seems to be very much a white nordic thing. Black and Latino culture almost never acknowledges womens chest and emphasizes the female posterior. But hey, I aint talking bout playboy, cuz silicone parts are made for toys!

howardbann1ster
12 years ago

Hey, MSN, you missed my response to your post the other day. Or you ignored it.

Any comment?

kristinmh
kristinmh
12 years ago

This is what happens when you read too much Vision Forum crap and manage to convince yourself that it’s 1890.

(No, exercise/education/politics does NOT make women infertile. Sheesh.)

And good point, darksidecat.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
12 years ago

Please repost your response howardbann1ster, and I’ll be happy to reply.

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

NWO, stop yammering about Marxism (which you know jack about). The grown-ups are talking about athletes, along with what a complete toolshed the Thinking Housewife is.

Sharculese
12 years ago

yeah, owlslave, ‘tits’ is a western value. that makes sense.

Falconer
12 years ago

“Tits” is a Western value — which is why, before the western Allies reconstructed their infrastructure in the 50s, Japanese women walked around topless all the time. Uh huh.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
12 years ago

You know what I like (hah) about Owly? He’s repetitive, but at least he changes his repetitions entirely once in a while.

Zanana
Zanana
12 years ago

If she’s really made such miraculous peace with the unfairness of her situation, why does she need to evangelize about it so stridently? Why does everyone else have to live a sad, unfair life, too? You’d think antifeminist women would be content to have cornered the market on their special brand of downtrodden joy, and wouldn’t be so eager to convert everyone else so we can all compete to be under the thumbs of the same twelve SUPER ALPHA dudes.

Zanana
Zanana
12 years ago

This is the same thing I don’t get about Susan Walsh. If your conservative life is so grand, why not hide it away for yourself and your friends? What investment do you have in me subscribing to your lifestyle?

Freitag
Freitag
12 years ago

Oh goody, the marxists and their critical theory are out in full force.

Here: Just for you.

Oh goody, the marxists and their critical theory are out in full force.

howardbann1ster
12 years ago

Hmm, yes, I see that the link didn’t work.

Dammit. I’ll be right back.

Stupid kids and their stupid interwebs… HOW DOES IT WORK? IS IT MAGIC??

Freitag
Freitag
12 years ago

Crap. I broke the Internet.

Here’s the link:

Sharculese
12 years ago

criticizing something is marxist, unless that something is an immodestly dressed woman or a homosexual.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
12 years ago

So if a woman pumps iron it undermines the purpose of her body, makes her less womanly.

Well, it certainly does cause a decrease in estrogen and many women body builders who continue to pump iron cease having periods altogether. The word “womanly” is rather subjective so I wont comment on someone else’s personal opinion. But men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

howardbann1ster
12 years ago

MSN, I’m sorry you feel your body is inferior to a woman’s body.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
12 years ago

MSN, I’m sorry you feel your body is inferior to a woman’s body.

Ahhhh…….the sour grapes fallacy!

The ‘purpose’ of someones body is that which the person living in that body gives to it. I don’t by that bullshit that a woman’s body has the “purpose” of bearing children.

katz
12 years ago

Ahhhh…….the sour grapes fallacy!

Code purple!

howardbann1ster
12 years ago

men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

You said.

Not equal.

NOT EQUAL.

Also… sour grapes fallacy? Um, can you elucidate? Is it commonly known by another name? It doesn’t seem to be on my list of common logical fallacies.

TheMcGee
TheMcGee
12 years ago

many women body builders who continue to pump iron cease having periods altogether.

Having your period != being “womanly”. Sometimes when I get really really stressed I miss periods. And some women just stop having them altogether when they reach a certain age. And some women just don’t get them for other reasons. And some women have them intermittently naturally. And some women work out a ton and still get them. And sometimes weightlifting won’t affect the menstrual cycle but running a certain number of miles a week will. Good grief, you seriously don’t know that there are all kinds of different people and there is no “one way” for people to be (woman or not).

But men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

And not all men are physically equal. And not all women are physically equal. And not all people are physically equal. Damn! Hmmm. I think I’m sensing a pattern. You’d think people were individuals or something.