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The Thinking Housewife: Olympic women athletes too athletic

Sure, America’s women athletes may have taken home a whopping 29 gold medals, but over on The Thinking Housewife, Laura Wood is pissed off at them – and the rest of the Olympic women — for being so, well, athletic.

In a recent post, Wood rushes to the defense of a Turkish newspaper columnist who complained about the “broad-shouldered, flat-chested women” who were destroying Womanhood with their mannish, muscular bodies. Alas, wrote Yuksel Aytug, even their “breasts – the symbol of womanhood, motherhood – [were] flattened into stubs as they were seen as mere hindrances to speed.” Curse you, sports bras!

Seriously, in future Olympics, female athletes should face mandatory deductions for every cup size less than C.

Wood adds her own two cents:

A man who dares to say what every normal person has been thinking when confronted with the muscle-bound female gladiators at the games and what soft, effeminate Western men would not dare articulate, Aytug has been attacked for his remarks throughout the Western world. He is tiresomely accused of misogyny. In fact, judging from these words, he is an admirer of women, a courageous defender of them.

Or at least of their tits.

The Olympic Games are anti-woman. They require female athletes to ape men in grotesque ways. They compromise female fertility and modesty. They promote the idea that aggression and competitiveness in women are normal and healthy. They debase not just women athletes but womanhood throughout the world.

Well, I suppose Wood can take solace in the fact that the “muscle-bound” bodies of these “female gladiators” didn’t stop the Pedophile – sorry, Ephebophile – Army of Reddit from perving on McKayla Maroney and the rest of the US Women’s Gymnastics team.

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Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

@creativewritingstudent: I’ve come to realize the joke doesn’t work with anything other than the kind of stylized caricature of women that the cartoon has. Not that “she’s ahead by a breast!” is a very funny joke, but it requires an unserious portrayal of women athletes because it’s about pandering to het men.

So of course they’ve got ballet shoes on, and have sawn off their toes, and generally look like they’ve been inflated. Actual anatomical representation would harsh the glow for the (het male) reader.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Not to mention their bubble butts and their frozen, zombie expressions.

darksidecat
8 years ago

Remember, if something compromises your fertility, it makes you less of a woman, because the only value of a woman is her worth as a baby factory.

Buttman
Buttman
8 years ago

Calling guys paedos because they find a 16 year old attractive is a little ridiculous. I guess Taylor Swift is a paedo because she was with the twilight and Kennedy kid before they were 18. Perhaps the female athletes could stop wearing next to nothing and maybe we would focus on their accomplishments instead of appearance.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Oh! And the cartoon is about framing women athletes as unserious.

See? It’s just shit all the way down, and it’s not worth my time.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
8 years ago

Wow, and thought it was mostly amurcan dudes who were obsessed with “tits”! A lot of female athletes, especially volleyball players and figure skaters, have gorgeous Booty’s.:) The whole idea of breasts as a symbol of womanhood seems to be very much a white nordic thing. Black and Latino culture almost never acknowledges womens chest and emphasizes the female posterior. But hey, I aint talking bout playboy, cuz silicone parts are made for toys!

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

Hey, MSN, you missed my response to your post the other day. Or you ignored it.

Any comment?

kristinmh
kristinmh
8 years ago

This is what happens when you read too much Vision Forum crap and manage to convince yourself that it’s 1890.

(No, exercise/education/politics does NOT make women infertile. Sheesh.)

And good point, darksidecat.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
8 years ago

Please repost your response howardbann1ster, and I’ll be happy to reply.

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

NWO, stop yammering about Marxism (which you know jack about). The grown-ups are talking about athletes, along with what a complete toolshed the Thinking Housewife is.

Sharculese
8 years ago

yeah, owlslave, ‘tits’ is a western value. that makes sense.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

“Tits” is a Western value — which is why, before the western Allies reconstructed their infrastructure in the 50s, Japanese women walked around topless all the time. Uh huh.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

You know what I like (hah) about Owly? He’s repetitive, but at least he changes his repetitions entirely once in a while.

Zanana
Zanana
8 years ago

If she’s really made such miraculous peace with the unfairness of her situation, why does she need to evangelize about it so stridently? Why does everyone else have to live a sad, unfair life, too? You’d think antifeminist women would be content to have cornered the market on their special brand of downtrodden joy, and wouldn’t be so eager to convert everyone else so we can all compete to be under the thumbs of the same twelve SUPER ALPHA dudes.

Zanana
Zanana
8 years ago

This is the same thing I don’t get about Susan Walsh. If your conservative life is so grand, why not hide it away for yourself and your friends? What investment do you have in me subscribing to your lifestyle?

Freitag
Freitag
8 years ago

Oh goody, the marxists and their critical theory are out in full force.

Here: Just for you.

Oh goody, the marxists and their critical theory are out in full force.

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

Hmm, yes, I see that the link didn’t work.

Dammit. I’ll be right back.

Stupid kids and their stupid interwebs… HOW DOES IT WORK? IS IT MAGIC??

Freitag
Freitag
8 years ago

Crap. I broke the Internet.

Here’s the link:

Sharculese
8 years ago

criticizing something is marxist, unless that something is an immodestly dressed woman or a homosexual.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
8 years ago

So if a woman pumps iron it undermines the purpose of her body, makes her less womanly.

Well, it certainly does cause a decrease in estrogen and many women body builders who continue to pump iron cease having periods altogether. The word “womanly” is rather subjective so I wont comment on someone else’s personal opinion. But men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

MSN, I’m sorry you feel your body is inferior to a woman’s body.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
8 years ago

MSN, I’m sorry you feel your body is inferior to a woman’s body.

Ahhhh…….the sour grapes fallacy!

The ‘purpose’ of someones body is that which the person living in that body gives to it. I don’t by that bullshit that a woman’s body has the “purpose” of bearing children.

katz
8 years ago

Ahhhh…….the sour grapes fallacy!

Code purple!

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

You said.

Not equal.

NOT EQUAL.

Also… sour grapes fallacy? Um, can you elucidate? Is it commonly known by another name? It doesn’t seem to be on my list of common logical fallacies.

TheMcGee
TheMcGee
8 years ago

many women body builders who continue to pump iron cease having periods altogether.

Having your period != being “womanly”. Sometimes when I get really really stressed I miss periods. And some women just stop having them altogether when they reach a certain age. And some women just don’t get them for other reasons. And some women have them intermittently naturally. And some women work out a ton and still get them. And sometimes weightlifting won’t affect the menstrual cycle but running a certain number of miles a week will. Good grief, you seriously don’t know that there are all kinds of different people and there is no “one way” for people to be (woman or not).

But men and women are not physically equal and denying this won’t change a dayamn thang.

And not all men are physically equal. And not all women are physically equal. And not all people are physically equal. Damn! Hmmm. I think I’m sensing a pattern. You’d think people were individuals or something.

Monsieur sans Nom
Monsieur sans Nom
8 years ago

@TheMcGee: I already addressed the fact that “womanly” is a purely subjective term and made no such claim that lacking periods is un-womanly.

@howardbann1ster: You’re making a inference about how I personally feel about my own body which you cannot possibly know or verify. But most of all, it does not invalidate what I posted about female body builders and the fact that men’s and women’s bodies are built differently. I claim that there is no physical equality between the sexes because for one their bodies are distinguishable not only by appearance, but on measurable physical performance stats.

katz
8 years ago

Howard: I’m pretty sure it’s on Tom’s list of not-really-fallacies-but-feminists-keep-saying-it-and-I-wish-it-were-against-the-rules.

Shaenon
8 years ago

Dammit, people, NWO just wants you to focus on the real problem affecting the Olympics: non-Western culture! What are all these foreigners doing messing up our Olympic games?

NWO, the original article was written by a Turkish man and published in Turkish. Does Turkey count as part of Western culture? Where’s the cutoff line?

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

Dude, you said they ain’t equal. Either you think your body is beter–which is obviously a hateful beleif that I would not want to say you had, because that would be putting mean and nasty thoughts in your mouth–or you thought they were better. And I wanted to assure you that just because you don’t have their body doesn’t mean you’re less than them.

Unless you’d like to upgrade to ‘hateful.’ Go for it.

RubyHypatia
RubyHypatia
8 years ago

I strength train and wear sports bras. Never did I think I was destroying womanhood. In fact, I feel sorry for, “The Thinking Housewife” for having such a narrow view of womanhood. Rigid gender roles are stupid.

jennydevildoll
8 years ago

Oh no! The women athletes don’t meet the standards of some newspaper columnist and the Parroting Housewife! And they have nothing to console themselves with but their gold medals, likely future endorsement deals, fitness, fame, and sense of achievement at something that few people of either gender accomplish in their lifetimes. What’s a girl to do? Tsk tsk.

Zanana
Zanana
8 years ago

No joke, my stay-at-home-dad housemate is teaching his daughter to shoot soccer goals in our backyard while I read this thread. It’s soothing my heart.

Molly McGee
Molly McGee
8 years ago

@TheMcGee: I already addressed the fact that “womanly” is a purely subjective term and made no such claim that lacking periods is un-womanly.

Nope. You just quoted someone who said” So if a woman pumps iron it undermines the purpose of her body, makes her less womanly?”

And then said this:

“Well, it certainly does cause a decrease in estrogen and many women body builders who continue to pump iron cease having periods altogether.”

But sure, I totally understand how you’re not saying that’s un-womanly. And I can totally understand why you wouldn’t want to comment on the personal opinion of someone who says that such a thing is un-womanly because it’s totes personal opinion. It can’t possibly be wrong and completely conflict with reality. Ya know, made up standards for what makes someone a particular gender.

TheMcGee
TheMcGee
8 years ago

Oops. Other computer used my other handle.

Vitamin D
Vitamin D
8 years ago

@ MSN So having your period is womanly and men like womanly things. It’s a given women are on this earth to make men love them. So it only makes sense men love the shit out of our periods. Instead of winning gold medals, training hard in sports we love, pushing ourselves to the edge of endurance and accomplishing stuff, women ought to take the time men are competing to just talk to them endlessly about menstruation. Dudes will love it.

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
8 years ago

McGee, you’ve wished in vain. I made extra sure I had a daughter (prayers to Bona Dea).

But don’t fret. I’ll be certain that my daughter grows up to be a good little Valkeryie for the hivemind. I mean, she’s only ten now and she wouldn’t put up with your shit. She’d laugh and tell you you’re an idiot.

teiresias
teiresias
8 years ago

Jenna Marbles tore that Aytug dude a new asshole over that one. Now granted she’s hot either way, but she’s the sort of person that people who would say things like this can’t deal with either way — I’m fond of reminding people who dis her that she has a master’s degree and is in all likelihood smarter than they are. (That goes double for her former boss at Barstool Sports — Dave Portnoy’s… complaints… only make sense when you remember he’s a dudebro writing for dudebros and doesn’t know what to do with a woman who could go on a three-day bender and still out-think him.)

fembot
8 years ago

NWO’s Marxist obsession is getting old. Every time he uses that word I need to drink. Or drive a nail through my hand. Either one.

gelar
gelar
8 years ago

Oh no! The women athletes don’t meet the standards of some newspaper columnist and the Parroting Housewife! And they have nothing to console themselves with but their gold medals, likely future endorsement deals, fitness, fame, and sense of achievement at something that few people of either gender accomplish in their lifetimes.

This is why I can’t even muster up some annoyance; the same with that article on Sally Ride a few posts back. “But but but womanhood!” just falls flat.

Reynardine
Reynardine
8 years ago

Oh, how cute! NWO is making a pest of himself *everywhere* and he’s just as unoriginal wherever he goes.

Men and women aren’t the same. Women can’t piss on a wall and men can’t have periods. Other than that, MSN, I’ve seen little bitty peasant women who could throw you over the wall, at least unless you’re obese.

And Laura Wood is a dreary, *envious* bitch.

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
8 years ago

Laura isn’t a bitch. She’s just bitchy.

Sharculese
8 years ago

Calling guys paedos because they find a 16 year old attractive is a little ridiculous. I guess Taylor Swift is a paedo because she was with the twilight and Kennedy kid before they were 18. Perhaps the female athletes could stop wearing next to nothing and maybe we would focus on their accomplishments instead of appearance.

or we could just focus on their accomplishments because they won the fucking olympics and that’s kind of accomplishment sort of dwarfs the pretend concerns of empty-headed moral scolds like you?

pillowinhell
pillowinhell
8 years ago

Gee, guess I’m extra womanly right now, given my general body shape and the lovely fact that I’ve hit perimenopause, so things are a little out of whack lately.

Damn family genetics!

Sharculese
8 years ago

I CAN’T FOCUS ON THE MONUMENTAL SHIT THESE GIRLS DID BECAUSE OMIGOD I CAN SEE THEIR LEGS

how dumb do you have to be to find this argument compelling

TheMcGee
TheMcGee
8 years ago

@pillowinhell,

Uh oh. I can see I’ve put my foot in it. I’m a little thrown by your comment though. I think I might have expressed myself poorly or had blinders on and expressed something offensive. Can you point out what I said that has offended you so I can either explain myself or learn where my blinders are and what I opinions/beliefs I have that I need to examine. I truly did not mean anything offensive and I feel terrible that I may have said something that would cause someone to be so angry by it.

Thae86
Thae86
8 years ago

I must be totes anti-women, then. Just yesterday I was wrestling around on the mat, practicing take downs in my martial arts class. I plan on taking up free running. LOTS of sweating and working out to build up my endurance. SO evil.

(I mean, at some point, after I sit around and read all these blogs…)

Tulgey Logger
Tulgey Logger
8 years ago

Perhaps the female athletes could stop wearing next to nothing and maybe we would focus on their accomplishments instead of appearance.

Time Buttman has spent focusing on the accomplishments of Hijab-wearing Olympic athletes:

00lolwho seconds

Polliwog
Polliwog
8 years ago

Perhaps the female athletes could stop wearing next to nothing and maybe we would focus on their accomplishments instead of appearance.

Okay, this is completely hilarious, because not only is it stupid on its face, you’re specifically talking about gymnasts.

This is what female gymnasts wear: http://media.hamptonroads.com/cache/files/images/862521000.jpg

This is what male gymnasts wear: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6lfl5uXFh1r8h6rlo1_400.jpg

I want you to explain to me how exactly the women are wearing “next to nothing” whereas the men are properly attired. Because what I see are members of both genders dressed in a way that allows them to move freely, as you would need to when you’re, you know, doing gymnastics.

Dvärghundspossen
8 years ago

Training as hard as professional athetes do can fuck with your hormones in a non-healthy way, but that goes for men as well as women. It’s just that people only ever focus on women who loses their period, perhaps because that’s such a clear sign that your hormones are messed up. But training yourself to perform the feats super-athletes do isn’t really healthy for EITHER gender. Still, you don’t become a professional athlete unless you think it’s worth it, at the end of the day. It’s their bodies, their choice.

@Vitamin D, the testosterone question IS a bit more complicated than that.
In equestrian men and women compete on equal terms, and in shooting guns and bows men and women were only separated some time ago because men dislike losing to women. But in most sports, men on average perform better than women on average. They do that, because they have more testosteron. It used to be that you competed in men’s sports if you had a penis and in women’s sports if you had a vagina, but that was changed, since penises and vaginas in themselves have nothing to do with performance. Nowadays, you compete in women’s sports if you’re below a certain level of testosteron, and that makes much more sense, since women having less testosteron than men is the SOLE JUSTIFICATION for having “women’s sports” as separate events.

Semenya was treated terribly shitty by the world wide media, when they questioned whether she really was a woman. Of course she’s really a woman. And yeah, it sucks that this particular genetic gift must be “treated” before she’s allowed to compete, while all other genetic gifts are allowed to flourish in sports. Still, if we say that you can have as much testosteron as your body naturally produces and still compete in women’s sports – the whole point with having women’s sports as separate events disappear.

sthlivingincolor
8 years ago

You know, I have about had it up to HERE with people telling me what my body is supposed to look like. If you have any opinions about the way I look, just keep them to your fucking self, because I am NOT interested. And my “womanhood,” whatever that might be, is my damn business and no one else’s. Here’s a news flash: the way I look is the LEAST important part of who I am.

The coverage of the Olympics has really pissed me off, as you can see.