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Complementarian Loner: Contraception “puts the woman in the dominant position and she then determines when and under what conditions she will ACQUIRE his seed.”

Old School birth control

When I think about contraception, my thoughts generally run to things like this:

“Is this condom on inside-out? Oh, crap.”

“I guess IUD’s aren’t necessarily a good idea for some women unless they like bleeding from their vagina every day for six months.”

“Has anyone ever actually used a female condom?”

Over on Complementarian Loners, an MRA-adjacent “relationship” blog written by a couple of Catholic converts, the bitter divorced dude who calls himself 7man has some more, well, advanced ideas about contraception. By “advanced” I mean, of course,  “odd and terrible.”

He starts off with this proposition:

A man and a woman cannot develop a great relationship if contraception is part of it or if they met while she was using hormonal artificial birth control. REAL committed, trusting, exclusive sexual intercourse is essential.

Oh, it gets weirder from there:

Birth Control is a misnomer since this is her speaking through her body saying, “I control when I will give birth, not God, not a man.” It doesn’t require any respect for fertility since fertility is subverted. This puts the woman in the dominant position and she then determines when and under what conditions she will ACQUIRE his seed rather than being open to RECEIVE. (Is woman not a vessel?)

I’m pretty sure a woman is a person, dude.

Usually the contraception is done by the woman, it messes with her body; she blocks the ability to receive and the whole exercise becomes taking pleasure from the other. Of course, she can always lie about taking it or not taking it. This is in essence lying with the body. A man can lie too if he withholds his gift by vasectomy or by condom.

In his profile on the blog, 7man refers to his ex-wife as “BatShitCrazy” (apparently that’s just one word now), but I think she demonstrated some pretty clearheaded and rational thinking in getting herself away from a guy who can refer to his semen as a “gift” without giggling.

[I]t is women acting as succubi. And so the ultimate end of a failed attempt to block PROCREATION is abortion. After all, God surely did not do his part and create a soul for the life that she did not intend to receive, right? Does her hamster prevent God from fulfilling his part of creation? Not likely! …

I am left with the impression that subverting fertility may be just as much an abomination to God as is divorce.

I hope you mention that right up top in your Match.com profile, dude, because that’s the sort of shit women need to know right off the bat before they send you any misguided “winks.”

Oh, and apparently men and women can’t have good sex unless the man controls everything and the woman cannot leave:

Can men and women have what they so deeply desire (in a relationship) while withholding the central gift of self? Have Christians stopped to consider the word PROCREATION? We participate in the CREATION of God in our act of sexual intercourse. We assist in CREATION of a body, but God provides the soul. CREATION is intended to occur in conjunction with a COVENANT. Can intercourse be unitive if this element is totally removed from the act of marriage, in the one-flesh-union?

A COVENANT is an OATH, a BINDING and a COMMITMENT. This is more than a contract or a whim. The sublime pleasure of sexual intercourse cannot happen when such aspects are blocked. The kind of fulfilling sex that every person longs for and rarely experiences is also precluded when the woman endeavors to control the relationship. In order for her to feel the fullness of the union, she must be claimed in a COVENANT to one man PERMANENTLY.

I can only imagine Mr. 7man explaining all this very earnestly to his date as they munch on breadsticks at the local Olive Garden, after which the unfortunate woman excuses herself to go to the ladies room and, as soon as she is out of his eyesight, slips out the back door of the restaurant and literally runs the entire way home.

7man closes with this little puzzler:

[S]uccumbing to passionate desire is easier without the risk of pregnancy and therefore commitment is not essential prior to the parting of thighs. Does this ever turn out for the good?

Yes. Yes it does.

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kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@ladysadie:

It means that you didn’t express your opinion on your own, you brilliant person you. The opinion/idea is yours, but you rely on pre-existing structures to communicate it to other people. How many more times are you gonna make a mess of this metaphor?

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

Raising children isn’t as simple as saying words. There’s schools where they are sent to learn, food grown by others that they eat, products that others make so you can clean up after them, and communities that they can participate in and be part of.

You did not raise your children without assistence from the government or any other person. I don’t know why this is so difficult for you to understand… It’s like you’re pretending that we’re saying they aren’t your children. O_O

Sharculese
12 years ago

OK, as far as infrastructure, if I pay for it but don’t personally participate in building it, that invalidates my self reliance also?

yes, the state pooled resources to complete a project with disbursed benefits that it isn’t in any particular actor’s interest to complete on their own, but in everyone’s interest to have. this is the kind of basic What Government Is stuff you should probably learn before you offer your opinion on the subject.

You didn’t build the transmission lines that allow you to disseminate your opinion, does that mean it was someone else’s opinion also?

what? no, forming an opinion and broadcasting an opinion are not even close to the same thing. this is not how analogies work. are you sure people pay you for your writing? did you check the money to make sure there’s not a picture of jefferson davis on it?

Kyrie
Kyrie
12 years ago

You were lucky enough in life that you didn’t need much ‘help’. Yay you.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@Kyrie:

Yeah, that’s another thing… “Help” can refer to the support that you get from your family to be able to raise children without having to worry about how you’re gonna eat or pay the bills from day to day, whether that support be actual money or education that allows you to get a good job…

Sharculese
12 years ago

why do all these anti-government rants come down to the fact that the ranter doesnt seem to have a clear idea what governments are for?

Myoo
Myoo
12 years ago

@kirbywarp
I don’ think you were implying this but I feel I must clarify anyway.
I wasn’t saying that women should be subservient to men, I was just saying that the justification offered for that belief is blatantly wrong. I actually don’t even think people should be subservient to God, but that’s another kettle of fish.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@Sharculese:

They seem to think that the only thing government does it hand out food stamps and free money to lazy people… And then can’t even begin to imagine how someone might actually need those services.

ladysadie1
12 years ago

Please, enlighten me “what governments are for” since I am clueless…

Then follow up with why the Second Amendment was only there so rednecks can hunt ducks…

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@Myoo:

I was just trying to continue your train of thought, not oppose it. 🙂 I suppose it would have been clearly if I had said something like “Not only that, but” at the beginning. Sorry about the confusion.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

Ladysadie, I think you’re confused. The Second Amendment doesn’t exist for the sole purpose of allowing rednecks to hunt ducks. Maybe you could find the info you want through google? I’m sure there’s a history of the ammendment somewhere.

hellkell
hellkell
12 years ago

Grammar, Spelling and Punctuation…apparently a lost art.

Oh, ICE BURN. Only not.

Cute, this one thinks she’s a professional writer. I fucking love the internet today.

ladiesadie, did you miss the header of this site, by any chance?

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
12 years ago

CL: Erm… that was a polite request. There’s a difference between a polite request and telling someone what to do. You might want to look into it.

Well, the first time was a polite request, the second was shading towards demand in my head… They do of course have a right to completely ignore me, as I have a right to say “Well if you won’t engage with my attempt to understand the logical basis of your views, I will assume there isn’t one, you silly poopyhead.”

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
12 years ago

Ah yes. Forgot to say something.

CL: if you won’t engage with my attempt to understand the logical basis of your views, I will assume there isn’t one, you silly poopyhead.

BlackBloc (@XBlackBlocX)

God grant us (both men and women) freewill, but you “Gotta Serve Somebody”

CHOOSE

NON SERVIAM

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOLBj8cgAA0&w=420&h=315%5D

Sharculese
12 years ago

Please, enlighten me “what governments are for” since I am clueless…

Then follow up with why the Second Amendment was only there so rednecks can hunt ducks…

governments are for pooling resources to solve collective action problems

they are also staring wide eyed at the fact that anyone would show so little dignity as to respond with the passive aggressive whining you produced

as to your non sequitur about the second amendment, i dont know what the fuck because it doesnt make any sense, but i wanna point out again that your need to make these snotty little potshots at ‘the liberals’ is part of why youre having so much trouble being taken seriously

ladysadie1
12 years ago

I do not “think” I am a writer. I write for a living. I have been in the written/visual communication industry for over 25 years. Longer than many commenters here haved been breathing.

@kirby

Yes, thanks for having some sense. I was only responding to the “what Government is” snark of another commenter…

Have a nice afternoon, I need to go build a road, spin some cloth and figure out how to build a vehicle from scratch so I can say that I earn my own way in this world…

Sharculese
12 years ago

thanks blackbloc

i clicked your link and a timid dog looked at me with horror before leaving the room. now i have to go comfort her.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
12 years ago

Um.

We weren’t saying you have to do everything yourself to say you earn your way. We were taking issue with a specific claim:

raise my children without assistance from any other person, male or female- or Uncle Sam either.

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@kirby

Yes, thanks for having some sense. I was only responding to the “what Government is” snark of another commenter…

*shiver*

I feel… unclean…

Sharculese
12 years ago

Yes, thanks for having some sense. I was only responding to the “what Government is” snark of another commenter…

you’re an idiot

BlackBloc (@XBlackBlocX)

>>>Satan also detested truth.

Satan is the only being in your mythology that has always been truthful (at least, in canon) while your Demiurge lied right from the start in Genesis to Adam & Eve and didn’t stop there.

Sharculese
12 years ago

yeah i think hes confusing satan with morgoth

kirbywarp
kirbywarp
12 years ago

@Sharculese:

Especially considering I have four comments on this page specifically commenting on hir notion of raising children on her own, each one saying that she doesn’t. And especially especially considering that I was trying to be willfully obtuse about hir second ammendment thing and imply that nobody actually made that argument or believes it…

Weird day today.

MorkaisChosen
MorkaisChosen
12 years ago

And/or the Ebon Dragon.

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