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cuteness kitties off topic open thread

Kitty Day! [UPDATED: KITTIES PROCURED]

I will be heading out to a cat shelter in about an hour. I hope to return with a kitty or two. Probably not as large as Mr. Martin’s kitty above.

UPDATE:  Success! Two tiny adorable kittens are careening around my bedroom at high velocities. It is now 4:32 AM. They have been doing this off and on since I brought them home roughly ten hours ago. I have no idea where the fuck they get all their energy. From cat food? I think I might have to start eating it myself.

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potsherds
potsherds
8 years ago

Good luck! Kitties are the bestest. 😀

Viscaria
Viscaria
8 years ago

Cats 1 and 2 are nearly that big! Cat 1 is closer because he’s a pudgy fella, but they’re both incredibly long and have huge heads.

My man’s going away for a week, so I’m kinda bummed, but I’m comforting myself with the knowledge that I get to kitty-sit while he’s gone. All the snuggles shall be mine! Muahahahahaha!

I hope you find your kitty match(es), David, and that they are snugly bundles of tiny meows.

Lweydd
Lweydd
8 years ago

We want pictures!

howardbann1ster
howardbann1ster
8 years ago

I’m confused. If David is a kitten… going to bring home a kitten… will we get twice as many posts?

😛

In all seriousness, cats are awesome. I have two at home.

Viscaria
Viscaria
8 years ago

Snuggly, rather. Snugly seems like the name they would give a line of stuffed toys shaped like aliens in the 90s.

Freitag
Freitag
8 years ago

Congrats to you and your new friends. Shelter pets are the best!

Dracula
Dracula
8 years ago

Aw, good luck David! I love kitties. I wish I was in a position to have one of my own.

Also Steve Martin’s friend up there looks like a tabby version of my housemate’s cat. He’s a black and white tuxedo kitty, who is huge and fluffy. 🙂

Hank
Hank
8 years ago

Whosoever they may be – they be lucky kitty

Snowy
Snowy
8 years ago

Yay!

blitzgal
8 years ago

YAY!! I second the notion — we demand pictures!!

aworldanonymous
8 years ago

Pics or it didn’t happen.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Nthing the demand for pictures!

Cliff Pervocracy
8 years ago

Well I hope you have fun WITH YOUR CATS!

/mras’-worst-threat

…No, really, I do.

cloudiah
8 years ago

Yay for kitties! Kitties are A W E S O M E.

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

You definitely need more than one! Can’t have a proper CATSPLOSION with only one cat. 😛

Discorda
Discorda
8 years ago

Yay! Kitties!!! I also want to see pictures

Noadi
Noadi
8 years ago

Good luck! I hope you find the perfect kitties for your family.

I’ve been trying to talk my boyfriend into a kitty. I argue that kitties are cute and my dog loves cats and wouldn’t it be nice if she had more company. He makes some silly argument about allergies.

Amnesia
Amnesia
8 years ago

Can’t tell for sure, but I’m pretty sure my Niko is that big, just not quite as rounded. Just about everyone who’s seen him IRL says he’s the biggest cat they’ve ever seen.
Pictures for those of you that didn’t see them the last time I showed him off.
Niko #1
Niko #2
One of these days I’ll get a good pic of him on something other than my laptop camera.

Amnesia
Amnesia
8 years ago

Oh, and I also want to see pics of David’s new kitty/kitties/cat/cats. That goes without saying.

RubyHypatia
RubyHypatia
8 years ago

My neighbor’s cat is a pretty big boy himself. He eats the food I put out for a stray cat.

the twisted spinster
the twisted spinster
8 years ago

Awesome! Cats are the best.

Karalora
Karalora
8 years ago

KITTIES!

Just to see whether everyone here has been paying attention, it’s time for a KITTY POP QUIZ!

Scenario: Uh-oh! You were petting your new kitty, and it whipped around and scratched you! What is the correct way to handle this situation?

a) Stop petting it, as it is clearly not in the mood. Wait until it feels like being petted before trying again.
b) Check the kitty for injuries or other conditions, in case your petting caused it pain somehow.
c) Teaching moment! Bop the kitty’s nose (gently) and say “NO!” Repeat each time it scratches you until it learns who’s the dominant mammal around here.
d) Scritch the kitty’s tummy, since apparently it wants to play rough! Be sure to back off if it starts acting scared or distressed, or if the chomping gets too intense for your own comfort.
e) Euthanize it and go back to playing with your little lady lovelies.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that C and E are bad choices.

Noadi
Noadi
8 years ago

Generally A though sometimes B if kittty is also showing other signs of distress. C gets you scratched again, D might be what the cat wants but you get bitten and scratched, if you answer E you should only have pet rocks.

WordSpinner
WordSpinner
8 years ago

Besides Noadi’s answer, there is also (f)–if the kitty seems to be in a mood for play, go get a toy that is not your hands (like a cat wand) and play with the kitty that way.

Hank
Hank
8 years ago

Hi Kalalora

Whatever the kitty does is ok.

thebewilderness
thebewilderness
8 years ago

Okay! Hey, does anybody know where I can get some cat handcuffs? I’ve gotta get a pair of cat handcuffs. Either two little ones like this, to go around the little paws.. or a big one that hooks onto my arm and then hooks onto the cat. I found out my cat was embezzling from me, so I’ve gotta get a little pair.. of cat handcuffs, so.. Well, I found out that when I’m away, he goes to the mailbox, picks up the checks, take them down to the bank and cashes them. The way I caught him, I went out to his little house, where he sleeps at night, and there was like $3,000 worth of cat toys out there. And you can’t return them, because they have spit all over them.. I don’t know where he is now, I guess he went out to Catalina, or something like that, I don’t know.. [ audience groans slightly ] No. He bought a catamaran, and went out.. [ audience groans again ] No, he got it out of a catalog.. [ groans ] This is a catastrophe! Hey, just remember – comedy is not pretty!

Martin on SNL in 1977

chocomintlipwax
8 years ago

Usually with my cats the answer would be D. I also knew a stray cat that was like this–invitations to pet were usually met with the GRAB, BITE, KICK, lick lick lick, KICK KICK BITE. I learned that it was far less painful to keep my hand limp during all of this. Since I’ve seen cats do this to other cats, I assume this behavior is more of that “humans are just big kitties” behavior.

But if the cat is just hanging out and does that, I would assume it’s either pissed off or in pain.

Possibly pissed off. Sometimes it’s the kitty version of “no means no.” If it’s usually a nice cat, I’d guess it has an ouchie. Or you’re touching it in a thoroughly unpleasant way.

There was another stray that I quasi-adopted (I fed it and it stalked me around my neighborhood, but pets were a no-no in my building). If I tried to pet her she would raise her paw like, “I’mma slap you!” And she did slap me a few times. And bite. I kept wondering when our relationship would get to a point where she would “put out” in return for my niceness, ya know, but she continued to be a handtease–meow, roll on back, meow, rub my leg, meow meow, rub rub, OMG DO NOT TOUCH ME. Until about a week before I was going to leave, and then suddenly she wanted cuddles. Dammit.

clairedammit
clairedammit
8 years ago

Niko is beautiful.

David, I hope you get two! We’ve adopted pairs of siblings from the SPCA twice, and they definitely seem happier when they live with a sib (our shelter won’t let them be adopted until they’ve been neutered.) There are no downsides to having two, except for the double vet-bills, and I think the $$ are worth it.

Karalora
Karalora
8 years ago

Actually, any of A through D (or WordSpinner’s F) might be the right answer, depending on circumstances. C should be used very sparingly, and only if the nose bops are very light, but if you have a cat with an attitude problem that tries to challenge your authority, you’ve got to put the Fear of H. sapiens into it somehow. Other than that, pay attention to what else the cat is doing:

If kitty is also growling or hissing, probably A (but possibly B – some cats react to pain by getting cantankerous).
If kitty is also flinching or crying, probably B.
If kitty is also purring or rolling over, probably D/F (depending on your own tolerance for pain and play preferences)

Some cats, especially when very young, don’t know their own strength and bite/scratch too hard while playing. You can usually tell when this is the case because it will bolt behind furniture when you go “OW!” and then peek out to see what you’re doing. In that case, you just have to be patient and modulate playtime until it figures out where the boundaries are.

Cats are truly wonderful and every one is unique. I recommend them to almost anyone – they are the most low-maintenance pet you can have that will still love you back.

(If anyone answered E…stick to your dolls, sicko. I mean that.)

pecunium
8 years ago

yay kitties.

I need something to refresh the soul from Nikan, so I’m going to go and shamelessly taunt the people of my neighborhood with a new kilt, and stop by the local for some fries and a beer.

heidihi
heidihi
8 years ago

KITTYQUEST!

@Naodi, you said “I’ve been trying to talk my boyfriend into a kitty” and i read it as “I’ve been trying to TURN my boyfriend into a kitty” and i was like…misandry?

i wish i could have a kitty but i have allergies so i have to live vicariously through the kitty pics on this and other sites. hope to see more pics soon! 🙂

raspberryberet13
8 years ago

Happy Kitty Day! And, yes, you need at least two!

And PICS when possible, plz.

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

I LOBE KITTIES. But BoyFantastic is horribly allergic (so much so that when we visit my family next month we have to stay in a tent in the garden because my mum has three cats).

We are hopefully adopting rats in September ^_^

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

When BoyFantastic and I first met I had two cats, Sancho and Jemima. Jemima was tiny and terribly dim, she would lick cheesegraters and trip over her own paws. Sancho was my big fat baby, he would nag me until I picked him up and cradled him while singing riot grrrl songs, upon which he would fall asleep. He HATED BoyFantastic, so much so that he used to sleep in his baseball cap as he seemed to know BF was allergic, run outside and chow down grass then run over to BF just to vomit on him, then run outside again to repeat it and every time BF put his arm round me he would yowl at the top of his lungs until I picked him up, then immediately fall silent and I swear to gods, give BF the smuggest look I’ve ever seen a cat capable of.

I miss my kitties 🙁 I moved 300 miles to live with BF and had to leave them with my housemate.

Dracula
Dracula
8 years ago

We are hopefully adopting rats in September ^_^

Yay! Rats are friggin’ adorable.

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

Sancho and Jemima doing hugging (Jemima left, Sancho right)

@Dracula I know, I’m really excited! When I was a kid we used to look after a couple of rats and they were so cute. BoyFantastic has had them before too. I think I’m just excited because this is the longest I’ve been without pets. At one point when I was young we had two dogs, three cats, two guinea pigs, two ferrets, the two loaned rats, a hamster and a tank full of fish. In a tiny terraced house XD

Dracula
Dracula
8 years ago

I think there were about fifteen ferrets in this house at one point. By the time I moved in there was only one left, though. And he died not long after I arrived.

TheNatFantastic
8 years ago

Aw man, I loved my ferrets so much. I used to take them for walks on cat harnesses and me and my dad spent a great weekend building them a huge cage that took up 1/3 of the back yard.

Kyrie
Kyrie
8 years ago

Kitties!

ShadetheDruid
ShadetheDruid
8 years ago

Kyrie: Time for this again? http://xkcd.com/231/

😛

Dani Alexis
Dani Alexis
8 years ago

Yayyy! And add me to the list of requests (nay, demands!) for pics, but only if your new kitty(ies) is(are) the cutest kitty(ies) in the world. (Disclaimer: I am pretty sure every kitty is The Cutest Kitty in the World. Don’t tell my kitty, as she is convinced she is the Only Kitty In the World.)

Integral
Integral
8 years ago

Yay kitties! I went to the shelter a month ago to drop off some food and kitty litter and somehow by the time I left I had mysteriously acquired a kitten. Her name is Kaylee and she enjoys trying to devour my toes while I sleep, wrapping herself around the older kitty’s head and sitting on my keyboard.

cloudiah
8 years ago

I just rescued 2 kittens in November, and they are an adorable handful, but the last time I was out buying cat supplies they had rescue kittens to be adopted and it took all of my willpower to get out of there without taking them all home. Kittens have a magical power to make a person temporarily suspend reason and think that, sure, 12 cats and a person can live happily in an apartment.

RubyHypatia
RubyHypatia
8 years ago

David, I hope you make sure your kitty has plenty of up space. My cat’s up space is on top of the cupboards. She loves being able to look down on everyone from her perch.

Pam
Pam
8 years ago

@cloudiah,

but the last time I was out buying cat supplies they had rescue kittens to be adopted and it took all of my willpower to get out of there without taking them all home. Kittens have a magical power to make a person temporarily suspend reason and think that, sure, 12 cats and a person can live happily in an apartment.

I know EXACTLY what you mean!! I’m the same about puppies as well as kitties. And when I drop off food and litter donations to the local animal shelter, I have to be careful, lest I bring home yet another puppy or kitty.

Pam
Pam
8 years ago

And YES to PICS!!!

kladle
kladle
8 years ago

Yo speaking of kitties my family just found a small orange tabby kitten, he is about 8-10 weeks old. I don’t think we can keep him since we already have ~6 cats and we will be moving shortly. If anybody is vaguely in the Pennsylvania area and wants a little buddy, or knows somebody trustworthy who would like one, you can contact me on the forums. He is very very friendly but a bit dumb, and he gets along well with our other cats and our dog

Tak the Hideous New Girl
Tak the Hideous New Girl
8 years ago

Get two kitties! They really are no more work than one kitty.

I adopted two matched kittens that were born under my friends porch to a feral mom cat (who is now spayed BTW). They hated me at first but now Louie Katz and Jenny Linsky are lovely happy cats.

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