Sorry to return so quickly to the fetid mind of MRA blabologist JohnTheOther, but, well, you’ll see why I have.
Here is Mr. TheOther in AskReddit, responding to the question “Women of Reddit, how do you feel about cumshots?” (No, he is not strictly speaking a “woman of Reddit,” not like that’s going to stop him.) Enjoy the irony of the A Voice for Men second banana rehashing, apparently with utter sincerity, an argument once set forth, rather infamously, by a feminist fellow named Hugo Schwyzer. And enjoy the also-very-special response from fellow MRA SuicideBanana, whom we met earlier in the week.
I know Mr. TheOther is concerned about people “quote mining” comments, and presenting them out of context, but in this case, there is no further context. His comment, which I have presented unedited in screenshot form, isn’t in response to any other comment; it’s simply an answer to the question I alluded to above. Mr. TheOther does respond to SuicideBanana’s remarks about him being an advocate and facilitator of violence, as you can see if you clicky click here, but sheds no more light on the issue of porno cumshots as a “pseudo-mystical representation of the sexuality of the viewer.”
Alas for Anti-Manboobz. At least he’s leaving it up, presumably because he hasn’t figured out how to delete blogs.
jesus christ. Is there a woman here who hasn’t been given a “pitch” for some porn-style sex by some dude?
@skeptifem: Probably not. On the other hand I’ve never had a guy pull that “if you really loved me” card or any of that sort of manipulative bullshit when giving me that pitch. I have a really low tolerance for bullshit so it might be that I’ve weeded out guys who do that before getting to that point.
I tried reading antimanboobz a couple of times, but it just hurt my head. I got to his opinion of the word “creep” where the block quote he used explicitly stated that the problem with the word was that women have boundaries which men believe they have the right to cross, but he specifically says that the commenter had no stated reason why the word was used in the correct context. Yes, she did. It was right there, all included in the block quote he used. How do you argue with someone who hasn’t even read what he’s offended by?
I normally never read the comments of any other blog but this one because the naked misogyny/homophobia/racism oozes through the comment if the article is about women/GLBTs/POC. manboobz has such thoughtful, almost always intelligent things to add to the original comments. Then MRAs come in, try for witty responses that almost always boil down to “…your face!” and antimanboobz claims victory in the comments.
I’m gay, but I still have a lot of male friends who are friends because we like the same things and have similar mindsets with similar senses of humour. The chances of them actually having sex is absolutely zero, and yet we still are friends. I don’t know any man, except for maybe my father, who don’t honestly believe that men and women are both people first, and that both genders have the same range of nice people and not nice people. I’d really like to sit down with someone who has so much hatred for half the population and really understand the why behind all the hand-waving and nasty words, but I’m not talking to my father for a multitude of reasons.
But most of all I’d like people who really do have such hatred be marked in some way so that when you go to an interview, get assigned a partner in a work environment or even just in a group of people out socially you know that it’s nothing you said or did, that person just happened to be blinded by his own failings as a human being first.
I’ve noticed that nobody tried that on me after a certain age, the last time it happened I was about 19. Going by comments from friends it seems to mostly be something that men pull on women who they think they can push around, so it makes sense that it would mostly be aimed at younger women. If anyone tried it on current, 38-year-old me I think I’d burst out laughing.
I know Wordle is kind of over, but just for fun I did a word cloud of antimanboobz:
http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/5484340/Untitled
“Boobz” and “violence” are the biggies. “Torvus” is decently sized. I am surprised that “vile” isnt’ bigger, since it seemed to me he used it every other sentence.
Clearly that word cloud is misandrist, just look how big and centralised “men” and “violence” are!
Totally OT, but question for Pecunium since he has knife skills – what’s the most efficient way to cut up a pineapple? I recently found a good cheap local source and intend to buy lots of them while they’re still cheap, but I keep thinking there must be a more efficient way to cut them up than I’m doing, and I’m trying not to ruin my nice expensive knives.
My worst case was a foot fetish; not sure if that qualifies. But it did involve doing a lot of stuff I didn’t want to do.
@ Skeptifem–Yes, I have not been given that pitch, but given that I’m 21, introverted, and a virgin, this probably has more to do with lack of opportunity than anything else.
However, I will say that there are quite a lot of sexual acts that I feel squidgy about because of narratives that tie them to male power and female humiliation, which I think probably makes sex worse for everyone, especially since one of those acts giving a blowjob. (I’m saying this because I don’t have sexual experience and so a lot of my feelings about sex come from media narratives and not personal experience.)
Perhaps this Spearhead article, highlighting a Salon article regarding the death of a male porn star, encapsulates it:
A Life-Support System For a Penis
For me the most annoying case was probably made worse by the fact that the guy is a diagnosed sociopath (I of course did not know this when we started dating, he saved that information for much later). Very manipulative person, so he cycled through pretty much every complaint/argument you could think of, from “how do you know you don’t like it until you try it?” to “well other women like it” to “I thought you were kinky? why are you being so boring?” to “it hurts my feelings that you’re rejecting my sexuality in this way” to “woe is me, I have been judged, now you think I’m weird, don’t you want to reassure me by trying it?” to outright sulking when I told him that he was welcome to go find someone else who did share his interest (wasn’t even suggesting we break up since at that point I was more open to the idea of non-monogamous relationships, just making it clear that it wasn’t going to happen with me and suggeting that he go find a third party to indulge with, at which point he finally made it clear that no, it wasn’t the act itself, it was the idea of me doing it that was what he was fixated on). If nothing else it was certainly educational, especially since I was a psychology student at the time.
I’m sure it’s stating the obvious, but the complaint about male porn actors being paid less than women is hilarious. Female porn actors get paid lots and are allowed to do whatever they want, but a male actor can’t make the same amount of money unless he allows himself to be penetrated? Oh, the unfairness of it all!
Cassandra: You have a couple of options.
1: They aren’t too hard on knives (no more than any other acidic fruit)
2: A long knife is best, so you can avoid chewing up your hands.
3: There are tools which will core, spiral slice and peel, all at once.
3a They do have the disadvantage of being meant for “average” pineapples, so smaller ones will be less than perfectly peeled, and larger ones will be incompletely harvested.
So I’d say get a big knife (10″), or a device. I like the one from Rösle.
no offense, but y’all are missing the bigger picture…
this is a great opportunity for Schwyzer and JtO to putt their “money where their mouths are.”
http://stonerwithaboner.wordpress.com/2012/07/05/money-hots/
They can mend the wounds between feminism and the MRM….
re men and porn. Men make less per movie, this is true. It’s also true that men work more, and for longer. This is in part because being a porn star is harder for men than for women. They have to be able to not come for along time, and then, pretty much, come on command.
They have to do it with an audience. They have to be able to perform with women they don’t know; who are, perhaps, not the sort of women they would choose for themselves.
They also don’t face the same sorts of shaming for their work. Some female performer was recently savaged in the press because she had the audacity to be working to encourage literacy.
The gall of it. Those kids might grow up and find out a woman who had sex for money wasn’t a stupid bint, good for nothing else. The shame their parents would have to endure if other people found out a porn star (who happened to be a woman too) had spoken at the public library.
She was pilloried for it.
The men? Mostly ignored.
So women have shorter careers, and if they aren’t careful, they have limits on later careers.
So yeah, they get more per film, but I bet they make less at it in a lifetime.
Time to begging us to visit his site: 0 minutes
Well. I suppose then, if facials are ALL about acceptance of ones partner, these guys won’t mind getting one? I mean, mystical sperm is mystical right? I personally don’t like the idea, I know others who do….but my guess is that the guys who think this way would not like the facial if they were on the receiving end. And I doubt they could really explain why.
I find myself slightly uncomfortable with the idea of, “Well, I just don’t tolerate that kind of manipulation!” tone here. I mean, that’s good, but I thought I was too, and then found myself with a surprise finger up my ass. (“But girls like it in porn!”)
Sometimes, it’s not about manipulation. And even if it is, I don’t think it’s shameful to admit you were successfully manipulated. I mean, that’s what the shit was MADE for.
pillowinhell: That is SWAB’s argument.
Its funny how people with feel the shame of acts they did not commit or were manipulated into and harmed no one but themselves. Well, it might be…if the people who did shameful things actually felt any remorse.
And sometimes it is about manipulation. I’m not seeing any good reason why people shouldn’t talk about that just because “not even trying to manipulate the woman into something, just going to go right ahead and do what I want and then whine if she complains” is also a thing that happens.
The funny thing about his porn argument in terms of pay scale is how it intersects with the old sexist argument that it’s OK that women make less money because men choose to do the more dangerous, dirty, looked down upon by society jobs and women do not. Leaving aside for a moment the fact that many of those jobs aren’t actually avaliable to women on a practical level, the underlying argument is that if women want to make more money they should be willing to take on jobs where there’s a higher chance of injury, it’s hard physical work, and people may look down on you for it. Well, that’s a pretty decent description of the job involved if someone takes on the person-being-penetrated role in porn, so if you leave aside the homophobia what he’s basically saying is that men shouldn’t be expected to take on the job in porn that’s harder on the body in the long term and more looked down upon, instead they should just be paid the same way for the job that comes with less risk of injury and less societal contempt.
It’s just kind of funny if you look at the two arguments together. Porn is a case where if men are willing to take on both a higher risk of pain/injury and a higher risk of not being respected by society they can make more money per job, but apparently that is not an acceptable tradeoff at all from his perspective.
RE: CassandraSays
Oh no, I’m cool with people talking about it. It just bothers me a little that there seems to be this undertone that the only reason people get manipulated is because they’re not strong enough. Am I just being oversensitive and misreading things?
I read that black performers get paid less in porn too, and so do other people deemed “irregular”, even if their difference is what the porn fetishizes. Vanessa Blue talked about the pay difference for black performers. She made it seem like the producer will straight up tell you that you have to settle for less because of race.